Family ties/obligations?

[Deleted]

You cant file head of household unless you are legally separated or divorced. Also they would have to agree on who claims the kid, when they are divorced, it will/should be spelled out in the divorce decree.
Right now their best option would be filing married joint because if you file married separate then they either both have to itemize or both has to take the standard deduction (meaning cant deduct mortgage interest) and there are lots of deductions you cant take.

[Deleted]

Mar 9, 2013 9:32:46 GMT -5 8 Bit WWBG said:

I was going to ask: microwaved, restaurant, or home made?

Burritos can go either way I find.  Either reasonably healthy if filled with stewed beans and lean meat -- or ridiculously unhealthy if filled with sour cream and cheese.

I need to get back to cooking enough for leftovers.  I have a pound rib eye in the fridge that half will make it to lunch one time this week.  I finally bought some cold cuts too so I can make simple sandwiches.  $9/day lunches are not the path to wealth building.

Ours was :
- Mexican rice
- old El Paso seasoning : hot and spicy
- mild cheddar cheese
- ground beef
- peppers (red and green), onions
- wraps

We had enough wrap and cheese left over that she made herself a quesadilla for lunch.

So 5 burritos and 1 quesadilla.

[Deleted]

Mar 9, 2013 9:34:46 GMT -5 8 Bit WWBG said:

So does the cousin ever cook?  I remember you grilling one of the men in your circle who was complaining about the wife never being in the mood, but the guy never cooked, cleaned, helped with the kids, and hardly made any money.  I don't think that was this guy.

Hopefully the cousin does not get busy with the guy -- a 2nd kid in the mix would just be.... less than ideal at this time?

She does cook, she's been posting pictures all over Instagram and Facebook of her cooking.

And if she knows what is good for her she would cross him off for good, let some other idiot have another kid with him.

And no, that was a cousin on my side of the family.

[milee]

Mar 9, 2013 9:32:46 GMT -5 8 Bit WWBG said:

Burritos can go either way I find.  Either reasonably healthy if filled with stewed beans and lean meat -- or ridiculously unhealthy if filled with sour cream and cheese.

Healthy burrito idea.  Experiment with substituting fat free greek yogurt for the sour cream.  Yes, it's a little different, but similar enough that it gives the same creamy taste with a little tang.  Especially when mixed in a burrito, it's a reasonable substitute.  Not only is it fat free, but very high in protein with a little calcium as well. 

My family didn't like this at first, but I didn't give up and after they tried it 4-5 times, now they like it, so don't give up if at the first taste you think it's weird.  It's good, just not what you're used to.

[8 Bit WWBG]

Thats a good idea milee -- that and... "creeeeeem freeeeech" as the saying goes.  I'm sure by the time the other flavors of a burrito are added, one would scarcely notice.

I'd also be interested in doing that substitution blind.  Its amazing how much less perceptive some people are when they don't already know whats in there in the first place!  I bet half of them would never notice.

...:::"Right now their best option would be filing married joint because if you file married separate then they either both have to itemize or both has to take the standard deduction (meaning cant deduct mortgage interest) and there are lots of deductions you cant take.":::...

I'd imagine that for couples who hate each other (like where the father tells the mother "I hope something happens to you while you have the kid") playing fair is the last thing on their minds.  If I were in a similar position, I'd have my taxes done and ready to file the first possible moment.  I doubt the father is savvy enough to know, but even if he does, wouldn't he have to play catch up?

If that fails, change withholding to guarantee owing instead of receiving?

[Angel!]

Mar 9, 2013 9:40:39 GMT -5 @bunnysmom said:

You cant file head of household unless you are legally separated or divorced. Also they would have to agree on who claims the kid, when they are divorced, it will/should be spelled out in the divorce decree.
Right now their best option would be filing married joint because if you file married separate then they either both have to itemize or both has to take the standard deduction (meaning cant deduct mortgage interest) and there are lots of deductions you cant take.

Living apart for 6 months is enough to qualify for HOH. Regardless, you are right filing married would likely be their far best option since it sounds like he has no income. She won't lose deductions, gets an extra exemption, & would end up with a much lower tax rate.

[Mardi Gras Audrey]

On the tax front, it doesn't sound like he would have signed off on a MFJ return.  I hope any refund they got she isn't spending all of it.  I would bet part of it would be considered "his" when they complete the divorce paperwork.  She should hold some $$ in reserve for this but I am guessing that's not going to be happening...

[happyscooter]

I can't keep up.  Is this the same couple that got married a few years ago and had the huge expensive wedding that we saw pictures of?

[Deleted]

I didnt realize they lived apart for 6 months. It sounds like he had the kid a lot more overnights so then i believe she cant file HOH unless he lets her. But i dont know if he can file HOH without income.

[Deleted]

I don't know much but I know for sure they did not file married filing jointly. Heck they can barely be in the same room.

Yes they have been separated for longer than 6 months.

The guy had no income all of 2012 and only started working part time at Bloomingdales this year.

[Deleted]

Mar 10, 2013 6:57:26 GMT -5 happyscooter said:

I can't keep up.  Is this the same couple that got married a few years ago and had the huge expensive wedding that we saw pictures of?

No that is a cousin on my side of the family.

But this couple also had an expensive wedding, about 45k.

They are now separated and the mother is still making payments on the loan she took out for the wedding

[8 Bit WWBG]

...:::"Heck they can barely be in the same room... and only started working part time at Bloomingdales this year.":::...

Some other lucky girl will have to benefit from his employee discount

[zibazinski]

[Wisconsin Beth]

Mar 7, 2013 15:06:32 GMT -5 midjd said:

For whoever mentioned WIR and the fact that overspending is not necessarily indicative of bipolar disorder:

I spend very little time over there anymore but off the top of my head can think of at least 4 WIR posters who have admitted they have a dx of BPD. Overspending in itself doesn't necessarily mean you're bipolar, but it is a pretty big red flag. (Especially when six months ago the same person was spending all her days sitting vacantly on a park bench instead of going to work...)

Yeah, I was thinking of the park bench instead of working time too. 

Back to getting caught up. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Ok, Carl, it sounds like she's moving into a better place.  Where she CAN do something.  So encourage her via your wife to start making the small fixes.  Depression, in my personal experience, moves in ups and downs.  The trick is to figure out when you're on the up swing and make changes.  And warn people you're on the downswing (they'll probably know before you do thougg) and try to keep slogging though your routine.  Which is why the small changes when you're in a good place is important. 

I'm still on my happy meds (sertaline @100mg) and will see my therapist tomorrow.  My sessions are $140 for 1 hour.  Once I hit $500 in doctor/therapist visits, my copay kicks in and it drops to like $14 a visit.  And since I haven't been healthy since Oct, I'm basically there already.  So the cost of therapy depends on your insurance. 

And I think she needs to see someone.  And the exercise is releasing endorphins or something, so that may very well be making her feel better.  So she needs to be encouraged to make small changes/start thinking about the future - like getting out of the house.  She won't do anything now, but if she starts thinking about it, hopefully she'll pull the trigger sooner.  So soften up your list back on page 4 or 5 to 1 or 2 things and send it along. 

[Deleted]

They are now separated and the mother is still making payments on the loan she took out for the wedding [img src="http://images.proboards.com/new/shocked.gif" alt=" " src="http://images.proboards.com/v5/images/smiley/shocked.png"] [img src="http://images.proboards.com/new/shocked.gif" alt=" " src="http://images.proboards.com/v5/images/smiley/shocked.png"]