NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2017 12:40:53 GMT -5
FWIW, my 5 year started kindergarten not knowing how to read. She just finished Kindergarten and she can read in her expected grade level. My mom and I were talking about this. I am about ready to put my foot thru the screen if I see one more ABC mouse commercial. "Oh my daughter was 2 years old and had no interest math! I was so concerned that I took her to a specialist and he told me to subscribe to ABC mouse. Now she does alegbra problems for fun!" She's freaking two! Of course two year olds aren't interested in math. Talk about putting pressure on parents.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 12, 2017 12:48:11 GMT -5
Yeah, we don't need to speed up adulthood.
I know one of those Perfect Pinterest moms. Works full time, has 2 boys, and still has time to keep the house clean, do crafts, make healthy meals, have family time.... Uh, no ma'am - I do not have time for all that. If my kiddo is happy, healthy, clothed, fed, and stimulated, I'm happy. Activities would be good, but just a couple - IMO no kid under HS age should be booked every minute of the day.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Jun 12, 2017 12:50:14 GMT -5
I didn't even have my kid do his homework this year, except on a couple of days he stayed home kind of sick, but not too terribly sick. Teacher didn't require it to be turned in, so we just didn't bother with it. Somehow, he still magically learned to read and do math. It's good, because I didn't always understand the cryptic instructions in the homework.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 12, 2017 13:00:01 GMT -5
The peanut did not learn how to read in 4K. They just worked on letter recognition and sounds. I might try to a little bit with sight words with her over the summer.
I did work with DD1 on reading a little bit the summer between 4K and 5K. But, with a fall birthday, she was one of the oldest in the class..and at almost 6, she was ready to start working through the BOB books.
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Rob Base 2.0
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on Jun 12, 2017 13:05:02 GMT -5
You also forgot- "keep up with pop culture references so u can bond with kiddie" 😀
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dee27
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Post by dee27 on Jun 12, 2017 13:16:21 GMT -5
When the kids were young, life was a rat race. I centered on two things at home-making balanced meals and keeping the first floor of the house presentable. I closed the doors on the kids' rooms when they were messy and did not worry about the dust under the couch. If you work full time, something has to give, and if you are a mom, you are expected to be able to do it all by yourself. That is a myth!
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Jun 12, 2017 13:16:39 GMT -5
Whats also not helping me is having an overachieving son. The kid is in gifted math program at school and SOOOOOO driven he wants me to put him in math tutoring this summer. He will starting 7th grade this fall, has already covered all 7th grade common core curriculum last year while in 6th grade and some of 8th grade as well, and now does not want to "waste" his summer by doing nothing. His plan is to cover all of 8th grade math during summer by going to Kumon or some such place so he is ahead when school starts and can focus on 9th grade math. That kid tires me. Greatly. We have been holding off, primarily because we'll have to do the toting him around in a car. He got mad at me over the weekend because I don't see his POV. I do kiddo, I really do!! But....I am tired.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 12, 2017 13:20:17 GMT -5
Whats also not helping me is having an overachieving son. The kid is in gifted math program at school and SOOOOOO driven he wants me to put him in math tutoring this summer. He will starting 7th grade this fall, has already covered all 7th grade common core curriculum last year while in 6th grade and some of 8th grade as well, and now does not want to "waste" his summer by doing nothing. His plan is to cover all of 8th grade math during summer by going to Kumon or some such place so he is ahead when school starts and can focus on 9th grade math. That kid tires me. Greatly. We have been holding off, primarily because we'll have to do the toting him around in a car. He got mad at me over the weekend because I don't see his POV. I do kiddo, I really do!! But....I am tired. how will he stay awake in math classes this year? That's my fear regarding DS getting ahead. He has been playing on the 1st grade level on ABC Mouse for a while and he seems to enjoy it. He is very smart, but he's also a goofball with ADHD. He cannot get too far ahead or else he will be a troublemaker.
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janee
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Post by janee on Jun 12, 2017 13:29:31 GMT -5
I don't have kids, but I'll tell you about my childhood. I'm 59 so I'm sure some of you will relate:
1. We were told to play outside--not to come back in until lunch. I remember great times with neighborhood kids and sometimes just sitting out under a tree. 2. If we complained about being bored, we got chores (things my Mom was doing). You learned not say that! 3. We had weekly and daily chores. Had to be done before the fun things. If it wasn't up to standards, we did it again! 4. We watched TV (afternoon before dinner and Saturday mornings while our parents slept in a bit) 5. We all knew how to make our breakfast (cereal and milk) 6. We were expected to get up on our own before school, get dressed, etc. If we were late, it must be because we were "tired" so we went to bed an hour earlier that night. Didn't happen too many times!
I'm sure there are more I'm not remembering....
I wonder if we don't expect enough from today's kids? Mom's seem to do everything now. Although I do think kids have it tougher today, with less down time. Maybe there isn't time to do it the old ways.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2017 13:29:54 GMT -5
Gwen is way ahead of her class in terms of reading. We ran into an issue where she started becoming a class clown during sight word time because she had ALL the lists down. They had like 6 or 7 the kids needed to complete. She was done with all them half way into the year. I had a talk with her about just because she knows the material it does not mean she has the right to interrupt other people when they are trying to learn. I said if you find it boring that's fine but then sit there quietly and be bored. Don't distract other kids. I told her think of it as an exercise in patience. Mommy was the same way in school and guess what, this will not be the only time you are going to be waiting for other people to get it. Start practicing now. Her teacher ended up moving her and a couple other kids up to the 2nd grade sight word list to keep them occupied.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 12, 2017 13:31:01 GMT -5
I don't have kids, but I'll tell you about my childhood. I'm 59 so I'm sure some of you will relate:
1. We were told to play outside--not to come back in until lunch. I remember great times with neighborhood kids and sometimes just sitting out under a tree. 2. If we complained about being bored, we got chores (things my Mom was doing). You learned not say that! 3. We had weekly and daily chores. Had to be done before the fun things. If it wasn't up to standards, we did it again! 4. We watched TV (afternoon before dinner and Saturday mornings while our parents slept in a bit) 5. We all knew how to make our breakfast (cereal and milk) 6. We were expected to get up on our own before school, get dressed, etc. If we were late, it must be because we were "tired" so we went to bed an hour earlier that night. Didn't happen too many times!
all of that sounds VERY familiar to me.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Jun 12, 2017 13:32:54 GMT -5
Whats also not helping me is having an overachieving son. The kid is in gifted math program at school and SOOOOOO driven he wants me to put him in math tutoring this summer. He will starting 7th grade this fall, has already covered all 7th grade common core curriculum last year while in 6th grade and some of 8th grade as well, and now does not want to "waste" his summer by doing nothing. His plan is to cover all of 8th grade math during summer by going to Kumon or some such place so he is ahead when school starts and can focus on 9th grade math. That kid tires me. Greatly. We have been holding off, primarily because we'll have to do the toting him around in a car. He got mad at me over the weekend because I don't see his POV. I do kiddo, I really do!! But....I am tired. how will he stay awake in math classes this year? That's my fear regarding DS getting ahead. He has been playing on the 1st grade level on ABC Mouse for a while and he seems to enjoy it. He is very smart, but he's also a goofball with ADHD. He cannot get too far ahead or else he will be a troublemaker. He is in the gifted kids program at school. Which opens up the horizons a lot. Last school year, while he was in 6th grade he covered 7th grade math. Since he passed that relatively easily his teacher got him started on 8th grade math AND gave him more complicated problems to solve. So far he has had no time getting bored because his teacher keeps expanding the curriculum horizontally, or vertically, as she sees fit.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2017 13:35:25 GMT -5
I don't have kids, but I'll tell you about my childhood. I'm 59 so I'm sure some of you will relate:
1. We were told to play outside--not to come back in until lunch. I remember great times with neighborhood kids and sometimes just sitting out under a tree. 2. If we complained about being bored, we got chores (things my Mom was doing). You learned not say that! 3. We had weekly and daily chores. Had to be done before the fun things. If it wasn't up to standards, we did it again! 4. We watched TV (afternoon before dinner and Saturday mornings while our parents slept in a bit) 5. We all knew how to make our breakfast (cereal and milk) 6. We were expected to get up on our own before school, get dressed, etc. If we were late, it must be because we were "tired" so we went to bed an hour earlier that night. Didn't happen too many times!
I'm sure there are more I'm not remembering....
I wonder if we don't expect enough from today's kids? Mom's seem to do everything now. Although I do think kids have it tougher today, with less down time. Maybe there isn't time to do it the old ways. I swear my 6 year old is going to follow in his uncle's footsteps and be a lawyer. I use this one on him and he INSISTS he is getting to bed on time, but that he isn't sleeping property (he believes he's actually falling asleep somewhere around 5am) and that he shouldn't be punished for a sleep disorder. In fact, he feels he should probably stay up later because he feels he is not tired and just tosses and turn for the first 7 or 8 hours.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Jun 12, 2017 13:36:57 GMT -5
I struggle big time with a baby, toddler and preschooler. I have a somewhat demanding full-time job, but have huge guilt if my kids are stuck in daycare more than 9 house/day. So i take work home every night. Somehow I keep the house clean, laundry done, limit screen time and provide home cooked sit down dinners every evening. I exercise at 5 am. I am afraid if I let anything slide, everything will unravel. My low point this weekend was taking all 3 to my 5 year olds soccer game, my 3 year old had to poop and there were only port on potties. I had to take the baby with me of course and there was no easy way to help the three year old while holding the baby. I really wish I had more help then daycare. I try so hard, but when my kids get whiney, then I get whiney. I hate nagging and hate myself when I yell at them. Also I don't have the time or patience to work with my 5 year old on her reading, so she might end up starting kindergarten behind. Daycare wouldn't take my 1 year old this morning because she has a fever, but I don't have time to take a sick day. So I am trying to work from home and not fall behind. I would love to just take a sick day and not worry about work. Sigh, yes I am tired. All of this. Last week the baby wouldn't stop shitting, a pipe broke in our basement and it's my busiest time of the year. There were days I was just vibrating from stress, working from home waiting for repair people while trying to stop a baby who just kept shitting but didn't seem otherwise affected and was totally active and trying to be on conference calls or just feeling my phone vibrate every 20 seconds as I got email after email after email I couldn't keep up with. Just. Just can't.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 12, 2017 13:39:08 GMT -5
I wonder if we don't expect enough from today's kids? Mom's seem to do everything now. Although I do think kids have it tougher today, with less down time. Maybe there isn't time to do it the old ways. I think part of it is that SOME women only want things done their own particular way. And if it's not exactly the way they do it, it's "wrong." My mom was like that. It was never "Hey, thanks for folding the towels." It was "You didn't fold the towels exactly the right way. The fold is on the left, and it needs to be on the right. If you can't/won't do it right...then don't bother. You are not a help." Well, you only can guess how long dad and I actually helped. And you can only guess how well it was received. I know now, it wasn't about towels but control and perfectionism. I'm lucky in that I don't feel the need to be a perfectionist with everything. Just work and some crafty things. But, when you are a SAHM/W, I guess home caring tasks become part of your job description. I do wish that some parents would understand that you really can't control your kids, that the last time you get complete control with anything to do with the kid is the kid's conception. And even then, that's not always 100%.
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dee27
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Post by dee27 on Jun 12, 2017 13:41:55 GMT -5
What is it about moms and folding towels correctly? My mom was the same way. She hated housework and ironing so she taught her kids those chores.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jun 12, 2017 13:42:17 GMT -5
I was lucky in that my kids grew up in Florida in a neighborhood full of kids so they were outside all the time. That kept the house relatively clean except for their rooms. I was okay with that. I also had a work schedule that started early and ended before 4 pm so I had some extra time as opposed to moms who had to work until 5 or so. That extra hour made a huge difference. Since I worked I did hire a housekeeper and so every two weeks the house was clean. I also didn't have 4 kids under the age of 5. But kids that were 5 years apart in age. Plus they helped me in their own way. They thought it was fun to dust and empty wastebaskets and it helped between cleanings. We did eat at home mostly. But I did as easy as I could sometimes. I even cheated and got the Publix chicken meal to help myself out. I worked but my kids were easy and outside most of the time. I remember being shocked at the amount of toys that DH's grandson had and how his parents were always playing with and entertaining him. I never had to because they played and entertained themselves with other kids. I wondered if that would have been my life and my kids if we'd have stayed in Michigan. So glad we didn't.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 12, 2017 13:50:19 GMT -5
What is it about moms and folding towels correctly? My mom was the same way. She hated housework and ironing so she taught her kids those chores. It wasn't just towels. It was everything. I remember once feeling vindicated my first Thanksgiving during college. I was visiting home, and there was a big brouhaha over the fact that a measuring cup was left in the sugar bowl. We had to figure out who the culprit was so proper blame could put on the right person. Because they needed to be taught where the proper location was. I'm an only child. I took great delight that, day, saying "Don't look at me. I haven't been at home for the past 3 months!"
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alabamagal
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Post by alabamagal on Jun 12, 2017 13:52:01 GMT -5
It is funny when the "keeping up with" has absolutely nothing to do with the parents, but parents brag anyway.
First parent in daycare whose kid gets a tooth is always bragging, like the parent had anything to do with it. I had a friend who had a child very late getting teeth who just hated all the tooth talk.
"Wow your kid is big" is a compliment. If you're talking height, it is all genetic. as long as you are feeding them enough to grow properly. I have never heard a parent brag that their child was smallest in their group, it is always like making an excuse. My whole family is tall. It is not a brag, it is who we are.
My youngest was a very early reader. I was happy when he started reading early. But now that my kids are grown, I will tell you that my kid who started reading the latest (late K5) is the best at math, and he has the best adult job utilizing his math skills.
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emma1420
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Post by emma1420 on Jun 12, 2017 14:00:31 GMT -5
Whats also not helping me is having an overachieving son. The kid is in gifted math program at school and SOOOOOO driven he wants me to put him in math tutoring this summer. He will starting 7th grade this fall, has already covered all 7th grade common core curriculum last year while in 6th grade and some of 8th grade as well, and now does not want to "waste" his summer by doing nothing. His plan is to cover all of 8th grade math during summer by going to Kumon or some such place so he is ahead when school starts and can focus on 9th grade math. That kid tires me. Greatly. We have been holding off, primarily because we'll have to do the toting him around in a car. He got mad at me over the weekend because I don't see his POV. I do kiddo, I really do!! But....I am tired. My BFF has a similar issue. Her oldest two kids are classified as being profoundly gifted. The older of the two is 9 and is exceptionally driven. To the point where she's 9 and will be bused to the high school starting in the fall for math and the middle school for english (she's already skipped one grade -- which I know her parents were not thrilled at). She's just so motivated, and I know it wears them out. Hell, she's not even my kid and I get exhausted just listening to it all!
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2017 14:06:27 GMT -5
I got into it with the pediatrician because she keeps telling me Gwen and Abby will be short. In a tone that makes it sound like she's given me the news one of them have cancer. I got pissed off and told her that I am 5'0'' and DH is 5'3'' no shit our kids are going to be short you can stop telling me that.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2017 14:08:11 GMT -5
I know plenty of kids who don't read at 8 and are at grade level within 6 month a year. A few 11 year olds too. That isn't ti say it's bad to read earlier, but the expectations, the pressure. It's not only us it can be bad for...
Not pushing for unrealistic expectations isn't 'lazy'.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2017 14:12:11 GMT -5
Whats also not helping me is having an overachieving son. The kid is in gifted math program at school and SOOOOOO driven he wants me to put him in math tutoring this summer. He will starting 7th grade this fall, has already covered all 7th grade common core curriculum last year while in 6th grade and some of 8th grade as well, and now does not want to "waste" his summer by doing nothing. His plan is to cover all of 8th grade math during summer by going to Kumon or some such place so he is ahead when school starts and can focus on 9th grade math. That kid tires me. Greatly. We have been holding off, primarily because we'll have to do the toting him around in a car. He got mad at me over the weekend because I don't see his POV. I do kiddo, I really do!! But....I am tired. how will he stay awake in math classes this year? That's my fear regarding DS getting ahead. He has been playing on the 1st grade level on ABC Mouse for a while and he seems to enjoy it. He is very smart, but he's also a goofball with ADHD. He cannot get too far ahead or else he will be a troublemaker. He needs a program that keeps up with him. I'm glad to see so many reporting great accommodations!
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 12, 2017 14:15:44 GMT -5
how will he stay awake in math classes this year? That's my fear regarding DS getting ahead. He has been playing on the 1st grade level on ABC Mouse for a while and he seems to enjoy it. He is very smart, but he's also a goofball with ADHD. He cannot get too far ahead or else he will be a troublemaker. He needs a program that keeps up with him. I'm glad to see so many reporting great accommodations! I don't think our district has gifted until 2 or 3 grade.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Jun 12, 2017 14:19:33 GMT -5
He needs a program that keeps up with him. I'm glad to see so many reporting great accommodations! I don't think our district has gifted until 2 or 3 grade. Neither did ours. The testing happens in 3rd grade and the actual gifted program starts in grade 4. My kiddo just did the regular classes till he was in 3rd grade. He is a calm kid though, so he used to finish his work and then just sit and read in the class while other finished their work. Since your DS has ADHD, I am not sure how that can be handled.
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Jun 12, 2017 14:20:23 GMT -5
I live outside of town, I grew up in town with kids all over. I went out the door and found kids to play with. I have to drive them to see other kids.
I feel like my kids are missing out. I have to keep telling myself "different doesn't mean bad."
Further compounding my guilt, DD just learned to ride a bike last week. She's 9. She looks like she's 13. And then there was the field trip fiasco with DS. He does not pay attention. Brilliant, but all the smarts in the world won't help him pay attention.
Parenting is hard.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2017 14:21:06 GMT -5
That means he can already get differentiated instruction. You need to advocate that it should be in the form of challenging advancement!
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2017 14:28:21 GMT -5
There are no kids in our neighborhood anymore. I just don't have the energy to drive Gwen all over town for play dates.
Sometimes I worry she is missing out and then I see how popular she is at Kids & Co and at school. She's not lacking in socialization.
So I've decided home is where she needs to learn to be alone and not constantly entertained by others. That's not a bad life skill to learn.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Jun 12, 2017 14:30:01 GMT -5
I got into it with the pediatrician because she keeps telling me Gwen and Abby will be short. In a tone that makes it sound like she's given me the news one of them have cancer. I got pissed off and told her that I am 5'0'' and DH is 5'3'' no shit our kids are going to be short you can stop telling me that. We are 5'2 and 5'5? I think DH insists he is taller than that. DD is about 5'1 if that and DS is 5'5. I had hoped my kids would be taller than us, but no such luck.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jun 12, 2017 14:33:54 GMT -5
Whats also not helping me is having an overachieving son. The kid is in gifted math program at school and SOOOOOO driven he wants me to put him in math tutoring this summer. He will starting 7th grade this fall, has already covered all 7th grade common core curriculum last year while in 6th grade and some of 8th grade as well, and now does not want to "waste" his summer by doing nothing. His plan is to cover all of 8th grade math during summer by going to Kumon or some such place so he is ahead when school starts and can focus on 9th grade math. That kid tires me. Greatly. We have been holding off, primarily because we'll have to do the toting him around in a car. He got mad at me over the weekend because I don't see his POV. I do kiddo, I really do!! But....I am tired. Hi can't ride his bike there and back most days (maybe not every day, but most days over the summer) to make it easier? if he's that driven to go, i think he'd likely be reliable at getting there Have you tried setting him up with something online like Khan academy? If he's self motivated that might be all he needs instead of personal instruction.
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