NomoreDramaQ1015
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Posts: 48,110
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 19, 2017 14:21:17 GMT -5
They multi-task and get judged for answering emails when at the park or watching a game, which is marginally better than the judgement they'd get if they don't go to the game at all. I will never forget the day I picked ds up from preschool and his teacher said, "C look -- you have a MOM!" Yes, thank you. A very involved mom who just happens to work full time which is why I'm not around at 9:15am and 3:30pm. I wanted to slap her. "C look! Your pre-school teacher is a bitch!"  |
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swamp
Community Leader
THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 16:03:22 GMT -5
Posts: 45,622
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Post by swamp on Jun 19, 2017 15:04:25 GMT -5
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Deleted
Joined: Oct 15, 2024 5:28:23 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Jun 27, 2017 18:26:48 GMT -5
Couldn't find a parenting fails thread, so this will do...
Standing at the kitchen bar. C moves something and the large butchers knife hidden under it (?) clatters to the floor...
Me: Thank God that didn't land point down in my new Marmoleum.
C.: Or in the dog... who is laying right there... or in my foot, positioned right here...
Me: (after a pause)... yeah, whatever...
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swamp
Community Leader
THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 16:03:22 GMT -5
Posts: 45,622
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Post by swamp on Jun 27, 2017 20:22:43 GMT -5
I can tell you what's not expected: I'm involved with a matter where it appears mom has stolen over $500,000 for her daughters special needs trust over the course of a few years.  ETA. It's been a rough few days at work. A few very bad scenarios. Which makes me withdraw. Which means I don't interact with my kids. Making me feel more guilty. |
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Jaguar
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Fear does not stop death. It stops life.
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Post by Jaguar on Jun 27, 2017 20:32:05 GMT -5
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Post by empress of self-improvement on Jun 27, 2017 20:43:05 GMT -5
I can tell you what's not expected: I'm involved with a matter where it appears mom has stolen over $500,000 for her daughters special needs trust over the course of a few years. ETA. It's been a rough few days at work. A few very bad scenarios. Which makes me withdraw. Which means I don't interact with my kids. Making me feel more guilty. I'm sorry. There's a special level of hell for people like that. The same one where elder abusers reside. |
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Anne_in_VA
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 14:09:35 GMT -5
Posts: 5,549
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Post by Anne_in_VA on Jun 28, 2017 8:34:05 GMT -5
I'm so sorry you see this kind of thing Swamp. That is terrible. Those poor kids.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 28, 2017 9:32:53 GMT -5
ETA. It's been a rough few days at work. A few very bad scenarios. Which makes me withdraw. Which means I don't interact with my kids. Making me feel more guilty. Swamp, I think this is very normal...to withdraw when you are emotionally spent. I don't think it should make you feel guilty. Sometimes when I'm like that..I find small things to do with my kids. For me, it's playing games. A game of Boggle takes 3 minutes. Maybe 5 after you count up all the words. We have some card games that take like 5 minutes to play. Or, baking muffins (from a mix). There's very little that I really have to do. Even the peanut can manage everything but the measuring of liquids. We don't do it often (once or twice a month to break up the breakfast blahs.) But, again, it's something small and doesn't require a ton of me. So usually I can talk with the kids more. Do you do anything for mindfulness? That really might help you. |
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Chocolate Lover
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Joined: Dec 17, 2010 15:54:19 GMT -5
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jun 28, 2017 13:07:44 GMT -5
Couldn't find a parenting fails thread, so this will do... Standing at the kitchen bar. C moves something and the large butchers knife hidden under it (?) clatters to the floor... Me: Thank God that didn't land point down in my new Marmoleum. C.: Or in the dog... who is laying right there... or in my foot, positioned right here... Me: (after a pause)... yeah, whatever... My mom and her aunt are/were both bad about gesturing with knives. The large butcher knife type. We all learned real young to stay a little more than arm's length away when they were cutting things. |
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quince
Senior Member
Joined: Sept 23, 2011 17:51:12 GMT -5
Posts: 2,699
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Post by quince on Jun 28, 2017 21:25:15 GMT -5
Not liking people helps me not give a fuck.
My kids eat hot dogs and broccoli some nights. Sometimes they eat lovely home made chicken saag with rice, other times it's french fries and hummus. They eat a variety of foods. Good enough
They play with toys and with electronics. I played video games growing up and watched TV. So do they. They don't get overwhelmingly upset when anything is taken away, so good enough.
Eldest has a music class at daycare. We've thought about additional activities, but not a big deal. When he's school aged, we'll see. I think I did a little soccer in grade school and nothing else until high school. Again, nice if something works out, NBD if it doesn't.
Our school district wants all parents to volunteer. Too bad for them. Maybe we'll send something to an auction/fundraiser.
House isn't too hazardous. Laundry and dishes are clean. Floor gets vacuumed and stuff gets periodically picked up.
Our kids are lucky that smartphones have cameras, and even moreso that my parents live nearby, because their dad and I are not the picture takingest parents ever.
If I invite someone over, I do extra cleaning. If my husband does, he gets to do extra cleaning, or it won't get done. If someone wants to be critical they can just not get invited over again.
I admit, I do get briefly guilty that we're not GIVING OUR KIDS ALL THE OPPORTUNITIES AND ENRICHMENT EVER AND ADHERING TO ALL THE OPTIMAL PARENTING BEHAVIORS, but then I remember that they are happy and we are happy and imperfection is OK.
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Bob Ross
Junior Associate
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Post by Bob Ross on Jun 29, 2017 9:46:39 GMT -5
Archie's thread about his wife's anxiety stirred up some not so happy issues with me.
It seems like moms are held up to this impossibly high standard today.
Before the kids go to school, I'm supposed to supply them with all sorts of intellectually stimulating activities.
Now they are in school, I'm supposed to help them with their homework daily.
Feed them home cooked organic food and don't let them eat junk, fried stuff, hot dogs, processed foods.
Keep them enrolled in assorted activities. Which they should excel at. We can't have average children.
Have dinner as a family.
Make sure they have enough unstructured play time outside.
Make sure they are developing socially and have plenty of "friend" time with kids of like minded parents. We can't let them have screen time and junk food at a friends house. God forbid that parent smokes.
Supply Pinterest worthy homemade snacks and party favors at school functions.
Scrap book all memories.
While I'm doing this, my house is supposed to be clean, organized, and filled with Pinteresty decoractions I've made myself. All while I run a business, eat home cooked organic meals, exercise regularly, and maintain my figure. By being overweight, I'm setting a bad example for my kids.
I'm tired. My kids eat too much crap, don't play outside enough, and spend too much time playing video games and playing with their iPads. Who compares this stuff? Cashmere shoulder-sweater wearing soccer moms? Your only goal is to get your kids to age 18 without them getting killed or killing anyone. Anything else is a bonus. |
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