KaraBoo
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Post by KaraBoo on May 14, 2015 13:30:46 GMT -5
Let him sleep in his clean clothes for the next day and quit worrying about wrinkles/what not. It doesn't matter in the long run and will make mornings less stressful for everyone involved.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 14, 2015 13:31:08 GMT -5
My SS, at 16 almost 17, is described EXACTLY like this. I have no solution for you at the moment. We just received SS's progress report for the 6 weeks from one class. He has a whopping grade of a 1. Yes, a 1. The only reason it isn't a zero is because he did one paper that he received a grade of a 20 on. I'm sorry I don't have any better news than this. It makes me sad that SS has made the choice he has. Sad, frustrated, angry...
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on May 14, 2015 13:32:36 GMT -5
If it's not every. stinking. time. it's probably not ODD, arguing is as natural as breathing to him. He even admits he knows he can't stop and doesn't know how. I'm trying hard to teach him to let things go but the concepts are so much harder than "put your shoes on". :/ I feel for you. I watch my friend go through it with her kid. It's not pleasant. It's not. And we're human and anything but consistent at the level he needs us to be. I can't battle every day about everything but there are some things I won't let slide, basic manners and respect type things. If your friend has any suggestions, like a book that was helpful, I'm all ears. It's kind of sad that you're glad the kid is smaller than you still so you can still win if you have to. I haven't had to pick him up and move him in ages but I still could if I had to.
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KaraBoo
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Post by KaraBoo on May 14, 2015 13:34:10 GMT -5
Also - for those who have kids that sleep so hard. I talked to our pediatrician about my youngest (13). She is a hard sleeper, but also has all the signs of sleep apnea. Her dad also has it. The Doctor said they are starting to acknowledge that kids may also suffer from sleep apnea earlier than initially realized. Something to consider.
Be aware though, since it's an emerging field, appointments are hard to come by. We have to wait 9 months for just an initial consult.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on May 14, 2015 13:34:47 GMT -5
Let him sleep in his clean clothes for the next day and quit worrying about wrinkles/what not. It doesn't matter in the long run and will make mornings less stressful for everyone involved. You beat me to it, DD is just as likely to sleep in jeans as she is jammies. She tends to not get dressed for the next day now, but she used to. She's my hard sleeper that doesn't want to get up. She has been getting up and getting herself out without prodding for a while now though. There is hope!
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Abby Normal
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Post by Abby Normal on May 14, 2015 14:40:53 GMT -5
I feel for you. I watch my friend go through it with her kid. It's not pleasant. It's not. And we're human and anything but consistent at the level he needs us to be. I can't battle every day about everything but there are some things I won't let slide, basic manners and respect type things. If your friend has any suggestions, like a book that was helpful, I'm all ears. It's kind of sad that you're glad the kid is smaller than you still so you can still win if you have to. I haven't had to pick him up and move him in ages but I still could if I had to. She said patience first. She always has to keep her temper in check and explain things calm and rationally. Which is hard when they are being irrational. In other words, don't pour gas on the fire. Be consistent and immediate in your response. Reward the behavior you want, and don't focus so much on the behavior you don't (focusing on the negative adds fuel). That's how she described it. She said that sometimes she can use surprise when Em gets really bad. They were up at the mountains and Em refused to put on her boots and exploded. My friend grabbed her out of the car and set her down barefoot in the snow. That shocked her out of it. Of course, someone who say it said they were going to report her to Child Services. The point being that sometimes, when her response is something completely unexpected, it will shock Em out of her tirade. She said the biggest thing is to diffuse "the bomb" as soon as possible before things escalate.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on May 14, 2015 14:45:21 GMT -5
It's not. And we're human and anything but consistent at the level he needs us to be. I can't battle every day about everything but there are some things I won't let slide, basic manners and respect type things. If your friend has any suggestions, like a book that was helpful, I'm all ears. It's kind of sad that you're glad the kid is smaller than you still so you can still win if you have to. I haven't had to pick him up and move him in ages but I still could if I had to. She said patience first. She always has to keep her temper in check and explain things calm and rationally. Which is hard when they are being irrational. In other words, don't pour gas on the fire. Be consistent and immediate in your response. Reward the behavior you want, and don't focus so much on the behavior you don't (focusing on the negative adds fuel). That's how she described it. She said that sometimes she can use surprise when Em gets really bad. They were up at the mountains and Em refused to put on her boots and exploded. My friend grabbed her out of the car and set her down barefoot in the snow. That shocked her out of it. Of course, someone who say it said they were going to report her to Child Services. The point being that sometimes, when her response is something completely unexpected, it will shock Em out of her tirade. She said the biggest thing is to diffuse "the bomb" as soon as possible before things escalate. I try that as much as possible, the patience. I keep asking who was it that prayed for me to have more patience, because I didn't! I've learned enough now, TYVM!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 14, 2015 15:27:48 GMT -5
It's not. And we're human and anything but consistent at the level he needs us to be. I can't battle every day about everything but there are some things I won't let slide, basic manners and respect type things. If your friend has any suggestions, like a book that was helpful, I'm all ears. It's kind of sad that you're glad the kid is smaller than you still so you can still win if you have to. I haven't had to pick him up and move him in ages but I still could if I had to. She said patience first. She always has to keep her temper in check and explain things calm and rationally. Which is hard when they are being irrational. In other words, don't pour gas on the fire. Be consistent and immediate in your response. Reward the behavior you want, and don't focus so much on the behavior you don't (focusing on the negative adds fuel). That's how she described it. She said that sometimes she can use surprise when Em gets really bad. They were up at the mountains and Em refused to put on her boots and exploded. My friend grabbed her out of the car and set her down barefoot in the snow. That shocked her out of it. Of course, someone who say it said they were going to report her to Child Services. The point being that sometimes, when her response is something completely unexpected, it will shock Em out of her tirade. She said the biggest thing is to diffuse "the bomb" as soon as possible before things escalate. Yeah, I need to work on this. My natural response is just throwing gas on the fire.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on May 14, 2015 15:42:43 GMT -5
Picking your battles works with all kids, not just the ODD ones.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on May 14, 2015 17:02:41 GMT -5
Let him sleep in his clean clothes for the next day and quit worrying about wrinkles/what not. It doesn't matter in the long run and will make mornings less stressful for everyone involved. I do this sometimes with DS2. This reminded of one time I overheard 2 girls talking - they were maybe 7 years old. One girl was explaining to the other that you just wear your pajamas OVER your clothes to go to bed. That way when you wake up all you have to do is take off your pajamas and you are dressed. I was trying to hard not to LOL at the kid logic.
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KaraBoo
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Post by KaraBoo on May 14, 2015 17:34:18 GMT -5
Let him sleep in his clean clothes for the next day and quit worrying about wrinkles/what not. It doesn't matter in the long run and will make mornings less stressful for everyone involved. I do this sometimes with DS2. This reminded of one time I overheard 2 girls talking - they were maybe 7 years old. One girl was explaining to the other that you just wear your pajamas OVER your clothes to go to bed. That way when you wake up all you have to do is take off your pajamas and you are dressed. I was trying to hard not to LOL at the kid logic. My 18 yr old STILL wears his clean cloths to bed for the next day. He doesn't see the logic in putting pajamas on after a shower just to turn around the next morning and put new clean cloths on. Probably not helping him get girlfriends, but I don't say anything cause it's just not worth it at this time.
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HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on May 14, 2015 17:46:21 GMT -5
I keep making his bedtime earlier, right now he gets 11 hours a night. He falls asleep within minutes of going down so it's not like he's screwing around in bed until 10. It's getting harder and harder to convince him now that it's bright sun at 7pm, but he still goes down pretty good. His room is kind of bright too because he has vaulted ceilings and one of those half moon windows above his window with no blind. I guess I could hang a heavy blanket up and not care what it looks like. My 3 yr old goes to 'sleep' after 9 PM (sometimes as late as 10) and is up at 6 am-6:30 am. Most days she does NOT nap. I DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE What is wrong with my offspring?!?!?!
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on May 14, 2015 18:05:12 GMT -5
None of my 3 children EVER, and I mean NEVER EVER slept in the car! We drove all the freaking way to Myrtle Beach and Outer Banks from PA when they were little and they did not take one single nap, not one wink!!!!
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on May 14, 2015 19:34:27 GMT -5
I keep making his bedtime earlier, right now he gets 11 hours a night. He falls asleep within minutes of going down so it's not like he's screwing around in bed until 10. It's getting harder and harder to convince him now that it's bright sun at 7pm, but he still goes down pretty good. His room is kind of bright too because he has vaulted ceilings and one of those half moon windows above his window with no blind. I guess I could hang a heavy blanket up and not care what it looks like. My 3 yr old goes to 'sleep' after 9 PM (sometimes as late as 10) and is up at 6 am-6:30 am. Most days she does NOT nap. I DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE What is wrong with my offspring?!?!?! We have the same kid, but mine does take naps most days.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 14, 2015 23:03:55 GMT -5
I keep making his bedtime earlier, right now he gets 11 hours a night. He falls asleep within minutes of going down so it's not like he's screwing around in bed until 10. It's getting harder and harder to convince him now that it's bright sun at 7pm, but he still goes down pretty good. His room is kind of bright too because he has vaulted ceilings and one of those half moon windows above his window with no blind. I guess I could hang a heavy blanket up and not care what it looks like. My 3 yr old goes to 'sleep' after 9 PM (sometimes as late as 10) and is up at 6 am-6:30 am. Most days she does NOT nap. I DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE What is wrong with my offspring?!?!?! That would be awful for me. My favorite time of day is between 8 and 11pm. After the kids go to bed and before I do.
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