Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 13, 2015 9:10:46 GMT -5
Those of you with long memories may remember that in late 2013 I asked here about wearing a pinstriped business suit to a family wedding instead of some frilly thing I'd wear only once. The response was overwhelmingly, "heck, no". There were also a few people who took issue with the alternative, a perfectly nice little black dress that showed its age (30+ years) only by the existence of padded shoulders.
We never made it to that wedding; USAirways kept delaying and delaying our flight and we finally gave up and told them to give us our money back and we'd got home.
Last weekend, however, we went to another family wedding and this time we drove, so we actually got there as planned. I finally decided after considering alternatives to wear my suit. It was part of a lot of good pieces I had made by a local tailor, not realizing I'd retire 4 years early so they'd get less use than anticipated. Fortunately, I can still wear most of the separates to church and other places where I have to look respectable.
So, here's the result. I had some shots that showed the whole suit but they weren't as flattering to my face. I felt well-dressed, no one stared, and I had a great time. I may do it again!
s300.photobucket.com/user/Athena531/library/
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on May 13, 2015 9:12:59 GMT -5
You clean up nice! I think it looks fine.
(Of course I've also been known to wear my business suits to a wedding so who am I to say).
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on May 13, 2015 9:21:15 GMT -5
Athena, you look good but I feel like you're the main character from She's All That - hot if she just put a little more effort in. Smh....
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 13, 2015 9:23:33 GMT -5
After you reach a certain age, Athena, you can wear whatever you think is appropriate. If the fashion police say anything, just send them to their rooms. You looked great!
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on May 13, 2015 9:32:55 GMT -5
I had no idea anyone actually dictated a dress code for wedding guests. I mean, don't show up in clothes that are ripped, dirty, or totally inappropriate (cutoffs, wife beater shirts, swimsuits, anything see-through), but otherwise, if it's suitably dressy for the occasion (or dressed down a bit for an outdoor event), then why do people care? It's the bride and groom's day, after all. How they look (and how the wedding party looks) is all that matters, right? I guess the exception would be if it's a black tie event, but the invitation would state that.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on May 13, 2015 9:36:20 GMT -5
I don't know. I did not have a summer casual beach themed wedding and some idiot showed up in a sundress that was totally inappropriate due to it being way too casual. She stuck out like a sore thumb. It would have been a lovely bathing suit cover up. So people can dress wrong for the event.
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milee
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Post by milee on May 13, 2015 9:42:02 GMT -5
I don't know. I did not have a summer casual beach themed wedding and some idiot showed up in a sundress that was totally inappropriate due to it being way too casual. She stuck out like a sore thumb. It would have been a lovely bathing suit cover up. So people can dress wrong for the event. When I was younger, stuff like that really bothered me. Now that I'm older not only don't I mind but I somewhat look forward to those loveable goofballs, since they can provide some spice to an otherwise boring event. It's fun not only to watch the reactions of people around them, but to have something interesting happening.
The older I get, the greater appreciation I have for random happenings. If this trend continues, it may get extreme enough that by the time I'm 70, I'll be the one showing up at a wedding in a bikini just to spark a little life to the party.
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on May 13, 2015 9:43:43 GMT -5
I had no idea anyone actually dictated a dress code for wedding guests. I mean, don't show up in clothes that are ripped, dirty, or totally inappropriate (cutoffs, wife beater shirts, swimsuits, anything see-through), but otherwise, if it's suitably dressy for the occasion (or dressed down a bit for an outdoor event), then why do people care? It's the bride and groom's day, after all. How they look (and how the wedding party looks) is all that matters, right? I guess the exception would be if it's a black tie event, but the invitation would state that. I thought the whole business suit/dress debacle was because the wedding was a black tie event at a posh country club or hotel or something like that.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on May 13, 2015 9:51:23 GMT -5
I had no idea anyone actually dictated a dress code for wedding guests. I mean, don't show up in clothes that are ripped, dirty, or totally inappropriate (cutoffs, wife beater shirts, swimsuits, anything see-through), but otherwise, if it's suitably dressy for the occasion (or dressed down a bit for an outdoor event), then why do people care? It's the bride and groom's day, after all. How they look (and how the wedding party looks) is all that matters, right? I guess the exception would be if it's a black tie event, but the invitation would state that. I thought the whole business suit/dress debacle was because the wedding was a black tie event at a posh country club or hotel or something like that. I don't remember the details of the invite in question, so you might be right. That said, I understand that not everyone can run out and buy an outfit for an event, given that 1) it's a budget thing, and 2) it's not something they would wear again. I must be getting old, or more tolerant, or something's in my water that's affecting me. I used to be a stickler for these things.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on May 13, 2015 9:52:57 GMT -5
That's why they make TJMaxx.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on May 13, 2015 9:59:49 GMT -5
and JCPenney, Macy's, Boscovs.....
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 13, 2015 10:01:05 GMT -5
Yay @athena53 I was on "Team Suit is Fine!" I totally remember that thread, wasn't it 3 pages of argument? I think suits are fine for weddings even if they are a little business-y.
My DD's wedding was not traditional, but I was a little aggravated with the people that showed up in jeans. It was like they couldn't be bothered to put one ounce of effort in!!
I have a bridesmaid dilemma that cropped up last night. Maybe I will post that to see if anyone has magic advice!
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lynnerself
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Post by lynnerself on May 13, 2015 10:36:02 GMT -5
DD's wedding is next summer. 4th of July wedding in a restored barn. But she is afraid the if she uses the word "casual", some of her fiancé's relatives will show up in their Carhartts
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msventoux
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Post by msventoux on May 13, 2015 10:41:01 GMT -5
A friend is having a similar worry about her wedding this summer. She's thinking 30% will be Carharts, 30% will be camo gear, 20% will be cutoffs or jeans and 20% will be dressed appropriately. I told her to have a winter wedding, but she said the majority would probably show up in snow gear.
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moon/Laura
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Post by moon/Laura on May 13, 2015 10:45:21 GMT -5
The son I gave up for adoption almost 25 yrs ago is getting married next may. I'm not in the wedding party, so do I have to wear a dress/skirt anyway? I'm so not a dress up person, and I'd prefer to wear nice slacks instead.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on May 13, 2015 10:50:39 GMT -5
What kind of wedding?
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moon/Laura
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Post by moon/Laura on May 13, 2015 10:57:18 GMT -5
he didn't specify, so I'm going with "normal", meaning neither black tie nor casual.
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lynnerself
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Post by lynnerself on May 13, 2015 11:06:32 GMT -5
A friend is having a similar worry about her wedding this summer. She's thinking 30% will be Carharts, 30% will be camo gear, 20% will be cutoffs or jeans and 20% will be dressed appropriately. I told her to have a winter wedding, but she said the majority would probably show up in snow gear. When we were touring the wedding venue, the owner said one bride actually had a Carhartt wedding, including a Carhartt dress. I'm not sure I can visualize that.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on May 13, 2015 11:11:02 GMT -5
I think very dressy slacks with a dressy top would be lovely.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on May 13, 2015 11:18:57 GMT -5
I'd have been more understanding of that but she was three years older than me.
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movingforward
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Post by movingforward on May 13, 2015 11:50:31 GMT -5
That's why they make TJMaxx. I bought a formal dress at Ross for $14 for a work function. I received numerous compliments.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on May 13, 2015 11:56:23 GMT -5
I have a wedding in June and I'll be wearing the same dress for the 4th time. I only bought the dress last spring, so it isn't a decade old or anything. But I'm all about the re-wear at this age when I'm in the hay day of wedding season. What is interesting is none of the guests have overlapped, so as far as anyone except DH is concerned, it's the first time I've worn it . Last summer - my cousin, his cousin, his college friend. This summer, his work friend.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 13, 2015 12:00:33 GMT -5
That's why they make TJMaxx. I bought a formal dress at Ross for $14 for a work function. I received numerous comments. I hope you meant compliments . . .
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movingforward
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Post by movingforward on May 13, 2015 12:03:31 GMT -5
I bought a formal dress at Ross for $14 for a work function. I received numerous comments. I hope you meant compliments . . . Yes, that is what I meant
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justme
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Post by justme on May 13, 2015 12:29:28 GMT -5
I have a wedding on the beach in June but the ceremony is at 7 with sit down dinner to follow. She used beach formal when I asked.
I'm good friends with her so she asked what I was thinking when I asked dress code. After back and forth she doesn't want anything close to tiffany blue because that's what her bridesmaids are wearing or light pink because it's too close to white. Then I had one labeled green but probably closer to a turquoise but she said on her phone it looks too close to bridesmaids.
I told her she was giving me slim pickings if she preferred light beachy colors! To which she replied with orange, dark yellow, or fusia. I just let the conversation change tacts after that. Lol
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on May 13, 2015 12:35:01 GMT -5
Are those high-waisted pants in the OP? I can't see very well. How else am I supposed to trash the decisions of a stranger if I can't see well?
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on May 13, 2015 12:36:57 GMT -5
That's why they make TJMaxx. I bought a formal dress at Ross for $14 for a work function. I received numerous compliments. Hell yeah! I bought my LBD for my fancy work party at a consignment shop. $68! I paired it with pearls (earrings, necklace, and bracelet) and I felt very Audrey Hepburn-ish.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 13, 2015 12:40:32 GMT -5
I thought the whole business suit/dress debacle was because the wedding was a black tie event at a posh country club or hotel or something like that. It was "black tie optional" and I'd say this recent wedding was only a step down from that. The men in the bridal party and the fathers of the bridal couple wore tuxes. Evening wedding with reception in the ballroom of a historic hotel- the kind with the sculpted, painted ceilings. My objections to buying a new dress wasn't a budget thing; I'm just picky. I don't want Made in China, I don't want cheap, flimsy fabric and sloppy tailoring. My upper arms are flabby so I shy away from sleeveless. The suit was made to measure, in the USA, of good-quality lightweight wool. It just made more sense to me to wear what I already owned and liked.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on May 13, 2015 12:42:13 GMT -5
Those of you with long memories may remember that in late 2013 I asked here about wearing a pinstriped business suit to a family wedding instead of some frilly thing I'd wear only once. The response was overwhelmingly, "heck, no". There were also a few people who took issue with the alternative, a perfectly nice little black dress that showed its age (30+ years) only by the existence of padded shoulders.
We never made it to that wedding; USAirways kept delaying and delaying our flight and we finally gave up and told them to give us our money back and we'd got home.
Last weekend, however, we went to another family wedding and this time we drove, so we actually got there as planned. I finally decided after considering alternatives to wear my suit. It was part of a lot of good pieces I had made by a local tailor, not realizing I'd retire 4 years early so they'd get less use than anticipated. Fortunately, I can still wear most of the separates to church and other places where I have to look respectable.
So, here's the result. I had some shots that showed the whole suit but they weren't as flattering to my face. I felt well-dressed, no one stared, and I had a great time. I may do it again!
s300.photobucket.com/user/Athena531/library/ actually, the objections to the "LBD" is that it was just a BD that looked like a potato sack. You have a nice figure. Show it off, don't cover it in frump.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on May 13, 2015 12:44:01 GMT -5
I looked at the picture.
The outfit looks fine, but kind of dowdy. And dark. It's a wedding, not a funeral. A shirt in a fun color/pattern instead of black with some funky jewelry instead of pearls would have made a world of difference.
You say you have a huge jewelry collection from your travels. Then why the pearls? Pearls certainly don't say "I'm here for the party."
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