Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 11:34:20 GMT -5
Marital rape wasn't considered a crime until the 1970s to the 1990s, so you wouldn't necessarily be allowed to stop having sex.
That being said, I expect the overwhelming majority of men would come to a compromise with their wife. My Mom didn't want kids at all and my Dad wanted a lot of them and they agreed on two. And there were still sodomy laws on the books until the early 2000's...that doesn't mean that men went to jail for gay sex.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 11:35:36 GMT -5
When you are married, aren't you both in control of how many children you have? I wanted three children but my ex didn't. I didn't get to have three. He only wanted one but I wanted more so he didn't exactly get to be in control, either. We compromised on two. So no, nothing would have changed for me living in 1950 as far as having children. And if your husband wanted a boatload of kids and you didn't but you weren't allowed to be on birth control? I wouldn't have married someone that I didn't agree with. Tehse are things to be discussed prior to marriage. Just like now.
I'm not saying that was right...but I also don't think a mother should get to abort a father's baby without his consent. We clearly will never agree on this!lol
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Post by Deleted on Aug 31, 2016 11:42:32 GMT -5
And if your husband wanted a boatload of kids and you didn't but you weren't allowed to be on birth control? I wouldn't have married someone that I didn't agree with. Tehse are things to be discussed prior to marriage. Just like now.
I'm not saying that was right...but I also don't think a mother should get to abort a father's baby without his consent. We clearly will never agree on this!lol
Like people are 100% upfront prior to marriage. Heck when my first ex and I got together neither one of us wanted kids. No way. No how. Twenty five years later, I have 2 and he has 3. All, very much wanted.
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justme
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Post by justme on Aug 31, 2016 11:49:04 GMT -5
Marital rape wasn't considered a crime until the 1970s to the 1990s, so you wouldn't necessarily be allowed to stop having sex.
That being said, I expect the overwhelming majority of men would come to a compromise with their wife. My Mom didn't want kids at all and my Dad wanted a lot of them and they agreed on two. And there were still sodomy laws on the books until the early 2000's...that doesn't mean that men went to jail for gay sex. Not exactly the same thing. With sodomy laws someone with knowledge of the consensual sex would have to report it for them to be charged. Until the laws were changed a husband could not legally be charged with raping his wife. Wife says no to sex, husband says yes and holds her down and hits her when she resists, wife goes to cops, cops sorry ma'am he's your husband legally he can take sex from your whenever he wants we suggest you ice where he hit you.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 12:03:50 GMT -5
I wouldn't have married someone that I didn't agree with. Tehse are things to be discussed prior to marriage. Just like now.
I'm not saying that was right...but I also don't think a mother should get to abort a father's baby without his consent. We clearly will never agree on this!lol
Like people are 100% upfront prior to marriage. Heck when my first ex and I got together neither one of us wanted kids. No way. No how. Twenty five years later, I have 2 and he has 3. All, very much wanted. I was very upfront with my ex and we were both very honest with each other. I'm sure people change their minds but realistically, if I wanted kids and my ex didn't I could very easily poke holes in his condoms or not take my pills. If he wanted kids and I didn't he could do something equally as sneaky.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 12:06:31 GMT -5
And there were still sodomy laws on the books until the early 2000's...that doesn't mean that men went to jail for gay sex. Not exactly the same thing. With sodomy laws someone with knowledge of the consensual sex would have to report it for them to be charged. Until the laws were changed a husband could not legally be charged with raping his wife. Wife says no to sex, husband says yes and holds her down and hits her when she resists, wife goes to cops, cops sorry ma'am he's your husband legally he can take sex from your whenever he wants we suggest you ice where he hit you. Then that would be one of the things I didn't like about that era. Like I told DQ, I'm not saying everything was perfect back then. I would hope I wouldn't have married an asshat that would have raped me but if something like htat happened, no, I would not liked that (obviously). But there are things in this era that I absolutely hate, too. There are good and bad in each era. A man in today's era probably wouldn't like htat his wife can abort his baby without his permission. Good and bad in each era
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Aug 31, 2016 12:07:41 GMT -5
but that still exists now without the institutionalized gender and racial discrimination. Nothing stopping people from embracing the other cultural norms and values of yesteryear. We have become a nation of "give me"....no more of the "ask bot what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country" it is all "government owes me". So no, I can't actually embrace the culture norms of yesteryear because we are turning more socialistic each and every year. I agree that that's what the country has become in some respects. But maybe the country has been treating some of its citizens in such a way where people stopped asking what they can do for it. But there is nothing stopping you personally from removing excess technology and luxuries from your life, being happy living on less, celebrating and re-creating a nuclear family (or as close as you can come to it), and being patriotic.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 12:11:53 GMT -5
We have become a nation of "give me"....no more of the "ask bot what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country" it is all "government owes me". So no, I can't actually embrace the culture norms of yesteryear because we are turning more socialistic each and every year. I agree that that's what the country has become in some respects. But maybe the country has been treating some of its citizens in such a way where people stopped asking what they can do for it. But there is nothing stopping you personally from removing excess technology and luxuries from your life, being happy living on less, celebrating and re-creating a nuclear family (or as close as you can come to it), and being patriotic. I am personally trying to live like that. I am personally trying to teach my kids personal responsibility. But I look around and see what our nation is turning into and it sickens me. People want handouts. People think they have the right to take from those who have busted their asses to earn what they have. Kids are no longer being taught respect for anyone or anything. And all we do is make excuses for them. So there are many things about this era that I do not like
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Post by Deleted on Aug 31, 2016 12:14:02 GMT -5
Like people are 100% upfront prior to marriage. Heck when my first ex and I got together neither one of us wanted kids. No way. No how. Twenty five years later, I have 2 and he has 3. All, very much wanted. I was very upfront with my ex and we were both very honest with each other. I'm sure people change their minds but realistically, if I wanted kids and my ex didn't I could very easily poke holes in his condoms or not take my pills. If he wanted kids and I didn't he could do something equally as sneaky. So, you are honestly ok with a woman having to ask her husband's permission to get birth control pills. I'm not talking about a couple discussing how many kids to have between themselves and being adults about it. I'm talking about your doctor not giving you a script unless your husband approves. I knew I was in deep shit in my marriage a couple years before I was divorced. I didn't know what I was going to do, if I was going to get out or if I wanted out. But one thing I did know was that there was no way I was going to bring another kid into the picture at that point. My husband was/is a devout Catholic. We're talking goes to mass several times a week...daily sometimes. If I would have had to get his permission for the IUD it never would have happened. As it was, he didn't even know.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 12:16:33 GMT -5
I was very upfront with my ex and we were both very honest with each other. I'm sure people change their minds but realistically, if I wanted kids and my ex didn't I could very easily poke holes in his condoms or not take my pills. If he wanted kids and I didn't he could do something equally as sneaky. So, you are honestly ok with a woman having to ask her husband's permission to get birth control pills. I'm not talking about a couple discussing how many kids to have between themselves and being adults about it. I'm talking about your doctor not giving you a script unless your husband approves. I knew I was in deep shit in my marriage a couple years before I was divorced. I didn't know what I was going to do, if I was going to get out or if I wanted out. But one thing I did know was that there was no way I was going to bring another kid into the picture at that point. My husband was/is a devout Catholic. We're talking goes to mass several times a week...daily sometimes. If I would have had to get his permission for the IUD it never would have happened. As it was, he didn't even know. Of course not. But I do think if a woman has to lie to her husband about taking birth control that the marriage is over and needs to get a divorce.
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Green Eyed Lady
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Post by Green Eyed Lady on Aug 31, 2016 12:18:06 GMT -5
The main thing I hate about this era is there is always a "reason" some people are entitled shits. The country doesn't treat them good, they had poor parents, they didn't get a pony that one Christmas, etc. I do yearn for the days people were responsible for their own behavior. I do not, however, want to wash my clothes on a board. Nobody is saying anytime is perfect. They may be saying a certain time is preferable. That doesn't mean they think it was perfect.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Aug 31, 2016 12:18:13 GMT -5
I agree that that's what the country has become in some respects. But maybe the country has been treating some of its citizens in such a way where people stopped asking what they can do for it. But there is nothing stopping you personally from removing excess technology and luxuries from your life, being happy living on less, celebrating and re-creating a nuclear family (or as close as you can come to it), and being patriotic. I am personally trying to live like that. I am personally trying to teach my kids personal responsibility. But I look around and see what our nation is turning into and it sickens me. People want handouts. People think they have the right to take from those who have busted their asses to earn what they have. Kids are no longer being taught respect for anyone or anything. And all we do is make excuses for them. So there are many things about this era that I do not like I see it too. I honestly believe things will start to get better with my generation's children. Your problem may be with the children of late Baby Boomers/Early Gen Xers who would be the current teens and 20 somethings.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 31, 2016 12:21:08 GMT -5
So, you are honestly ok with a woman having to ask her husband's permission to get birth control pills. I'm not talking about a couple discussing how many kids to have between themselves and being adults about it. I'm talking about your doctor not giving you a script unless your husband approves. I knew I was in deep shit in my marriage a couple years before I was divorced. I didn't know what I was going to do, if I was going to get out or if I wanted out. But one thing I did know was that there was no way I was going to bring another kid into the picture at that point. My husband was/is a devout Catholic. We're talking goes to mass several times a week...daily sometimes. If I would have had to get his permission for the IUD it never would have happened. As it was, he didn't even know. Of course not. But I do think if a woman has to lie to her husband about taking birth control that the marriage is over and needs to get a divorce. Not a lot of divorce in the 1950's.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 12:27:39 GMT -5
Of course not. But I do think if a woman has to lie to her husband about taking birth control that the marriage is over and needs to get a divorce. Not a lot of divorce in the 1950's. And the pill wasn't approved until 1960.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 12:30:33 GMT -5
I am personally trying to live like that. I am personally trying to teach my kids personal responsibility. But I look around and see what our nation is turning into and it sickens me. People want handouts. People think they have the right to take from those who have busted their asses to earn what they have. Kids are no longer being taught respect for anyone or anything. And all we do is make excuses for them. So there are many things about this era that I do not like I see it too. I honestly believe things will start to get better with my generation's children. Your problem may be with the children of late Baby Boomers/Early Gen Xers who would be the current teens and 20 somethings. Except it isn't just the teens or 20 somethings. Until we stop making excuses for able bodied people who can support themselves but choose not to, nothing will change. Everyone has a sob story but at some point we accept that the past is the past (whether it be a shitty childhood (me), how ancestors were treated or whatever) and change the future. So maybe that impacts some of the 20 somethings but it also impacts 30, 40 and older. And it is white, black and in between. That's what disgusts me about this era.
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justme
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Post by justme on Aug 31, 2016 12:40:41 GMT -5
Not exactly the same thing. With sodomy laws someone with knowledge of the consensual sex would have to report it for them to be charged. Until the laws were changed a husband could not legally be charged with raping his wife. Wife says no to sex, husband says yes and holds her down and hits her when she resists, wife goes to cops, cops sorry ma'am he's your husband legally he can take sex from your whenever he wants we suggest you ice where he hit you. Then that would be one of the things I didn't like about that era. Like I told DQ, I'm not saying everything was perfect back then. I would hope I wouldn't have married an asshat that would have raped me but if something like htat happened, no, I would not liked that (obviously). But there are things in this era that I absolutely hate, too. There are good and bad in each era. A man in today's era probably wouldn't like htat his wife can abort his baby without his permission. Good and bad in each era Trust me, wives were aborting their husbands children back then too. The main difference was that they had to pray that they lived after the procedure or that it didn't sterilize them (if they thought they might want kids at another time).
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Aug 31, 2016 12:53:33 GMT -5
I do know that my SAHM grew up to be an incredible adult once Dad divorced her after thirty years of marriage.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:09:19 GMT -5
Then that would be one of the things I didn't like about that era. Like I told DQ, I'm not saying everything was perfect back then. I would hope I wouldn't have married an asshat that would have raped me but if something like htat happened, no, I would not liked that (obviously). But there are things in this era that I absolutely hate, too. There are good and bad in each era. A man in today's era probably wouldn't like htat his wife can abort his baby without his permission. Good and bad in each era Trust me, wives were aborting their husbands children back then too. The main difference was that they had to pray that they lived after the procedure or that it didn't sterilize them (if they thought they might want kids at another time). If the man was staunchly pro-life, he might not have cared if the woman died during an abortion. If it were my child, I would want her dead...but that is neither here nor there. As I said in several posts before, there are things I like and didn't like from that time period. Abortion being illegal is not one of the things I didn't like.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:11:24 GMT -5
I do know that my SAHM grew up to be an incredible adult once Dad divorced her after thirty years of marriage. And that's awesome.
Nowhere am I trying to say that women would be better off if we weren't allowed to work. I'm saying that I like the simplicity of that era. I do not believe in letting a man control my financial destiny but that's because of who I am now. I do believe in a strong nuclear unit and I have a career for the money. I might be one of those women ok with not working and taking care of my house and children (back then because I wouldn't have known the risk). I have a very full life and don't need a career to feel valued. But that is also assuming I wasn't married to an asshole. Who knows
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Post by Deleted on Aug 31, 2016 13:15:44 GMT -5
I see it too. I honestly believe things will start to get better with my generation's children. Your problem may be with the children of late Baby Boomers/Early Gen Xers who would be the current teens and 20 somethings. Except it isn't just the teens or 20 somethings. Until we stop making excuses for able bodied people who can support themselves but choose not to, nothing will change. Everyone has a sob story but at some point we accept that the past is the past (whether it be a shitty childhood (me), how ancestors were treated or whatever) and change the future. So maybe that impacts some of the 20 somethings but it also impacts 30, 40 and older. And it is white, black and in between. That's what disgusts me about this era.
But hasn't that been going on for a long time? I'm 47 and remember a lot of welfare families from the early 70's. The need for the "projects" in our town has decreased significantly the past 20 years and they actually bulldozed down a bunch of the buildings. There's a lot of amazing, hardworking people too that are doing great things. Some of the kids at my son's school just floor me with all the drive and ambition they have at age 14 or 15. I feel pretty good knowing they'll be in charge someday.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Aug 31, 2016 13:24:02 GMT -5
... Nowhere am I trying to say that women would be better off if we weren't allowed to work. I'm saying that I like the simplicity of that era. ... The rigidity of gender roles was an integral part of that simplicity.
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ken a.k.a OMK
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Post by ken a.k.a OMK on Aug 31, 2016 13:24:26 GMT -5
I think there are more good and respectful people in our society then we see reported. The local news starts off with all the murders, shootings and violence. Mixed with weather 3 times and sports 3 times. It seems that bad news sells more then good news. One national network I watch ends their broadcast with a good story every night.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:24:57 GMT -5
Except it isn't just the teens or 20 somethings. Until we stop making excuses for able bodied people who can support themselves but choose not to, nothing will change. Everyone has a sob story but at some point we accept that the past is the past (whether it be a shitty childhood (me), how ancestors were treated or whatever) and change the future. So maybe that impacts some of the 20 somethings but it also impacts 30, 40 and older. And it is white, black and in between. That's what disgusts me about this era.
But hasn't that been going on for a long time? I'm 47 and remember a lot of welfare families from the early 70's. The need for the "projects" in our town has decreased significantly the past 20 years and they actually bulldozed down a bunch of the buildings. There's a lot of amazing, hardworking people too that are doing great things. Some of the kids at my son's school just floor me with all the drive and ambition they have at age 14 or 15. I feel pretty good knowing they'll be in charge someday. I don't remember turning on the tv and hearing "where is my Obama money" "why aren't the rich giving me stuff" and so on. I dont' remember all of the looting and burning down towns. And liberals want to make excuses for them instead of kicking them in the ass. I think that is what is missing now...a good, swift kick in the ass.
I am trying to work and type quickly so I don't think I'm expressing my views clearly. Everyone can need a hand up at any point...it is the generational expectation of handouts that has me shaking my head. It is everyone making excuses for this attitude that has me shaking my head. It is watching the news clips of tehse people that has me shaking my head. I just don't think that kind of thinking or behavior was excepted 40-50 years ago.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:27:19 GMT -5
I think there are more good and respectful people in our society then we see reported. The local news starts off with all the murders, shootings and violence. Mixed with weather 3 times and sports 3 times. It seems that bad news sells more then good news. One national network I watch ends their broadcast with a good story every night. wmbriggs.com/post/5969/
the chart is 6 years old but it actually surprised me. We are still far ahead of 1950 in terms of murders but we are much better than we were in 1990.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Aug 31, 2016 13:29:37 GMT -5
... I dont' remember all of the looting and burning down towns. ... The violence was a little different. For a time in the early 1950s, with its increasing numbers of African Americans, South Los Angeles became the site of significant racial violence. In the area south of Slauson Avenue, whites bombed or fired into houses and set crosses burning on the lawns of homes purchased by black families. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watts_riots
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ken a.k.a OMK
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They killed Kenny, the bastards.
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Post by ken a.k.a OMK on Aug 31, 2016 13:29:58 GMT -5
In 1988 my wife took a new job with a 50% raise. It put her salary above mine for the first time. Her mother asked me how I felt about that. I said "great because it's our money." Different generations. Her mother is 93 and we are 69.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:32:08 GMT -5
... I dont' remember all of the looting and burning down towns. ... The violence was a little different. For a time in the early 1950s, with its increasing numbers of African Americans, South Los Angeles became the site of significant racial violence. In the area south of Slauson Avenue, whites bombed or fired into houses and set crosses burning on the lawns of homes purchased by black families. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watts_riots I should have been clearer. I wasn't alive in the 1950 or 1960s. So when I say I don't remember all of the looting and burning down of towns, I'm speaking of my childhood. Now it could be that we didn't have 24 hours news coverage or social media.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 31, 2016 13:37:09 GMT -5
But hasn't that been going on for a long time? I'm 47 and remember a lot of welfare families from the early 70's. The need for the "projects" in our town has decreased significantly the past 20 years and they actually bulldozed down a bunch of the buildings. There's a lot of amazing, hardworking people too that are doing great things. Some of the kids at my son's school just floor me with all the drive and ambition they have at age 14 or 15. I feel pretty good knowing they'll be in charge someday. I don't remember turning on the tv and hearing "where is my Obama money" "why aren't the rich giving me stuff" and so on. I dont' remember all of the looting and burning down towns. And liberals want to make excuses for them instead of kicking them in the ass. I think that is what is missing now...a good, swift kick in the ass.
I am trying to work and type quickly so I don't think I'm expressing my views clearly. Everyone can need a hand up at any point...it is the generational expectation of handouts that has me shaking my head. It is everyone making excuses for this attitude that has me shaking my head. It is watching the news clips of tehse people that has me shaking my head. I just don't think that kind of thinking or behavior was excepted 40-50 years ago.
Turn off the 24 hour news channels. I don't even have cable. All they ever report on is the negative crap. I'm sure the poor were complaining about the rich back then too you just didn't watch it while eating your dinner. My parents talked about all the war protests and flag burnings. I think gang violence was worse in the past than it is now too.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:37:32 GMT -5
... I dont' remember all of the looting and burning down towns. ... The violence was a little different. For a time in the early 1950s, with its increasing numbers of African Americans, South Los Angeles became the site of significant racial violence. In the area south of Slauson Avenue, whites bombed or fired into houses and set crosses burning on the lawns of homes purchased by black families. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watts_riots Frye had been drinking, and was driving with his brother, Ronald, in the car, when the two were pulled over two blocks from their home. While Marquette was being arrested, Ronald retrieved their mother from her house. When Mrs. Frye saw her son being forcibly arrested, she fought with the arresting officers, tearing one officer’s shirt. An officer then struck Marquette’s head with his nightstick, and all three of the Fryes were arrested.
By the time the Fryes were arrested, hundreds of onlookers had been drawn to the scene. Anger and rumors spread quickly through the black community, and residents stoned cars and beat white people who entered the area. A neighborhood meeting called by the Los Angeles County Human Relations Commission the following day failed to quell the mounting tension, and that evening rioting resumed. Firemen attempting to put out blazes were shot at by residents, and looting was rampant. All day Friday the riots intensified, prompting the California lieutenant governor to call in the National Guard. By Saturday night a curfew had been set, and nearly 14,000 National Guard troops were patrolling a 46-mile area. By the time King arrived on Tuesday, having cut short his stay in Puerto Rico, the riots were largely over and the curfew was lifted. Fueling residual anger, however, police stormed a Nation of Islam mosque the next night, firing hundreds of rounds of ammunition into the building and wounding 19 men
After SCLC initiated its Chicago Campaign that fall, King asked an audience there: ‘‘What did Watts accomplish but the death of thirty-four Negroes and injury to thousands more? What did it profit the Negro to burn down the stores and factories in which he sought employment? The way of riots is not a way of progress, but a blind ally of death and destruction which wrecks its havoc hardest against the rioters themselves’’ (King, 12 March 1966).
kingencyclopedia.stanford.edu/encyclopedia/encyclopedia/enc_watts_rebellion_los_angeles_1965/
The watts riots were exactly the same as the riots today. A black man was beat by police and the black neighborhood reacted by beating whites and burning down their town. Unless I'm missing something?
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Aug 31, 2016 13:38:23 GMT -5
I don't remember turning on the tv and hearing "where is my Obama money" "why aren't the rich giving me stuff" and so on. I dont' remember all of the looting and burning down towns. And liberals want to make excuses for them instead of kicking them in the ass. I think that is what is missing now...a good, swift kick in the ass.
I am trying to work and type quickly so I don't think I'm expressing my views clearly. Everyone can need a hand up at any point...it is the generational expectation of handouts that has me shaking my head. It is everyone making excuses for this attitude that has me shaking my head. It is watching the news clips of tehse people that has me shaking my head. I just don't think that kind of thinking or behavior was excepted 40-50 years ago.
Turn off the 24 hour news channels. I don't even have cable. All they ever report on is the negative crap. I'm sure the poor were complaining about the rich back then too you just didn't watch it while eating your dinner. My parents talked about all the war protests and flag burnings. I think gang violence was worse in the past than it is now too. I actually don't watch tv!lol But I do scan the news on the internet each day.
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