zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 8:43:00 GMT -5
Gone with the wind. Thankfully. I really don't need the added stress of them. It isnt like they'd actually help. But I'm sure they'd like to go through our stuff again. Only the ex did that though not bio.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Sept 6, 2014 9:27:47 GMT -5
<HUGS> Zib!
Definitely call a nursing service, & get some help. It's too much for one person to have to deal with.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 10:03:25 GMT -5
I'm sure it's a temporary thing but I need groceries and I need some other stuff. I've got to get out of this house and he needs to rest. I can't just let him sit in the car while I do stuff.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Sept 6, 2014 10:15:56 GMT -5
Is there no social network from which you could have someone stop by to "visit" and you take the "opportunity" to just run to the store? I am sure that DF would feel better about that situation than being babysat.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 10:24:19 GMT -5
I hate to ask someone to just sit in the house while he sleeps. It seems odd thing to ask anyone. People are happy to grocery shop for you but I want to pick out my own stuff. He can't eat fresh fruit or vegetable for another 4 weeks at least, stuff like that. I had to eat chicken rice soup for breakfast. Argh.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 10:27:26 GMT -5
He eats bacon and eggs. The thought of that makes me ill. So I need something lighter that I can eat. I need to see which has lower potassium and carb count. Raisin cinnamon toast or cinnamon toast for his French toast for lunch. Tonight our neighbor made him a special pizza that he can eat but I don't know if she made me something I could eat and I didn't want to ask. I'm dying for a salad, some fresh greens and all. I'm about to break the first rule of grocery shopping. Not when you're hungry!!
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Bonny
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Post by Bonny on Sept 6, 2014 10:31:14 GMT -5
You need "Respite" care so you get out of the house and time for yourself.
You need this or you will burn out.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 10:33:59 GMT -5
I know it. His doctor said I'd have all kinds of help when I got him home. Where the hell is it? Why aren't these places calling and setting up stuff? The nurses got to DF and he blew them off and I am so not happy about that.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Sept 6, 2014 10:39:29 GMT -5
I know it. His doctor said I'd have all kinds of help when I got him home. Where the hell is it? Why aren't these places calling and setting up stuff? The nurses got to DF and he blew them off and I am so not happy about that. Gosh knows what your DF told the visiting nurses. The first thing you need to do is call them and get them out there. They'll help you with others you might need to contact.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 11:31:25 GMT -5
I will steal his phone while he's sleeping.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Sept 6, 2014 14:34:58 GMT -5
FWIW, I don't see any consideration of what DF might be needing as a full grown adult male in a very difficult emotional situation.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Sept 6, 2014 14:43:17 GMT -5
I hate to ask someone to just sit in the house while he sleeps. It seems odd thing to ask anyone. People are happy to grocery shop for you but I want to pick out my own stuff. He can't eat fresh fruit or vegetable for another 4 weeks at least, stuff like that. I had to eat chicken rice soup for breakfast. Argh. Zib, I cannot recall DF's age, but if he is on Medicare, he is entitled to get a nurse assistant to help during the day, if he needs actual medical care. The may have given him the brushoff and told him he did not need their services, but this is not just about him; it's about you, too. Medicare and most health plans do cover the medical aspect of post-surgery, such as wound care, medication, physical therapy. But if he's not Medicare, or if he needs something more along the lines of personal assistance, such as bathing, that's different. Check his insurance policy to see if a nurse's aide or home health aide is covered. Neither type of assistance is 24/7, as far as I know. But you can at least catch a break.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 6, 2014 14:54:00 GMT -5
I think most people would gladly sit with him while you run to the store...
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Sept 6, 2014 15:08:13 GMT -5
I think most people would gladly sit with him while you run to the store... Is that in addition to the rest of the people who are breaking down the doors to help?
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Sept 6, 2014 15:21:47 GMT -5
They are actually crying outside the door. Good grief. So he's going to lay on the couch and let them cuddle in. The do tors appt just about did him in. But it has to be done. Zib, the cats being nearby may help some. Pets are supposed to lower our blood pressure and all. OK, maybe not all pets. Some of you with pets from hell will likely disagree. After I got out of the hospital each time, Gizzy lived on my lap 24/7. Somehow, he knew which hip not to step on. i did feel better with his weight on me, strange as it seems.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 16:07:14 GMT -5
Just turned 60. If I could get 4 hours twice a week, I can manage the rest of the time.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Sept 6, 2014 16:13:21 GMT -5
Just turned 60. If I could get 4 hours twice a week, I can manage the rest of the time. OK, so Medicare coverage is out. Check his insurance policy, then check with his doctor and the hospital social services to see who they use. And find a local transplant support group online. Transplant Living: transplantliving.org/community/support-groups/state-listing/florida/. You'll find folks who have been through the same things you are dealing with now. And some of them can probably help you find the assistance you are looking for, and give you recommendations on companies to avoid dealing with.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 16:15:54 GMT -5
Monday night is transplant support group and I will sure be asking then!
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Sept 6, 2014 16:24:18 GMT -5
Monday night is transplant support group and I will sure be asking then! Good. Pick everyone's brain, especially since DF, being a man , likely won't ask questions. Because, those are sort of like directions, yanno. And if any other transplants live nearby, consider a group respite, where one person does the looking-after for a bit while everyone else does their chores. You all make friends and get stuff done.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 6, 2014 16:25:13 GMT -5
Good plan.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Sept 6, 2014 19:50:25 GMT -5
I think most people would gladly sit with him while you run to the store... Is that in addition to the rest of the people who are breaking down the doors to help? I thought she was refering to services when she said there was no help... She mentioned she hated asking friends to just sit with him... I think friends would not mind...
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2014 7:43:51 GMT -5
True, I'm not sure they would but DF not so happy with that idea. I took something and went to bed early and judging by the mess in the kitchen, he ate a bunch of crap while I was asleep. So I'm through being the food police.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2014 15:15:09 GMT -5
But 17 days post transplant, he is walking with a walker and a fair distance.
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dannylion
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Post by dannylion on Sept 7, 2014 20:33:32 GMT -5
Zib, it might be that when he told the visiting nurses org they weren't needed that stopped the process of organizing home health assistance, which is probably arranged through a single organization. Depending on his needs, they would probably arrange for whatever was needed--nurses, CNAs, housekeepers, whatever. At least that's how Lutheran Home Health worked when I got them for my Dad. They were a big help. I hope you can get some in-home help organized so you can have a break once in a while.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2014 20:45:40 GMT -5
Ah ha! That may be the key to it all. I will find out tomorrow night
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 9, 2014 10:25:13 GMT -5
Well, we now have been told to inject DFs insulin 15 minutes before he eats so maybe that will help the crazy sugar spikes. Too low during the night, too high during the day. So much fun. Everyone at the transplant support group is a martyr so no one but THEM ever cared for their husband. Oh, boy.
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Sept 9, 2014 11:24:33 GMT -5
What is the name of insulin is he taking before meals. DH is on Novolog before meals and I give him a heads up about 10 minutes before dinner is ready. (I don't do breakfast or lunch). He takes Lantus in the morning and again around 9:30 PM
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Post by Deleted on Sept 9, 2014 11:29:09 GMT -5
Zib, the cats being nearby may help some. Pets are supposed to lower our blood pressure and all. OK, maybe not all pets. Some of you with pets from hell will likely disagree. After I got out of the hospital each time, Gizzy lived on my lap 24/7. Somehow, he knew which hip not to step on. i did feel better with his weight on me, strange as it seems.Not strange at all. I feel naked without Zeus lying on my legs at night. DH brings him in every night so I can get to sleep.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 9, 2014 16:11:40 GMT -5
Yup, same as your DH. The insulin. Well, I took him to the office and let them babysit him for a bit. I went to grocery store, Costco, and got my nails done, mani and pedi. Now I can face our 12 hour day tomorrow. Another biopsy followed by chest x ray and then EKG with follow up appt at 3:30 pm. I'm sure he will be out cold and not remember anything. Hope he's awake by 3:30 though. If not, it's rinse and repeat on Friday all over again. Feels like GROUNDHOG DAY.
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