Do you ask Guests to remove their Shoes?

[Deleted]

well since I don't eat or sleep on the floor, I'm not too concerned with what's on there.

Um, good for you? Not sure what to make of that comment. 

I'm glad your kids are never sick. At this point I'd prefer we agree to disagree. Because you probably think I'm anal, and I probably think you're gross, insisting on your right to wear shoes indoors, anywhere you go, even in other people's houses, even if they don't want people wearing shoes in THEIR houses. 

[Deleted]

OK, so I have a dumb question. We don't get snow, but we have mud and dirt. They tend to come off shoes when people use this thing we have called a mat. Is the mat a regional thing, too? If you guys have mats up there, why are these people not using them? Give me the scoop. Inquiring minds want to know.

We are in a temperate climate, and we put out a mat in bad weather. Sometimes for guests, but for us too. 

Some people spend great energy wiping off their shoes on said mat, some people step over it and never even realize it's there. It's a crap shoot LOL. 

[Lizard Queen]

Dec 4, 2013 21:06:49 GMT -5 milee said:

Dec 4, 2013 20:57:08 GMT -5 swamp said:

Most people take their shoes off at the door, but I don't require it. 
But my FIL always tracks in mud, snow, amd dirt. I wish he would talks his shoes off. 

OK, so I have a dumb question. We don't get snow, but we have mud and dirt. They tend to come off shoes when people use this thing we have called a mat. Is the mat a regional thing, too? If you guys have mats up there, why are these people not using them?  Give me the scoop. Inquiring minds want to know.

So, the thing about mats--if your shoes have a thicker tread, the mats don't take care of all the dirt. But, somehow, the dirt will come off an a smooth kitchen floor. I learned that one the hard way, and dh was none too happy with me about it.

[milee]

Dec 4, 2013 21:13:09 GMT -5 @debthaven2 said:

OK, so I have a dumb question. We don't get snow, but we have mud and dirt. They tend to come off shoes when people use this thing we have called a mat. Is the mat a regional thing, too? If you guys have mats up there, why are these people not using them? Give me the scoop. Inquiring minds want to know.

We are in a temperate climate, and we put out a mat in bad weather, for guests. 

Some people spend great energy wiping off their shoes on said mat, some people step over it and never even realize it's there. It's a crap shoot LOL. 

Huh. Now that would strike me as rude.  Obviously there are huge differences in regional norms for whether shoes should be worn in the house, but as far as I know there is no area in which it is acceptable to knowingly track mud into someone's house.  It would seem we could all at least agree that for people that wear shoes, they need to make sure they wipe their shoes on the mat before entering.

[Peace Of Mind]

Dec 4, 2013 18:10:38 GMT -5 milee said:

Yes, regional thing again. Around here it's more the hicks that take their shoes off. Around the YC, it would be one of those whispered insults that "so and so walks around barefoot" in the house (implying she's low class...)  It would be even more of an insult to take your shoes off in someone's house - it's making yourself too at home and possibly spreading nasty foot germs around and making other people look at your feet.

Even on the boats, it's a class issue who sails/boats barefoot vs. wearing shoes.  The knarled heathens go barefoot and we all get to see their yellow toenails and toe hair.  The "civilized" group wears tech shoes.

LMAO!!!  Is that a typo or did you mean to post this?  I've lived here for over 40 years and have been to many rich people's homes (some live in mansions) and I've been where you live (very casual area!) and that is not a true statement at all.  But thanks for cracking me up! 

[Deleted]

Huh. Now that would strike me as rude.

Milee, do you mean stepping over the mat? The few people that do that aren't trying to be rude, they are just oblivious. We have a very small entrance and often the people who do that are bigger guys. 

Which is again why we never TELL anybody to take their shoes off. But we definitely appreciate the people who wipe their feet well, or opt to take their outdoor shoes off. 

[milee]

Dec 4, 2013 21:18:29 GMT -5 Peace Of Mind said:

Dec 4, 2013 18:10:38 GMT -5 milee said:

Yes, regional thing again. Around here it's more the hicks that take their shoes off. Around the YC, it would be one of those whispered insults that "so and so walks around barefoot" in the house (implying she's low class...)  It would be even more of an insult to take your shoes off in someone's house - it's making yourself too at home and possibly spreading nasty foot germs around and making other people look at your feet.

Even on the boats, it's a class issue who sails/boats barefoot vs. wearing shoes.  The knarled heathens go barefoot and we all get to see their yellow toenails and toe hair.  The "civilized" group wears tech shoes.

LMAO!!!  Is that a typo or did you mean to post this?  I've lived here for over 40 years and have been to many rich people's homes (some live in mansions) and I've been where you live (very casual area!) and that is not a true statement at all.  But thanks for cracking me up! 

Nope, no typo. I can't think of one wealthy person I know in this area that has guests take their shoes off and few that walk around barefoot in their own mansion; it's even rare for people to have others take their shoes off on the mega-yachts (and it would be understandable there since regular shoes can scuff the decks.  But barefoot is considered so déclassé around here that most of the YC women I know own Sperry - nonmarking - heels to wear on the boats).  But I do know a few of the "wanna be"s that do.

I don't know every wealthy person or every poor person, though, so who knows?

[milee]

Dec 4, 2013 21:23:17 GMT -5 @debthaven2 said:

Huh. Now that would strike me as rude.

Milee, do you mean stepping over the mat? The few people that do that aren't trying to be rude, they are just oblivious. We have a very small entrance and often the people who do that are bigger guys. 

Which is again why we never TELL anybody to take their shoes off. But we definitely appreciate the people who wipe their feet well, or opt to take their outdoor shoes off. 

I mean it would be rude to track mud into a house. 

[Deleted]

Milee I think it's definitely a regional thing ... if I lived in FL I'm guessing I'd be hoping people took their flip-flops off before coming into my house. Because barefoot / in flip-flops in FL is probably EXACTLY like wearing outdoor shoes inside here. 

ETA: If their shoes were muddy, I would gently point that out, and ask them to please wipe their feet on the mat again. Again, that has never happened. I guess we really do have great and considerate friends! 

[milee]

For regular sailing, I wear tech shoes, but for parties on the big yachts, I have a couple of pairs of Sperry heels (Sperry is guaranteed not to mark decks) because it's considered low class to walk around on the yachts barefoot.

Not exactly the same, but these are similar to what I wear to yacht parties so I don't mark the deck but don't look like a barefoot hick:

www.sperrytopsider.com/store/SiteController/sperry/womensrowanheelbymilly/7-142530/catId/cat90048DM/stockNumber/9125667/skuId/***7********9125667*M080/subCatId/cat100154DM/showDefaultOption/true/productdetails

www.sperrytopsider.com/store/SiteController/sperry/womensharbordalewedgesandal/prod2350020/catId/cat90048DM/stockNumber/9680554/skuId/***7********9680554*M085/subCatId/cat100154DM/showDefaultOption/true/productdetails

[milee]

Oh, good. That little Sperry search I just did changed the ProBoards ad banner. Now it's for nice Sperry heels instead of the kinda random, weird stuff it's been over the past few days.

Back to the OP.

Thinking more about it, I've lived in 3 areas for an extended enough time to be invited to a variety of people's houses.  SW Florida, North Carolina and Phoenix, AZ.  In North Carolina, I don't remember anybody doing the shoe off thing, but most of our friends were either fellow college students or a few friends from work, so maybe not a representative sample. But in both FL and AZ, just like Thyme said, it's just not common to do the shoes off thing. Not just that, but it's uncommon enough that it would be considered impolite or odd. And we were in a fairly wide variety of houses in both AZ and SW FL, so got a reasonably large sample size. 

So this sounds like very much a regional issue. Although even within regions, there are probably certain cultures that conform to their own norms and not the region's.

[violagirl]

I never thought wearing/not wearing shoes would spark such debate! Here, you automatically take off your shoes if you are going into a home. Not if you are just in for a minute but if you are going in to sit down or something it would be considered highly inappropriate to just clomp on in in your shoes. Of course there is mud or snow most of the year so that could have something to do with our customs. It is when the guests are in the process of removing their shoes that the hostess can say No no it's ok, leave them on. Then if she is wearing shoes, you keep yours on, or if you have bare feet or something. 

[chiver78]

thank you for posting those links, milee. you saved me from having to eat my words. I will admit that I don't have much yacht time under my belt, but my knowledge of Sperry shoes is topsiders and loafers. without having seen the pics in those links, I was going to make a less than flattering comment about Sperry heels and people having more $ than they know what to do with.

[muttleynfelix]

Dec 4, 2013 21:06:49 GMT -5 milee said:

Dec 4, 2013 20:57:08 GMT -5 swamp said:

Most people take their shoes off at the door, but I don't require it. 
But my FIL always tracks in mud, snow, amd dirt. I wish he would talks his shoes off. 

OK, so I have a dumb question. We don't get snow, but we have mud and dirt. They tend to come off shoes when people use this thing we have called a mat. Is the mat a regional thing, too? If you guys have mats up there, why are these people not using them?  Give me the scoop. Inquiring minds want to know.

Our soil has a high clay content.  It doesn't just wipe off.  If I walk down to the neighbors' house during the summer, I get grass clippings on my shoes and those don't tend to just wipe off either. 

I find it interesting that people think socks are dirtier than the bottoms of your shoes. I can't figure our how that would be the case.

[Deleted]

Mats are just ok and we have them inside and outside all our doors.  If you have smooth sole shoes and live somewhere where you're mostly walking on pavement, I can see them working fine.  But I live in a rural area.  Gravel driveway, clay soil, the kids go out into the pasture with the animals.  It's just quicker to take your shoes off than take the time to make sure they're clean...and I don't care how good you wipe your feet you're not getting all the horse poop out of a treaded tennis shoe that way.

I find this argument over shoes funny.  I would have never guessed people would have cared so much about it.  Around here it's pretty much the norm with everyone I know.  A few houses are "shoe" houses, but you figure out whose those are.

[mmhmm]

We don't wear shoes in the house.  We have wood floors that are not hard to keep clean, but we just prefer not wearing shoes.  I'm not particular what guests do.  The rest of my family is like mother and I.  They shed shoes the first chance they get!

[zibazinski]

Up north where the weather sucks, I get it, but even then, the floors and houses are cold, to me anyway, so why would I want to be freezing my feet off in just my socks? If you're worried about your floors and not your guests comfort, don't entertain. Yuck, an area with smelly shoes that people have worn, just what I want to see/smell when I walk in a door. 

[NoNamePerson]

I don't wear shoes when I am home. I love being barefooted inside and outside. But don't ask friends to shed their shoes.

I also don't wear a bra when home but not sure I want ladies shedding their bras when they stop by - heck I usually put mine on when expecting company. Now if the they show up unannounced that's different  

[thyme4change]

Dec 4, 2013 21:07:48 GMT -5 laterbloomer said:

Dec 4, 2013 20:48:40 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

Houses here don't have a mudroom.  My parent's house doesn't even have a coat closet, which I didn't realize until just now.  I grew up there and they have lived there 35 years.  And they never needed a coat closet - LOL.

I remember my sister's houses in New York and Montreal.  They all had a cute little entry area where you could take off your shoes and hang up your jacket.  I can't think of a single house in Phoenix that has anything like that.  Often you come in off the garage into the laundry room - so I guess that room could do double duty if you are a "shoes off" family.

See, that's the thing. We ALL have those cute little (or not so little) entry areas for taking off our shoes and hanging up our jackets. I also have a very nice bench to sit on to put your boots or shoes back on. Other than geography maybe the difference is who does your housework. As the person that washes my own floors any crap drug in is more work for me. If I had a live in maid maybe I would care less.

Architecture is not taking into account who does the housework.  It is definitely a geography thing.  In a city that gets less than 8 inches of rain per year - it just isn't necessary.  I totally get why it is necessary where it is rainy and snowy. 

[Deleted]

Dec 5, 2013 7:14:59 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Up north where the weather sucks, I get it, but even then, the floors and houses are cold, to me anyway, so why would I want to be freezing my feet off in just my socks? If you're worried about your floors and not your guests comfort, don't entertain. Yuck, an area with smelly shoes that people have worn, just what I want to see/smell when I walk in a door. 

Lmao We must take better care of our footwear than you guys do.

[thyme4change]

Dec 5, 2013 7:14:59 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Up north where the weather sucks, I get it, but even then, the floors and houses are cold, to me anyway, so why would I want to be freezing my feet off in just my socks? If you're worried about your floors and not your guests comfort, don't entertain. Yuck, an area with smelly shoes that people have worn, just what I want to see/smell when I walk in a door. 

When I get up in the morning I put on my sneakers - even if all I'm going to do is walk around the house.  My back hurts if I spend too much time in bare feet because we have concrete floors - no give at all.

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

Dec 5, 2013 9:06:53 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

Dec 5, 2013 7:14:59 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Up north where the weather sucks, I get it, but even then, the floors and houses are cold, to me anyway, so why would I want to be freezing my feet off in just my socks? If you're worried about your floors and not your guests comfort, don't entertain. Yuck, an area with smelly shoes that people have worn, just what I want to see/smell when I walk in a door. 

When I get up in the morning I put on my sneakers - even if all I'm going to do is walk around the house.  My back hurts if I spend too much time in bare feet because we have concrete floors - no give at all.

We take our shoes off when we come in the door.  Anyone who comes into my house will know that -- those size 12 boats left RIGHT AT THE DOOR instead of under the bench are really hard to miss, LOL.

That said, we all have "house" shoes and/or slippers.  I am developing nasty plantar fasciitis -- shoes are an absolute must for me at all times.  Some shoes just never leave the house.  

[muttleynfelix]

Dec 5, 2013 7:14:59 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Up north where the weather sucks, I get it, but even then, the floors and houses are cold, to me anyway, so why would I want to be freezing my feet off in just my socks? If you're worried about your floors and not your guests comfort, don't entertain. Yuck, an area with smelly shoes that people have worn, just what I want to see/smell when I walk in a door. 

Why would your feet be cold in just your socks?

[muttleynfelix]

Dec 5, 2013 9:06:53 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

Dec 5, 2013 7:14:59 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Up north where the weather sucks, I get it, but even then, the floors and houses are cold, to me anyway, so why would I want to be freezing my feet off in just my socks? If you're worried about your floors and not your guests comfort, don't entertain. Yuck, an area with smelly shoes that people have worn, just what I want to see/smell when I walk in a door. 

When I get up in the morning I put on my sneakers - even if all I'm going to do is walk around the house.  My back hurts if I spend too much time in bare feet because we have concrete floors - no give at all.

I have a pair of cushy slippers that I wear around the house if I'm going to be in the kitchen a lot (ceramic tile). .... but then wearing anything with laces around the baby will drive you nuts. She just goes for the laces and chews on them and pulls on them and then she is underfoot the whole time.  It just drives me crazy. 

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

Dec 5, 2013 10:03:14 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

Dec 5, 2013 9:06:53 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

When I get up in the morning I put on my sneakers - even if all I'm going to do is walk around the house.  My back hurts if I spend too much time in bare feet because we have concrete floors - no give at all.

I have a pair of cushy slippers that I wear around the house if I'm going to be in the kitchen a lot (ceramic tile). .... but then wearing anything with laces around the baby will drive you nuts. She just goes for the laces and chews on them and pulls on them and then she is underfoot the whole time.  It just drives me crazy. 

Are you sure she's not really a puppy?  

[Waffle]

When I was much, much younger I used to watch news reports of violence and wonder how people could be so awful to each other. The older I get and the more I see how people get so emotionally invested in relatively unimportant issues like this one - I wonder how it is that we haven't all destroyed each other.

[muttleynfelix]

Dec 5, 2013 10:05:38 GMT -5 GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl said:

Dec 5, 2013 10:03:14 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

I have a pair of cushy slippers that I wear around the house if I'm going to be in the kitchen a lot (ceramic tile). .... but then wearing anything with laces around the baby will drive you nuts. She just goes for the laces and chews on them and pulls on them and then she is underfoot the whole time.  It just drives me crazy. 

Are you sure she's not really a puppy?  

    No.    Well..... what do you think.

[zibazinski]

    Because socks aren't thick enough to keep feet warm.

[zibazinski]

Awww.   She's adorable is what I think!

[Lizard Queen]

Dec 5, 2013 10:05:38 GMT -5 GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl said:

Dec 5, 2013 10:03:14 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

I have a pair of cushy slippers that I wear around the house if I'm going to be in the kitchen a lot (ceramic tile). .... but then wearing anything with laces around the baby will drive you nuts. She just goes for the laces and chews on them and pulls on them and then she is underfoot the whole time.  It just drives me crazy. 

Are you sure she's not really a puppy?  

I wonder that sometimes about my one year old.  He drools all over the place and likes to carry things in his teeth like a dog.  

Mutt--co sute!