NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 25, 2020 15:56:30 GMT -5
DH is leaving me alone on my emotional spending for the most part. H said he trusts that I know our budget and if buying us books makes me feel better about the situation right now he's not going to interfere. Goodness knows he's spent more than his fair share over the years.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 25, 2020 17:13:36 GMT -5
Hooray. Mom decided to loose her spleen on me when I went to pick up the kids. All I do is complain about my job and I am not doing enough to be grateful or figure out a way to reduce her risk.
It was all I could get for a concession for this week and I barely got that from the company. I suppose I can talk to my boss about one day a week I take off till I've used all my vacation or I work 5am to 1 pm at least one day a week. I can't just up and leave my job over child care they will fire me. It has been made very clear that no exceptions are to be made. I got lucky and our HR person pushed for it to be a case by case basis.
DH finally got a concession to work from home every other day so that is something.
IDK what to do. Nobody in DH's family is going to agree to watch our kids, which I suppose is understandable. I guess I am going to have to troll Facebook and see if I can find somebody. My mom isn't going to watch the kids until the start of the next school year if it comes to that. She got pissed at me that she will have them for the next two weeks.
I get it my mom is in the high risk category. I just don't know what to do about it. I suppose if DH and I lose our jobs over child care at least then she will never have to watch them again.
Oh and DH's lender has said we missed a payment for March. Even though I freaking see a check that was cashed in our bank account that I sent thru bill pay. Where the fuck did that go? So now he's going to have to call them and I am going to have to figure out how to walk him through how to talk to them about it because he has never done electronic payments in his life.
I want to curl up in a ball and cry right now. I can't win for nothing in this situation.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Mar 25, 2020 17:42:55 GMT -5
More hugs for you, Drama! It doesn't rain but it pours. I'm so, so sorry you're having such a difficult time right now. Go ahead and cry. It may make you feel better. At least it will let some tension out.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Mar 25, 2020 18:25:35 GMT -5
I'm sorry drama. That's way too much stress placed on you.
I got a work email with COVID updates. It mentioned EA was available for people to meet with counselors if they were anxious or having problems dealing with COVID.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Mar 25, 2020 18:38:12 GMT -5
Drama, I'm so very sorry. I wish there was something I could do about the child care situation.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 25, 2020 18:57:31 GMT -5
DH took charge and made peace. It is still not an ideal situation. We are going to pay her I guess my dad forgot to mention that. I'm over here having panic induced heart burn. I wasn't deliberately being inconsiderate or ungrateful to my mom. I just have so much on my plate on top of trying to keep from having a stroke that it wasn't even on my radar. I can barely think enough to write a sentence on a sheet at work right now. I've been leaving my train of thought mid sentence, that's two reports I've done that on just this week. That's not good. I would think that if they decide to cancel school for the rest of the semester that at some point they'd have to do something in regards to daycare because you'll have untold people losing their jobs. If colleges are closed you could use all those class rooms for 10 or less kids and not have them come in contact with each other. Just a thought I am sure it is impossible fr some reason or another but it's something that crossed my mind. Absolutely NOBODY is being sympathetic to parents around here. I got a rare exception but it only lasts this week. Every other employer expects your ass at work or your fired. Some will allow you to burn your vacation. Some MIGHT give you leave without pay (but it'll count against you). Ridiculous. World is going to find out real quick if this goes on for as long as they predict that there are more of us out there that make the backbone of corporations than they think. Same with lower income workers such as servers and hairdressers. My hope is maybe we learn something, that this shakes things up enough people stop looking down on us "breeders" and those who make less. Doubt it but the human species has adapted and changed in the past. So maybe.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Mar 25, 2020 20:34:22 GMT -5
Good your DH is stepping up, Drama, and your mother knows now she'll be getting paid.
I know the child care routine can be crazily complicated and eat you up. On top of this COVID-19 disaster it's too much for almost anyone.
Have you thought about EAP as wvugurl mentioned? It can't hurt, and it's no cost to you. They're supposed to also help out with finding solutions for things like child care; it's not just for us depressed and anxious types.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Mar 25, 2020 21:07:53 GMT -5
Thought for the day:
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 26, 2020 8:14:32 GMT -5
Made a mistake of reading an article over on Current Events. New fear: My parents are going to get it, my in laws are going to get, DH and I are going to get it and my children are going to be orphans.
Or I'm left standing and everyone else is dead. Or my children become motherless.
All over the place now is news about people my age and DH's age getting sick. Then I read "Well you are all going to get it anyhow and likely die this is just a measure to make it easier to find a place to put your body after it happens. There really is no hope for humanity".
I know that's not literally what they say but they might as well. We don't need to go to Trump's level of sheer stupid optimism but fuck if you want people to cooperate you have to give them a reason to. If we're all going to get it and die within a few months then why should I care about flattening the curve? I may as well go out with a bang.
I don't think all the people ignoring the rules are idiots or assholes (though some are), I bet a lot of people are thinking the above. If the only thing i am going to get out of quaratining myself is there is a bed for my body to die in then why bother? If all that is left is a Hunger Games type wasteland with the rich living in Sector 1 what does it matter? I'm sure as heck not going to be living in Sector 1.
Then I keep reading I am going to have to live like this for 18 months. I can't do this for 18 months. I am not even sure I can make it another two weeks at the moment. I don't want to know what the world is going to be like if it has to stay ground to a halt for almost 2 years. I suppose Amazon will rule the world by that point since they will be the only employer left standing.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 26, 2020 8:46:02 GMT -5
While taking half days has not helped my anxiety in the least I do think it's probably been a relief to my coworkers. I am well aware I am not controlling it right now so I am sure they are too. Hopefully this gave them a breather before I am back to full time next week.
It's given me time to formulate a behavioral plan for myself to not be me for the duration of this while at work. I tend to get bitchy and/or spew verbal garbage a million miles a minute when I am anxious. Goal is to try to be quiet as much as possible for the full 8 hours at work. Not in an anti-social way but enough they don't want to kill me.
Been making sure to bust my butt and cram as much work into 4 hours as I can. It's the least I can do for the concessions they have given me. Also it's strategic on my part, it's never a bad thing to generate good office karma just in case they do decide to try to hold things against you later.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Mar 26, 2020 10:10:40 GMT -5
Drama, a suggestion. Stay away from Current Events and the news. We all know it's bad but to continue to read the doom and gloom is not helping you. It is increasing your anxiety.
I'm staying away from the news except for local news. I can't deal with it all day every day.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 26, 2020 10:16:26 GMT -5
DH got on me last night about reading news. I am not trolling CNN anymore but I am not sure staying away from the boards is going to work (it's all over here right ), this is kinda my only social outlet right now besides work.
I check my email for notices from the school so far there aren't any. I am skeptical they will be opening April 13th but we'll see. I check KETV once a day to see if anything changed in regards to resturant guidelines but I don't read any stories.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Mar 26, 2020 12:47:07 GMT -5
Drama, can you just stay away from certain threads? That might help control the onslaught input of the news.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Mar 26, 2020 15:17:03 GMT -5
Drama, can you just stay away from certain threads? That might help control the onslaught input of the news. This is my approach. I'm sure if my blood pressure was taken it's high. It's not good for my mental health at all to read those threads. I am thinking of starting one here about covid anxiety because anxiety and depression are not the same thing.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Mar 27, 2020 9:41:24 GMT -5
Don't read the online news. Just don't. I had to get out after reading a few stories. But, we made it to Friday, and I found a great picture to celebrate the weekend:
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Mar 28, 2020 8:06:36 GMT -5
And stay away from the Politics board....nothing but anger and hatred. Hence, that's why I hang out here in WIRR, SS and Your Money (OT). And if certain members make you crazy....BLOCK them!!!
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Mar 28, 2020 10:21:00 GMT -5
I don't go near the Politics Forum. Never have, never will.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Mar 28, 2020 10:57:07 GMT -5
I've been looking for pictures of kittens, when I found this image. I really like this cat, too.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Mar 28, 2020 16:16:19 GMT -5
And here's one to cheer everyone up:
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Works4me
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Post by Works4me on Mar 30, 2020 13:16:42 GMT -5
Drama - not sure what med they tried you on - have you considered something like good old valium or xanax? Something to simply take the edge off without messing with your brain chemistry.
I wish there was something I/we could do for you. Just know that you are special, you are loved and you are worth it!
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Works4me
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Post by Works4me on Mar 30, 2020 13:41:25 GMT -5
When I am overwhelmed and/or feeling worthless, when life is just too much, I try to think of myself as the baby my parents brought home from the hospital. Or as the little girl who so freely loved and was so loved. I try to honor my parents, family and friends by caring for myself as they cared for me.
For those of us from decent families, each of us was that little baby or that small child that was loved and cared for, just like we love and care for the children on our lives. It doesn't make everything easy and it doesn't make it all better but it helps.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 30, 2020 13:46:27 GMT -5
Drama - not sure what med they tried you on - have you considered something like good old valium or xanax? Something to simply take the edge off without messing with your brain chemistry. I wish there was something I/we could do for you. Just know that you are special, you are loved and you are worth it! Two of my coworkers have a debate raging about whether it would be ethical to slip Xanax in my morning tea. I said you can try but then all my work is on you because I'll be passed out under my desk. Living with an addict things like Valium and Xanax have to be carefully considered. If I felt it was between that and my sanity then we'd work out a way for me to have it in the house. At the moment I don't feel I am quite at that stage yet.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Mar 30, 2020 17:08:13 GMT -5
Drama - not sure what med they tried you on - have you considered something like good old valium or xanax? Something to simply take the edge off without messing with your brain chemistry. I wish there was something I/we could do for you. Just know that you are special, you are loved and you are worth it! Two of my coworkers have a debate raging about whether it would be ethical to slip Xanax in my morning tea. I said you can try but then all my work is on you because I'll be passed out under my desk. Living with an addict things like Valium and Xanax have to be carefully considered. If I felt it was between that and my sanity then we'd work out a way for me to have it in the house. At the moment I don't feel I am quite at that stage yet. I’m a big fan of Xanax. It’s takes the edge off but doesn’t make you dopey.
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Works4me
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Post by Works4me on Mar 30, 2020 21:07:08 GMT -5
I'm not sure how but there must be a way to safely have an rd if you need it. Could you maybe keep it in a locked drawer or locker at work? By only keeping 1 or 2 pills in your person, you could minimize the risk. They also make locking pill bottles that I have read about. I just hate to see you suffering and feel like you cannot get help because of your DH's addiction issues.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2020 8:49:34 GMT -5
Two of my coworkers have a debate raging about whether it would be ethical to slip Xanax in my morning tea. I said you can try but then all my work is on you because I'll be passed out under my desk. Living with an addict things like Valium and Xanax have to be carefully considered. If I felt it was between that and my sanity then we'd work out a way for me to have it in the house. At the moment I don't feel I am quite at that stage yet. I’m a big fan of Xanax. It’s takes the edge off but doesn’t make you dopey. Me too. I don't have my own script, but Ex 2.0 had some left in the medicine cabinet and every now and then...like 2-3 times a year...when I know I'm going to do something that would elicit a panic attack, I'll take one (actually I break one in half). Within 15 minutes I'm totally chill, but not loopy at all. There's only a few left. Think I might talk to someone about getting my own prescription someday.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Apr 1, 2020 15:00:44 GMT -5
I've done the same with DH's valium. Break one in two when I'm overwhelmed. It helps.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Apr 1, 2020 21:32:18 GMT -5
It's time to see the world from a different point of view: (Love this baby!)
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Apr 4, 2020 15:38:02 GMT -5
Not having a good day. Life sucks.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Apr 4, 2020 15:51:21 GMT -5
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ners
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Post by ners on Apr 4, 2020 17:17:49 GMT -5
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