beergut
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Post by beergut on Feb 6, 2016 17:21:51 GMT -5
17 yr old is dress shopping.
The dress she wants is $460, so over $500 with tax.
Is this normal?
It sounds to me like they are preparing these girls for the racket that is the wedding industry.
On the plus side, maybe this is a good time to invest in high-end dress retailers?
I'm told if I shop online, I can find it cheaper, but those ship from China, which is apparently unacceptable.
My joke about keeping those starving Chinese children (we always heard about as kids) gainfully employed was not appreciated.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Feb 6, 2016 17:29:45 GMT -5
You can pretty much spend whatever you want. Mine were in the $100-200 range. Certainly not $500 for something you wear once.
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Apple
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Post by Apple on Feb 6, 2016 17:41:15 GMT -5
Yeah, dress price can vary greatly. And don't order one that ships from China! They are usually from websites that don't ship what they picture, I could sew better (and I don't sew). If you already have a trusted vendor, that may be different, otherwise: FWIW, I've never spent that much on a dress. The only reason I spent $80 on the one I used (in '96, so it's been a while) was because my friend's sister had bought it, then found out she couldn't make it to prom. She sold it to me so she wouldn't be out the money.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Feb 6, 2016 18:44:18 GMT -5
17 yr old is dress shopping. The dress she wants is $460, so over $500 with tax. Is this normal? It sounds to me like they are preparing these girls for the racket that is the wedding industry. On the plus side, maybe this is a good time to invest in high-end dress retailers? I'm told if I shop online, I can find it cheaper, but those ship from China, which is apparently unacceptable. My joke about keeping those starving Chinese children (we always heard about as kids) gainfully employed was not appreciated. I would assume it's fairly normal. Have you talked total budget yet? Hair, nails, purse, shoes, undergarments, boutonniere for her date? Is she splitting the cost of tickets, etc with her date or his or date paying for everything? I'd try to set a total budget and then work from there. Otherwise, the whole event could set you all back close to 1K. That said, 20+ years ago, I bought a designer dress (they only sold 10 in my city). I paid $250 for it. Considering inflation, I could see spending 450 on a dress..
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obelisk
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Post by obelisk on Feb 6, 2016 18:55:15 GMT -5
It is fairly normal, just 2 months work for a part time summer job for a teenager. If only she chooses to spend her money.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Feb 6, 2016 19:11:40 GMT -5
8 years ago, I spent $200 for a $1000 plus dress on Ebay. Another $100 or so for adjustments. $450 may not be completely out of line these days, but I bet you could find something just as nice for less than half.
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Feb 6, 2016 19:13:22 GMT -5
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Feb 6, 2016 19:14:51 GMT -5
anyone bought a prom dress lately? Hey, what a man wears in the privacy of his own home is no one else's business.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Feb 6, 2016 19:16:45 GMT -5
I know a lot of people who use rent the runway for weddings and black tie events. I was going to use it for my work gala but ended up buying a dress at a consignment shop. I do recommend renting, though. When else are you going to wear a fancy designer dress?
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Feb 6, 2016 19:20:54 GMT -5
My nieces swapped dresses between themselves and some friends.
Eta, they did get new ones sometimes too but I remember a couple of years ago overhearing discussions about who was loaning dresses aND who was busing new.
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emma1420
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Post by emma1420 on Feb 6, 2016 19:42:39 GMT -5
My senior prom was more than 20 years ago, and most girls spent between $150-$200 for their dress. I did have one friend who's mom spent more than $300 for her dress. So a dress in the $500 range doesn't surprise me. But, there are plenty of options for less than that. You can spend as much or as little as you want.
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Feb 6, 2016 19:49:28 GMT -5
Considering the young lady is not his daughter, isn't it the responsibility of the Mom and the girl to figure out how much can be spent? Same for choosing the dress and all the accessories.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 6, 2016 19:53:39 GMT -5
Consignment shops and the Facebook trading sites are other options. In our area, there is some group (Junior League, I think) that runs something called Cinderella's Closet. There are affordable prom dresses for sale. A lot of girls buy their dresses there . . . not because they are poor, but because their parents make them pay for it themselves. Lol. You can also rent dresses locally. My daughter rented a $1000 pageant dress twenty years ago for about $150. It was a bargain because we couldn't have afforded that (or your $500). It was really cool because they kept up with who rented what for what so girls didn't show up at the prom or pageant with the same dress. Duck tape also makes a nice dress. There is even a contest for it.
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Feb 6, 2016 20:06:10 GMT -5
It's been 13 years since my senior prom, and I think my dress was $250-$300 then. My junior prom dress only cost $20, so I thought it evened out pretty well!
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Feb 6, 2016 20:44:23 GMT -5
13 years for my wife and I too... She doesn't remember how much she spent.
Beergut, just give the kid 1k and tell her that is it!
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Feb 6, 2016 20:55:02 GMT -5
13 years for my wife and I too... She doesn't remember how much she spent. Beergut, just give the kid 1k and tell her that is it! Yeah, no. GF came to me to ask for 'help' with the dress. I thought we'd be talking about a $100-$250 dress, not something double that price. I don't see the point in spending $500 on something you're only going to wear for a few hours. GF said, "Oh, she can wear it for formal occasions in the future", but I think she is fooling herself. The particular dress she wants is a certain style that screams 'prom dress', not to mention the fact that I think it will be out of style in a year or two. I went online and looked at other retailers, pointing out that there are a lot of cheaper options out there. GF responded, "Fine, the next time you want to do something for $500 and can't afford it, I'm going to tell you no, that there are cheaper options out there." I kind of exploded and said, "When have I EVER come to you and asked for help because I couldn't afford something?!?!" She admitted I was right. I then left to run an errand with the 16 yr old.
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quince
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Post by quince on Feb 6, 2016 21:01:06 GMT -5
My dress was $30 19 years ago (old!). I think prices ranged more 80-200 in my peer group.
Shopping for an item like this, probably good to set a price range before you fall in love with a particular thing. Also being realistic as to what you can afford is a good idea, which doesn't seem to be a strong point with your GF and she's passing that along to her offspring.
$1000? Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Wait. Seriously?
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Feb 6, 2016 21:02:02 GMT -5
Granted, it's been 4 years since DD's last prom, but she went to a "real" bridal shop, & found a gorgeous dress for under $200. I'm sure prices vary depending on what part of the country you're in, but $500 seems a bit high to me. And, as others have mentioned, you still need accessories (jewelry, etc.), and shoes. You might need to rein in your princess a bit.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 6, 2016 21:05:54 GMT -5
13 years for my wife and I too... She doesn't remember how much she spent. Beergut, just give the kid 1k and tell her that is it! Yeah, no. GF came to me to ask for 'help' with the dress. I thought we'd be talking about a $100-$250 dress, not something double that price. I don't see the point in spending $500 on something you're only going to wear for a few hours. GF said, "Oh, she can wear it for formal occasions in the future", but I think she is fooling herself. The particular dress she wants is a certain style that screams 'prom dress', not to mention the fact that I think it will be out of style in a year or two. I went online and looked at other retailers, pointing out that there are a lot of cheaper options out there. GF responded, "Fine, the next time you want to do something for $500 and can't afford it, I'm going to tell you no, that there are cheaper options out there." I kind of exploded and said, "When have I EVER come to you and asked for help because I couldn't afford something?!?!" She admitted I was right. I then left to run an errand with the 16 yr old. What does the future hold for the kid? My daughter wore her junior and senior prom dresses more than a few times. There were the proms, of course, but there were also two school beauty pageants, the county Junior Miss Pageant (we rented one for the runway, but she wore the prom dress for her talent, which was playing the piano), and both for at least one sorority formal each. But my daughter knew she was expected to wear them again. We weren't cruel enough to make her wear the same dress twice to prom (LOL), but the other stuff wasn't "special." So she was cool with wearing them again. Donate $150 to the cause. Then let them find a dress in that price range or add their own money. But quit arguing about it. You argue too much about money. Set your limits and learn to say, "That's tough. I hope you can figure a way to make X work."
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Feb 6, 2016 21:19:02 GMT -5
13 years for my wife and I too... She doesn't remember how much she spent. Beergut, just give the kid 1k and tell her that is it! Yeah, no. GF came to me to ask for 'help' with the dress. I thought we'd be talking about a $100-$250 dress, not something double that price. I don't see the point in spending $500 on something you're only going to wear for a few hours. GF said, "Oh, she can wear it for formal occasions in the future", but I think she is fooling herself. The particular dress she wants is a certain style that screams 'prom dress', not to mention the fact that I think it will be out of style in a year or two. I went online and looked at other retailers, pointing out that there are a lot of cheaper options out there. GF responded, "Fine, the next time you want to do something for $500 and can't afford it, I'm going to tell you no, that there are cheaper options out there." I kind of exploded and said, "When have I EVER come to you and asked for help because I couldn't afford something?!?!" She admitted I was right. I then left to run an errand with the 16 yr old. I meant 1k for the whole thing not just the dress: - hair - makeup - shoes - jewelry - limo rental - etc. Give her a budget and tell her when it is gone it is gone.
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Feb 6, 2016 21:23:20 GMT -5
Donate $150 to the cause. Then let them find a dress in that price range or add their own money. But quit arguing about it. You argue too much about money. Set your limits and learn to say, "That's tough. I hope you can figure a way to make X work." beergut don't be cheap... Donate at least $500 to the cause
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Feb 6, 2016 21:30:49 GMT -5
Here we go again.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Feb 6, 2016 21:31:11 GMT -5
LOL on the limo. DD & her date didn't rent a limo for either prom. Actually, neither did most of their friends. Most of the young men tried to borrow their dad's car, so they'd have a nice ride.
But, it does cost money, for example, if they get their hair/make-up/nails done. I think they do more now for prom than I did for my wedding.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Feb 6, 2016 21:42:04 GMT -5
... I think they do more now for prom than I did for my wedding. Grrrr (remember Bill PG13 you must resist)
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Feb 6, 2016 21:46:49 GMT -5
If past postings are anything to go by, it really doesn't matter how much Beergut agrees to contribute, because GF and her DD will buy whatever they want to. And then GF will be short for living expenses and Beergut will close the gap, because this is for necessities not a prom dress.
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sapphire12
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Post by sapphire12 on Feb 6, 2016 21:47:14 GMT -5
I think $500 is outrageous for a prom dress. I know someone who bought a simple, but nice wedding dress from Nordstroms for $99. It's been a few years since she bought the dress, but still. I went shopping with my cousin for prom dresses about 5 years ago. There were plenty of nice dresses for under $500. Luckily she takes after me, she didn't want a dress that screamed prom dress so she could wear it again to another event if she so chose. Certain dresses scream prom dress; others do not. To each his or her own.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Feb 6, 2016 21:49:32 GMT -5
I think $500 for a dress is crazy. Especially since you still probably need alterations, shoes, hair, etc. But this just seems like another example of their bigger money problems.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 6, 2016 22:06:16 GMT -5
I cannot imagine spending that kind of money on a prom dress, but then again, I can't imagine going to prom.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Feb 6, 2016 22:22:56 GMT -5
I think mine was maybe $80?? 25 years ago, and yes, it screamed prom dress. The vast majority of them do.
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Feb 6, 2016 22:57:37 GMT -5
I've been where beergut is more than a few times and I think someone earlier nailed it. I like the idea of just saying "here is my gift" and leaving them to their own devices. If he is like me, he is probably going to end up helping, so it might as well not come with the fight.
But if they already have their heart set on the $500 dress, then anything less than the full amount won't be good enough.
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