We need to bring back the Flori-DUH thread!

[Tennesseer]

May 7, 2019 10:38:34 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

Apr 27, 2019 14:10:57 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

It’s not just Florida. DS just called from DC. A naked man was riding a bicycle around the White House. Cops responded so he rode his bike through the barriers that cars can’t get through. I wish he’d have videoed it instead of calling me. He said it was hysterical!!

Ok. I know this is now old news, but I want to point out that if you are going to ride your bicycle around the WH past the barriers, doing it nekkid would be the sane thing to do → at least they can't shoot you and say they suspected you had hidden weapons on you

The bike rider might think his weapon is rather sizable.

[NastyWoman]

May 7, 2019 21:49:31 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

May 7, 2019 10:38:34 GMT -5 NastyWoman said:

Ok. I know this is now old news, but I want to point out that if you are going to ride your bicycle around the WH past the barriers, doing it nekkid would be the sane thing to do → at least they can't shoot you and say they suspected you had hidden weapons on you

The bike rider might think his weapon is rather sizable.

Please no "mushroom" comments 

[toomuchreality]

[Tennesseer]

She's not smiling now.

Florida woman smiling in mugshot sentenced to 11 years in prison for fatal DUI crash



A Florida woman who smiled in her mugshot was sentenced to 11 years in prison Thursday following a fatal DUI crash last year.

Angenette Marie Welk pled no contest last month for when she drove with a blood alcohol level twice the legal limit in Florida and crashed into another car at 73 mph on May 10, 2018, killing 60-year-old Sandra Clarkson, Ocala-News reported

Welk, 45, was sentenced to 11 years in prison plus four years of probation, as reported by the Ocala-Star Banner. She also must write a letter every May — the anniversary month of the crash — detailing what she has learned from the events. Welk’s driver’s license will be permanently revoked once she is released from prison.

Article here: Florida woman smiling in mugshot sentenced to 11 years in prison for fatal DUI crash

[NancysSummerSip]

The picture of this fiend just screams "Flori-duh!" (or maybe "Flori-oooooooh!"). I mean, what do you say about that look? Um...interesting eyebrows ya got there, toots. How do you keep all that from melting in the humidity, anyway? Oh, and that FB post? Were you trying to actually get away with this?

www.wptv.com/news/region-hillsborough/tampa-woman-arrested-for-threatening-to-shoot-everyone-at-the-nearest-elementary-school

A Tampa woman was arrested after deputies say she threatened to 'shoot everyone' at the nearest elementary school.
Juliana Joy Cote, 26, posted on Facebook on Thursday with a picture of a small fake firearm threatening to shoot everyone at the nearest elementary school. Her home address was closest to Egypt Lake Elementary School.
Deputies interviewed Cote and she admitted to creating the post.
She was charged with written threats to commit a mass shooting or terrorism and is currently at Falkenburg Road Jail.

[toomuchreality]

May 19, 2019 11:33:33 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

The picture of this fiend just screams "Flori-duh!" (or maybe "Flori-oooooooh!"). I mean, what do you say about that look? Um...interesting eyebrows ya got there, toots. How do you keep all that from melting in the humidity, anyway? Oh, and that FB post? Were you trying to actually get away with this?

www.wptv.com/news/region-hillsborough/tampa-woman-arrested-for-threatening-to-shoot-everyone-at-the-nearest-elementary-school

A Tampa woman was arrested after deputies say she threatened to 'shoot everyone' at the nearest elementary school.
Juliana Joy Cote, 26, posted on Facebook on Thursday with a picture of a small fake firearm threatening to shoot everyone at the nearest elementary school. Her home address was closest to Egypt Lake Elementary School.
Deputies interviewed Cote and she admitted to creating the post.
She was charged with written threats to commit a mass shooting or terrorism and is currently at Falkenburg Road Jail.

Wow. Attractive! Just not very! 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Was she trying for a female Joker look?  Or Harley Quinn? 

[dannylion]

So this turned up in my Facebook newsfeed:   


Florida Man Threatens to Conquer Earth with Turtle Army


Unless these are unusually speedy alien turtles, he might want to reconsider.  I'm a gimpy, out of shape old person, and I'm pretty sure even I could outrun a turtle.  

[toomuchreality]

May 20, 2019 18:51:10 GMT -5 dannylion said:

So this turned up in my Facebook newsfeed:   


Florida Man Threatens to Conquer Earth with Turtle Army


Unless these are unusually speedy alien turtles, he might want to reconsider.  I'm a gimpy, out of shape old person, and I'm pretty sure even I could outrun a turtle.  

I'm not so sure I could! LOL  Well, maybe for ten feet or so. 

This guy makes me look normal!

[toomuchreality]

North Carolin-duh


Babysitters Arrested Over Snapchat Video Showing Kids Smoking Marijuana: Cops

www.insideedition.com/media/videos/babysitters-arrested-over-snapchat-video-showing-kids-smoking-marijuana-cops-46409



ages 18 months, 2 years and 3 years     -   The babysitters were 18 and 20, I think.



Not even amusing.

[toomuchreality]

Amusing....

Russ-duh

People Disguised as Bus Try to Cross Vehicles-Only Bridge on Foot


www.insideedition.com/media/videos/people-disguised-bus-try-cross-vehicles-only-bridge-foot-48451

www.insideedition.com/media/videos/people-disguised-bus-try-cross-vehicles-only-bridge-foot-48451

[NancysSummerSip]

I saw this and I really, truly thought it was Flori- duh. Close. Texas dudes and happened in Louisiana.

www.cbsnews.com/news/texas-men-die-trying-to-jump-car-over-drawbridge-black-bayou-bridge-louisiana-2019-05-25/

Two men died after attempting to "jump" an open drawbridge in Louisiana, authorities said. State police responded to a single-vehicle crash around 2 a.m. Friday in the water at the Black Bayou Bridge near Lake Charles.

Alejandro Cazares, 23, and Roberto Alejandro Moreno, 32, died in the crash. At the time of the accident, the bridge was closed to traffic to allow a boat to pass through, police said.

OK, it's not like the bridge was opening. It was open. Gates were down. One of them got out of the car and pushed the gate up to do this. I mean, they had time to think about this before the whole Smokey-and-the-Bandit thing got hold of them. It was not a spur-of-the-moment, "DUDE! Bridge is going up, so let's gun it and see if we can make it over!" Why would you even call this an accident? This is Dumb and Dumber meets the Darwin Awards. I feel bad for their families, but I also hope neither of them procreated. This kind of  does not need to move on to the next generation.

[Tennesseer]

Another happy DUIer:

Florida Man Appears Happy To Get His 5th Felony DUI

Ormond was charged with his 12th driving with a suspended license offense and his fifth DUI. He was also charged with leaving the scene of an accident and fleeing to elude.




link

[justme]

Reading this last page just makes me shake my head. The assholes who should stay in jail never stay, but we've got thousands sitting in jail because they had a little weed on them. At least they weren't actively doing harm to other people!


And to return on topic - you guys know there's a music festival in Florida now called The Florida Man?? Cuz there is. 

[Tennesseer]

Didn't happen in Florida but did involve a Florida couple:

Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

A woman bit a camel's testicles after the 600-pound animal sat on her in its enclosure at a Louisiana truck stop, according to authorities.

She had entered the enclosure in an attempt to retrieve her dog, according to the Advocate newspaper. The woman’s husband had been throwing treats under the camel’s fence at Tiger Truck Stop in Grosse Tete, igniting last week’s bizarre incident.

Full article here: Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

[toomuchreality]

Sept 23, 2019 19:48:52 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Didn't happen in Florida but did involve a Florida couple:

Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

A woman bit a camel's testicles after the 600-pound animal sat on her in its enclosure at a Louisiana truck stop, according to authorities.

She had entered the enclosure in an attempt to retrieve her dog, according to the Advocate newspaper. The woman’s husband had been throwing treats under the camel’s fence at Tiger Truck Stop in Grosse Tete, igniting last week’s bizarre incident.

Full article here: Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

This definitely qualifies! Duh!

[Tennesseer]

Sept 24, 2019 18:57:22 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Sept 23, 2019 19:48:52 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Didn't happen in Florida but did involve a Florida couple:

Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

A woman bit a camel's testicles after the 600-pound animal sat on her in its enclosure at a Louisiana truck stop, according to authorities.

She had entered the enclosure in an attempt to retrieve her dog, according to the Advocate newspaper. The woman’s husband had been throwing treats under the camel’s fence at Tiger Truck Stop in Grosse Tete, igniting last week’s bizarre incident.

Full article here: Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

This definitely qualifies! Duh!

CHOMP!

[toomuchreality]

OMG...
Georgia

Girlfriend finds out a month later, boyfriend shot her in the head! He didn't mention that little detail, as he cared for her at his mother's.
She finally went to dr and they found a bullet in her head!
😲😲😲

www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/he-shot-his-girlfriend-in-the-head-but-didnt-tell-her-she-finally-went-to-the-doctor-and-now-hes-going-to-prison/ar-AAHUYLQ


I don't normally post from my phone. I hope I did it correctly.

[Tennesseer]

Sept 27, 2019 17:13:54 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

OMG...
Georgia

Girlfriend finds out a month later, boyfriend shot her in the head! He didn't mention that little detail, as he cared for her at his mother's.
She finally went to dr and they found a bullet in her head!
😲😲😲

www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/he-shot-his-girlfriend-in-the-head-but-didnt-tell-her-she-finally-went-to-the-doctor-and-now-hes-going-to-prison/ar-AAHUYLQ


I don't normally post from my phone. I hope I did it correctly.

Came through just fine.

Story? Bizarre.

[toomuchreality]

Thanks, Tenn!

[NancysSummerSip]

Sept 23, 2019 19:48:52 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Didn't happen in Florida but did involve a Florida couple:

Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

A woman bit a camel's testicles after the 600-pound animal sat on her in its enclosure at a Louisiana truck stop, according to authorities.

She had entered the enclosure in an attempt to retrieve her dog, according to the Advocate newspaper. The woman’s husband had been throwing treats under the camel’s fence at Tiger Truck Stop in Grosse Tete, igniting last week’s bizarre incident.

Full article here: Woman bites camel’s testicles to escape enclosure after being sat on at truck stop zoo in Louisiana

We really need to learn to keep our crazy within our own state lines.

www.wptv.com/news/region-pinellas/florida-woman-charged-with-dui-for-drinking-white-claw-while-driving-home

PINELLAS COUNTY, Fla. — A Florida woman was charged with driving under the influence after being caught drinking a White Claw while driving home on U.S. 19 in Palm Harbor.

After pulling Morrison over, the deputy noticed she "had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath;" and that "her hair was in a nest, her skirt was sideways and her shoes were off."

Morrison, according to her arrest report, refused to take a breathalyzer test after telling the deputy:

"If I do the breath test it is an automatic DUI."

The deputy said despite refusing the test Morrison did admit to having a drink six hours earlier and two while driving home but argued:

"They are only 5% alcohol."

Morrison learned the hard way that those hard seltzer drinks, while they might not taste very alcoholic, can get you too drunk to drive.

Well, she is right about the 5% alcohol. And I understand they go down pretty easy.  I guess that's why they sell them in a 12-pack. AND why there's a national shortage.

[toomuchreality]

Sept 28, 2019 14:34:30 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

NancysSummerSip

www.wptv.com/news/region-pinellas/florida-woman-charged-with-dui-for-drinking-white-claw-while-driving-home

PINELLAS COUNTY, Fla. — A Florida woman was charged with driving under the influence after being caught drinking a White Claw while driving home on U.S. 19 in Palm Harbor.

After pulling Morrison over, the deputy noticed she "had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath;" and that "her hair was in a nest, her skirt was sideways and her shoes were off."

Morrison, according to her arrest report, refused to take a breathalyzer test after telling the deputy:

"If I do the breath test it is an automatic DUI."

The deputy said despite refusing the test Morrison did admit to having a drink six hours earlier and two while driving home but argued:

"They are only 5% alcohol."

Morrison learned the hard way that those hard seltzer drinks, while they might not taste very alcoholic, can get you too drunk to drive.

Well, she is right about the 5% alcohol. And I understand they go down pretty easy.  I guess that's why they sell them in a 12-pack. AND why there's a national shortage.

What? You can't drink and drive in FL? I'm shocked!  (Not really, but I guess she was.)  


They sell 12 packs there?  Wow. I think they only sell 6 packs (maybe 8, but pretty sure it's 6) here.  And we can't buy them at the grocery store. We have to go to a state liquor store to purchase alcohol over 3%. Grocery stores used to sell 3% Bacardi wine coolers ("those hard seltzer drinks"), but they've been taken off the shelves because under age drinkers liked them too much.

You're right. No wonder there's a national shortage...  (Is there?)   The folks in FL are drinking too many!  hahaha   

[NancysSummerSip]

Sept 28, 2019 18:22:15 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Sept 28, 2019 14:34:30 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

NancysSummerSip

www.wptv.com/news/region-pinellas/florida-woman-charged-with-dui-for-drinking-white-claw-while-driving-home

PINELLAS COUNTY, Fla. — A Florida woman was charged with driving under the influence after being caught drinking a White Claw while driving home on U.S. 19 in Palm Harbor.

After pulling Morrison over, the deputy noticed she "had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath;" and that "her hair was in a nest, her skirt was sideways and her shoes were off."

Morrison, according to her arrest report, refused to take a breathalyzer test after telling the deputy:

"If I do the breath test it is an automatic DUI."

The deputy said despite refusing the test Morrison did admit to having a drink six hours earlier and two while driving home but argued:

"They are only 5% alcohol."

Morrison learned the hard way that those hard seltzer drinks, while they might not taste very alcoholic, can get you too drunk to drive.

Well, she is right about the 5% alcohol. And I understand they go down pretty easy.  I guess that's why they sell them in a 12-pack. AND why there's a national shortage.

What? You can't drink and drive in FL? I'm shocked!  (Not really, but I guess she was.)  


They sell 12 packs there?  Wow. I think they only sell 6 packs (maybe 8, but pretty sure it's 6) here.  And we can't buy them at the grocery store. We have to go to a state liquor store to purchase alcohol over 3%. Grocery stores used to sell 3% Bacardi wine coolers ("those hard seltzer drinks"), but they've been taken off the shelves because under age drinkers liked them too much.

You're right. No wonder there's a national shortage...  (Is there?)   The folks in FL are drinking too many!  hahaha   

I've seen singles and 12-packs....never seen them sold any other way. No shortage here that I noticed -- my neighborhood 7-11 has them. Not cheap stuff, though. Almost $20 for a 12-pack. You can get a lot of rotgut beer for that kind of money.

[Tennesseer]

Sept 29, 2019 13:30:57 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

Sept 28, 2019 18:22:15 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

What? You can't drink and drive in FL? I'm shocked!  (Not really, but I guess she was.)  


They sell 12 packs there?  Wow. I think they only sell 6 packs (maybe 8, but pretty sure it's 6) here.  And we can't buy them at the grocery store. We have to go to a state liquor store to purchase alcohol over 3%. Grocery stores used to sell 3% Bacardi wine coolers ("those hard seltzer drinks"), but they've been taken off the shelves because under age drinkers liked them too much.

You're right. No wonder there's a national shortage...  (Is there?)   The folks in FL are drinking too many!  hahaha   

I've seen singles and 12-packs....never seen them sold any other way. No shortage here that I noticed -- my neighborhood 7-11 has them. Not cheap stuff, though. Almost $20 for a 12-pack. You can get a lot of rotgut beer for that kind of money.

Rotgut beer (and other rotgut alcoholic beverages) = rotgut behavior.

[toomuchreality]

Sept 29, 2019 16:15:38 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Sept 29, 2019 13:30:57 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

I've seen singles and 12-packs....never seen them sold any other way. No shortage here that I noticed -- my neighborhood 7-11 has them. Not cheap stuff, though. Almost $20 for a 12-pack. You can get a lot of rotgut beer for that kind of money.

Rotgut beer (and other rotgut alcoholic beverages) = rotgut behavior.

Hahaha... Agreed.

I don't do rotgut. And I don't drink beer. I have a hard time drinking wimpy stuff!

I used to ask my doctor for a get drunk pill. LOL

[NancysSummerSip]

Y'all have been very lax! So let me get the "duh" party restarted:

www.wptv.com/news/state/florida-woman-arrested-after-hiding-in-big-lots-ceiling-for-hours

37-year-old Kristina Perkins is charged with Felony Criminal Mischief, Petit Theft (3rd Offense, Felony), Possession of Drug Paraphernalia, Resisting a Merchant, and Resisting Law Enforcement without Violence.

According to the Charlotte County Sheriff's Office, deputies responded to the Big Lots store in Port Charlotte after a manager reported a shoplifter in the store.

The manager says that Perkins was seen going into the women's restroom with a cart full of merchandise.

When Perkins did not exit the bathroom, the manager entered the bathroom and observed tiles missing from the ceiling. Perkins was nowhere to be found.

The store was evacuated and deputies began removing tiles from various points in the ceiling, but Perkins refused to come down and moved to other locations in the ceiling.

Perkins' purse was found to contain three syringes and a spoon with white residue that tested positive for morphine.

OK, of all the places I am going to shoplift, drugged out or not...Big Lots does not exactly make my list. If I am going to do this, I am going to do it right and go for the designer stuff. And talk about getting high...she did. Right into the ceiling.

[toomuchreality]

Hahaha...
Not only does Big Lots NOT come to mind when I think of shoplifting, it does not come to mind when I think of luxury places to stay, or even budget places to stay! What the heck was she doing in the ceiling?
Did she think they weren't going to notice that the ceiling tiles had been removed? !
And she had to hear all the announcements made, to evacuate the store...

This lady definitely qualifies to be in this catagory!

Things that make you go, "Duh!"

[Tennesseer]

When I read the headline below several days ago, I thought to myself,  "Gotta be Florida."  I was surprised to find out though it happened in Spain.  Maybe the woman has visited Florida in the past.

Woman’s ‘box of sex toys’ contained her lover’s decapitated head

[toomuchreality]

Oct 6, 2019 15:44:11 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

When I read the headline below several days ago, I thought to myself,  "Gotta be Florida."  I was surprised to find out though it happened in Spain.  Maybe the woman has visited Florida in the past.

Woman’s ‘box of sex toys’ contained her lover’s decapitated head

HOLY MOLY!

I wonder why she kept it?   And what made her think it wouldn't be discovered?!  Oh, my word!

[NancysSummerSip]

Not exactly a Floriduh, but still pretty funny -- he is a friend of my dentist:

www.wptv.com/news/region-n-palm-beach-county/tequesta/tequesta-man-living-double-life-as-a-dentist-and-a-champion-wrestler

TEQUESTA, Fla. — What did you want to be when you were a child?
Were you able to make that dream come true?
One Tequesta man is proof that you can juggle two very different dreams at once.
By day, Dr. Jimmy McDowell runs his dental office on Tequesta Drive.
But by night, he runs circles around his opponents in the wrestling ring.
“I fix teeth by day and knock ‘em out at night,” he joked.
The 58-year-old has juggled this double life for years and is proving that you can do anything your heart desires.
“You can have your dreams fulfilled at any age,” he said.
His double passions started when he was a young child growing up in Arkansas.
“When I was 6 years old, everyone knew I wanted to be a dentist,” he said.
But that’s the same time wrestling caught his attention, with his family taking him to local matches.
"My grandparents were from a town of 300 people called Havana, Arkansas. At 11 o’ clock every Saturday morning they would come in off the farm and watch wrestling. It was in my blood.”
He trained in wrestling through college but chose the path to dental school.
It wasn’t until he opened his dentist practice in Florida - one of the hottest markets for wresting - that he realized couldn't resist...
"My patients were wrestlers and talked me into doing it,” he said.
After years in the ring and earning his nickname, he recently won his highest honor: A heavyweight champion belt from the Allied Independent Wrestling Federations.
Now, he’s getting challenges from across the country and world.
"I've been asked to go to Australia, Japan, Toronto, and London,” he said. “I’m still 5 days a week in the dental office, I do travel dentistry also."
That's why you'll find his wrestling gear in the office, in case he's called up for a match.

I can picture this....he goes from wrestling a stubborn molar to knocking out an opponent's teeth, then offering the dude a discount to fix the damage.