Student blows through $90,000 inheritance; mad at her folks

[NancysSummerSip]

finance.yahoo.com/news/a-college-student-blows-inheritance-bert-show-205833329.html

Ninety grand in three years, and now no way to finish paying for school. And she's mad at her folks for not teaching her better. She's 22 years old, by the way:

...“I used it to budget for school clothes and college break money. I probably should have not done that. I took a trip to Europe. The Europe thing I thought was part of my education and that’s how I tried to justify that....”

“...[My parents] said there was nothing they could do for me. They’re not being honest with me saying they don't have [money] because my dad has worked for like a million years and they have a retirement account...”

Just wanted to get y'all's blood working a bit this morning. I'd think this was made up, but there is a link in the story where you can hear the actual interview.

[Cookies Galore]

Hahaha! I guess She Who Shall Not Be Named went back to school? ;-)

[Bonny]

Maybe we should send her this link:http://ymam.proboards.com/thread/46090/ways-make-extra-money

Oh wait, that might be embarrassing!

[emma1420]

Good for her parents for not bailing her out.  It's better for her to learn this now than later on in life.

She is an idiot, but so are a lot of kids her age who get stuff handed to them.  And some people get large sums of money and just blow it.  It's why so many lottery winners blow their winnings within a few years.  The money seems endless, and it's not.

[swasat]

I haven't clicked on the link, but where were the parents when she was blowing through the 90k??

There is hands off grown up kids and then there is HANDS OFF. How did they not come to know... Or maybe they knew and tried to stop her but she didn't listen?

Someone fill me in.

[TheHaitian]

I am concerned for my friend that just lost his dad, between his brother and him they are looking at seven figures each once the estate is settled.

They are both 26 and 28 and have expensive tastes.... I see them going through their inheritances like nobody business.

They are already careless with their own money...

[The Captain]

Jul 17, 2015 8:59:56 GMT -5 Bonny said:

Maybe we should send her this link:http://ymam.proboards.com/thread/46090/ways-make-extra-money

Oh wait, that might be embarrassing!

I started in the dish room and worked either in the cafeteria or snack bar all four years!

Sorry, didn't realize I was supposed to be embarrassed.

[Tiny]

I didn't listen to the interview...   atleast she's figured out how to use birth control  (as in there's usually some discipline involved OR some mild unpleasantness of going to a Doctor's office)   getting financial aid probably has some of the same steps - you find a number to call, you make an appointment, you GO to the appointment, you are told what choices are available, you make a choice, etc...   


I do wonder if it's a bit 'staged' - in the way of her attitude and general stupidity.      I can see where it would be pretty easy to use up 90k on 3 years of college - especially if you are using it for 'extras'.    She's only 20K short for her senior year... a loan or two would do it.    

I wouldn't necessarily be upset that she blew thru the 90K in 3 years - IF she "knew" what she wanted to be (you know one of those people who are driven to do X and they go after it unfailingly even if it takes years to get what they want), and had a plan in place to cover her last years expenses, and if what she wanted to 'be' was reasonable career choice - then maybe "blowing money" on trip to Europe and whatever else she used it for as she was working towards her degree, might have been a really nice 'gift' from her grandparents.     But, again, it all depends on her aims/plans/etc.    

Personally, I think the girl is a twit - and will probably carry a bunch of 'bitterness' until she dies about how she got 'screwed over' by her g-parents and then her parents  (and by the time she's on her deathbed there will probably be a long list of people/situations that 'screwed her over').   ::sigh::  

Maybe it's some form of low level mental illness?

[cael]

Yeah, the same low-level mental illness my MIL has - everything is always someone else's fault, and the world will always owe you.

[midjd]

I do wonder if it's a bit 'staged' - in the way of her attitude and general stupidity.

That was my first thought. It was a person calling in to a radio show with her voice disguised. How do they know it wasn't one of us pulling a prank? 

I suspect either the attitude or the situation (or both) were fabricated. Nothing like pandering to the the anti-Millenial crowd to get your page views (or listenership) up.

[souldoubt]

Jul 17, 2015 9:18:22 GMT -5 swasat said:

I haven't clicked on the link, but where were the parents when she was blowing through the 90k??

There is hands off grown up kids and then there is HANDS OFF. How did they not come to know... Or maybe they knew and tried to stop her but she didn't listen?

Someone fill me in.

The fund was set up for her by her grandparents and not in a trust that her parents oversaw.  As an adult the money was hers and I'm guessing her parents had no say or oversight in what happened with the money.  If anything they found out when she went to them with her hands held out telling them she blew through 90K largely due to going on spring break trips, to Europe and buying clothes.  

[imawino]

Jul 17, 2015 9:49:19 GMT -5 @tbird said:

Wait a minute - 90k in 3 years.... that is only 30k per year, so not a lot of money.

Did she manage to pay for her tuition and books and all that?

Not seeing a huge issue if that is the case. Of course she could have been more prudent, couldn't we all...especially at 22?

That was exactly my thought. I'm not sure that using terms like "squandered" and "blew through the money" are appropriate when she used her college fund to - wait for it - pay for college.

She appears to have covered her first three years with no loans, and now she might have to take a loan/get a job for senior year.  There really is no story to be had here.

[Shooby]

Well, I do put some blame on the parents. I wouldn't let my college student child blow through $90K of money, no way. If that was somehow beyond their control and they had no way to run interference on that inheritance, then maybe they couldn't stop her. However, there are ways to exert your influence over your own child and I would have stepped in and not allowed that to happen.

[Shooby]

It is your job as a parent to try to help your soon to be launched adult child to get on the right track. When my oldest graduated from HS, he was simply not college material. And, no way I was going to fork over and have him study some unemployable topic and/or flunk out with a bunch of loans hanging over his head. So, we investigated what was appropriate for him. He wound up working for a year at fast food and now is in a tech/trade school getting straight A's and really likes it. My younger son is going to be a Senior and we are "in negotiations" on what he wants to do and where he wants to go. He is a very good student. A 4 yr college is appropriate for him however, he isnt' free to go anywhere he pleases. We will look at programs and cost and weigh what he wants to study versus cost. And, out of state isn't likely to happen unless he can make a compelling case of why he would have to go to an out of state school. You don't just let stop parenting and let them flail around. Yes, sometimes you do have to step back. But, not to the tune of $90K.

[imawino]

Jul 17, 2015 10:14:26 GMT -5 Shooby said:

It is your job as a parent to try to help your soon to be launched adult child to get on the right track. When my oldest graduated from HS, he was simply not college material. And, no way I was going to fork over and have him study some unemployable topic and/or flunk out with a bunch of loans hanging over his head. So, we investigated what was appropriate for him. He wound up working for a year at fast food and now is in a tech/trade school getting straight A's and really likes it. My younger son is going to be a Senior and we are "in negotiations" on what he wants to do and where he wants to go. He is a very good student. A 4 yr college is appropriate for him however, he isnt' free to go anywhere he pleases. We will look at programs and cost and weigh what he wants to study versus cost. And, out of state isn't likely to happen unless he can make a compelling case of why he would have to go to an out of state school. You don't just let stop parenting and let them flail around. Yes, sometimes you do have to step back. But, not to the tune of $90K.

3 years of college completely paid for and needing to take out a loan and/or get a job for the last year is not the worst track to be on.

[Shooby]

No, it isn't. But, $90K at age 18 spent wisely, invested wisely and used wisely for a degree would have left her with a great nest egg and light years ahead of her peers. But, oh well, lol.

[tskeeter]

Jul 17, 2015 10:07:21 GMT -5 Shooby said:

Well, I do put some blame on the parents. I wouldn't let my college student child blow through $90K of money, no way. If that was somehow beyond their control and they had no way to run interference on that inheritance, then maybe they couldn't stop her. However, there are ways to exert your influence over your own child and I would have stepped in and not allowed that to happen.

Shooby, I think you give this kid too much credit for not being a willful, obstinate kid who insists on doing exactly the opposite of everything her parents have advised her to do.  One of my sisters is like that.  Yet.  At 50 years old.  I can see this kid telling her parents, "It's my money from Grandpa and Grandma and I can spend it any way I want.  Stay out of my business."  To me, the fact that the parents weren't willing to just hand over their retirement savings is an indication that they have some financial savvy and I suspect that they tried to guide their child.  But, some kids just won't be guided.  As a result, this kid is now paying tuition at the school of hard knocks.  Good for her Mom and Dad!  They are helping her learn lessons that should benefit her for the rest of her life.

[sesfw]

As a result, this kid is now paying tuition at the school of hard knocks. Good for her Mom and Dad!

I have a g-dtr like this.  At age 18 she said 'I'm an adult' and moved in with her boy friend and worked fast food with him.  She started college but didn't like the schedule so dropped out.  Then she entered University of Phoenix and tried to talk her unemployed parents into taking out loans to pay for it.  They said a resounding NO.  She totaled two vehicles and got mad when her parents wouldn't get her another one, although they did get a bike for her.

She graduated from UP, still living with BF, unemployed with a baby, and to her eyeballs in SL debt.  She won't tell me how much.  She is now 26.

I will say BF is gainfully employed and supporting his family.

The kid in the article is money stupid but getting smarter quickly.  Good for mom and dad.

[beergut]

Jul 17, 2015 9:22:17 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

I am concerned for my friend that just lost his dad, between his brother and him they are looking at seven figures each once the estate is settled.

They are both 26 and 28 and have expensive tastes.... I see them going through their inheritances like nobody business.

They are already careless with their own money...

How close are you to this friend? Would your friend take your advice seriously?

 I would tell him that many people who experience financial windfalls end up squandering it. I would also warn him to be aware of changing family dynamics and relationships with friends now that his financial status has changed. Show him this article

Ideally, if you get a windfall, you can take a small percentage of it and do something you've always wanted to do as a splurge. Ask him if there is a trip he's always wanted to take or a car he's always dreamed of buying (within reason, no need to drop $200k on a car), and tell him to go splurge on that. Get the 'need' to spend on something big out of his system by getting something he's always wanted.

Then, when he has come back from his trip, or bought his car, time to see a financial adviser about what to do to make sure the money lasts for the rest of his life and ensure his financial security.

[mojothehelpermonkey]

My brother inherited almost $200K when our dad passed away 10 years ago. Despite having a paid off house to live in this whole time, I am almost certain he is broke again. I found out last month that he doesn't even have insurance on the house he lives in that we own together . (He did agree to get insurance when I explained that he was putting me at risk too.)
At least some of the money was spent getting a degree in general studies, but right now he is working at a gas station.
Despite all of this, he is still a decent person who doesn't expect anyone else to pay for his mistakes.
Some people are just terrible with money, but as soon as this girl realized that she had blown through her college fund, she needed to accept responsibility and do whatever she could to get herself out of the mess she created. I hope she is at least getting a degree that will increase her earning potential.

[zibazinski]

 She had a great time and only needs to borrow for her last year. Big whooptie doo.

[giramomma]

Do we know for sure that the parents neglected to talk budgeting, etc with this girl, though?

My first two are interesting children.

DS is such a rule follower, does the right think kind of kid. Even when we talk about responsibilities, and what's mine versus his, it's a 30 second conversation if I think he's shirking his responsibilities. Then he looks sheepish, acknowledges me and moves on. He knows there's money for college, but came home earlier this summer telling him our neighbor that owns a small business would give him a job when the time came.

DD1 is a way different story. NOTHING is her fault. Even if we ask her 3 times to do something, and she doesn't and we get short, it's our fault because she didn't hear us or some such thing. If her sister starts screaming, DD1 of course, did nothing wrong, even if we just got done asking DD1 to give DD2 some space. This kid has got the potential to be a huge gas lighter.

Actually, DD1 starting crying when you would correct her when she turned a year, just hasn't stopped.

Same genetics. Same house; generally, same rules. The only thing I got is personality.

I suspect that if DD1 doesn't eventually start taking ownership for her behavior, she could end up quite a bit like the girl in the article. And, I'm sure when we put down our boundaries, DD1 will cry again. I'm just hoping we all live long enough to see her through the other side where she matures.

[973beachbum]

yeah my DD is head strong as well.  Short of me holding the purse strings and making her have to listen to me before the money goes out she would do whatever she felt was right.  We have had a few fights over money since she went to college.  She even sent me this long ass text about how she has to live with herself so has to stop doing what we want and please herself.  I was actually proud of myself.  I didn't get mad just asked so how are you going to pay your college tuition bill.

I keep hoping that she will grow out of it. 

[cktc]

She's lucky she blew through it. A trip to Europe and 1 year work history will get her a lot further when she graduates than 4 years of just school.

And while she is certainly a brat, her parents really don't seem to be providing much guidance.

[quince]

She's an adult. She's not a confused child.  The money was for her, and unless her parents actually held the purse strings, they could not have controlled how she used it. In my opinion, they should not try to control her.

It is NORMAL for adults who have something handed to them with no effort on their part to indulge and have issues when the well runs dry. It is something that some people 30 years old can't handle maturely.  She didn't burn through a pile of money and is now facing homelessness and an inability to pay for a critical surgery: she can handle this, even if it is more work than she would enjoy.

It is fine to learn the hard way that you might not get rescued from major inconvenience. There's no evidence that her parents wouldn't help if she had an actual problem other than getting smacked upside the head by reality.

[8 Bit WWBG]

Her parents should have taught her to crack the books from 5th grade on, so she could take enough APs to enter college as a second semester junior.  She could then take the rest of junior year at a bare bones community college for as cheap as possible, and ultimately transfer to a prestigious institution for her final semester so she gets a good name on her diploma.

Parental fail.

[cktc]

The parents were also extremely lucky to have their parents pay for their daughter’s college education. I don’t think it would have been too much for them to sit down with her and crunch some numbers to make sure it would be enough to last 4 years. Sure she is an adult now, but she was 18 when they sent her off to figure it out on her own.

A few spring breaks and a trip to Europe probably didn't add up to $20k. There likely would have been a shortfall either way, and broken up over 4 years it would have been much more manageable.

[Phoenix84]

I'm a bit skeptical of thats real, but if it is, I'm glad she's starting to "get it."

[busymom]

If I was her parent, I wouldn't give her another dime, either. It's time for her to grow up! And seriously, would any of you want to hire a 22-year-old who has never worked a job?

[quince]

Jul 17, 2015 14:33:02 GMT -5 busymom said:

If I was her parent, I wouldn't give her another dime, either. It's time for her to grow up! And seriously, would any of you want to hire a 22-year-old who has never worked a job?

I guess it depends. There are ways to show the ability to work without having held a job:  I don't think my husband had held a job until he graduated from college (5 years, math & comp sci degrees, definitely at least 22 by the time he graduated.), and he was able to be employed after graduating.  I think that is WHY you put school info on your resume if you're young and have little/no job history.  Someone could volunteer, organize extracurricular activities, manage a massive workload. Juggling math and science major courses while maintaining a high GPA/scholarship qualifications is something I would spot when looking at a resume of a recent grad.

THIS young lady? I probably wouldn't have hired her, but I didn't hire people for cafeteria/fast food/ entry level retail work.