suziq38
Well-Known Member
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Joined: Dec 22, 2010 21:11:27 GMT -5
Posts: 1,160
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Post by suziq38 on Mar 12, 2011 10:56:51 GMT -5
I wonder why you, with two children to care for would marry again and further subdivide your time by spending your precious moments with him. Your children did not need the added aggravation and having to share you. Because in a good blended family, your kids gain a parent instead of losing one. I remarried after divorcing DS' pretty much useless father and dating current DH for 6 years. During that period I realized why kids are brought into the world with 2 parents- it was SO much better to have another adult to help me puzzle my way through parenthood (DS was a bit high-maintenance and current DH knew how to lovingly hold him up to higher standards and make demands on him). DS would not be the fine young man he is now without DH's influence. DS says it. My parents say that. Even my Ex's family says it. I also think DS would have had a much rougher time getting through his father's death from alcoholism last year if DH hadn't been a strong figure in his life. So, I can see what the OP was looking for when she remarried. I can see your point. For me, this is how I view remarriage with kids. On the other hand, there is always "exceptions to the rule." You have a good DH and he is good for your family. The OP apparently does not have the same situation. I would still be wary about remarriage. Again, just me.
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Deleted
Joined: May 7, 2024 15:07:05 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Mar 12, 2011 11:07:07 GMT -5
I agree with you athena... but you find that after dating for 6 years, as you said, and slowly aclimating and learning just how the kids and DH meld... You don't do that by marrying someone off the cuff and hoping it turns out ok... and resenting him if it doesn't.
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Deleted
Joined: May 7, 2024 15:07:05 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Mar 12, 2011 11:21:15 GMT -5
I agree with you athena... but you find that after dating for 6 years, as you said, and slowly acclimating and learning just how the kids and DH meld... Absolutely agree. I know the 6 years beforehand made a huge difference and that remarrying quickly would have created a lot of difficulties, even though DH was the right guy.
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