Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 4:20:36 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on May 25, 2013 12:19:31 GMT -5
I have a lot of sympathy for you, naggie. It's easy to think we are functioning better than we are when we are surrounded by people who are doing even worse. But frankly you come across as extremely on edge, highly anxious, and unable to cope in a positive way. That's not bagging on you - it very much describes me at certain points in my life where my mental illness (depression, anxiety, PTSD) were not being addressed effectively. It's like you are living every day right at the edge and the smallest things can tip you over. Part of being healthy is building an emotional reserve, stepping back from the ledge, so that when you get pushed you aren't falling over.
To me it seems that you and your daughter are behaving in a very similar fashion - on edge, easily upset or angered, lashing out (either at yourself or someone else). We can pass both the genetic tendency towards mental illness but also the behaviors that accompany it (dysfunction, unhealthy interpersonal relations, lack of coping mechanisms) to our children. It's something to think about. If your daughter has a tendency towards depression it can also manifest at this age, especially considering the hormonal changes from pregnancy. Her baby daddy isn't the best catch but your daughter isn't a saint either - I imagine it would be difficult to live with her lashing out. Me and my ex went crazy, dysfunctional rounds because we could match each other in insanity.
Not sure if this has been mentioned yet but think of the airplane advice - put on your own oxygen mask first. You can't help anyone in the state you're in. And you need someone to help you. And it doesn't make you a bad person. And focusing on yourself for the next few months isn't going to doom your kid.
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whoisjohngalt
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 9,140
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Post by whoisjohngalt on May 28, 2013 8:44:47 GMT -5
The thing is that if OP is so over-emotional and dramatic, makes you wonder where daughter is suppose to be learning any kind of coping skills.
They should get away from each other and go to therapy or anger management or something COMPLETELY separately. - bc if one throws hissy fits about slammed fingers and another one wants to cut her wrists - they have major problems.
Bringing a baby in that kind of environment not only foolish, but dangerous.
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