Should I wear this to a wedding?

[Cookies Galore]

Oct 16, 2013 19:51:02 GMT -5 steph08 said:

Oct 16, 2013 9:48:59 GMT -5 michelyn8 said:

If it were me, I'd spring for a new dress/outfit to wear.  I bought a new dress for my sister's wedding, one for my 20th reunion, and a nice outfit for my aunt & uncle's 50th.  Out of those three outfits, I have only had occasion to wear the skirt I purchased for the anniversary function.  The top and the other two dresses are still in my closet and will most likely never be worn again since I no longer fit into the two dresses and the top is out of style.

When I think of someone wearing a suit to a dressy event, I think of something you'd have seen on Emily Gilmore.  I think a suit is fine as an idea, but I would definately steer clear of anything that resembled work wear.  The only other idea I can come up with if you're set on that option, is to maybe buy a really dressy top and wear that with the skirt of the suit, some strappy or at least dressy heels, and leave the jacket at home. 

Yes, an Emily Gilmore (grandma in Gilmore Girls) is exactly what I was thinking of.  Like the white suit she wore for the vow renewal.  But a plain work business suit would not be something I wore to a wedding, especially an evening, black tie optional wedding.

Lol, good ol' Emily Gilmore!

[Lizard Queen]

I would look for a LBD in navy to match your husband. (LBD refers to the style, as others have described.)

[Deleted]

Oct 16, 2013 20:06:38 GMT -5 Lizard Queen said:

I would look for a LBD in navy to match your husband. (LBD refers to the style, as others have described.)

Thanks, but I'm probably going to go for a splashy print or a bright jewel color!

[Deleted]

Oct 16, 2013 19:13:24 GMT -5 @justaposter said:

Athena did a nice dress traumatize you at some time? What is the hate on you have for fashion? (snip) You seem to have some really harsh judgements of people that like to look their best and are encouraging you to do the same.

Nothing wrong with wanting to look your best- that's one reason I do an hour of cardio every day and have done a competitive 35-mile bike ride each of the last 3 months. But maybe I should go blonde. And wear makeup. And get a facelift and weekly manicures and pedicures. And lift weights to tone up my arms. And get Botox on my frown lines.

Each of us has to make a decision in where to draw that line. There are a lot of things important to me in my life. How I look isn't always at the top of the list.

[Deleted]

Oct 16, 2013 20:38:24 GMT -5 @athena53 said:

Oct 16, 2013 19:13:24 GMT -5 @justaposter said:

Athena did a nice dress traumatize you at some time? What is the hate on you have for fashion? (snip) You seem to have some really harsh judgements of people that like to look their best and are encouraging you to do the same.

Nothing wrong with wanting to look your best- that's one reason I do an hour of cardio every day and have done a competitive 35-mile bike ride each of the last 3 months. But maybe I should go blonde. And wear makeup. And get a facelift and weekly manicures and pedicures. And lift weights to tone up my arms. And get Botox on my frown lines.

Each of us has to make a decision in where to draw that line. There are a lot of things important to me in my life. How I look isn't always at the top of the list.

Holy cow! We are talking about one dressy, modern outfit for black tie optional wedding. Why do you keep turning it into something it isn't? I don't think it is outrageous to suggest you buy your second dress in 30 years. That is a long way from getting invasive surgery. |And it doesn't take anything away from either your physical or career accomplishments.

[Deleted]

And would you mind curing me? Pretty please

[Opti]

I didn't post here earlier, but given the type of wedding it is, a new appropriate dress
would be my personal pick. I understand not wanting to buy something you
wouldn't wear again, but hopefully it wouldn't be necessary to do something like that.


You should go in whatever you can live with though, because if you are unhappy
with your outfit, it will color your experience of the wedding and who you talk to.
Hopefully it will work out just fine. Three or four years ago I went with a friend
to a wedding reception and given where it was located I did go dress shopping.
Didn't find anything I liked in my price range and ended up wearing my black and white
skirt with a dressy black sweater with gold thread in it. Turned out be a good choice
as we were seated with people with like minded interests and everyone was wearing
black and/or white.  

[Deleted]

Oct 16, 2013 17:35:36 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

I'd be self-conscious the entire time if I went to a fancy wedding and I wasn't dressed appropriately. I can do "different", but I can't do inappropriate for the occasion. My desire to march to my own beat has its limits.

Sometimes you just gotta get over it.  Let me tell you a story about the person who took the pic in my avatar.  She went to college and majored in something non-YM and she works as a receptionist at a nonprofit.  I take her to the Nutcracker every year or so as my guest.  It's not in her budget and DH isn't interested in seeing it- been there done that enough. 

Last year I was happy to find that this dress fit me again so I wore it.  When my friend showed up at our door her face fell- she'd worn slacks and a knit top- probably the type of thing she wore to work every day.  I could have changed and dressed down but I didn't.  I told her there would be artsy types in jeans and, sure enough, there were.  It was our first visit to this performing arts center and we enjoyed some wine and gawked like tourists at the city views and would have had a great time even without the ballet to follow but it was magical, as usual.  We had a great time.  What we were wearing didn't matter.

At this wedding we'll be celebrating a happy occasion (the young men among my nephews have been slow to marry and this one is marrying a wonderful young woman).  I'll be with family I don't always see, in beautiful surroundings with good food and drink.  I'm sure I'll look fine in whatever I choose (and I do plan to check out some of the "what not to wear" advice before renting anything) but, in the end, it's not all about the clothes.  Unless you show up in your PJs at work like in those nightmares everyone has on occasion.

[skubikky]

Oct 17, 2013 6:00:41 GMT -5 @athena53 said:

Oct 16, 2013 17:35:36 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

I'd be self-conscious the entire time if I went to a fancy wedding and I wasn't dressed appropriately. I can do "different", but I can't do inappropriate for the occasion. My desire to march to my own beat has its limits.

Sometimes you just gotta get over it.  Let me tell you a story about the person who took the pic in my avatar.  She went to college and majored in something non-YM and she works as a receptionist at a nonprofit.  I take her to the Nutcracker every year or so as my guest.  It's not in her budget and DH isn't interested in seeing it- been there done that enough. 

Last year I was happy to find that this dress fit me again so I wore it.  When my friend showed up at our door her face fell- she'd worn slacks and a knit top- probably the type of thing she wore to work every day.  I could have changed and dressed down but I didn't.  I told her there would be artsy types in jeans and, sure enough, there were.  It was our first visit to this performing arts center and we enjoyed some wine and gawked like tourists at the city views and would have had a great time even without the ballet to follow but it was magical, as usual.  We had a great time.  What we were wearing didn't matter.

At this wedding we'll be celebrating a happy occasion (the young men among my nephews have been slow to marry and this one is marrying a wonderful young woman).  I'll be with family I don't always see, in beautiful surroundings with good food and drink.  I'm sure I'll look fine in whatever I choose (and I do plan to check out some of the "what not to wear" advice before renting anything) but, in the end, it's not all about the clothes.  Unless you show up in your PJs at work like in those nightmares everyone has on occasion.

Then wear your suit and get on with it.    You're the one who asked the question.
I like the dress you have on in your avatar.   Looks fine....wear that.

[skubikky]

Oct 16, 2013 20:38:24 GMT -5 @athena53 said:

Oct 16, 2013 19:13:24 GMT -5 @justaposter said:

Athena did a nice dress traumatize you at some time? What is the hate on you have for fashion? (snip) You seem to have some really harsh judgements of people that like to look their best and are encouraging you to do the same.

Nothing wrong with wanting to look your best- that's one reason I do an hour of cardio every day and have done a competitive 35-mile bike ride each of the last 3 months. But maybe I should go blonde. And wear makeup. And get a facelift and weekly manicures and pedicures. And lift weights to tone up my arms. And get Botox on my frown lines.

Each of us has to make a decision in where to draw that line. There are a lot of things important to me in my life. How I look isn't always at the top of the list.

Exercising, eating right etc....takes good care of the inside.   
Looking at your picture, I would respectfully suggest that you try to colour your hair and use some make up. 

How one looks does give an initial impression.  IMHO, it's very telling in how one feels about themselves.  It's more pleasant to look at and interact with someone who has taken care with their appearance.  You've seem to be of the opinion that appearance, with regard to some of the extras(makeup, hair colour, ...even botox) isn't important...it can be.  And usually, at least for most women I know, if they feel pretty, it lifts their confidence.

[Cookies Galore]

Oct 17, 2013 0:00:18 GMT -5 @missmargarita said:

Oct 16, 2013 22:58:18 GMT -5 @tbird said:

Listen peeps, its either freshly sheered alpaca with mulberries or the navy suit.

Get over it.

When you say "mulberries", are you referring to the little pieces of poop that gets stuck to the alpaca's fur?

You're thinking of dingleberries.

[swamp]

Oct 16, 2013 20:38:24 GMT -5 @athena53 said:

Oct 16, 2013 19:13:24 GMT -5 @justaposter said:

. But maybe I should go blonde. And wear makeup. And get a facelift and weekly manicures and pedicures. And lift weights to tone up my arms. And get Botox on my frown linest line.

OMG, stop being a drama queen. You asked for advice. You got it. Nobody suggested you get plastic surgery. We suggested that you purchase an outfit made in this century.

[Deleted]

That dress plus the sash reminds me of something someone in an orchestra would wear to a performance. The cut reminds me of a dress I wore to a wedding when I was a freshman in HS. I wouldn't wear it these days because I am a 43 year old woman, not a 14 year old girl anymore.

I actually enjoy keeping up with fashion trends even if I do not buy new pieces every season. 

Besides, has Athena reached the age where she can do and say whatever she damn well pleases? Wear the dress or the pantsuit or whatever you want and accessorize with an "I don't give a damn" attitude! 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Have I wandered from YM to the Devil Wore Prada Board? What a bunch of fashion slaves


I'm about as far from Devil Wears Prada as you can get.  However I don't wear the same stuff I did when I was 18 even though I could totally still fit in it.


#1  I'm 30 years old, I don't want to look like a guest on an episode of Maury

#2 Even though it fits it is not compatiable with my current post kid body shape

#3 I'm now a young professional and I need to look the part.

Clothes send a message and I can control the message I want to send.   I don't want to send the message that I haven't bothered to look at clothes in 2002.   Styles have changed too much in 11 years for to think something from my teen years is still acceptable.

I don't get the pride in not owning anything younger than the 80's.  I don't get the pride in showing up to an event like you're talking about in that dress or a business suit.    You don't have to be a "fashion slave" to dress appropriate to the event, to your age and to the fact we're now in 2013 and not 1983.

 

[Deleted]

Oct 17, 2013 8:07:01 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I don't get the pride in not owning anything younger than the 80's.  I don't get the pride in showing up to an event like you're talking about in that dress or a business suit.    You don't have to be a "fashion slave" to dress appropriate to the event, to your age and to the fact we're now in 2013 and not 1983.

 

But it doesn't matter whether we "get" it or not. She's the one who's going to the wedding and she'll wear whatever she decides to wear.

What I don't understand is why people start "help me decide on an outfit" threads and then poo-poo the suggestions. If you've already made up your mind then why are you asking for suggestions?

[swamp]

What I don't understand is why people start "help me decide on an outfit" threads and then poo-poo the suggestions. If you've already made up your mind then why are you asking for suggestions?

The smug satisfaction that she is better than us "fashion slaves" because we have purchased clothing in the past 30 years? 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

If you've already made up your mind then why are you asking for suggestions

DH would say it's a trick question the answer is "You look smashing!"

I still haven't convinced him that when I ask him how I look I want an honest answer, I wouldn't be asking you if I was sure about the outift.

[Deleted]

But she's not the only one (I'm looking at you thyme4change ETA: and @justaposter. You did it too, didn't you? ).



Asking a question like that is going to give you a wide variety of looks (which I would hope is the point) and if you can't view them with an open mind then why bother even asking?!?  



There is nothing wrong with being comfortable with your "look". What irks me is when someone asks for my advice and then they shoot it down or ignore it. Save us both some time and just do what you want from the get-go.

[Deleted]

Oct 17, 2013 8:11:45 GMT -5 @beerwench said:

What I don't understand is why people start "help me decide on an outfit" threads and then pooh-pooh the suggestions. If you've already made up your mind then why are you asking for suggestions?

If you've toiled through all the posts, you should have noticed that I"m going to rent something up-to-the-minute (an idea that had never occurred to me) and I'm looking forward to it.

[Deleted]

<< crosses Athena off "The List"   >>

[Deleted]

Oct 17, 2013 8:17:50 GMT -5 @beerwench said:

But she's not the only one (I'm looking at you thyme4change ETA: and @justaposter. You did it too, didn't you? ).

I'm not sure what you are saying I did, but my instinct is to deny it.

[Deleted]

Smart lady!

You started a thread asking for fashion advice and then poo-pooed all the ideas that were given.

And even if you didn't, it does sound like something you'd do, doesn't it? 

[Deleted]

A lot of you ladies seem really sensitive about fashion  . . . and yet, not one of you has told Athena what the fashion Pantone color is for spring 2014  I think you need to take yourselves back to fashion 101.


Drama, comparing your teenage wardrobe to grown up mommy wardrobe isn't the same as the difference from 40s to 60s at all.
However since we are in these ridiculous fashion cycles, my High School clothing is actually back in style.  Wish I had kept any of it, but truly the 80s were a bad time for fashion and NONE of it should have come back!!!

Several pages ago Athena took up the rental suggestion and said she was going to do that.  Despite that, some of you have gone on harping about the dresses she ISN'T going to wear.  Who was it that kept having the kittens about putting your two cents in when you haven't read the whole thread

You are behaving like mean girls on the attack . . . over someone's clothing!?!?!?!  Is this really you?  Do you recognize yourselves?

[Deleted]

Saying that I don't like being used is being "mean"? 

ETA: From this point on I shall not post nor read any thread asking for fashion advice.  Problem solved! 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

comparing your teenage wardrobe to grown up mommy wardrobe isn't the same as the difference from 40s to 60s at all

I was born in 1983.  Teen years is as far as I can go back, obviously I wouldn't be wearing the same clothes I did in '83.


However since we are in these ridiculous fashion cycles, my High School clothing is actually back in style.

Not quite.  If I compare something truly from the 80's to something patterned on the style of the 80's today it won't be the exact same thing.   Depending on the piece we're talking about you might be able to pull off "vintage" but there are some things no matter how much you want to talk about the cylical nature of fashion won't ever be fashionable again.

Even classics over time change.  A black 1983 blazer will not be the same as a black 2013 blazer even though they're technically the same thing.

I don't really care what Athena wears, I objected to the implication that because I update my wardrobe that I'm a "Devil's Wear Prada" type.   There is a middle ground.  I don't get the pride at being on either end of the extreme.  I'd look just as ridiculous dressed in every current trend in 2014 just as I would wearing clothing I did back in HS.

[swamp]

Oct 17, 2013 8:49:25 GMT -5 @rockit said:

A lot of you ladies seem really sensitive about fashion  . . . and yet, not one of you has told Athena what the fashion Pantone color is for spring 2014  I think you need to take yourselves back to fashion 101.


Drama, comparing your teenage wardrobe to grown up mommy wardrobe isn't the same as the difference from 40s to 60s at all.
However since we are in these ridiculous fashion cycles, my High School clothing is actually back in style.  Wish I had kept any of it, but truly the 80s were a bad time for fashion and NONE of it should have come back!!!

Several pages ago Athena took up the rental suggestion and said she was going to do that.  Despite that, some of you have gone on harping about the dresses she ISN'T going to wear.  Who was it that kept having the kittens about putting your two cents in when you haven't read the whole thread

You are behaving like mean girls on the attack . . . over someone's clothing!?!?!?!  Is this really you?  Do you recognize yourselves?

I don't know what the fashion Pantone color is for 2014 and I don't care because I won't wear it if it doesn't look good on me.

What we're harping on is that she is keeping the potato sacky dress from 1983 and continuing to wear it when it really isn't that flattering on her. 

I'm glad she is renting a dress and will look her best for the wedding. 

[imawino]

Oct 17, 2013 8:49:25 GMT -5 @rockit said:

A lot of you ladies seem really sensitive about fashion  . . . and yet, not one of you has told Athena what the fashion Pantone color is for spring 2014  I think you need to take yourselves back to fashion 101.


Drama, comparing your teenage wardrobe to grown up mommy wardrobe isn't the same as the difference from 40s to 60s at all.
However since we are in these ridiculous fashion cycles, my High School clothing is actually back in style.  Wish I had kept any of it, but truly the 80s were a bad time for fashion and NONE of it should have come back!!!

Several pages ago Athena took up the rental suggestion and said she was going to do that.  Despite that, some of you have gone on harping about the dresses she ISN'T going to wear.  Who was it that kept having the kittens about putting your two cents in when you haven't read the whole thread

You are behaving like mean girls on the attack . . . over someone's clothing!?!?!?!  Is this really you?  Do you recognize yourselves?

Suggesting that a well-off, professional woman who appears to enjoy culture and the arts have one modern dress in her closet that she could pull out when when appropriate is NOT an attack. 

The fact that Athena chose to see that fairly innocuous suggestion and read it instead as people suggesting she get plastic surgery and become a vapid slave to fashion is on her, and no one else.

If you ask a question just so you can insult and belittle the people who give you an answer you don't like, you shouldn't be surprised when they get a little testy. 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Because I was challenged

 www.insideoutstyleblog.com/2013/09/colours-of-autumnwinter-2013.html

I'm excited about emerald because I've been looking EVERYWHERE for that shade of green after WNTW said it's a great color for someone with my skin tone and eye/hair color.  I love green but it's hard to find a shade that looks good on me.

I was surprised to find I already own a blazer in Koi and Carafe.   I called them orange blazer and brown blazer.  I'm trendy and didn't even know it.

[swamp]

Oct 17, 2013 9:23:30 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Because I was challenged

 www.insideoutstyleblog.com/2013/09/colours-of-autumnwinter-2013.html

I'm excited about emerald because I've been looking EVERYWHERE for that shade of green after WNTW said it's a great color for someone with my skin tone and eye/hair color.  I love green but it's hard to find a shade that looks good on me.

I was surprised to find I already own a blazer in Koi and Carafe.   I called them orange blazer and brown blazer.  I'm trendy and didn't even know it.

Woo Hoo!!!!   I look fantastic in emerald with my pale skin and dark hair, and it really brings out the green in my eyes.   Fashion slavery, here I come, at least this season. 

ETA:  I have a great emerald cocktail dress and i'd loan it to Athena, but I'm bigger than she is. 

ETA:  I also look great in the Acai, Vivacious, and Samba.  Not so good in the Koi, Carafe, and Deep LIchen. 

[imawino]

Oct 17, 2013 9:23:30 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Because I was challenged

 www.insideoutstyleblog.com/2013/09/colours-of-autumnwinter-2013.html

I'm excited about emerald because I've been looking EVERYWHERE for that shade of green after WNTW said it's a great color for someone with my skin tone and eye/hair color.  I love green but it's hard to find a shade that looks good on me.

I was surprised to find I already own a blazer in Koi and Carafe.   I called them orange blazer and brown blazer.  I'm trendy and didn't even know it.

I am loving Mykonos Blue and Acai!