TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jul 23, 2024 14:45:50 GMT -5
I am shocked by what I see when I look in the mirror this morning. I will not be leaving the house. I'm so sorry if you're not comfortable with how things look right now. Remember, it'll be at least a couple of weeks before you have an idea of how the "final product" might look. And, at least for me personally, skin on your face takes a LONG time to get back to looking normal after any procedure. So, just avoid the mirror for a bit, rest up, and is there a t.v. series or bunch of movies, or a good book you can distract yourself with? I can't totally avoid it because it needs care things done to it. He told he by Monday when I go back a lot of the swelling will have subsided. It's swollen where my glasses sit, so reading is difficult. He said as this heals, my skin will be red, then pink and gradually return to it's natural color in about a year. Yes, it's slow, but I won't look all swollen and bruised and have sutures that long.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jul 23, 2024 14:48:36 GMT -5
Hugs weltz. Wish I lived closer to take care of sushi This.
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notagain
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Post by notagain on Jul 23, 2024 14:51:00 GMT -5
Healing thoughts for you Theo
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jul 23, 2024 14:52:05 GMT -5
It's been a fairly productive day. We even spent 45 minutes decluttering. I filled a paper grocery sack full of paper to recycle. I'm not done yet. And just might actually not die of embarrassment.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jul 23, 2024 14:52:27 GMT -5
weltz I hope you have a very successful surgery. I am not in a place where I can help out with Sushi at the moment.
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Jul 23, 2024 15:01:07 GMT -5
best wishes for a good outcome. how quickly can you get in for surgery, weltz? I don't know. It depends on what the tests show. However I'm being looked after by the Rapid Investigation Unit, so it probably won't be too long.
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Jul 23, 2024 15:12:09 GMT -5
Well, I definitely have cancer. My options are chemo or cutting it out. I opted for surgery. They said with chemo, it could come back. Why is it that so many of us have have cancer ? Could it be that YMAM is giving us cancer? I'm so sorry. Hope by catching it early your surgery will be a complete success. Can your son help you out while you recover? He won't have a choice, will he? He floated the idea of bringing Sushi to his house, but there's a dog there, and two other cats. Sushi is used to just me and him for the last 13 years. Besides, he and Melody fight a lot, and there going to be a lot of screaming. It's been their "love language" for 17 years.
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Jul 23, 2024 15:17:27 GMT -5
I took the bus home. I was going to sit down when the bus lurched forward, causing me to grab at something in order not to do a faceplant on the dirty bus floor. Unfortunately, it was a guy's shirt, and I tore the pocket right off. I kept apologizing and he kept laughing, telling me not to worry about it. Nice man.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Jul 23, 2024 15:27:28 GMT -5
Well, I definitely have cancer. My options are chemo or cutting it out. I opted for surgery. They said with chemo, it could come back. Why is it that so many of us have have cancer ? Could it be that YMAM is giving us cancer? So sorry to hear this! Sending prayers and healing thoughts.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 23, 2024 15:30:31 GMT -5
but I hope it that it is just swelling/discoloration and that the pain is, and will stay, bearable. There is swelling. It doesn't hurt if I am doing nothing. It hurts to talk because the muscles above my mouth are so swollen. Doctor assured me I will look much better by Monday. He better have been correct. So many sutures. The pictures didnt prepare me for it to be my face. Did you inform doc that you are online with pEEps who know 50 ways to kill and hide the bodies. This board isn’t just fluff stuff.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 23, 2024 15:40:59 GMT -5
Apologies for flooding the general thread with eldercare woes. I will take a break and then resume posting in the designated thread. But the support, and reality checks, have been appreciated. I'm OK with it. I need something to distract myself with. I just planned out my short-term disability outline with my doctor. It is really hurting my mind and finances to think about not being back to FT strength until possibly the end of October. And if it were more of a desk job maybe I could do some work from home, but it is not.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 23, 2024 15:42:29 GMT -5
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jul 23, 2024 16:16:05 GMT -5
Well, I definitely have cancer. My options are chemo or cutting it out. I opted for surgery. They said with chemo, it could come back. Why is it that so many of us have have cancer ? Could it be that YMAM is giving us cancer? oooooohhhh, I'm sorry to hear that
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jul 23, 2024 16:18:04 GMT -5
I have an in person interview for the technical analyst position next Tuesday. Fingers crossed! ETA: And I have a phone screen for the clinical lab technician role. AWESOME!
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 23, 2024 16:21:20 GMT -5
There is swelling. It doesn't hurt if I am doing nothing. It hurts to talk because the muscles above my mouth are so swollen. Doctor assured me I will look much better by Monday. He better have been correct. So many sutures. The pictures didnt prepare me for it to be my face. Did you inform doc that you are online with pEEps who know 50 ways to kill and hide the bodies. This board isn’t just fluff stuff. Hey we are going to trust she got a good doctor. No need to go there ... at least yet.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jul 23, 2024 16:22:12 GMT -5
I'm a little less anxious about DS at camp today. I looked at the Google photos of the camp and I know he's having a great time. He'll probably get bitten completely up by mosquitos, but I'm sure he's fine other than that, LOL. As long as they check thoroughly for ticks, I'll be good. Just finished dealing w/ Lymes disease and I don't want to do it again.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Jul 23, 2024 16:29:14 GMT -5
So sorry about the news, weltz.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jul 23, 2024 16:45:45 GMT -5
But she's not trying to be unobtrusive, she's making it all about her. She literally got up and walked out of the funeral service for their grandmother while their cousin sang the Ave Maria. The cousin is a teacher now but she got a full ride through the university on a vocal scholarship, and the song was very beautiful and touching. I haven’t read every single post lately, but what exactly is her issue? Is it with the Catholic faith, or what? Not that it really matters, since she’s being such a PITA. Mister’s friend that I refer to as his “mentor” here, is a Muslim. They are not supposed to go inside churches, and he is very serious about being a Muslim, and active in with it, to the point that he often travels to be of service for certain things. But when Mister’s Dad died, he cared enough about Mister to come to the funeral, in a church. He didn’t make a fuss about it, or even tell Mister he was coming. He just showed up. I didn’t even see him, but as he was leaving as soon as the service was over and everybody came outside after the family,, he went to Mister and hugged him. He was the one that him and his wife kept bringing food and calling me to check on Mister. They didn’t ask if we needed something to eat, they just called me and told me that either something was being delivered or they were on their way with some food. He called me the day after the funeral and said they didn’t bring anything the day of the funeral because they figured family had tended to Mister, and he was appalled when I told him no, nobody had done anything and I’d ordered something to be delivered. I said it in a matter of fact way, not trying to down Mister’s family, but he was still shocked and appalled. So he and his wife showed up again that afternoon to drop off dinner, a bottle of his wife’s favorite wine, and some other treats for Mister. Anyway, aside from him showing Mister love by dropping off food and stuff, and constantly checking on him, Mister and I both understood what it meant that he came to the funeral. That was probably an even bigger deal for him to make that decision, than all the other things he and his wife had been doing and did. I was thinking your SIL was being weird about the upcoming celebration, but if she walked out of a funeral, which I am sure didn’t go unnoticed, because of whatever her hangup is, that is beyond weird to me.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 23, 2024 17:02:37 GMT -5
I took the bus home. I was going to sit down when the bus lurched forward, causing me to grab at something in order not to do a faceplant on the dirty bus floor. Unfortunately, it was a guy's shirt, and I tore the pocket right off. I kept apologizing and he kept laughing, telling me not to worry about it. Nice man. Oh no. I'm glad he was kind to you and did not give you grief.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 23, 2024 17:26:51 GMT -5
Well, I definitely have cancer. My options are chemo or cutting it out. I opted for surgery. They said with chemo, it could come back. Why is it that so many of us have have cancer ? Could it be that YMAM is giving us cancer? I'm so sorry. Hope by catching it early your surgery will be a complete success. Can your son help you out while you recover? I think surgery is a good idea Weltz. YMAM might give us cancer, but I'm going to say not it. I have enough medical issues at the moment TY. Good luck though. Cancer seems to be having a resurgence and yet more Listeria deaths in the US.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jul 23, 2024 18:07:52 GMT -5
My counseling session today was very helpful, and reminded me of why I thought she was a good fit for me at the beginning, even though we have had a few bumps along the way.
I had tears rolling down my face more often than not during the session, starting from the very beginning. But it was not a “woe is me” kind of session. Even though I was feeling pitiful, I wanted her to help me try to get out of it, and she rose to the occasion. She was empathetic and compassionate about me being so visibly upset, but she still did her job instead of just “patting me on my head” and telling me everything will be okay and not coaching me in ways that I could understand, on how to work on being okay.
At one point, I told her that my brain understands everything she was saying to me, I already knew and understood it on an intellectual level, but there is still some sort of disconnect for me, because I struggle so much with applying what I know to be true, in my real life. So she told me specific things to do, to start working on it, and it wasn’t some cumbersome stuff that seemed like mountains for me to climb, it was things that I thought “okay, I can do that”.
I’ve known all along what triggered me and led me to this crazy place I’ve been in for a few weeks now, mentally and physically. But during our talking today, I had an AHA moment about the trigger being even deeper than what I was aware of. That was at the end, after we’d already gone past my allotted time, so I told her I wanted to just quickly share what it was because I felt like it was important, and we could go further into it at my next session. She still spent a few more minutes on that.
I ended up assuring her that I was okay and felt much better than I did when we started the session. I told her that she had been very helpful today, and even though I know it’s “just” her job, I sincerely appreciated the work she did with me today, and how she handled me with so much compassion and grace, while still doing her job. She said that she was glad that things happened with her schedule that she was able to spend some extra time with me today.
I’ve said before that I liked her from the beginning because even though she’s doing her job, my sessions are often like me talking to a friend that has the knowledge and skills to guide me and and help me figure things out, even if that sometimes means gently calling me out on some some of my bs. Today, I laughed several times through my tears, not because she was cracking jokes, but because sometimes she says and does things that are genuinely funny to me, We have a lot in common, so she also “gets me”, and sometimes I say things that make her laugh too. Sometimes it’s because I repeat back what she’s said to me, in my own words and in a way that she can’t say as a professional, and she laughs and says YES!
Anyway, I am very glad that I already had the appointment scheduled today, and that I didn’t reschedule it for another day, like I thought about doing yesterday.
When I was done, P was dealing with stuff and I haven’t heard back from her yet, so at this point it looks like I will probably just have to go see her tomorrow.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Jul 23, 2024 18:09:05 GMT -5
Today was a bit rough because of side effects from the statin I took last night but I managed to be fairly productive. I scrubbed down the kitchen with Lysol, bleached the countertops with Clorox, and mopped the floors. I got most of the brokerage statements reconciled and will tackle the last one (DH's IRA with a lot of positions) tomorrow. I'm also in the mood for a major pantry reorganization. And dinner tomorrow will be Instant Pot goat curry with rice and naan.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Jul 23, 2024 18:11:05 GMT -5
Well, I definitely have cancer. My options are chemo or cutting it out. I opted for surgery. They said with chemo, it could come back. Why is it that so many of us have have cancer ? Could it be that YMAM is giving us cancer?
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ners
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Post by ners on Jul 23, 2024 18:27:42 GMT -5
Well, I definitely have cancer. My options are chemo or cutting it out. I opted for surgery. They said with chemo, it could come back. Why is it that so many of us have have cancer ? Could it be that YMAM is giving us cancer? I am sorry weltz.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jul 23, 2024 19:01:19 GMT -5
I have not cooked in months. When I was off work with my foot earlier this year, I cooked dinner almost every day. By the time I went back to work, Mister and I both were sick and tired of all the meals he and I knew how to cook. Because during that time, I did try new things, but I mostly relied on food that we were familiar with, even if I asked for his help with telling me how to season/cook something that he was better at than I was.
Neither of us wanted to see another chicken wing, chicken breast, or piece of salmon, beef or pork, because I’d run through every way I knew how to cook all of it.
So we started ordering food from restaurants.
Fast forward to today, we have both occasionally bought groceries since then, but today I can’t remember the last time either of us bought groceries. We have meat and frozen vegetables in the freezer in the house and in the deep freezer in the storage room, but neither one of us wants to cook, because we are both still over everything we use to cook.
I feel like an asshole for even complaining, because we do have food in our freezers that we can cook and eat, even if it’s not what we want, and a lot of people don’t even have that when they are trying to figure out what they and their family will eat for dinner.
So now, idek what point I was even trying to make with this post, and I feel like I should probably just erase it and not post it.
But the devil on my shoulder says don’t erase it, because maybe I’m not the only person that needs a reminder that even with all of our very real problems and issues, most of us here are still very fortunate in many ways, compared to people that are struggling with just the basic necessities of life, like having shelter and food to eat. And access to appropriate medical care so they can even try to just keep trying.
I will hush now. I hope that all of my friends here find a path to deal with whatever is troubling them, and get to a healthy place on the other side, whether it is a first world problem or not, and wherever the troubles land on the scale of what other people might consider a small thing or a big thing.
I love (most of) y’all, and goodnight.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jul 23, 2024 19:18:35 GMT -5
Pink, with my DH's food allergies/issues I 1000% feel you on being sick of the food we have. But also we can't go out many places because of said allergies! I just try to find new ways to cook the same old same old. I made a lemon peel pesto sauce Sunday that was wonderful! But I'm also glad that DH loves to cook.
Either way, yes - we have it better than many people. But that doesn't mean things don't suck in our lives from time to time. And it's okay to feel the suck and talk about it.
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cooper88
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Post by cooper88 on Jul 23, 2024 19:22:47 GMT -5
Big virtual hugs and thoughts of healing to all here who need them. I know right now there are many.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jul 23, 2024 19:50:03 GMT -5
The food rut is real!
When that happens to us, I just accept that it's a rut, that I just need something in my belly, and then go off and make me some oatmeal for dinner. Because cheap.
I dunno. I think it's OK if food is looked at as utilitarian, rather than something that gives us pleasure. Just like, sometimes, a car is a way to go from point A to point B.
The other thing, is is eating out more expensive than cooking at home? If you all are eating out equivalent of what you'd spend in groceries a week, then i guess I wouldn't see the issue.
(In our case, what we get in weekly groceries would be like four dinners for our family. No breakfasts or lunches. So, not really cost effective).
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jul 23, 2024 20:01:40 GMT -5
I haven’t read every single post lately, but what exactly is her issue? Is it with the Catholic faith, or what? Not that it really matters, since she’s being such a PITA. Mister’s friend that I refer to as his “mentor” here, is a Muslim. They are not supposed to go inside churches, and he is very serious about being a Muslim, and active in with it, to the point that he often travels to be of service for certain things. But when Mister’s Dad died, he cared enough about Mister to come to the funeral, in a church. He didn’t make a fuss about it, or even tell Mister he was coming. He just showed up. I didn’t even see him, but as he was leaving as soon as the service was over and everybody came outside after the family,, he went to Mister and hugged him. He was the one that him and his wife kept bringing food and calling me to check on Mister. They didn’t ask if we needed something to eat, they just called me and told me that either something was being delivered or they were on their way with some food. He called me the day after the funeral and said they didn’t bring anything the day of the funeral because they figured family had tended to Mister, and he was appalled when I told him no, nobody had done anything and I’d ordered something to be delivered. I said it in a matter of fact way, not trying to down Mister’s family, but he was still shocked and appalled. So he and his wife showed up again that afternoon to drop off dinner, a bottle of his wife’s favorite wine, and some other treats for Mister. Anyway, aside from him showing Mister love by dropping off food and stuff, and constantly checking on him, Mister and I both understood what it meant that he came to the funeral. That was probably an even bigger deal for him to make that decision, than all the other things he and his wife had been doing and did. I was thinking your SIL was being weird about the upcoming celebration, but if she walked out of a funeral, which I am sure didn’t go unnoticed, because of whatever her hangup is, that is beyond weird to me. Your friend sounds like a real blessing for Mister. It is a shame that his family didn't do anything for him after the funeral, but great that he has such a good friend. My SIL believes that Catholics are going to hell for worshiping Mary instead of Jesus. I explained to her that we just ask Mary to pray for us, just like SIL asks other Christians to pray for her, but she told me I was wrong. My husband has a hard time accepting her judgement of us because she jumps from church to church on a regular basis, with occasional drama filled posts on social media about being betrayed by people that she trusted. She is on the autism spectrum, and her family reacted to that by making her the center of attention and giving her everything she wanted while she was growing up. So she has a hard time if everyone doesn't cater to her. Her mom is a real piece of work. For example she showed up at our house to pick up her kids, and her mom unexpectedly came with and asked for a tour. So we showed her mom through our house and every room she would comment that my SIL should have my house instead. And my SIL would do this in this room, and my niece should have this room, and this would be the play room for my nephew, etc. So I can see how she came out a bit messed up if her mom wants to award her with my house. I didn’t see this post before I said goodnight, but I feel like I need to respond since you took the time to answer my questions. As far as religion goes, I feel like many of us that even believe in God and Jesus, get caught up in things that “man” decided, things that are nowhere to be found in the Bible. I’m not trying to start a debate about religion, I’m just acknowledging that a lot of the division among Christians, and the thoughts that Catholics, Methodists, Baptists, Protestants, and whatever other denominations on the list that I don’t feel like exhausting, are so special and the only “true” way, are due to rules that “man” made and have little or nothing to do with things that were actually written in the Bible. And I risk my Grandmother who died over 10 years ago, coming and smacking the shit out of me for saying that I have questions about the Bible too, since the Bible as we know it, was written by men. But that’s a whole ‘nother subject. Anyway, it sounds like your SIL has some learned behavior from her Mom, in addition to whatever her nature is. That’s sad, and I would be looking at her Mom sideways because of what you described, but the bottom line is that none of it is really your problem. I understand trying to accommodate and be gracious, but being gracious goes both ways.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Jul 23, 2024 20:04:53 GMT -5
It is cooling down here. Lower 90s but they did lie (again)and we reached 99° - two degrees higher than last night's forecast. R and I hung out in the pool for 2.5 hours. Well covered up against the sun (hat, sunglasses, swim tees) it was just perfect! I had prepared a cantaloupe chicken salad for lunch and we just spend time afterwards catching up. It is good to be retired
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