formerroomate99
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Post by formerroomate99 on Sept 27, 2013 9:21:48 GMT -5
I think you're using the wrong definition of helecoptering. Helecopter parents, by definition, will turn themselves inside out to keep their kids from feeling any bad consequences for anything they do. They'll tear a teacher a new one if the teacher disciplines their misbehaving kid, instead of disciplining their kid. They are focused on the child's immediate happiness and hitting certain milestones, like getting accepted to a prestegious college. They aren't that concerned about the child's long term happiness or whether or not their kid is a decent person or what will happen to their kid after they die.
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formerroomate99
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Joined: Sept 12, 2011 13:33:12 GMT -5
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Post by formerroomate99 on Sept 27, 2013 9:41:19 GMT -5
First off, I don't think any parent isn't also bothered by their kids screaming. And a parent letting their kid scream for an extended periond of time in a library, movie, museum, high end clothing store or someplace they don't absolutely have to be, then I'd have to agree with you that it is probably an inconsiderate parent. But when I'm at someplace where you get the necessities of running a household (grocery store, Walmart, drug store), and hear a kid screaming, I don't automatically assume that the parent is just blissfully doing 'retail therapy'. Sometimes, things like food an medicine need to be bought now, you just don't have the luxury of leaving, and you just have to get through it.
And, as someone who has had multiple children with very different personalities, let me just say that some kids can be calmed and some kids can't. My first could be taken to the store when hungry, during naptimes, and late at night and the worst hting that would happen is some wimpering. My second can be well fed, well rested, and without warning will explode into an inconsolable tantrum so severe that he will bite his own hand hard enough to draw blood, bang his head hard enough to get a goose egg, along with screaming loud enough for everyone in the store to hear.
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Formerly SK
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Post by Formerly SK on Sept 27, 2013 9:48:14 GMT -5
I think you're using the wrong definition of helecoptering. Helecopter parents, by definition, will turn themselves inside out to keep their kids from feeling any bad consequences for anything they do. They'll tear a teacher a new one if the teacher disciplines their misbehaving kid, instead of disciplining their kid. They are focused on the child's immediate happiness. They aren't that concerned about the child's long term happiness or character. I tend to think of helicopter parenting as caring more about a child's resume than their character. The goal is winning the kid's division at swim meets or getting an A on their science project. The goal never seems to be the quality of the process in obtaining those achievements and the soft skills it teaches the kid.
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Sept 27, 2013 13:51:58 GMT -5
I thought a helicopter parent was one that hovers over the kid and is a bit neurotic about what happens to them. Things like they can't go outside and play with other kids because they'll get hurt, they can't ride their bike to the next block because they may get kidnapped or hit by a car, they can't eat sweets because it would rot their teeth, they can't go to little Johnny's because they don't know the parents "morals and teachings" or if little Johnny has a cold and their kid will catch it, etc. No? And I'm so glad those kids are going to have the law after them because that's not NEAR as bad as actually being responsible and showing up to fix their mess. I just hope the people who did show up and make an effort don't get included in the arrests. That would be awesome and the best lesson learned for those kids about being responsible and honest. Their parents ROCK!!
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justme
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Post by justme on Sept 27, 2013 13:59:14 GMT -5
I thought helicopter parents was a cross between the two - always hovering *right* there to make sure like Johnny doesn't mess up, but they're close enough to fix it if he does, close enough so no one "harms" them and right there screaming that Johnny should have an A not a B. A mix of over protective, living vicariously through the kid, and an inflated idea that your kid is the best at everything and everyone else is just jealous or blind.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Sept 27, 2013 14:02:02 GMT -5
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Sept 27, 2013 14:03:36 GMT -5
I thought that a "helicopter parent" was whichever poster doesn't toe the YM flavor of the month parenting stance.
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Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Sept 27, 2013 14:06:47 GMT -5
ETA: This was to JustMe's post. Yeah, that too, but my point was that they are always up little Johnny's ass so that he never does anything that stupid like trash a house owned by a famous person who has big bucks that can sue little Johnny's ass. I just read the article that one kid was neglected and this guy had him live there when he was younger trying to help him out. I suspect many of these kids are more ignored than hovered over but who knows.
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