Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 8:57:17 GMT -5
Wow. If that ain't a gold digger, I don't know what is! And how sad for her that she doesn't even want split custody.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 8:57:38 GMT -5
Yes, she will get alimony.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Jul 24, 2012 8:58:31 GMT -5
Not all states provide for alimony - it doesn't exist in Indiana, for instance.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jul 24, 2012 8:58:48 GMT -5
Any mother who would want to her kids, like this woman is doing....who cares how she survives. Hope she falls on her face in a gutter.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jul 24, 2012 8:59:38 GMT -5
How old are the kids? I'm sorry for the husband, esp. if this came out of the blue.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Jul 24, 2012 9:01:06 GMT -5
Maybe on the Alimony, but it's my understanding alimony is usually temprory if it's awarded at all.
Well, as long as the guy wants the kids they can at least agree on that. Poor guy.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Jul 24, 2012 9:02:10 GMT -5
I posted a thread awhile back kind of complaining about a couple I know where the wife is a SAHM who doesn't cook and the husband works like 80 hours a week so she can stay home with the kids. Well, the wife announced last week that she wants a divorce. She also said that she wants her husband to "take the kids". I'm so blown away right now. The husband is devastated of course. Will she get alimony? I have no idea how she plans to support herself. She hasn't worked in over 10 years. She doesn't have any college under her belt. I can't believe she doesn't want the kids. There is something else going on here. Did she not want kids and this was her concession to her DH? Is she depressed?
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 24, 2012 9:04:41 GMT -5
I posted a thread awhile back kind of complaining about a couple I know where the wife is a SA HM who doesn't cook and the husband works like 80 hours a week so she can stay home with the kids. Well, the wife announced last week that she wants a divorce. She also said that she wants her husband to "take the kids". I'm so blown away right now. The husband is devastated of course. Will she get alimony? I have no idea how she plans to support herself. She hasn't worked in over 10 years. She doesn't have any college under her belt. I can't believe she doesn't want the kids. There is something else going on here. Did she not want kids and this was her concession to her DH? Is she depressed? I agree there is something more going here. If her kids are that young alimony will be temporary if given at all. Perhaps she's found another man who will marry her only if she comes to him child free?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 9:05:57 GMT -5
SAHMs are ruining the sanctity of the institution of marriage.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jul 24, 2012 9:07:58 GMT -5
How old are the kids? I'm sorry for the husband, esp. if this came out of the blue. It was TOTALLY out of the blue. She woke him up in the middle of the night and said "I don't love you and I don't want to be married to you anymore". The kids are 6 and 4 (ish). Oh, those poor kids.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jul 24, 2012 9:11:11 GMT -5
Possibly.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Jul 24, 2012 9:11:21 GMT -5
I suspected she may have found someone else to marry. Why else would she want to the kids?
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jul 24, 2012 9:13:48 GMT -5
you know, I love my kids. And I admit to having days where I say I'd cheerfully run away and join the circus for the peace and quiet. But to actually do it, I couldn't. Although there's no way in hell I'd make it as a sahp either...
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 9:13:49 GMT -5
Most judges are a lot less liberal in awarding alimony than they used to be. Frequently it's temporary, although my lawyer warned me (when my STBXH was making alimony noises and I asked her about offering temporary support) that it leaves the door open to dragging you back into court and claiming it's not enough, they still need it, etc.
In her case, she doesn't even have custody of the kids as a possible roadblock to getting herself a job. I hope a judge would recognize that.
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Sam_2.0
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Post by Sam_2.0 on Jul 24, 2012 9:26:43 GMT -5
I know a lady that did this. Left her husband & three little kids, just ran off with someone else. Dad got full custody & mom didn't even schedule visitations for several years. She moved away to another state & wanted nothing to do with the kids. So so so sad
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 24, 2012 9:28:43 GMT -5
She's got another man, a rich one.
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Colleenz
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Post by Colleenz on Jul 24, 2012 9:58:53 GMT -5
Sad for the kids.
Here, alimony is basically a formula. If the marriage is less than 20 years it is one year of alimony for every three years of marriage.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 9:59:38 GMT -5
If he has the kids, won't she have to pay child support?
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 10:03:08 GMT -5
I wonder if we know the same person! OMG I know someone who just did this as well! I say good riddance since the woman I know is seriously bat shit crazy and the kids are better off without her in their lives.
I feel bad for the kids, I really do. You would just have to know how crazy this woman is to understand my response to her leaving.
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HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Jul 24, 2012 10:05:57 GMT -5
Man, I can't imagine dumping my kid. Not in a hundred thousand years. ;(
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 10:08:32 GMT -5
Man, I can't imagine dumping my kid. Not in a hundred thousand years. ;( Agreed. A parent should wait until a kid goes off to college or moves out before they do their happy dance.
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Jul 24, 2012 10:13:35 GMT -5
Look for the next update where she "accidentally" falls down the stairs . . . twice.
I think the previous question about whether she actually did want kids in the first place, is a very valid one. If she kind of "settled" and then kids were "what she was supposed to do" and she woke up one day and said "I only get one life".
Had they been fighting a lot? Has one been absent? There is so much we'll never see here.
Is she "trophy wife material?" There is a shortage of rich guys, so they have lots of options. Why would a rich guy want a woman who already has kids, and who is already used to being supported? I seriously doubt she is going to pursue a career now. Is she in good shape? Does she exercise regularly (or has she begun to?).
Waking him up in the middle of the night is pretty impulsive too. Then again, maybe she's nursed this feeling for years and he is just finding out now because he was too busy working his butt off for his family.
Its all very sad. Maybe she'll ride off with prince charming and have new children and be blissfully happy with a fairy tale lifestyle.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Jul 24, 2012 10:17:54 GMT -5
Man, I can't imagine dumping my kid. Not in a hundred thousand years. ;(
But you wanted your children. There are women who do not want to be mothers, but capitulate for their spouse.
I'm not saying I agree with it, but IMO it is better that she walk away than harm her children, either physically or psychologically because she was forced to make a decision tht she didn't want to make.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Jul 24, 2012 10:27:05 GMT -5
Many lawyers suggest this.
I know several women who voluntarily gave up primary custody of their children. One lady did it because she knew something wasn't right. I think it was depression, but she thought her kids would be better off with her husband who was very stable. Knowing her, I suspect she did the right thing. She still took her kids a couple days a week, holidays and vacations. She ended up moving to another state where her family lived, and felt the kids would be better staying in their home, their school and with their Dad. They spend summers with her. I don't know what message the kids will grow up with.
Another lady did it because her son and his Dad were super tight. She said "I just can't imagine him waking up in a different house than his Dad every day, and I cry about it all the time." The ended up with more of a shared custody agreement, and when he had to move for work, she moved also.
I guess I can't fault a woman for thinking it is the right thing to do any more than I can fault a man for doing it.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Jul 24, 2012 10:27:35 GMT -5
Totally agree that something is up. And for what it's worth it might not be another man. Could be another woman. For the wife, I mean.
I know a couple this happened to, BTW. The husband found out about his wife's cheating when he noticed a strange phone number that kept popping up on their phone bill. The wife left, but did something even stranger that dumping both kids: she dumped one and took the other. Imagine how those kids felt being separated like that.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 10:59:45 GMT -5
If he has the kids, won't she have to pay child support? Oooh, I like it! If the husband has been working 80+ hours, that would be a good explanation of why the marriage broke up. I went through a period when I was working 70+ hours a week and it was hell. I'm a stable, positive, organized person and it nearly drove me crazy. She probably got bored and frustrated with him gone all the time. Too bad she couldn't have encouraged him to dial back his workload, even if he had to find another job. Now he's going to have to do it anyway to be there for the kids.
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moxie
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Post by moxie on Jul 24, 2012 11:03:37 GMT -5
Well, the wife announced last week that she wants a divorce. She also said that she wants her husband to "take the kids". ^Not that my husband wouldn't be GREAT if he had our two, but there is NO WAY my kids would be without their Mama...they'd have to put me away in a nuthouse. I can't imagine not having my kids.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 11:03:48 GMT -5
Oooh, I like it! If the husband has been working 80+ hours, that would be a good explanation of why the marriage broke up. I went through a period when I was working 70+ hours a week and it was hell. I'm a stable, positive, organized person and it nearly drove me crazy. She probably got bored and frustrated with him gone all the time. Too bad she couldn't have encouraged him to dial back his workload, even if he had to find another job. Now he's going to have to do it anyway to be there for the kids. He was only working that much so she wouldn't have to work. She quit working before they even had kids. Sounds like the couple has had issues from before the kids. Having kids just magnifies the problems. It doesn't solve them, like so many couple hope they will.
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justme
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Post by justme on Jul 24, 2012 11:07:51 GMT -5
Sad for the kids. Here, alimony is basically a formula. If the marriage is less than 20 years it is one year of alimony for every three years of marriage. Is that automatic for everyone, or just spouses that stay at home?
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moxie
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Post by moxie on Jul 24, 2012 11:09:06 GMT -5
"Here, alimony is basically a formula. If the marriage is less than 20 years it is one year of alimony for every three years of marriage."
Interesting...
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