what are you doing right now?

[Deleted]

I am still not exercising the way I would like to. I’ve started thinking again about joining a local gym that’s not really just a gym. It’s a partnership or something with a charity, and it’s meant to be a sort of community presence I guess, because they also have some religious type things you can attend if you like. Those aren’t required, just offered. They also offer things like yoga classes, which I am also interested in. Overall the atmosphere is that it’s not just a gym. At least not what I imagine gyms to be like.

Several years ago, Mister and I went to take a tour, and I was really impressed by the facility. But it was out of the way to and from work, so I felt like I wouldn’t really use it because of that.

Since we moved though, it IS on the way home from work, but still about 20 minutes from home. 

I’ve been considering joining again lately because I HAVE to do something, and so far I’m not doing too well on my own. This place also has trainers, and I’m at the point now that if someone told me exactly what to do, it would be a big relief over trying to figure it out on my own. Even if I have to pay that “someone”.

There are at least 3 gyms that I can think of immediately, that are much closer to my home. They don’t have the atmosphere that is appealing to me about this place though.

I haven’t said anything to Mister about my renewed interest in this place. If I do decide to join, I’ll tell him then. If he decides to join too, awesome! If not, it will be something that I need to do for ME, regardless of what somebody else does or doesn’t do.

[Deleted]

After fixing breakfast, I did a bit of cleaning and went to Aldi for groceries. After our usual lunch at a wonderful little Chinese place, I went to FedEx and spent 1/2 hour copying all the documents the lawyer wants. It would have gone a lot quicker, but the top feed was being quirky and the auto-select paper size wasn't working so I had to put each sheet on the glass one by one. $15 for that joyful experience. I just spent another 20 minutes stapling the copies, plus re-stapling the originals and filing them away again. Oh well, it's done!

DH is cooking some plant-based burgers and making tomatoes Caprese for supper so I'm done for the day

[Deleted]

Jul 24, 2022 13:37:27 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I got my dad thinking he killed her then agonizing over if we made the right call.

Read the fucking room and don't throw out statistics. I was fine with his discussion of her condition and we're not under any delusions.

The number was salt in the wound. It wasn't needed. Have some damn compassion.

I guess everyone is different and maybe the best part is "read the room".  I "get" statistics and understand uncertainty.  I can evaluate the difference between a 10% chance of survival and a 90% chance of survival understanding that neither is a guarantee of a particular outcome.  They told us that chemo for DH's leukemia had a 3% chance of success.  We chose not to go for the 3%.

[Deleted]

Kiddo just told me again that his Mom says he can’t be outside for more than 10 minutes. He said the same thing yesterday. So I told him to go ask Mister if it was okay that he was still outside.

Mister seems irritated that I told Kiddo to ask him that. 

Ummmm, I’ve had more than enough child and baby momma drama. I’m not going to just take it upon myself to dismiss and go against what his children’s mothers have stated as law. I’m going to bring it to him instead, and let him make decisions and proceed according to what he says, so the mothers can’t blame me.

That is as far as rules strictly pertaining to the children. For issues that concern my household and how I run it, that is different, because I am the one and only Queen of my household.

[Artemis Windsong]

My GrS1 and GrGrS2 just left.  So good to see them and I had nice left over roast for them.  GrGrS2 will be heading back to WA state after his mother's family reunion.  The 3 of them are flying.  I'm sure this is the first flights for both GrGrS2 and his sister.  I do hope they have a good experience.

[Deleted]

I asked Mister if Kiddo was spending the night tonight, and he’s still saying Idk. 

So I had to help him out and remind him how I don’t like last minute shit, since if Kiddo stays tonight, I will be the person responsible for him tomorrow.

I feel like I should nip shit in the bud and make it clear that I won’t cooperate with last minute stuff that is not an emergency and could have been sorted out ahead of time.

If he hasn’t said anything and Kiddo is still here when Mister goes to bed, I am going to say to Mister that he must plan on taking Kiddo to work with him in the morning.

[Deleted]

Jul 24, 2022 16:00:30 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

Kiddo just told me again that his Mom says he can’t be outside for more than 10 minutes. He said the same thing yesterday. So I told him to go ask Mister if it was okay that he was still outside.

Mister seems irritated that I told Kiddo to ask him that. 

Ummmm, I’ve had more than enough child and baby momma drama. I’m not going to just take it upon myself to dismiss and go against what his children’s mothers have stated as law. I’m going to bring it to him instead, and let him make decisions and proceed according to what he says, so the mothers can’t blame me.

That is as far as rules strictly pertaining to the children. For issues that concern my household and how I run it, that is different, because I am the one and only Queen of my household.

Does Kiddo have any genuine health issues related to outside exposure that you know of?  Pollen allergies, asthma, heart condition making him unusually vulnerable to overheating, sun related skin issues?  If he does, his mother should have provided Mister and you with clear info on the health issue and how to respond to it.  FWIW, it sounds like momma drama that she's used to instill fearfulness into the poor guy and manipulate others.  Just saying

[Deleted]

Jul 24, 2022 17:11:47 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Whine whine. I'll delete later.

SPOILER: Click to show

I really don't want to call up my mom. But, I should. She's been escalating since the 4th of July.

Will calling her reverse the escalation?  Or help you be in a better place?  Just thoughts and whine on as needed 

[minnesotapaintlady]

omg.  I usually just hang up on these stupid survey calls or just don't pick up numbers I don't know, but decided to just answer the damn questions this time and it went on for-EVER.  

It was also completely obvious what "side" was doing this survey and I found it very annoying for some reason.  Plus, they wouldn't let me answer things how I wanted.  

"Do you consider yourself a democrat or a republican"?

"Neither"

"Please, just answer one of the other.  Do you consider yourself a democrat or a republican?".

"I don't know what to tell you lady, I don't consider myself either of them."

[Deleted]

Back from a bike ride. Rain is coming in and the cloud cover made a huge difference. I'd planned on going 10 miles and did 12 instead and I feel good.

Another thought on DramaQ's mother's doctors: we all want compassion and competence in our doctors. Some just don't have both. When I was in HS I read a memoir by the Mayo brothers and they made the observation the that docs who are so good that other docs go to them but who lack bedside manner are the ones who get sued. The friendly but bumbling doc who delivered everybody in town and played golf with their Dad but missed a diagnosis till it was too late or was unsuccessful with a procedure a more competent doc could have done better doesn't get sued because he's such a nice guy. It sounds like Dr. Doom is extremely competent and Mom needs all the competence she can get in her corner.

And Dr. Doom may have erred on the side of caution and gathered the family just in case it was Mom's last hours because she wanted them to have the opportunity if the worst happened.  

Drama, please keep us posted and take care of yourself while you're trying to keep your family together.

[debthaven]

countrygirl2 I'm very sorry about your DH's mom. You took wonderful care of her. 

NomoreDramaQ1015 I am so sorry you're going through this. I fervently hope your mom surprises all of you. 

[Opti]

Jul 24, 2022 16:00:30 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

Kiddo just told me again that his Mom says he can’t be outside for more than 10 minutes. He said the same thing yesterday. So I told him to go ask Mister if it was okay that he was still outside.

Mister seems irritated that I told Kiddo to ask him that. 

Ummmm, I’ve had more than enough child and baby momma drama. I’m not going to just take it upon myself to dismiss and go against what his children’s mothers have stated as law. I’m going to bring it to him instead, and let him make decisions and proceed according to what he says, so the mothers can’t blame me.

That is as far as rules strictly pertaining to the children. For issues that concern my household and how I run it, that is different, because I am the one and only Queen of my household.

Have you ever asked why? 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Jul 24, 2022 17:32:46 GMT -5 @athena53 said:

Back from a bike ride. Rain is coming in and the cloud cover made a huge difference. I'd planned on going 10 miles ad did 12 instead and I feel good.

Another thought on DramaQ's mother's doctors: we all want compassion and competence in our doctors. Some just don't have both. When I was in HS I read a memoir by the Mayo brothers and they made the observation the that docs who are so good that other docs go to them but who lack bedside manner are the ones who get sued. The friendly but bumbling doc who delivered everybody in town and played golf with their Dad but missed a diagnosis till it was too late or was unsuccessful with a procedure a more competent doc could have done better doesn't get sued because he's such a nice guy. It sounds like Dr. Doom is extremely competent and Mom needs all the competence she can get in her corner.

And Dr. Doom may have erred on the side of caution and gathered the family just in case it was Mom's last hours because she wanted them to have the opportunity if the worst happened.  

Drama, please keep us posted and take care of yourself while you're trying to keep your family together.

I'm going to disagree I think medical schools can work more on teaching students that they are dealing with humans..

My vet has more compassion and can still very clearly explain to me that Leonard has cancer and is going to die..

If I can be afforded that with a dog who I'm destined to have a short time with regardless of health a fucking people doctor can know don't pop in a room announce statistics then leave..

I don't blame Dr. Doom for her suggestion. I resent how she did it.

Professionals in the psychology field are taught how to compartmentalize, be Professional and still provide a safe supportive environment for patients.

Medical doctors should be able to as well and I'll die on this hill.

I also get it's an issue of now hospitals are corporations with quotas to meet it doesn't leave much room for humanity.

[NastyWoman]

I am doomed! Through the years I have collected a nice set of CDs. My musical taste runs in "seasons" so the collection is quite diverse. Now, because I have decided to move, I need to reduce the number of albums by at least half (~200 albums) but after a coup!e of days organizing I have discarded the grand total of THREE albums! This is not going well at 

[CCL]

Jul 24, 2022 18:31:14 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

I am doomed! Through the years I have collected a nice set of CDs. My musical taste runs in "seasons" so the collection is quite diverse. Now, because I have decided to move, I need to reduce the number of albums by at least half (~200 albums) but after a coup!e of days organizing I have discarded the grand total of THREE albums! This is not going well at 

Why reduce the #? If you still like them, keep them.

[NastyWoman]

Jul 24, 2022 18:33:24 GMT -5 CCL said:

Jul 24, 2022 18:31:14 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

I am doomed! Through the years I have collected a nice set of CDs. My musical taste runs in "seasons" so the collection is quite diverse. Now, because I have decided to move, I need to reduce the number of albums by at least half (~200 albums) but after a coup!e of days organizing I have discarded the grand total of THREE albums! This is not going well at 

Why reduce the #? If you still like them, keep them.

Intercontinental moves are $$$$$. I just HAVE to reduce my stuff.

[giramomma]

Jul 24, 2022 17:16:54 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

Jul 24, 2022 17:11:47 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Whine whine. I'll delete later.

SPOILER: Click to show

I really don't want to call up my mom. But, I should. She's been escalating since the 4th of July.

Will calling her reverse the escalation?  Or help you be in a better place?  Just thoughts and whine on as needed 

It  actually went pretty well.

There was still quite a bit of history re-writing and other assorted comments that can be filed under "things that make me go hmmm."

And, she's forgotten how to take care of herself, which is worrysome. But, I'll cut her some slack on that.

[ners]

Need to get in some steps.  I have been slacking lately.

[minnesotapaintlady]

Jul 24, 2022 18:46:00 GMT -5 ners said:

Need to get in some steps.  I have been slacking lately.

I'm at 41,000 for the weekend.  I'm beat.  Like exhausted. 

[giramomma]

Jul 24, 2022 19:04:12 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Jul 24, 2022 18:46:00 GMT -5 ners said:

Need to get in some steps.  I have been slacking lately.

I'm at 41,000 for the weekend.  I'm beat.  Like exhausted. 

Holy crap!

[empress of self-improvement]

I successfully soaked myself wrinkled. I think I fell asleep a bit there. Oops.

I am so not getting involved with the doctor issue. We know what happened my last go-round in the hospital with DH. I will say, Drama, if you feel you need a safe place to vent and cry, I can PM you my number. Been there, done that, burned the t-shirt.

[ners]

Jul 24, 2022 19:04:12 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Jul 24, 2022 18:46:00 GMT -5 ners said:

Need to get in some steps.  I have been slacking lately.

I'm at 41,000 for the weekend.  I'm beat.  Like exhausted. 

Nice total.  I only have about 35,000 since Monday.  I had 2002 yesterday and so far, 1368 today.  I think it will take a miracle for me to hit my step goal for the month.

Oh well still on pace to hit my yearly goal.  

[minnesotapaintlady]

Jul 24, 2022 19:08:07 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Jul 24, 2022 19:04:12 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I'm at 41,000 for the weekend.  I'm beat.  Like exhausted. 

Holy crap!

Yard work.  I was out there 8 hours today and a good chunk of yesterday.  It looks really good though.  

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Jul 24, 2022 15:33:56 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

I am still not exercising the way I would like to. I’ve started thinking again about joining a local gym that’s not really just a gym. It’s a partnership or something with a charity, and it’s meant to be a sort of community presence I guess, because they also have some religious type things you can attend if you like. Those aren’t required, just offered. They also offer things like yoga classes, which I am also interested in. Overall the atmosphere is that it’s not just a gym. At least not what I imagine gyms to be like.

Several years ago, Mister and I went to take a tour, and I was really impressed by the facility. But it was out of the way to and from work, so I felt like I wouldn’t really use it because of that.

Since we moved though, it IS on the way home from work, but still about 20 minutes from home. 

I’ve been considering joining again lately because I HAVE to do something, and so far I’m not doing too well on my own. This place also has trainers, and I’m at the point now that if someone told me exactly what to do, it would be a big relief over trying to figure it out on my own. Even if I have to pay that “someone”.

There are at least 3 gyms that I can think of immediately, that are much closer to my home. They don’t have the atmosphere that is appealing to me about this place though.

I haven’t said anything to Mister about my renewed interest in this place. If I do decide to join, I’ll tell him then. If he decides to join too, awesome! If not, it will be something that I need to do for ME, regardless of what somebody else does or doesn’t do.

Atmosphere is everything.  So is cost.

I was in the best shape I had ever been in my life when I joined a gym that had an obscenely expensive membership (about 5% of my take home salary).  I also paid each month, in person so my brain would associate that much money with the gym.  In addition, those people were largely professionals, who went to look out and not a pick up joint.  When I walked out, I looked like I had gone through the wringer…..and I had.

[busymom]

I'm going to vent here, if I may.  Turns out my relative has an antibiotic-resistant infection, and NO ONE told me.  Here I've been visiting him, protected with only my 2-layer fabric mask, while the medical team has been coming in & out of his room fully covered.  I thought they were trying to protect him, but they were trying to keep themselves from passing on the infection to others in the hospital.     Obviously, I'm not happy.  I did some reading on this infection, and it can stay on surfaces for hours.  God forbid I bring it home, or pass it on, unknowingly to someone who could be vulnerable.  


The good news is my relative is very slowly recovering.  But he's not completely out of the woods yet.  

[countrygirl2]

It is storming here tonight, extreme storm warnings until midnight. The lights blinked off and on a couple of times, lost internet and TV for awhile. I worked on reconciling DD's accounts. I have only June and July left. I have to look at the credit card for one item and there is no receipt for it. 

Once this is done, then I can start on MIL's. Hopefully each time I finish something now, it will be the last. I hope I can stop the VA deposit for her and it's not like that last time where it took a year and a half. The SS should be stopped now and the deduction for her insurance, so that is 2 biggys. And I don't think there is another payment for the month, I believe we pay a month ahead.  

I will be happy to get out from under all that paperwork. DD's isn't bad, I let it go 5 months and has taken 2 afternoons so far to catch up.  For MIL will have to prepare an update and packet of all the final items. I will get it, just hope it comes together smoothly.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Dad just texted that mom was awake for awhile. She can respond to commands and she reacts to dad's voice.

That is a very good sign I think. Fingers crossed.

[NoNamePerson]

Jul 24, 2022 18:31:14 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

I am doomed! Through the years I have collected a nice set of CDs. My musical taste runs in "seasons" so the collection is quite diverse. Now, because I have decided to move, I need to reduce the number of albums by at least half (~200 albums) but after a coup!e of days organizing I have discarded the grand total of THREE albums! This is not going well at 

You are doing good compared to where I would be in this process. I would throw out furniture before I would turn loose of any of my music collection regardless of the format ie, albums, cd's and yep I still have some 45's - long story!! 

[toomuchreality]

Jul 24, 2022 20:58:45 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Dad just texted that mom was awake for awhile. She can respond to commands and she reacts to dad's voice.

That is a very good sign I think. Fingers crossed.

This seems like great news! Yay!

[NastyWoman]

Jul 24, 2022 21:00:25 GMT -5 NoNamePerson said:

Jul 24, 2022 18:31:14 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

I am doomed! Through the years I have collected a nice set of CDs. My musical taste runs in "seasons" so the collection is quite diverse. Now, because I have decided to move, I need to reduce the number of albums by at least half (~200 albums) but after a coup!e of days organizing I have discarded the grand total of THREE albums! This is not going well at 

You are doing good compared to where I would be in this process. I would throw out furniture before I would turn loose of any of my music collection regardless of the format ie, albums, cd's and yep I still have some 45's - long story!! 

Furniture is in the "this goes with and that stays" phase. This whole move is a long term project (think a couple of years) so the items that will stay in the US can, for the time being, stay right where they are.