finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 11, 2015 11:24:43 GMT -5
So very sorry to hear this. I believe Drama has a 2x4 that may come in handy while YMOT "explains" things to your former supervisor...and I've heard rumors that EE has a freezer More seriously, I think you absolutely have some legal options here if you want to pursue them. Definitely take some time to absorb things first--and we're always here as a sounding board. We're currently hiding bodies in Alaska while The Home 6 is still there so we can have plenty of frEEzer space when she gets back. I'm sure no one can find the supervisor in the frozen tundra This is just what I need - action! His bald head might be visible from satellite, however. Need to think burial. Such a bizarre and unpredictable thing - to be fired for giving notice that I need to take medical leave. So, I was promised pay through the end of this month, plus no contesting UI. Then I filed for FML and STD. The only problem I can see right now for UI, besides it being too little (only $435/week), is that I am not able to work right now. Readiness and ability to work are supposed to be criteria. Or is that not necessary? I'm still fumbling balls right now. - Charlie Brown
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 11, 2015 11:27:53 GMT -5
Naw, there's lots of boggy areas in Alaska too. We'll just make sure that The Home 6 knows about the requirement. We got your back on this part.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Feb 11, 2015 11:29:49 GMT -5
I'd probably contact your UI office about how unemployment works in your state. In Nebraska and Iowa I have to be applying for X amount of jobs. Then there are rules on when/if I need to take a job offer.
I do have the option of taking a part time job and still collecting UI as long as my hours don't exceed 25. You should see if that is an option then you would have some breathing room before diving into finding full time employment without having to worry about living solely on UI. Might also be worth calling your county Department of Health and Human Services. See if you can speak to someone about the fact you have depression and your situation. There may be assistance or they may have advice on what you need to concerning filing for unemployment.
Such a bizarre and unpredictable thing - to be fired for giving notice that I need to take medical leave
Unfortunately not really. If you read the barriers to women thread some people won't hire simply because statically speaking there are odds you'll need to utilize FMLA leave at one point.
Then Dh and I know people who got drummed out after asking for or utilizing FMLA. The company doesn't want to take the chance you'll need it again so they get rid of you. Iowa and Nebraska are "at will" states so it's pretty easy to create a reason for termination to cover their butts in case the employee figures out the real reason.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 11, 2015 11:37:55 GMT -5
finnime I think you should write down everything you can on how your job's been for the last 6 months or so - names, dates of meetings and topics covered (if you remember or have notes), including the last week -10 days. I'd do it in Word or the equivalent, personally. WE forget things as time passes and this way you have it documented.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 11, 2015 11:44:11 GMT -5
Might also be worth calling your county Department of Health and Human Services. See if you can speak to someone about the fact you have depression and your situation. There may be assistance or they may have advice on what you need to concerning filing for unemployment.
Such a bizarre and unpredictable thing - to be fired for giving notice that I need to take medical leave
Unfortunately not really. If you read the barriers to women thread some people won't hire simply because statically speaking there are odds you'll need to utilize FMLA leave at one point.
Then Dh and I know people who got drummed out after asking for or utilizing FMLA. The company doesn't want to take the chance you'll need it again so they get rid of you. Iowa and Nebraska are "at will" states so it's pretty easy to create a reason for termination to cover their butts in case the employee figures out the real reason. I will call DHHS for this area, NomoreDramaQ1015. That's a good idea. It never occurred to me that FMLA would be an issue. It's not really uncommon in healthcare to use it, although it may be for someone in the IT side. Well, I could not really have done differently. The truth is I can't work right now. I can type a few words, and pick up 3 out of 4 grocery items before realizing I'm wearing two different shoes, but work is beyond me just now.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Feb 11, 2015 11:48:58 GMT -5
There's no point in beating yourself up about it fin. It's your employer's problem that they felt the need to fire you instead of work with you, especially after four years of loyal service.
You were entitled to request it, and if you had documentation you would have been approved to use it. Don't beat yourself up for wanting to use a benefit that you are legally entitled to.
Yes I know that there are a hundred million billion reasons why from their perspective this was fair according to YM, but at the end of the day you're the one that has to live with the decision.
Take this as a lesson on how far EMPLOYER loyalty extends and apply it accordingly to future jobs.
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Feb 11, 2015 18:04:10 GMT -5
It's funny how "loyalty" only seems to extend from employee to employer but never in the reverse. You know who I am loyal too? My family, that's who. I will do what is best for my family, period. If that means staying at a job to do so or leaving for something then better, then that is my loyalty. And, yes my obligation to my employer is to show and do a hard and honest day's work. That is what I do. That is what you "owe" your employer, period. And, they only owe you to the extent that they pay you what they agreed to pay you to do so.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 11, 2015 19:27:39 GMT -5
finnime I think you should write down everything you can on how your job's been for the last 6 months or so - names, dates of meetings and topics covered (if you remember or have notes), including the last week -10 days. I'd do it in Word or the equivalent, personally. WE forget things as time passes and this way you have it documented. This is a good idea. It will matter.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Feb 11, 2015 20:56:49 GMT -5
finnime, I am so very sorry this happened to you. I can't believe the jerk sent you an email at midnight to set up the meeting. I've worked in both Colorado and Iowa and both are "at will" states. You can look the wrong way and be fired if they so desire. However, it sure sounds like your company has sat themselves up for a lawsuit. That is ridiculous.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Feb 11, 2015 21:19:35 GMT -5
I'm so sorry, finnime. That's a bunch of crap!
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 12, 2015 11:33:29 GMT -5
finnime, I am so very sorry this happened to you. I can't believe the jerk sent you an email at midnight to set up the meeting. I've worked in both Colorado and Iowa and both are "at will" states. You can look the wrong way and be fired if they so desire. However, it sure sounds like your company has sat themselves up for a lawsuit. That is ridiculous. I appreciate the support, TheOther. Still can't wrap my tiny little mind around this.
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CarolinaKat
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Post by CarolinaKat on Feb 12, 2015 14:56:58 GMT -5
finnime, I am so very sorry this happened to you. I can't believe the jerk sent you an email at midnight to set up the meeting. I've worked in both Colorado and Iowa and both are "at will" states. You can look the wrong way and be fired if they so desire. However, it sure sounds like your company has sat themselves up for a lawsuit. That is ridiculous. I appreciate the support, TheOther. Still can't wrap my tiny little exhausted and overworked mind around this. Fixed
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 13, 2015 10:15:08 GMT -5
Saw my shrink yesterday (and the day before - he's concerned.) He commented that, since I was officially on FMLA, intermittently, to care for my husband, it may be that the termination is not proper.
He also filled out the insurance form for STD. The insurance company did send it; my employing company did not send the FMLA forms because - I'm terminated! STD questions were interesting, but I am truly right now incapacitated. I cannot, except minimally, do work such as plan, organize, lead meetings; analyze, summarize, direct others; work to a deadline and budget. Funny how the black and white of this - its starkness - makes it a bit better. More clarity.
***
I described to my doctor imagining just letting my car coast down the hill, past the stop sign and into the divided local highway. Not if there was a car right in front of me; I just wouldn't look for anything oncoming. "Don't," he said. I really like my doctor.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Feb 13, 2015 10:21:14 GMT -5
He commented that, since I was officially on FMLA, intermittently, to care for my husband, it may be that the termination is not proper.
Do you still have your paperwork documenting you were approved for intermintent FMLA and that it falls within the time frame you were eliminated?
If you do put it in a safe place ASAP. That's a powerful piece of paper that can make things like getting STD and them to not contest your unemployment go in your favor.
It's all about who has the piece of paper. I learned that on Judge Judy.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 13, 2015 10:25:15 GMT -5
Saw my shrink yesterday (and the day before - he's concerned.) He commented that, since I was officially on FMLA, intermittently, to care for my husband, it may be that the termination is not proper. He also filled out the insurance form for STD. The insurance company did send it; my employing company did not send the FMLA forms because - I'm terminated! STD questions were interesting, but I am truly right now incapacitated. I cannot, except minimally, do work such as plan, organize, lead meetings; analyze, summarize, direct others; work to a deadline and budget. Funny how the black and white of this - its starkness - makes it a bit better. More clarity. *** I described to my doctor imagining just letting my car coast down the hill, past the stop sign and into the divided local highway. Not if there was a car right in front of me; I just wouldn't look for anything oncoming. "Don't," he said. I really like my doctor. Keep talking to him, esp. about that kind of imaging. When I first started with my therapist, I told her that I was really wondering why I/we were keeping the kids instead of sending them out to foster care/adoption (that and uncontrolled crying while driving were pretty much my cue to self to ask for help again.) And that as I sat by my son's bed, I could see how easy it would be to hold a pillow down. I wasn't going to do it but I could see just how easy it would be to get to there from where I was at the time. Just because we can SEE something doesn't mean we will do it. But telling a doctor or therapist is good. They can evaluate better/differently/something when they know more about what's going on with us.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 13, 2015 10:41:19 GMT -5
Wisconsin. I don't imagine actively doing something, but maybe not working too hard to not have something happen.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 13, 2015 10:49:23 GMT -5
Yeah. So keep letting your doctor know about it. You'll get past this. It takes time but eventually the light at the end of the tunnel isn't another train. It's actually a glimmer of light.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Feb 13, 2015 17:15:20 GMT -5
finnime I think you should write down everything you can on how your job's been for the last 6 months or so - names, dates of meetings and topics covered (if you remember or have notes), including the last week -10 days. I'd do it in Word or the equivalent, personally. WE forget things as time passes and this way you have it documented. This is a good idea. It will matter. Getting all of this down will also be cathartic for your emotional recovery. While documenting the nuts and bolts of everything, also have a separate document to write down your anger and rage. I call this emotional baggage from work-life a corporate hangover. And a document that has--I am really good at this and that to rebuild your self esteem. To show yourself that you are indeed functioning. I'll start. I can turn on my computer and type. I communicate clearly and concisely with my friends on YMAM, who are coming along side me in my struggle. Add any little thing even brushing your teeth and flossing. Combing your hair, fixing a meal. Set a goal that is very easy to meet like I will get my mail from the mail box by such and such a time. Then a harder one. I will be awake at such and such a time, showered and dressed for breakfast. And harder yet. Write the list of what I will contact DOL and set a day/time to log on. Blessing to you as you go through this. If we can prop you up further, we will.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Feb 13, 2015 22:13:09 GMT -5
I hope you get a good night's rest and awaken refreshed. Maybe a good self-spa day would be nice. Soaking bath, trim and file your nails maybe even polish them. Use special creams on your face and skin.
Enjoy your favorite breakfast and maybe coffee or tea. Relax and read through the magazines or books that have sat idle.
Appreciate your DH and other family members because it is Valentine's Day. They will bring blessings.
Peaceful, restful sleep, my friend. We'll look forward to your posts in the morning.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Feb 14, 2015 10:49:44 GMT -5
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 16, 2015 7:50:37 GMT -5
How are you doing today?
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 16, 2015 13:52:58 GMT -5
Jury's out, but - balance is . Called DoL; it's a holiday. I did shower and dress. Lots of nervous energy but can't pull it together, almost a week into my unemployment. My phone sends notifications of meetings I would normally be in. I did enjoy Fluffy Butt's family album, and the cute pictures from Artemis Windsong. I am still here. That's good. And talked with DS20 about the whole mess. He's a great DS. DH is having trouble seeing me troubled.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 16, 2015 13:56:22 GMT -5
Hugs. The DoL should be in tomorrow. Maybe you can take that nervous energy and delete the meetings from the phone?
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Feb 16, 2015 13:56:39 GMT -5
My phone sends notifications of meetings I would normally be in.
Is this a calendar on your phone? I'd delete it, if you can't bring yourself to face it have your DH delete all your appointments.
If it's a computer program thru your work then call HR/IT and notify them you need to be removed from the list.
No need to continuously be hammered with reminders you were blindsided and lost your job.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Feb 16, 2015 13:57:01 GMT -5
Jury's out, but - balance is . Called DoL; it's a holiday. I did shower and dress. Lots of nervous energy but can't pull it together, almost a week into my unemployment. My phone sends notifications of meetings I would normally be in.
I did enjoy Fluffy Butt's family album, and the cute pictures from Artemis Windsong. I am still here. That's good. And talked with DS20 about the whole mess. He's a great DS. DH is having trouble seeing me troubled. shut off the notifications.
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lurkyloo
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Post by lurkyloo on Feb 16, 2015 15:18:24 GMT -5
Can you go for a run? Housecleaning is also on the table...if yours is clean I'd be delighted to volunteer mine More seriously, I think physical exercise is a great way to burn nervous energy and get some endorphins going. Maybe get some sunlight and fresh air too.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Feb 16, 2015 17:05:53 GMT -5
Thanks for checking in . I was worried about you. Up and dressed is great. I know your DH is as concerned about all as you are. There is some recovery time as with any other shock.
Most people forget that today everything is closed except shopping. I did remember not to check the mail.
Did you have time to try out the 6 phase meditation? It's easy to think about those things. Our posting with recommendations is compassion for your struggle.
Have you tried out your self-spa? That is more self-care similar to wound licking but with a good outcome.
We care about you and want the best things coming your way. We will come along side to walk with you.
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Artemis Windsong
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The love in me salutes the love in you. M. Williamson
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Feb 16, 2015 17:08:36 GMT -5
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 16, 2015 22:33:01 GMT -5
Ok, notifications silenced. It's a good start.
My thinking has devolved into an ever-inward circle; I'm wholly unsure if I'll / when I'll get FMLA/STD for which I'm eligible as an employee. I was actually on FMLA when I was terminated, so everything is fuzzy. Looking through the next few weeks and several months is scary.
I thank you all for bearing with me.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Feb 17, 2015 16:15:09 GMT -5
Dept of Labor closed today, too - weather.
Depression ---> Work is problem; need medical leave ---> Told manager ---> Fired ---> Worse Depression ---> Work is problem ---> Work says no benefit, since fired; can't attest for UI that I'm able to work ---> Worse Depression since -> Work is problem
Kind of caught in loop here. Need to find lawyer, not sure how to do that. Or how to pay one. But! I think meds are kicking in some - maybe.
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