daisylu
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Post by daisylu on May 3, 2024 7:58:49 GMT -5
Working on slides for corporate presentations. There are 3 that need to get completed today and all three have different requirements need to look and be spun differently.
I encouraged a coworker to apply for an open position that was likely created for me, but I am not sure that I want to transition quite yet - plus I know that there will other opportunities for me in the future and she is miserable in her current position. I notified the manager that I encouraged her to apply and think that she would be a good fit, so I am expecting a not so happy call from him today. I am also now teetering on if should I apply.
I know that I am fortunate and that this is a good problem to have.
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jerseygirl
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Post by jerseygirl on May 3, 2024 8:02:53 GMT -5
We got good news yesterday from Jerseyguy’s oncologist. Last year his bone marrow was 80% lymphoma cells. Last week less than 5% We’re so happy and emotional that almost exactly a year from when we learned both of us had cancer, we’re ok. Me with none detected and him so very much improved. He’ll take the immunotherapy med for at least snother year. But he’s having no problems with it
Laundry - I was a SAHM with a baby and toddler when Jerseyguy complained about his laundry. Well, you know how you like it then better do it yourself. So I stopped Partnership - I like washing dishes but will leave them on counter to dry. Which Jerseyguy complained about. Dislike unloading dishwater so would rather wash dishes myself. So now we put dirty dishes in dishwasher and he unloads and puts away.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on May 3, 2024 8:04:42 GMT -5
Gira - your analysis was helpful. I actually bought those www.fairplaylife.com/the-cards but haven't been able to get traction with DH to work through them. I need to find a time when we're alone and peaceful but then I end up not wanting to disrupt that time with a possible fight/rehash of unevenness by trying the cards. I just blocked an hour on our calendars for next Sat with those cards as the topic. Fingers crossed.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on May 3, 2024 8:18:15 GMT -5
I'm already annoyed and it's only 8 am.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on May 3, 2024 8:21:55 GMT -5
My dad's family required all the kids to do all the chores. So boys did dishes and girls milked the cow. He and his sisters traded in high-school because he preferred milking the cow and they preferred doing dishes but that was a conversation. My dad cooked and cleaned and my mom worked on rentals and whatever "men's work" is. Dad lived on his own for more than a decade, and my mom had lost a husband and lived on her own raising a child. They just did what needed to get done and they were both hard workers picking up slack if needed. I didn't realize not everyone was like that which in hindsight is ripe for being taken advantage of. Especially when one runs off with their hs sweetheart, never lives alone, etc.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on May 3, 2024 8:22:16 GMT -5
I do the laundry usually. DH will do his. He tends to wait until everything is dirty and then it takes all day. And this was messing up my laundry before vacation.
He does dishes and scrubs bathrooms. In the past he hasn't been so good on the dishes. I'm working on training myself to leave them.
I would do the dishes in the past so I wasn't looking at them the next day or needing to do dishes before I could cook the next night's dinner. And that just makes me angry when I have to clean the kitchen first. Especially since he is now in the office 3 days a week so doing them the next day is not an option most days. I often begin cooking before he gets home, especially if he stops on the way to visit his parents.
Definitely a work in progress. I saw someone recommend the cards and a book. Doing more this year was one of his goals.
In regards to raising, DH was the baby. He did do his own laundry from when he was in high school onward. He knows how to clean but his timetable is sometimes later than mine. His mom was a SAHM and then worked only part time when he got older. From 8 to 20, I was one of three. We all did chores and it was drilled into us to pitch in. If you walk by a full trash can, empty it. If the dryer buzzes, switch the laundry, etc. It's very true though if the other person isn't like that, one person will end up with most of the work.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on May 3, 2024 8:26:10 GMT -5
Ohhh.. Now I want to change my screen name to gatormomma. lol. Is it weird I was reading it as cat and not gator?
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 3, 2024 8:28:43 GMT -5
DH does laundry for the most part. He isn't good at separating and used to use WAY too much detergent till we switched to pods.
He takes them out of the dryer right away and folds.
I'm good at the washing part but I tend to use the dryer as a hamper because I hate folding clothes.
We drive each other insane. So he does most of the day to day. I handle anything that needs specific care instructions and tackle stain removal.
I'm horrible at most cleaning. It's my ADHD. I'm that person who starts cleaning then finds a shiny and promptly forgets what I was doing.
I could probably do more. I used to do the lion's share till COVID and we flipped. I'll admit I took advantage because it was a nice change.
I do chores but I tend towards the one offs or bigger projects things that let me hyper focus and I'm not blind too.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 3, 2024 8:37:22 GMT -5
I think it's really important to live on your own before marriage personally. At least for a little while.
I had a two year engagement with DH because I was fresh out of college. It was important for me not to go from my parents, a dorm and then straight into marriage.
I wanted to know who I was "single" and that I could handle all aspects of running a house.
I know DH can he lived alone plenty before we met. BUT he got in a bad habit of letting his mom do a lot when he moved back into Manawa.
That was a bitch of a habit to break. It's part of why I insisted on moving into my house. She'd have to drive and she couldn't do porch stairs very well.
Not so easy to walk in at 5am to clean.
I told DH once they are lucky I'm not one of those people who shoot first. She scared the crap out of me the first time it happened.
Loved her very much but damn she had no concept of boundaries.
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lurkyloo
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“Time means nothing now,” said Toad. “It is just the thing that happens between snacks.”
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Post by lurkyloo on May 3, 2024 8:48:51 GMT -5
On a positive note about mental loads...we are 5 weeks into home chef meal prep deliveries. Only one recipe has been so-so. The rest have been great. 4 servings usually stretches to 5 or 6. Ordering 3-4 per week and supplementing the rest of our meals from freezer, salad, pizza, etc. Intro deal was well priced, ongoing is a bit spendy but man is helping me. I do can shop less, waste less, eat better and dd11 has taken to cooking a couple nights a week without being asked or even asking many questions. Tonight she and I were at hair appt where she got blonde ombre put in as a big middle finger to leaving private school dress code in our dust. Came home at 530 and DH had cooked a meal from it without prompting. They are also weighing in on future orders so that's becoming not my problem too. When I cook them, it's so easy bc literally everything except salt, pepper and oil is included. Most are 20 min prep. Def a privileged option but so, so helpful for me. We’re on week 2 of dinnerly after a few months of blue apron. Generally dinnerly has been less expensive esp after initial BA deal expired, but less complete (still have five small garlic cloves and a bunch of spices from BA on the counter) which I think is a fair tradeoff. The protein portions are smaller though and the steaks last week weren’t great quality. But, the range of recipes offered is much better and I like the increased flexibility-BA really wanted us to do 3 recipes a week, no more no less without formally changing the plan, which was annoying sometimes. Dinnerly lets us add and subtract at will. The baked feta pasta wasn’t great (tbf I added way too much seasoning) but the pan fried gnocchi yesterday was delicious. Occasionally we are successful in getting DS to eat a vegetable. I will put home chef on the list for after we‘re bored with dinnerly
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lurkyloo
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“Time means nothing now,” said Toad. “It is just the thing that happens between snacks.”
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Post by lurkyloo on May 3, 2024 8:54:56 GMT -5
I have always done the laundry, because I don’t mind it, and because dishes are about 85% DH‘s job. I hate dishes. azucena We had an inflatable 6 person hot tub from intex. Not sure if that’s the way you‘d want to go, but it was only about $600 in 2019 and it worked really well for a few years. Biggest annoyance was that there isn’t seating inside. And you’re still on the hook for electricity to heat, chemicals, etc.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 3, 2024 8:57:31 GMT -5
I tried baked feta pasta. It turns out at least for me there is such a thing as too much feta. 🤢
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on May 3, 2024 9:03:45 GMT -5
andi9899 Pink was going to Philly for a few days on a work-related thing Actually, she said she was going to Pittsburgh. Yeah, if she came to Philly I would have demanded a meeting whether she liked it or not!
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on May 3, 2024 9:15:30 GMT -5
This is what gets to me. DH didn't see or hear things that need to be done and when I lose my sh*t over it I'm a crazy b*tch. (My words, not his.)
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on May 3, 2024 9:23:08 GMT -5
Actually, she said she was going to Pittsburgh. Yeah, if she came to Philly I would have demanded a meeting whether she liked it or not! DD is in Philly this weekend. If I end up having to rescue her from my toxic family, I'll let you know.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on May 3, 2024 9:23:39 GMT -5
Hubs picks up his dirty clothes and puts them in the hamper. Since we both have colored clothes and whites, I do 2 loads most days. I will strip the beds and wash the linens, he will make up the beds.
He takes out the trash daily. And if I ask he will clean the litter boxes. When I'm gone, he takes good care of the cats. I asked today if he wanted me to wash the sheets on our beds, he said he will do it. I told him DD's needs it too and her blankets. He is going to change the furnace filter and add water softener salts.
He gets up earlier than me so feeds the kitties and DD. She takes her bath and puts her dirty clothes in the laundry room. I do wash her hair and brush her teeth. Hubs will likely vac and mop before we get home.
He cleans his truck but doesn't do as good a job inside so I will do it once in awhile.
He takes care of all the equipment, repairs, and lawn now except my landscaping across the front. I take care of most of the paperwork, but I am encouraging him to get more involved so he knows, what and where things are, he has.
So we each do a lot but he will even iron his clothes if need be. He will help with things like sitting the table if I ask and if I feel bad will fix meals for he and DD.
He said when he first retired and I was complaining. You go ahead and do all this stuff if you just ask I will help. I was used to doing it, but didn't take long for me to ask.
I do most of the cooking but again if I don't he will find something to eat. So I really can't complain too much.
Ok, need to fix my hair and DD's finish packing and get ready. We are going to eat something on the way to the airport. I am fixing DD and I a ham sandwich each, some little tomatoes, a cuke, and some apple slices to eat on the plane. That food you buy just isn't good, wish it were.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on May 3, 2024 9:33:45 GMT -5
One of the parents of a kid in the missy's 3K program committed suicide. We weren't close to the deceased, but we did know the parents of the deceased.
The deceased wasn't all that much older than DS.
And how is it fair that I was somehow granted the gift of watching the missy grow up...and yet my neighbor and now this parent were not given that gift.
My life is not inherently better. I'm not more worthy.
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lurkyloo
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“Time means nothing now,” said Toad. “It is just the thing that happens between snacks.”
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Post by lurkyloo on May 3, 2024 9:34:28 GMT -5
My mother wouldn’t let us do laundry when we were growing up. It wasn’t that hard to figure out at the dorms, although there was a moment maybe 6 weeks in that I realized it hadn’t occurred to me to wash my sheets yet My mother was a SAHM who did basically everything and was bitter about it, but I don’t recall really being encouraged to do chores beyond cleaning my room, clearing my plate and not leaving a huge mess in the common areas (and it also never occurred to me tbh I suppose I cooked dinner or baked sometimes, but I sucked at cleaning up after myself afterwards. At 10 DS has a few chores including folding his laundry, but he’s a hot mess on the organization front so it’s slow going.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 3, 2024 9:54:54 GMT -5
Fuck Abby has lice again. The fourth time this month!
But now we know the source. It's one of her friends. She stayed over last week. The math lines up.
She's a super sweet kid but we agreed she can't sleep over anymore and Abbby can't go to her house.
Abby is picking up full size adults which the lice lady said means there is a really bad infestation in that house.
DH said he'd be willing to pay for her friend to get treated but we are not sure how to address that.
And she has brothers. I wouldn't be surprised if the whole house has them. Treating her and not everyone else solves nothing.
She's still welcome to come over to play here. Abby isn't getting them just by hanging out here.
We can't keep doing this. I'm not going to shave Abby when simply banning sleepovers will solve it but I feel like I'm picking on her friend.
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on May 3, 2024 9:55:57 GMT -5
Apparently everything I say is "snippy" lately (personal, not professional life). So Ima just be quiet and let things play out.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on May 3, 2024 9:58:59 GMT -5
Yeah, if she came to Philly I would have demanded a meeting whether she liked it or not! DD is in Philly this weekend. If I end up having to rescue her from my toxic family, I'll let you know. I hope she can enjoy herself. Sunday is Broad Street Run day, so of course it's going to rain. Boo.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on May 3, 2024 10:03:21 GMT -5
On a positive note about mental loads...we are 5 weeks into home chef meal prep deliveries. Only one recipe has been so-so. The rest have been great. 4 servings usually stretches to 5 or 6. Ordering 3-4 per week and supplementing the rest of our meals from freezer, salad, pizza, etc. Intro deal was well priced, ongoing is a bit spendy but man is helping me. I do can shop less, waste less, eat better and dd11 has taken to cooking a couple nights a week without being asked or even asking many questions. Tonight she and I were at hair appt where she got blonde ombre put in as a big middle finger to leaving private school dress code in our dust. Came home at 530 and DH had cooked a meal from it without prompting. They are also weighing in on future orders so that's becoming not my problem too. When I cook them, it's so easy bc literally everything except salt, pepper and oil is included. Most are 20 min prep. Def a privileged option but so, so helpful for me. We’re on week 2 of dinnerly after a few months of blue apron. Generally dinnerly has been less expensive esp after initial BA deal expired, but less complete (still have five small garlic cloves and a bunch of spices from BA on the counter) which I think is a fair tradeoff. The protein portions are smaller though and the steaks last week weren’t great quality. But, the range of recipes offered is much better and I like the increased flexibility-BA really wanted us to do 3 recipes a week, no more no less without formally changing the plan, which was annoying sometimes. Dinnerly lets us add and subtract at will. The baked feta pasta wasn’t great (tbf I added way too much seasoning) but the pan fried gnocchi yesterday was delicious. Occasionally we are successful in getting DS to eat a vegetable. I will put home chef on the list for after we‘re bored with dinnerly Ping me for referral deal when you're ready. I'm currently willing to pay more to have everything included. Proteins have been great quality and normal portion. Range of recipes seems to fit our needs but we're not super adventurous. Gyros and stroganoff were hits this week and not things we'd make. Home chef pricing decreases a bit at 4 meals, but meal count is totally flexible.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on May 3, 2024 10:05:44 GMT -5
This is what gets to me. DH didn't see or hear things that need to be done and when I lose my sh*t over it I'm a crazy b*tch. (My words, not his.) DH is in charge of trash cans and litter boxes and he stays pretty well up on both. But for the love of all things holy, taking out the trash includes putting in the new trash bag! I washed nasty ass trash cans in Nov and made him help me. I said that's the last time I've ever doing that, period, point blank, peace out. Next time they stink bc you're lazy, guess who's spend their Sat washing them?!
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on May 3, 2024 10:21:46 GMT -5
On a positive note about mental loads...we are 5 weeks into home chef meal prep deliveries. Only one recipe has been so-so. The rest have been great. 4 servings usually stretches to 5 or 6. Ordering 3-4 per week and supplementing the rest of our meals from freezer, salad, pizza, etc. Intro deal was well priced, ongoing is a bit spendy but man is helping me. I do can shop less, waste less, eat better and dd11 has taken to cooking a couple nights a week without being asked or even asking many questions. Tonight she and I were at hair appt where she got blonde ombre put in as a big middle finger to leaving private school dress code in our dust. Came home at 530 and DH had cooked a meal from it without prompting. They are also weighing in on future orders so that's becoming not my problem too. When I cook them, it's so easy bc literally everything except salt, pepper and oil is included. Most are 20 min prep. Def a privileged option but so, so helpful for me. We’re on week 2 of dinnerly after a few months of blue apron. Generally dinnerly has been less expensive esp after initial BA deal expired, but less complete (still have five small garlic cloves and a bunch of spices from BA on the counter) which I think is a fair tradeoff. The protein portions are smaller though and the steaks last week weren’t great quality. But, the range of recipes offered is much better and I like the increased flexibility-BA really wanted us to do 3 recipes a week, no more no less without formally changing the plan, which was annoying sometimes. Dinnerly lets us add and subtract at will. The baked feta pasta wasn’t great (tbf I added way too much seasoning) but the pan fried gnocchi yesterday was delicious. Occasionally we are successful in getting DS to eat a vegetable. I will put home chef on the list for after we‘re bored with dinnerly remind me when you're ready to switch. I regularly get coupon codes for home chef in my online orders elsewhere. I'll try to remember not to recycle them, and can share.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on May 3, 2024 10:22:51 GMT -5
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on May 3, 2024 10:23:46 GMT -5
On a positive note about mental loads...we are 5 weeks into home chef meal prep deliveries. Only one recipe has been so-so. The rest have been great. 4 servings usually stretches to 5 or 6. Ordering 3-4 per week and supplementing the rest of our meals from freezer, salad, pizza, etc. Intro deal was well priced, ongoing is a bit spendy but man is helping me. I do can shop less, waste less, eat better and dd11 has taken to cooking a couple nights a week without being asked or even asking many questions. Tonight she and I were at hair appt where she got blonde ombre put in as a big middle finger to leaving private school dress code in our dust. Came home at 530 and DH had cooked a meal from it without prompting. They are also weighing in on future orders so that's becoming not my problem too. When I cook them, it's so easy bc literally everything except salt, pepper and oil is included. Most are 20 min prep. Def a privileged option but so, so helpful for me. Do you mind sharing which service you are using and the cost? Not the intro cost but the regular monthly cost. Thanks.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on May 3, 2024 10:27:03 GMT -5
Gira - your analysis was helpful.
I actually bought those www.fairplaylife.com/the-cards but haven't been able to get traction with DH to work through them. I need to find a time when we're alone and peaceful but then I end up not wanting to disrupt that time with a possible fight/rehash of unevenness by trying the cards. I just blocked an hour on our calendars for next Sat with those cards as the topic. Fingers crossed. Well, I appreciate that. I hope that the cards help you!
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lurkyloo
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“Time means nothing now,” said Toad. “It is just the thing that happens between snacks.”
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Post by lurkyloo on May 3, 2024 10:57:04 GMT -5
We’re on week 2 of dinnerly after a few months of blue apron. Generally dinnerly has been less expensive esp after initial BA deal expired, but less complete (still have five small garlic cloves and a bunch of spices from BA on the counter) which I think is a fair tradeoff. The protein portions are smaller though and the steaks last week weren’t great quality. But, the range of recipes offered is much better and I like the increased flexibility-BA really wanted us to do 3 recipes a week, no more no less without formally changing the plan, which was annoying sometimes. Dinnerly lets us add and subtract at will. The baked feta pasta wasn’t great (tbf I added way too much seasoning) but the pan fried gnocchi yesterday was delicious. Occasionally we are successful in getting DS to eat a vegetable. I will put home chef on the list for after we‘re bored with dinnerly Ping me for referral deal when you're ready. I'm currently willing to pay more to have everything included. Proteins have been great quality and normal portion. Range of recipes seems to fit our needs but we're not super adventurous. Gyros and stroganoff were hits this week and not things we'd make. Home chef pricing decreases a bit at 4 meals, but meal count is totally flexible. BA standard size is 5 oz steak per person, dinnerly is 4 oz and thus far oddly shaped/hard to cook evenly. Both default to top sirloin which is perfect but DH noted a few were a little tough or gristly (he has the same experience occasionally with grocery store steaks even when I buy the expensive stuff). The salmon doesn’t actually have weights listed. Really I think the problem is DS can cheerfully eat 10 oz of steak or pork in one sitting and ask for more Puberty is expensive!
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 3, 2024 11:10:51 GMT -5
Whose bright idea was it to make Robitussin raspberry flavor?!
It's so gross.
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Cheesy FL-Vol
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Post by Cheesy FL-Vol on May 3, 2024 11:13:28 GMT -5
Ping me for referral deal when you're ready. I'm currently willing to pay more to have everything included. Proteins have been great quality and normal portion. Range of recipes seems to fit our needs but we're not super adventurous. Gyros and stroganoff were hits this week and not things we'd make. Home chef pricing decreases a bit at 4 meals, but meal count is totally flexible. BA standard size is 5 oz steak per person, dinnerly is 4 oz and thus far oddly shaped/hard to cook evenly. Both default to top sirloin which is perfect but DH noted a few were a little tough or gristly (he has the same experience occasionally with grocery store steaks even when I buy the expensive stuff). The salmon doesn’t actually have weights listed. Really I think the problem is DS can cheerfully eat 10 oz of steak or pork in one sitting and ask for more Puberty is expensive! It isn’t just boys. I routinely out-ate my dad and brothers and couldn’t crack 100#. Now I can’t seem to lose it.
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