Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 19:00:00 GMT -5
My nephew is getting married in late March of next year. He and his fiancée are both well-established in their careers and her father is a financial planner, and this is going to be a Big Deal. Evening wedding at a historic church- please do not show up late because they won't open the doors after the ceremony starts. They love kids, but this is adults only. Reception at the Rich and Famous Country Club. Black tie optional. (This is all on their Web site.) She and her Dad are financial advisors. Hmmmm, I guess business is good.
So, DH will wear a perfectly respectable navy suit. I have one good black dress (would check, of course, to make sure that's OK- I think black dresses at weddings are considered chic now but I don't know how traditional she is). I really don't have any other appropriate dresses, I don't want to show up in anything cheap with that crowd, and I don't want to blow hundreds of dollars on something I'll wear once every 5 years. Consignment shops here are scarce and so far I haven't found any that seem to deal in designer dresses. E-Bay is dicey because of vanity sizing on high-end brands. I don't want something that costs $200 and then costs another $100 to tailor to fit properly.
I do, however, own a couple of tailor-made business suits. One is navy and I don't want to look like DH and I dressed alike; the other is a pinstripe. I have lots of lovely (real) jewelry and expensive girly shoes to wear with it so I won't look like I'm trying to imitate the guys. I've gravitated towards tailored looks all my life and I always feel good in this suit.
I consulted a few women at work who'd been married recently; they said they'd never notice. DH thinks it's a little over the top. The more I think about it, it's not like I'm showing up in a belly-dancer's costume or an admiral's uniform, and I'm not in a pivotal role like the mother of the bride/groom.
What would you guys think?
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Rocky Mtn Saver
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Post by Rocky Mtn Saver on Oct 14, 2013 19:05:49 GMT -5
I'm not sure what your question is, I guess...
Black dress or navy suit? I think either would be fine. I'd opt for the LBD which you could easily accessorize upward.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Oct 14, 2013 19:07:50 GMT -5
I'd probably look at renting a dress for an occasion like this. There are web sties where you can rent designer duds for a special occasion for a fraction of the cost.
This seems like it would be a good time to try it out.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 19:11:24 GMT -5
I'm not sure what your question is, I guess... Black dress or navy suit? I think either would be fine. I'd opt for the LBD which you could easily accessorize upward. My question is whether I'd make a spectacle of myself showing up dressed (mostly) like the guys instead of like the ladies.
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plugginaway22
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Post by plugginaway22 on Oct 14, 2013 19:28:21 GMT -5
I definitely like the dress, not a suit! I am in 'wedding' years, that it, weddings of daughter and all her friends, and I have never seen a woman in a navy suit!
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 14, 2013 19:35:33 GMT -5
I wouldn't wear a navy suit. I mean - it would be fine, but it looks more like you are going to an audit than a wedding. I would wear the black dress.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Oct 14, 2013 19:35:48 GMT -5
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 14, 2013 19:36:31 GMT -5
Well - I take that back, I would buy something new - even if I only wear it once, because I like dressing up and I don't get to do it often, so I would seize that opportunity. But my advice to you is to wear the black dress.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Oct 14, 2013 19:38:57 GMT -5
Well - I take that back, I would buy something new - even if I only wear it once, because I like dressing up and I don't get to do it often, so I would seize that opportunity. But my advice to you is to wear the black dress. Yeah that!
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Oct 14, 2013 19:43:42 GMT -5
Don't wear a suit. You want to look fun and festive, not uptight.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 20:02:14 GMT -5
I wouldn't wear a navy suit. I mean - it would be fine, but it looks more like you are going to an audit than a wedding. I would wear the black dress. Yeah, but I'm a little unorthodox. I like it that way. I definitely like the dress, not a suit! I am in 'wedding' years, that it, weddings of daughter and all her friends, and I have never seen a woman in a navy suit! Which is one of the reasons I like the idea of wearing it! I've been on e-Bay just to see what's out there. Yawn. Half the stuff is black and looks like what I already own. Much of it is strapless or sleeveless and although I'm in good shape, my upper arms aren't that great. Spangles are tasteless (for this occasion) and although I've got great legs, I'm 60 and I have grey hair so sort skirts would look silly. And have I mentioned lately that I don't buy things made in China, which I'm sure is the origin of 99% of the merchandise I'm seeing? St. John Knits are still made in the US so they're a possibility. We're driving, not flying, so I can take the suit and the dress and make my mind up at the last minute, too.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Oct 14, 2013 20:03:39 GMT -5
Maybe you could wear your yellow jumpsuit? Now that's unorthodox!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 20:05:36 GMT -5
How feminine will you look in the suit? You need to look in style, not like you are making some kind of point. If it is a dressy suit, it has a defined waste and you look festive, ok. But you need to work harder to pull it off cause people are going to inspect you more than if you showed up in the standard, and expected, LBD.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Oct 14, 2013 20:07:56 GMT -5
Can you dance in a wool suit? I can't see getting freaky dressed like a CPA.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 20:08:53 GMT -5
Maybe you could wear your yellow jumpsuit? Now that's unorthodox! LOL- I forgot I'd mentioned that! Maybe the rehearsal dinner. laterbloomer, I think I'd look pretty feminine- I've got a short double-strand pearl necklace, a lot of different options of earrings, and will probably wear a heavy 22k gold ornate cuff bracelet I bought in India. And the cut of the suit is definitely a little curvier than a man's suit. Can you dance in a wool suit? I can't see getting freaky dressed like a CPA. DH isn't into the active dances- just the slower romantic type. I agree that you can't do the Chicken Dance in a suit but I doubt they'll do that one.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Oct 14, 2013 20:10:47 GMT -5
Maybe you could wear your yellow jumpsuit? Now that's unorthodox! LOL- I forgot I'd mentioned that! Maybe the rehearsal dinner. laterbloomer, I think I'd look pretty feminine- I've got a short double-strand pearl necklace, a lot of different options of earrings, and will probably wear a heavy 22k gold ornate cuff bracelet I bought in India. You'd look feminine in a Mrs. Doubtfire way. At least wear a fun blouse under it.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Oct 14, 2013 20:12:51 GMT -5
Can you dance in a wool suit? I can't see getting freaky dressed like a CPA. DH isn't into the active dances- just the slower romantic type. I agree that you can't do the Chicken Dance in a suit but I doubt they'll do that one. What does your husband have to do with it? Just go dance. And I won't do the chicken dance either. That's not fun, it's corny. Along withe the Macarena, the electric slide, and the locomotion.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 20:12:57 GMT -5
You'd look feminine in a Mrs. Doubtfire way. At least wear a fun blouse under it. Only if I accessorized it with foam boobs! A dressy blouse might be a good way to lighten the look.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Oct 14, 2013 20:16:05 GMT -5
Are you thinking about wearing the suit to get attention for being unorthodox?
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 14, 2013 20:21:19 GMT -5
Can you dance in a wool suit? I can't see getting freaky dressed like a CPA. Grrr...she will be dressed like an actuary, not a CPA! I hated wearing navy suits to audits, I sure wouldn't wear one to a wedding! Now that yellow jumpsuit on the other hand....
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justme
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Post by justme on Oct 14, 2013 20:22:12 GMT -5
I'm less anti-suit than I am anti-suit-that's-the-same-color-as-DHs-suit.
Maybe check out the rental places? I know of at least one that will send you out two sizes to try. It's not super cheap - when I looked most were still ~$100 or so for a rental - but it's cheap in comparison to the actual cost of the dress.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Oct 14, 2013 20:22:44 GMT -5
I'm not sure I've ever owned a navy blue suit.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 14, 2013 20:22:55 GMT -5
DH isn't into the active dances- just the slower romantic type. I agree that you can't do the Chicken Dance in a suit but I doubt they'll do that one. What does your husband have to do with it? Just go dance. And I won't do the chicken dance either. That's not fun, it's corny. Along withe the Macarena, the electric slide, and the locomotion. What?? Those dances are fun! Or maybe that is because they play them later, after everyone is drunk....
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Oct 14, 2013 20:25:19 GMT -5
Black dress not a suit.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 14, 2013 20:44:23 GMT -5
Not one person has supported your idea of wearing the suit.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 20:45:28 GMT -5
I'm trying but I just can't get there. I don't see how something you wear to get respect at work is going to look appropriate for a society wedding. "Cut a little curvier" than a man's suit isn't enough. The suits women wear to these things are not work suits. They are suits especially designed for special events. They are made of richer, more festive materials and cut a lot curvier than men's suits.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 14, 2013 20:55:22 GMT -5
Yes: No:
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Oct 14, 2013 21:06:14 GMT -5
Suites are for funerals (which work is just another form of BTW). Go for a new dress.
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quince
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Post by quince on Oct 14, 2013 21:10:12 GMT -5
Wear the suit. You have nice ones, you like the way you look and feel in them. Wear the suit. Wear what you feel best in- it's not like you're considering sweat pants and a t-shirt.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2013 21:13:18 GMT -5
Buy yourself a nice new dress for the occasion. Your posts indicate you can afford it, and it sounds like your wardrobe needs some, hmmm....investments.... You're right that I can afford it- but I can afford a lot of stuff I don't want to buy. A flashy dress made by slave labor in a country where basic human rights such as freedom of religion, aren't respected, isn't one of them.
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