ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 27, 2014 12:08:42 GMT -5
drivingaround, you are in a hole and you might want to stop digging. Just a friendly suggestion. Cyberbully.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Oct 27, 2014 12:10:14 GMT -5
I still remember the woman that was joking around & kept asking me questions about my black eye. Do she really think that my black eye had anything besides a bad story behind it or that I really want to share it with a random stranger?
Was this someone you knew, or a stranger? I'd never ask a stranger about a black eye, but if it was a coworker or friend I would probably say something like, "OMG what happened to your eye? Are you okay?" Same as I would ask about a broken leg. Honestly, my first thought would be some kind of accident, not domestic violence. Unless, of course, I already knew that person was having trouble at home. A stranger in the dentist's office.
I would totally understand if a friend or coworker asked. But I had no interest in sharing my problems with some random person. I think my non-answers left her uncomfortable, so then she started trying to joke about it
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Oct 27, 2014 12:11:19 GMT -5
Cyberbully.
Yeah, I can be kind of a bully/asshole when people start making wildly sexist generalizations and use the totes irrational behavior of grieving mothers to support them. No problem owning that one.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 27, 2014 12:17:24 GMT -5
Cyberbully.Yeah, I can be kind of a bully/asshole when people start making wildly sexist generalizations and use the totes irrational behavior of grieving mothers to support them. No problem owning that one. You should work on that.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Oct 27, 2014 12:21:11 GMT -5
You should work on that.
Eh. I got 99 character flaws but being a bitch about this kind of thing ain't one.
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drivingaround
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Post by drivingaround on Oct 27, 2014 12:21:33 GMT -5
Cyberbully.Yeah, I can be kind of a bully/asshole when people start making wildly sexist generalizations and use the totes irrational behavior of grieving mothers to support them. No problem owning that one. You should work on that. Perhaps sensitivity training is in order! I'll be the first enrollee!
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milee
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Post by milee on Oct 27, 2014 12:53:23 GMT -5
This is why it is just better to not ask personal questions of random strangers. You never know when you might hit a hot button topic & piss someone off. That is why I like the north east. people don't talk to each other. My friend from the north east just got back from living in Sweden for a couple of years for work. She said the Swedish people were in some ways more familiar than Americans and in other ways way more standoffish. When I asked her to explain more, she came up with the perfect description, "They're perfectly happy to sit naked next to you at the public pool but they don't say 'hello' in the grocery store."
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cael
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Post by cael on Oct 27, 2014 13:12:05 GMT -5
There are naked people at the public pools in Sweden? Sweden, where they have tall gorgeous Nordic dudes? (and ladies?)
::looking up flights to Sweden::
Even better that they won't talk to me, less awkward!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 27, 2014 18:57:48 GMT -5
You should work on that.
Eh. I got 99 character flaws but being a bitch about this kind of thing ain't one. Jay-Z?!
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 27, 2014 22:49:12 GMT -5
I still remember the woman that was joking around & kept asking me questions about my black eye. Do she really think that my black eye had anything besides a bad story behind it or that I really want to share it with a random stranger?
Was this someone you knew, or a stranger? I'd never ask a stranger about a black eye, but if it was a coworker or friend I would probably say something like, "OMG what happened to your eye? Are you okay?" Same as I would ask about a broken leg. Honestly, my first thought would be some kind of accident, not domestic violence. Unless, of course, I already knew that person was having trouble at home. A stranger in the dentist's office.
I would totally understand if a friend or coworker asked. But I had no interest in sharing my problems with some random person. I think my non-answers left her uncomfortable, so then she started trying to joke about it
I am not going to justify a prying stranger, but...I have a rule in life - 9 times out of 10 (if not more) what people say to you has waaaayyy more to do with them than with you. She might have just been in a situation, or was dealing with her daughter's/sister's/friend's situation and felt like she could help you or save you. It sure doesn't make it her business, but you probably had the halo effect about her caring about some other situation that she attached to your situation, and therefore she cared about you. You did the right thing to blow her off.
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teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on Oct 28, 2014 9:05:10 GMT -5
This is why it is just better to not ask personal questions of random strangers. You never know when you might hit a hot button topic & piss someone off. That is why I like the north east. people don't talk to each other. Um, what? Maybe in the BIG cities right on the coast, but that is definitely not true in my area. We are so known for being "friendly" - remember Beerwench?
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cael
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Post by cael on Oct 28, 2014 11:39:14 GMT -5
I'm thinking Arch means New England more specifically... or maybe just MA/CT because that's a thing (and probably NYC too I guess?) Massholes are so named for a reason!
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 28, 2014 17:21:46 GMT -5
I'm thinking Arch means New England more specifically... or maybe just MA/CT because that's a thing (and probably NYC too I guess?) Massholes are so named for a reason! True. East Nowhere NY is more like the south in a lot of ways.
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Spellbound454
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Post by Spellbound454 on Oct 28, 2014 17:45:40 GMT -5
This mommy wars thing is stupid You have a competition to see whose child can walk/talk/crawl.. first If you don't breastfed for at least a year......your child is on the verge of deprivation You have got people sending their kids to school in expensive clothes....just to make others envious. You have got people bragging that their child is a genius just because they have spent hours teaching it the alphabet. You have got helicopter parents standing behind the swings... demanding that their child takes the next turn.
We can never be perfect parents......so there is no point in beating yourself up about it.
We are just the best we can be.... with the circumstances we have got........and each family may be different.
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Spellbound454
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Post by Spellbound454 on Oct 28, 2014 17:48:11 GMT -5
There is...and they have one of the most liberal attitudes to sex in Europe and the lowest pregnancy rates.
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teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on Oct 28, 2014 21:53:39 GMT -5
I'm thinking Arch means New England more specifically... or maybe just MA/CT because that's a thing (and probably NYC too I guess?) Massholes are so named for a reason! True. East West Nowhere NY is more like the south in a lot of ways, except for that whole blizzard season thing.Fixed it for you.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Oct 29, 2014 7:38:54 GMT -5
This mommy wars thing is stupid You have a competition to see whose child can walk/talk/crawl.. firstIf you don't breastfed for at least a year......your child is on the verge of deprivation You have got people sending their kids to school in expensive clothes....just to make others envious. You have got people bragging that their child is a genius just because they have spent hours teaching it the alphabet. You have got helicopter parents standing behind the swings... demanding that their child takes the next turn. We can never be perfect parents......so there is no point in beating yourself up about it. We are just the best we can be.... with the circumstances we have got........and each family may be different. And you find that the older the mother gets the younger the child did all of these things. Some babies popped out walking and talking by the time the mother is 45 That is if she had kiddo in her 20's. If she waited till 40's then the kiddo was doing all this before birth
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Oct 29, 2014 14:47:06 GMT -5
This mommy wars thing is stupid You have a competition to see whose child can walk/talk/crawl.. firstIf you don't breastfed for at least a year......your child is on the verge of deprivation You have got people sending their kids to school in expensive clothes....just to make others envious. You have got people bragging that their child is a genius just because they have spent hours teaching it the alphabet. You have got helicopter parents standing behind the swings... demanding that their child takes the next turn. We can never be perfect parents......so there is no point in beating yourself up about it. We are just the best we can be.... with the circumstances we have got........and each family may be different. And you find that the older the mother gets the younger the child did all of these things. Some babies popped out walking and talking by the time the mother is 45 That is if she had kiddo in her 20's. If she waited till 40's then the kiddo was doing all this before birth I have been surprised by the number of people that have told me their kid took his first steps on their first birthday. Apparently it doesn't happen the day before or the day after very often, but very commonly the kid chooses their bday to start walking.
I had to laugh though. My coworker has a baby 6 weeks older than DS2. They started walking at the same time, within just a few days of each other - DS2 was 10 months, their kid was 11.5. I could care less because my other 2 didn't start until 14 months. But, the look on this guys face when he learned that my kid was also walking & was 6 weeks ahead was priceless. He is kind of a self-centered douche, so I found it hilarious that this bothered him.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Oct 29, 2014 15:12:24 GMT -5
LOL Winner! I have a friend who has a baby 6 weeks older than DD and it was the same deal -- I could tell DD walking first bothered her. But, she's the one whose kid was sleeping 12 hours straight at a month old. I'd trade an early walker for a sleepy crawler any day
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Oct 29, 2014 15:50:44 GMT -5
According to Gwen's baby book she has a suspicious amount of milestones in October 2011. I couldn't remember exact dates for things so I made them up.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Oct 29, 2014 16:08:03 GMT -5
You kept a baby book, you're way ahead of yours truly. I know Babybird walked/ran before her first birthday but I couldn't tell you the exact month if you had a gun to my head.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Oct 29, 2014 16:59:21 GMT -5
DQ, I have a baby book and I noticed my Mom went in spurts in filling it out. As much as I wish there was more in it and possibly more accurate, I'm sure just raising a child comes first most of the time.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Oct 29, 2014 19:21:55 GMT -5
I can remember the exact circumstances that my son decided on his own that he had to poo poo in the potty. He announced it with a den full of guest. But I was so proud that he let me know instead of pulling off his "big boy pants" and bringing them to me. Nothing like knowing they are finally potty trained. Oh and since I am really old this took place when he was 3 months old See there I told you they do things earlier as we get older!!
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Oct 29, 2014 20:39:30 GMT -5
According to Gwen's baby book she has a suspicious amount of milestones in October 2011. I couldn't remember exact dates for things so I made them up. For when my mom couldn't remember the dates for my baby book, she wrote "on schedule".
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Oct 30, 2014 10:04:59 GMT -5
I had a neighbor when DS was born who had a daughter born on the exact same day - same doctor, same hospital. It was weird.
DS started walking early (can't remember the exact month) but he had no control. We had to put the coffee table in the attic because he would struggle to his feet and then launch himself across the room, arms pinwheeling, laughing hysterically, and then falling down. Like a little drunk man. So while he was up on his feet lurching around, I wouldn't call that actually 'walking.' The neighbor's girl didn't attempt to walk until a good five months later, but she was a cautious child. She didn't try to walk until she was 100% certain she would not fall on her ass - or her face. So she waited until she could walk daintly all around the room and never fall down.
So if you actually compare the dates when both of them could stand up and walk on steady feet in a direction they chose to go in and arrive there still on their feet - it was probably at about the same time.
Most other childhood 'goals' are the same way. Yeah a kid might do something earlier than another kid, but does that kid really do it well? So comparing these dates is pointless - but you can't convince the helicopter parents of that.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Oct 30, 2014 10:25:33 GMT -5
Nothing like knowing they are finally potty trained.
I swear to God I will throw a party.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Oct 30, 2014 10:28:19 GMT -5
Nothing like knowing they are finally potty trained.
I swear to God I will throw a party. And then they regress when they start K4 and don't want to poop anywhere other than home.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Oct 30, 2014 10:32:05 GMT -5
Nothing like knowing they are finally potty trained.
I swear to God I will throw a party. And then they regress when they start K4 and don't want to poop anywhere other than home. SSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No one appreciates you spreading terrifying rumors just because it's almost Halloween, missy.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Oct 30, 2014 10:33:27 GMT -5
You kept a baby book, you're way ahead of yours truly. I know Babybird walked/ran before her first birthday but I couldn't tell you the exact month if you had a gun to my head. Shit. I'm supposed to know dates of when stuff happened? I can tell you DS started walking around 1 year. DD, around 9 months. Other than that, I got nothing.
I can no longer call myself "Awesome Mom"
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Oct 30, 2014 10:41:37 GMT -5
I think DD was walking around 9-10 months. She didn't crawl until she was like 2. DS didn't start walking until he was around 14 months. Definitely over a year. But he could crawl really fast and trying to walk just slowed him down. With the exception of DS's speech, they both were pretty average. Well, DD's speech was above average but we didn't really think much about it at the time.
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