what are you doing right now?

[triciacus]

Pink, So sorry for your and Mister's loss, may he RIP 🙏, you both will be in my thoughts and prayers 🙏

[notagain]

Pink and mister. Hugs and prayers

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 2, 2023 14:57:56 GMT -5 debthaven said:

OMG Pink Cashmere . I am so so sorry for all your losses. 

Unfortunately, there probably WILL be a mess with the brother. 

I honestly can't believe it happened so quickly. If it's not prying, what did he actually die of? Because I just can't believe it happened so soon.

DH and I lost our four parents within less than two years, many years ago. It was extremely hard, and it was the fastest we'd ever heard of at that point. Mister has us beat. 

My heart goes out to both of you. 

PS I know Mr Messy often (understandably!) irritated the heck out of you. But please remember, you welcomed him into your home every other weekend, in spite of his antics and the stress it caused you.

His last memories of you will be you stroking his head and playing the music he loved.

You can be SO hard on yourself, Pink. PLEASE go easy on yourself, for once. 

Your edit made me cry.

I am glad that I did those things I did to try to comfort him the last time I saw him. 

I’ll be kind to myself, I promise. Thank you.

[Opti]

Pink, sorry for your loss. I wish Mister well; this seems pretty fast for his dad and it's a lot to process. 

[flamingo]

Pink Cashmere, I’m so sorry for yours and Mister’s loss   You’ll be in my thoughts as you navigate this. Wishing you peace. 

[Pink Cashmere]

Y’ALL!

I don’t know what it is with these hummingbirds showing up when they do. I am sitting in the shade in the garage with the door up, because I’m over the deck after that worm fell out the tree on me.

A hummingbird just flew a few inches inside the entrance of the garage and as usual, I thought it was a huge bug at first lol. It paused, and flew back out and off to the side of the garage door.

This is the first summer since we moved here, that I don’t have a lot of flowers on my deck. And before the last few weeks, or whenever I started talking about them, I’d only ever seen 1 for sure, maybe 2, period. And now, in the garage?!

[raeoflyte]

Pink I'm so sorry.  I'll be thinking of you and Mister.  

[Pink Cashmere]

Thank you everyone. I love y’all!

[anciana]

Pink, my deepest condolences to you, Mister and the family 🥀

[giramomma]

I am so sorry Pink.

[seriousthistime]

Sept 2, 2023 14:57:56 GMT -5 debthaven said:

  

please remember, you welcomed him into your home every other weekend, in spite of his antics and the stress it caused you.

His last memories of you will be you stroking his head and playing the music he loved.

You can be SO hard on yourself, Pink. PLEASE go easy on yourself, for once. 

I am so very sorry, Pink Cashmere.  

I echo what debthaven said.  Hold onto the goodness of the recent past, including when Mister was shaving his father's beard.  It's those poignant thoughts you should focus on, when you have a moment to think.  

I wish you and Mister peace and love during this trying time. 

[debthaven]

Pink I know NOTHING about hummingbirds ... I don't think I've ever even seen one. I grew up in NY, went to school in Boston and Chicago, then moved to a suburb of Paris. All definitely north of where you are. 

But I'm guessing it's a sign from the people that love you?!

Many hugs to you and Mister. 

I know you'll be there for each other, and that's what matters. 

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

Sept 2, 2023 14:27:47 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Mr. Messy died this morning.

I was at work and on the phone with Mister, he was getting dressed to go see his Dad. As soon as we hung up, Aunt D called me to tell me that the hospital had just called her to tell her he’d passed. I work too far away to have made it home before Mister left to go to the hospital, so I had to call him and tell him.

I came home and went with him to the hospital, because he wanted to go.

Both of his parents gone in less than 7 months.

This is horrible. 

WHAT!!! DEAR GOODNESS!

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

TheOtherMe, did you see the football game this morning? I know that's not in your top rung of sports, but it's still an amazing win. 

[cooper88]

Pink Cashmere I just did a quick Google search. Hummingbirds are a sign that loved ones are near, messages from angels, and that a hard time is over and healing can begin.

[Deleted]

Sept 2, 2023 15:32:33 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Y’ALL!

I don’t know what it is with these hummingbirds showing up when they do. I am sitting in the shade in the garage with the door up, because I’m over the deck after that worm fell out the tree on me.

A hummingbird just flew a few inches inside the entrance of the garage and as usual, I thought it was a huge bug at first lol. It paused, and flew back out and off to the side of the garage door.

This is the first summer since we moved here, that I don’t have a lot of flowers on my deck. And before the last few weeks, or whenever I started talking about them, I’d only ever seen 1 for sure, maybe 2, period. And now, in the garage?!

Their amazing annual migration has begun.  Yes, it's still summer hot for many of us, but they are starting their incredible journey down to South Texas and Latin America for the winter.  Our garden centers here are stocked with feeders and food because they will be here very soon.

[daisylu]

So sorry Pink Cashmere . Sending up prayers for you and Mister.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

I’m sorry Pink Cashmere.  

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 2, 2023 15:55:27 GMT -5 seriousthistime said:

Sept 2, 2023 14:57:56 GMT -5 debthaven said:

  

please remember, you welcomed him into your home every other weekend, in spite of his antics and the stress it caused you.

His last memories of you will be you stroking his head and playing the music he loved.

You can be SO hard on yourself, Pink. PLEASE go easy on yourself, for once. 

I am so very sorry, Pink Cashmere .  

I echo what debthaven said.  Hold onto the goodness of the recent past, including when Mister was shaving his father's beard.  It's those poignant thoughts you should focus on, when you have a moment to think.  

I wish you and Mister peace and love during this trying time. 

I am glad for Mister, that even though things often went left, he did what he did by bringing his Dad to our home every other weekend, to spend time with him, care for him, and love on him. And I am very glad that I didn’t try to make Mister feel bad about all the chaos and stress when his Dad would come over.

When his Dad was here, Mister would be on alert like there was a baby in the house. On those weekends, he cooked breakfast, lunch and dinner for his Dad, even though his Dad complained that it was all nasty lol. He helped him shower, and just tended to him, overall. And he was gentle and patient for as long as he could be….. by Sunday, his Dad would have pushed so many buttons that Mister would struggle to keep trying to be patient. 

Aunt D said she’d asked her brother who had been keeping his face shaved and groomed, and he told her Mister had been shaving his beard and trimming his goatee, sounding all proud about it.

I hope Mister can hold on to all the things he’s done these last 12 months to try to be a good son and hold things together for his Dad and fix the financial mess his Dad hadmade, and all the things he’s done to try to take care of him.

I’m okay, because I never said a word about all the money spent cleaning up the financial mess and I never tried to interfere with anything else Mister felt he needed to do for his Dad. I did start avoiding his Dad, but I was still cordial and polite when I couldn’t avoid him. And it helps me, that I treated him compassion and love the last time I saw him.

Thank you so much for your kind words.

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 2, 2023 16:10:58 GMT -5 cooper88 said:

Pink Cashmere I just did a quick Google search. Hummingbirds are a sign that loved ones are near, messages from angels, and that a hard time is over and healing can begin.

Thank you for Googling it for me. I think I will decide that my Grandmother is visiting me and telling me I will be okay.

Because now that I’ve noticed the pattern, I do feel joy when I see them.

Thank you!

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Wow Pink I'm so sorry for you and Mister.

Encourage him to eat and rest as much as he can. It's going to be a mess and it doesn't do any good to exhaust himself

[NoNamePerson]

So sorry for Misters loss, Pink Cashmere Glad you are there for him 

[chiver78]

Sept 2, 2023 17:05:20 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Wow Pink I'm so sorry for you and Mister.

Encourage him to eat and rest as much as he can. It's going to be a mess and it doesn't do any good to exhaust himself

 and drink all of the water. it helps flush out the toxins brought on by stress. 

I'm so sorry for your loss. may Mr Messy RIP now that he's back with the love of his life. 

[Pink Cashmere]

FUCK!

A little birdie told me that Brother has visible physical signs that something is going on with his health. Signs that an organ is not functioning properly. He’s kept it hidden, Mister does not know. Brother is diabetic, like both of their parents were, and he’s not been taking care of himself. Mister and I both already knew he wasn’t taking care of himself.

I can’t tell Mister, but when I see Brother again, I know what to look for if he doesn’t do a good job hiding it, and I will ask about it. It’s not something he can fake.

That pushed me over the edge, into overwhelmed territory. This is beyond WAYYYY TOO MUCH! Shit.Shit.SHIT!!!!!

[countrygirl2]

Yeah sometimes the stress keeps coming. But it will end and once you sort through this all, it will get better.  There obviously was something going on with his dad, I'm still curious about the blood transfusion. I hope he does rest in peace as the last year has been tough on him apparently and everyone else. But remember, this too in time will pass. Now for Mister to get a respite or some peace in his life for a bit.

[Pink Cashmere]

OMG, I’m a mess right now. I wish they hadn’t even told me. I don’t keep secrets from Mister, and I don’t know how to look him in his face, knowing I am not telling him something important.

So on top of trying not to cry, I am also acting weird now, which I can’t seem to stop just yet, and which Mister is bound to notice eventually.

Even my regular solution for crazy days, when I just go to bed to try again the next day, doesn’t feel right this time.

[NastyWoman]

I was really hoping I misread your post Pink Cashmere but your follow up takes that hope away. I can only hope that brother pulls his head out of his *ss and starts taking care of himself. 

I really wish there were anything, anything at all, I could do for you and Mister but as is I can only send you my love and all the good thoughts I have.

[NancysSummerSip]

You went through s lot, Pink. In a way, I am not sorry this is over. You did not deserve the stress. You need to stay in a good frame of mind for you. DH and the brother will deal with this, and of course, you will be there. But put yourself first.

[Opti]

Sept 2, 2023 17:34:51 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

FUCK!

A little birdie told me that Brother has visible physical signs that something is going on with his health. Signs that an organ is not functioning properly. He’s kept it hidden, Mister does not know. Brother is diabetic, like both of their parents were, and he’s not been taking care of himself. Mister and I both already knew he wasn’t taking care of himself.

I can’t tell Mister, but when I see Brother again, I know what to look for if he doesn’t do a good job hiding it, and I will ask about it. It’s not something he can fake.

That pushed me over the edge, into overwhelmed territory. This is beyond WAYYYY TOO MUCH! Shit.Shit.SHIT!!!!!

Sorry about the possible next shoe drop. Did the little birdie let you know how bad it was? Hoping the damage can be reversed.

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 2, 2023 18:06:32 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

I was really hoping I misread your post Pink Cashmere but your follow up takes that hope away. I can only hope that brother pulls his head out of his *ss and starts taking care of himself. 

I really wish there were anything, anything at all, I could do for you and Mister but as is I can only send you my love and all the good thoughts I have.

I hope Brother gets his shit together and starts taking care of himself too. Once I get an opening to ask about it, I will bug him about seeking medical treatment and taking care of himself. I understand the little birdie’s reasons for asking me to not tell Mister, because they didn’t want to cause even more confusion in the family, but I will not make an agreement with Brother, to not tell Mister.

Sending your love and good thoughts means a lot to me, and is more than enough. I am grateful for you and other members of this little community doing that, and being so kind to me while I’m going through difficult times. That’s not a small thing to me, I sincerely appreciate the kindness and support from you, and all of my Internet friends here.