Tween girls

[Wisconsin Beth]

I found a Harry Potter themed "camp" for K.  It's 2 hrs a day, 4 days in July.  She's excited about it.  I need to book it and the vball session she wants from this provider.  I'll do it tonight.  There's some stuff I want to talk to my son about booking and I'd rather sit down and get all frustrated with bookings once and get it over...

[Wisconsin Beth]

Mar 12, 2019 15:04:55 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

I found a Harry Potter themed "camp" for K.  It's 2 hrs a day, 4 days in July.  She's excited about it.  I need to book it and the vball session she wants from this provider.  I'll do it tonight.  There's some stuff I want to talk to my son about booking and I'd rather sit down and get all frustrated with bookings once and get it over...

So I chatted with C about potential spring and summer "camps"  He wants soccer, swimming and all the fun "Digging with Dinosaurs" and digging for rocks/robots/electricity sessions they're offering.  Most of these are Saturdays and I need to figure out if they're going to conflict with the school soccer team that C also wants to be on. 

K also wants swimming this summer. 

My county recreation book is officially spring so swimming is going to wait until summer.  Ditto with the soccer and potentially vball for K.  Our availability, thanks to grandparents doing the chauffeuring, is greatly enhanced. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

God help me, we're having 4 11 year old girls sleep over on Saturday night.  5 if you count K. 

Current plan is arrival around 2ish; take them all to indoor play place that K picked out.  Home for dinner (tacos and quesadillas).  Movie and popcorn at home.  Bed.  Fancy pancakes for breakfast.  Collapse in exhausted heap after everyone goes home. 

What am I missing? 

[chapeau]

Booze for Sunday?

Tranquilizers for the girls? I’m pretty sure my mom wanted to duct tape my friends and I in our sleeping bags long before midnight. And probably after.

One thing to think about is what will C be doing during the party? Will he want to hang out with the girls or can you arrange a sleepover somewhere else for him?

[Wisconsin Beth]

Yeah, booze for Sunday is a given.  lol.  Also lots of Tylenol and a plan for early bedtime! 

C is going to the play place.  He's not being given a choice but wants to go anyway so that's not an issue.  I suspect he and DH will be either on the computer in the office or watching tv/movies in our room with DH.  I've done this with C before - he's fine as long as someone is in there with him.  So dh can watch tv with him or be on his kindle or even nap and C doesn't care.  DH may move the Amazon Fire box in there for the night, assuming we don't need it for K's movie.  I think she wants the 1st Harry Potter movie but it's subject to change as I don't think all the girls will want to watch that. 

[azucena]

I set the expectation with my DD10 that sleepovers means in bed by 930, done talking at 10, not whenever you feel like it.  This means it doesn't take a full day for girls/both families to recover.  It also means that I'm willing to have sleepovers much, much more often.  And there is likely more playtime the next morning instead of sleeping in, getting picked up, and going home.

Water bottles to go with the popcorn, then if it spills no big deal.  I also set out cut up fruit and veggies for healthy grazing and have yet to have any friend complain.

I agree with the suggestion of a plan for siblings.  I have two girls which makes it trickier.  Fortunately we have three families with girl pairs the same age!

[azucena]

Started THE TALK this past weekend.  We've done the girl puberty and she's read the boy body book.  We had some great preliminary discussions.  Got to the part in the book about P in V and she was like wait, what?!  And then she refused to hear any more.  I figured she might have an inkling from kids talking at school.  One preliminary question she had was what do boys mean when they talk about w-t dreams.  Explained that and she was like why are they talking about it?

Told her we would pick up the conversation this weekend, but can't just leave it at that.

[taz157]

May 1, 2019 10:54:08 GMT -5 azucena said:

Started THE TALK this past weekend.  We've done the girl puberty and she's read the boy body book.  We had some great preliminary discussions.  Got to the part in the book about P in V and she was like wait, what?!  And then she refused to hear any more.  I figured she might have an inkling from kids talking at school.  One preliminary question she had was what do boys mean when they talk about w-t dreams.  Explained that and she was like why are they talking about it?

Told her we would pick up the conversation this weekend, but can't just leave it at that.

How old is your DD that you gave THE TALK too?

So far, DD (she’s 7.75 years old) hasn’t asked how babies are made but puberty did get brought up when we were out to lunch with my dad. I’ve kinda explained periods as DD has seen when I’ve had mine.

[NastyWoman]

May 1, 2019 10:54:08 GMT -5 azucena said:

Started THE TALK this past weekend.  We've done the girl puberty and she's read the boy body book.  We had some great preliminary discussions.  Got to the part in the book about P in V and she was like wait, what?!  And then she refused to hear any more.  I figured she might have an inkling from kids talking at school.  One preliminary question she had was what do boys mean when they talk about w-t dreams.  Explained that and she was like why are they talking about it?

Told her we would pick up the conversation this weekend, but can't just leave it at that.

Aaahhh, the memories that brings back. DS1 asked me "you let dad do that? But only once right?" The kid was shocked to the bottom of his soul so my answer "well you do have a brother, so no not just once" was probably not the most diplomatic I ever gave.  It was the end of that conversation for quite a while...

[bean29]

May 1, 2019 7:48:39 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

God help me, we're having 4 11 year old girls sleep over on Saturday night.  5 if you count K. 

Current plan is arrival around 2ish; take them all to indoor play place that K picked out.  Home for dinner (tacos and quesadillas).  Movie and popcorn at home.  Bed.  Fancy pancakes for breakfast.  Collapse in exhausted heap after everyone goes home. 

What am I missing? 

Vacation Day on Monday?

[azucena]

May 1, 2019 14:41:43 GMT -5 taz157 said:

May 1, 2019 10:54:08 GMT -5 azucena said:

Started THE TALK this past weekend.  We've done the girl puberty and she's read the boy body book.  We had some great preliminary discussions.  Got to the part in the book about P in V and she was like wait, what?!  And then she refused to hear any more.  I figured she might have an inkling from kids talking at school.  One preliminary question she had was what do boys mean when they talk about w-t dreams.  Explained that and she was like why are they talking about it?

Told her we would pick up the conversation this weekend, but can't just leave it at that.

How old is your DD that you gave THE TALK too?

So far, DD (she’s 7.75 years old) hasn’t asked how babies are made but puberty did get brought up when we were out to lunch with my dad. I’ve kinda explained periods as DD has seen when I’ve had mine.

She's 10, will be 11 this summer.  We did the female puberty talk the summer she turned 9 in part because her body was clearly starting to develop.  We used the American Girl care and keeping of you for younger girls.  It's really tastefully done and seems to cover everything.  She read it by herself and then we went chapter by chapter and I answered her questions.  She wasn't self conscious about it because she was young.  Also glad we did all that before the hormone mood swings truly started because this past year I've become an idiot in her mind.  When she started her period this fall, I gave her the boy book to answer her question what do boys have to go through.  She hasn't asked any questions from it though and really didn't want to sit down together for it.  They did split by gender and had the puberty talk at school a couple of weeks ago.  She was starting to hear other things and was willing to sit down and have this more formal talk.  

All along I've kept DH in the loop and she knows that he knows what we've talked about and that he's willing to be as involved as she wants him to be - which is not at all at the moment LOL.

[chapeau]

I’m in my early 40s and I don’t want my dad involved in that discussion either. 😉

[alabamagal]

My DD was mortified that I told DH she got her period. Took about a year to get over it.

[Wisconsin Beth]

We survived the sleepover.  We had one cancellation due to family stuff so 3 girls, plus K and C.  I think everyone had fun.  We had some tears but that was mostly overstimulation and almost culture shock (quiet family verses our loud and yelling family) but other than that, it all seemed to go well. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

I took K shopping at Target last night for the dress she needs to for tonight.  Yeah, I'm floundering and lurching from 1 thing to the next right now. 

We ended up getting her 5 pairs of shorts, 1 swimsuit, 1 pair of flipflops, a workout top that she'll probably never wear to the gym as well as the sundress.  She's a size 16 in girls at Target. 

I need to schedule her annual checkup.  She's due for at least 3 shots.  We're on the standard vaccination schedule so this will include the Gardisil one.  Sorry, I can't get close enough for spellchecker to find out how to spell it. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

How comfortable are your girls with cooking/baking in the kitchen?  K likes having me around, sort of like a security blanket.  Or as a kitchen minion.  I'm not entirely sure which.  She reads the recipe and goes through it step by step.  She's not comfortable moving ahead, which I normally approve of but on Sunday she (and I) made muffins.  They were gluten free and dairy free.  The DF milk needed to sit with lemon juice for 10 minutes.  I was trying to get her to do that first and she was adamant that she do step 1, which was line the muffin tin with muffin liners. 

Baking with her is getting painful.  And time consuming.  I either want her to hurry up or to not want me in there with her.  So how comfortable are your kids in the kitchen?  Do they want you in there too?  Keep in mind that I alternate between being a helicopter parent and a free range parent...

[alabamagal]

May 28, 2019 9:08:44 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

How comfortable are your girls with cooking/baking in the kitchen?  K likes having me around, sort of like a security blanket.  Or as a kitchen minion.  I'm not entirely sure which.  She reads the recipe and goes through it step by step.  She's not comfortable moving ahead, which I normally approve of but on Sunday she (and I) made muffins.  They were gluten free and dairy free.  The DF milk needed to sit with lemon juice for 10 minutes.  I was trying to get her to do that first and she was adamant that she do step 1, which was line the muffin tin with muffin liners. 

Baking with her is getting painful.  And time consuming.  I either want her to hurry up or to not want me in there with her.  So how comfortable are your kids in the kitchen?  Do they want you in there too?  Keep in mind that I alternate between being a helicopter parent and a free range parent...

I was big on letting my kids do stuff in the kitchen. It is great learning experience and teaches them skills they need in life. If they mess up, it is usually not too expensive!

We had a few toaster oven incidents. Two of my kids were great in the kitchen. My ADD, bad at reading directions son was not, but we tried. His efforts resulted in banana bread where he forgot to put in bananas. He also could not figure out how to measure 3 cups of milk when he could only find 2 1 cup measuring cups😲. I guess he eventually figured some stuff out as his wife says he cooks now

[Chocolate Lover]

May 28, 2019 9:08:44 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

How comfortable are your girls with cooking/baking in the kitchen?  K likes having me around, sort of like a security blanket.  Or as a kitchen minion.  I'm not entirely sure which.  She reads the recipe and goes through it step by step.  She's not comfortable moving ahead, which I normally approve of but on Sunday she (and I) made muffins.  They were gluten free and dairy free.  The DF milk needed to sit with lemon juice for 10 minutes.  I was trying to get her to do that first and she was adamant that she do step 1, which was line the muffin tin with muffin liners. 

Baking with her is getting painful.  And time consuming.  I either want her to hurry up or to not want me in there with her.  So how comfortable are your kids in the kitchen?  Do they want you in there too?  Keep in mind that I alternate between being a helicopter parent and a free range parent...

I've been a big fan of "read the recipe all the way through before you start" and tell them you need to know if it's going to take you 3 hours and if that's in instruction/step #15, you want to know to not start this at 9PM. The 10 minute "soak" is a prime example of why. Do they listen? Not always, and it's so painful to watch. 

[raeoflyte]

My mom is much better than I am with letting the kids help in the kitchen, but I'm trying to get better with it.  I'm pretty terrible at following instructions, so I think the fact that she wants to start at 1 is fine, because by the time I get to step 3 to let something sit for 10 minutes, it could have taken me longer to get through 1 and 2 and now I'm worried I've ruined it and need to start my 10 minutes over again anyway.   

But I do get the impatience factor.  It always takes so much longer when they help than to just do it yourself and even though she's doing it alone she's still at that "help" stage of it taking longer.  Maybe you could have your own kitchen tasks that you're working on so that when she needs some hand holding you're there, but otherwise you don't feel like you're trapped.  Making bread, or organizing a cabinet.  Or an audio book maybe?  

I am hoping to have C comfortable making a couple very easy meals entirely on his own by the end of the summer and E able to make some more with help.  

[Wisconsin Beth]

My Mom is actually pretty impressed with how I'm handling kitchen/kid stuff.  I'm not sure on why, to be honest.

[giramomma]

One thing I wanted to add, is that DD1 is definitely more cuddly/clingly/demonstrative of the fact that she likes since she hit puberty.

Prior to then, getting a hug from her like once every three months was huge. She also preferred DH.

Now, she prefers my company a lot more.

[thyme4change]

My daughter was fine with everything, except opening the oven and putting stuff in and taking it out. She was petrified to do that. When she was smaller, I would do it for her, but once she was 14 or 15 I told her she was full size, coordinated and careful, so she would be just fine.

[swamp]

May 31, 2019 13:14:36 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

My daughter was fine with everything, except opening the oven and putting stuff in and taking it out. She was petrified to do that. When she was smaller, I would do it for her, but once she was 14 or 15 I told her she was full size, coordinated and careful, so she would be just fine.

DD is petrified of the oven.  She's 11, I'll cut her some slack for now, even though she is full sized, coordinated, and careful.   She's just neurotic. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

K isn't petrified of the oven but she is scared of it.  Some days she's ok with it, other times she's not.  She's got a favorite set of hot pads which I think helps her with the oven. 

[thyme4change]

May 31, 2019 13:17:11 GMT -5 swamp said:

May 31, 2019 13:14:36 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

My daughter was fine with everything, except opening the oven and putting stuff in and taking it out. She was petrified to do that. When she was smaller, I would do it for her, but once she was 14 or 15 I told her she was full size, coordinated and careful, so she would be just fine.

DD is petrified of the oven.  She's 11, I'll cut her some slack for now, even though she is full sized, coordinated, and careful.   She's just neurotic. 

We call our daughter's fear "anxiety". But at some point, I have to push her.

[Wisconsin Beth]

I'm taking K shopping for ovens/stoves today.  Our builtin oven died.  I'm not sure what/how I want to replace it so today is browsing to see options, sizes and pricing. 

[azucena]

So glad that I arranged my work schedule to take DD10 to special camps.  Like this morning when I woke her up 30 mins before we had to leave and she screamed at me that it was too early.  Then, she screamed at me that she didn't take clothes into the bathroom. Then, she screamed that I packed the wrong lunch, then was mad that I reminded her about a water bottle, screamed because I suggested taking pads and a change of clothes, screamed because we were late.  When we got there, she quietly asked if I'd wait until she found her friends - sure, I'm already late to work, mega late it is.

one of us may not live through the week.

[raeoflyte]

Jul 8, 2019 9:11:32 GMT -5 azucena said:

So glad that I arranged my work schedule to take DD10 to special camps.  Like this morning when I woke her up 30 mins before we had to leave and she screamed at me that it was too early.  Then, she screamed at me that she didn't take clothes into the bathroom. Then, she screamed that I packed the wrong lunch, then was mad that I reminded her about a water bottle, screamed because I suggested taking pads and a change of clothes, screamed because we were late.  When we got there, she quietly asked if I'd wait until she found her friends - sure, I'm already late to work, mega late it is.

one of us may not live through the week.

Hugs azucena!

[thyme4change]

Jul 8, 2019 9:11:32 GMT -5 azucena said:

So glad that I arranged my work schedule to take DD10 to special camps.  Like this morning when I woke her up 30 mins before we had to leave and she screamed at me that it was too early.  Then, she screamed at me that she didn't take clothes into the bathroom. Then, she screamed that I packed the wrong lunch, then was mad that I reminded her about a water bottle, screamed because I suggested taking pads and a change of clothes, screamed because we were late.  When we got there, she quietly asked if I'd wait until she found her friends - sure, I'm already late to work, mega late it is.

one of us may not live through the week.

My son yelled at me because I asked some innocuous question. LOL. Teenagers....

[giramomma]

I'm sorry.

Maybe have her pack her lunches and pack up the night before?

My kids are responsible for their lunches. Of course we help in 4K and 5K, but by first grade, they are pretty much on their own. We may verbally ask what they packed. Even at home now during the summer...lunch time is when I'm putting Miss M down. Even the peanut can grab an apple, string cheese and a few crackers to get her lunch going.