Zaire All About Nothing Journal

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

Zaire, I'm going to TRY to give you some suggestions on how to make your job easier so you can get things accomplished faster:

• Clean all clutter and papers that you don't need off your desk and into files/folders or desk drawer, so you have a clean workspace and won't have trouble finding things.
  
  
• Get all the paperwork you need for that one task you've been assigned, BEFORE you start to do it. This means any receipts, forms or paperwork, and information you need.
  
  
• Turn off your cell phone and leave in a desk drawer - or better yet, leave it locked in your car. Do NOT make or accept personal calls while you're working. They're a distraction and you can return those calls on your lunch hour or break.
  
  
• Stay focused on the one job you have to do and make sure you have all the documentation you need to go with it. Stick to getting that one thing done before you move on to something else. If you get side-tracked to answer a question or do something,for someone get right back to what you were doing before the interruption.
  

If you follow these steps your job will be a LOT easier to do, you'll be able to accomplish more, and you won't run into nearly as many problems.

Now it's up to you if you want to apply any of these techniques or not.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Frustrated
Subject: past time

you are not understanding my posts SL
my job is EXTREMELY EASY!! it is very boring
I'm NOT looking to make it any easier
I just posted they are stories of office employees doing stuff
it's not making my job difficult.
I've already said I'm caught up on current tasks and just sitting and waiting for new work which takes only a very few moments to complete
I've already cleaned the clutter off my desk
I've already put the paperwork into a pile that I have on my desk and currently working on that on pile to be filed away to clear off my desk even more.
I've already posted how I'm so over-pair for what I'm responsible for
I don't have to turn off my phone and I am allowed to make personal phone calls
Sometimes I will bring in a movie to watch at my desk to pass the time.
while watching the movie I'm working on other documents.
Your suggestions have already been done.

if you wanted to help - since you're searching for a problem you're imagining I'm having
here:

[Green Eyed Lady]

Mar 18, 2012 14:04:08 GMT -5 ZaireinHD said:

Mood: relieved
Subject: public invite

Thank goodness cause I read something else going on.
I don't have a problem posting personal
I'm simply posting my day as I would share with a friend in person
the stuff posted about work has already happened - so how ...
what I don't understand is why other members post the same thing
they get hand holding and compliments and hey lets sing a song
and it's the same stuff I post and I get told I'm....wait I forgot
I know I can't control the negative opinions nor want to
OH I'm told I'm miserable with every aspect of my life.
that's soo not true! but that's what's posted about me
and that's the general thought about me with the members
and posted by a popular member so of course when the popular members say something and it's taken as truth.
I don't have a problem with members posts there .....dislike for me
I don't see it any differently that speaking to someone in person saying it to my face.

I can maybe give you a bit of insight here, Zaire. At least on that one sentence. The things you post are generaly, at least from what I've seen, about cheating on your girlfriend; or at least looking elsewhere while you are currently in a relationship. That is offensive to most women and most men. I think that's why you get a negative reaction.

It's your business, of course, and I'm not judging. But you make it our business when you post it here so sometimes people are going to say something.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Frustrated
Subject: Repetitive Work

my job is so repetitive same thing day after day not much changing.
Sometimes I'm asked to copy a 60 to 100 page book. so most of the day is spent at the copier making 6 to 10 copies. How can I make that better?

Having trouble staying awake during the same times lately around 10AM to about 11:30AM! then again at 2PM. A strong wave of sleep comes around and my eyes close. I think that will be a problem when we move to the low cube walls.

So what can I do to stay awake in the mornings?

I'm not a coffee drinker. I've started to take stay awake pill. not much of a help but it's still too early to tell if that helps.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Frustrated
Subject: Reaction

Mar 18, 2012 19:20:08 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

I can maybe give you a bit of insight here, Zaire. At least on that one sentence. The things you post are generaly, at least from what I've seen, about cheating on your girlfriend; or at least looking elsewhere while you are currently in a relationship. That is offensive to most women and most men. I think that's why you get a negative reaction.

It's your business, of course, and I'm not judging. But you make it our business when you post it here so sometimes people are going to say something.

That's why I want to find the thread(s) on cheating in EE.
my thoughts on cheating is nothing compared to what others think cheating is
I was shocked that people came up with emotional cheating?
WHAT!
Men can't even THINK about another women! that's cheating!
that's ....

anyways the comment mentioned
let someone else post cheating on their wife - I mean actual cheating meaning actually having sex....oh wait can't do that here.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Funny
Subject: statistics post

Hmmmm.....funny right

[Green Eyed Lady]

That's why I want to find the thread(s) on cheating in EE.
my thoughts on cheating is nothing compared to what others think cheating is
I was shocked that people came up with emotional cheating?
WHAT!
Men can't even THINK about another women! that's cheating!
that's ....

anyways the comment mentioned
let someone else post cheating on their wife - I mean actual cheating meaning actually having sex....oh wait can't do that here.

I don't know anything about emotional cheating or what people were referring to. But I have read about how you are approaching random women in random places, trying to get someone to give you a phone number or whatever. I've read where you are having sexual chat with women on the phone (at least to my recollection). In my definition and in most peoples' definition, when you are in a live-in situation with a woman? That is cheating.

I'll butt out. I was just trying to reply to your question of why you catch holy hell here. There is a difference in the situations you post and the posters out there who are suffering from illness, loss, grief, etc. I'm not picking on you, judging you or being critical. I'm just trying to answer your question. That's all.

[femmefatale]

Mar 18, 2012 19:40:38 GMT -5 @rj said:

Men can't even THINK about another women! that's cheating!
that's ....

It is cheating when you are in a relationship. You really need to try Google.

He isn't married.

If thinking about another woman is cheating, a WHOLE lot of peeps are in trouble.

[Opti]

Mar 18, 2012 19:36:37 GMT -5 ZaireinHD said:

Mood: Frustrated
Subject: Reaction

Mar 18, 2012 19:20:08 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

I can maybe give you a bit of insight here, Zaire. At least on that one sentence. The things you post are generaly, at least from what I've seen, about cheating on your girlfriend; or at least looking elsewhere while you are currently in a relationship. That is offensive to most women and most men. I think that's why you get a negative reaction.

It's your business, of course, and I'm not judging. But you make it our business when you post it here so sometimes people are going to say something.

That's why I want to find the thread(s) on cheating in EE.
my thoughts on cheating is nothing compared to what others think cheating is
I was shocked that people came up with emotional cheating?
WHAT!
Men can't even THINK about another women! that's cheating!
that's ....

anyways the comment mentioned
let someone else post cheating on their wife - I mean actual cheating meaning actually having sex....oh wait can't do that here.

Zaire you are looking in the wrong place. I can't ever remember a thread here or on MSN EE/YM where posters talked about having physical affairs with someone other than who they are married to.
In fact, there have been occasional threads which have become discussions of emotional cheating or married folk who intentionally avoid temptation. The people who post here are not the average masses and with probably a few exceptions believe in fidelity more than average.

I know of no boards that discuss what you are looking for if reading about physical cheating is your thing. You could always join Ashley Madison or post ads like other folk who want to stay married and have some on the side. Personally that grosses me out and I would never be involved with someone like that. If I found out a friend of mine was into cheating they'd probably be demoted to an acquaintance or I'd disappear them from my life.

Oh, emotional cheating actually has a biblical basis. Do you remember President Carter and the incident about lusting in his heart?

(Cheating may be a common thing in your community. It isn't here.)

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Defensive
Subject: Explaining

Mar 18, 2012 19:50:18 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

I don't know anything about emotional cheating or what people were referring to. But I have read about how you are approaching random women in random places, trying to get someone to give you a phone number or whatever. I've read where you are having sexual chat with women on the phone (at least to my recollection). In my definition and in most peoples' definition, when you are in a live-in situation with a woman? That is cheating.

I'll butt out. I was just trying to reply to your question of why you catch holy hell here. There is a difference in the situations you post and the posters out there who are suffering from illness, loss, grief, etc. I'm not picking on your, judging you or being critical. I'm just trying to answer your question. That's all.

OK - that's cool GEL
I can see your point. But what you are joining in on is not understanding what I'm posting / mixing up what I'm posting. or maybe it just looks that way right now?
I thought in the same post of talking on the phone about sex while at work. I mentioned it was almost 20 years ago when that happened. I thought that post also mentioned I was still working doing my job and the call had no interference with me working at all. I thought that post started because I mention talking about sex at work with friend and family.

Then again now thinking about it there should be 2 posts that you're mixing into one remark and making it current times AND making it look like I'm currently talking to some other chick while I'm with current GF.

this is what members here love to do - partially read my post and comments - make/ focus one that one part - then twist it to a negative remark. one member is very good at that - getting things confused.

[femmefatale]

So, let me get this straight, Ric? If you had a live in roommate (gf), you are going to tell me you would never lust after another woman? If you say no...You're full of it. ;D

[Green Eyed Lady]

OK - that's cool GEL
I can see your point. But what you are joining in on is not understanding what I'm posting / mixing up what I'm posting. or maybe it just looks that way right now?
I thought in the same post of talking on the phone about sex while at work. I mentioned it was almost 20 years ago when that happened. I thought that post also mentioned I was still working doing my job and the call had no interference with me working at all. I thought that post started because I mention talking about sex at work with friend and family.

Then again now thinking about it there should be 2 posts that you're mixing into one remark and making it current times AND making it look like I'm currently talking to some other chick while I'm with current GF.

this is what members here love to do - partially read my post and comments - make/ focus one that one part - then twist it to a negative remark. one member is very good at that - getting things confused.

All right then. If I have misunderstood you, I owe you an apology. So I'll just ask you outright...

Have you been activly seeking out other women to date while you are in a live-in relationship with another woman?

If the answer is "yes", you are cheating and people are probably going to give you some crap about it.

If the answer is "no", then I have, indeed, misunderstood your postings and I apologize.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Defensive
Subject: Archive Threads

Mar 18, 2012 19:58:02 GMT -5 Opti said:

Mar 18, 2012 19:36:37 GMT -5 ZaireinHD said:

That's why I want to find the thread(s) on cheating in EE.
my thoughts on cheating is nothing compared to what others think cheating is
I was shocked that people came up with emotional cheating?
WHAT!
Men can't even THINK about another women! that's cheating!
that's ....

Zaire you are looking in the wrong place. I can't ever remember a thread here or on MSN EE/YM where posters talked about having physical affairs with someone other than who they are married to.

In fact, there have been occasional threads which have become discussions of emotional cheating or married folk who intentionally avoid temptation. The people who post here are not the average masses and with probably a few exceptions believe in fidelity more than average.

I know of no boards that discuss what you are looking for if reading about

Here we go again with you....
I simply said I want to find the thread(s) in EE talking about cheating. and here you go putting words...taking a direction that I'm not going.
perfect example of how you take what I said and twist it around.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Defensive
Subject: Friends Lost

Mar 18, 2012 20:26:46 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

All right then. If I have misunderstood you, I owe you an apology. So I'll just ask you outright...

Have you been activly seeking out other women to date while you are in a live-in relationship with another woman?

If the answer is "yes", you are cheating and people are probably going to give you some crap about it.

If the answer is "no", then I have, indeed, misunderstood your postings and I apologize.

I have been actively seeking other women to replace lost friendships with other women that I've lost over the years while living with my current GF.

[femmefatale]

ZAIRE, in all honesty, if you are looking to indeed replace this gf you have, don't you think it would be in yours and her best interest to just call it off and move on?

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: defensive
Subject: cheating trouble

Mar 18, 2012 19:52:15 GMT -5 @femmefatale said:

Mar 18, 2012 19:40:38 GMT -5 @rj said:

It is cheating when you are in a relationship. You really need to try Google.

He isn't married.

If thinking about another woman is cheating, a WHOLE lot of peeps are in trouble.

Hello Femme - I agree with you

that's why I'm interested in the cheating thread search to see what the members were saying
that's all I'm looking at
I'm interested in seeing what was posted about cheating thread(s) in EE

geez opti

[femmefatale]

But it's one thing to be openly admitting you're wanting to cheat and then simply just thinking or lusting...Dontcha think? Just saying.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: defensive
Subject: Friendships

Mar 18, 2012 20:35:42 GMT -5 @femmefatale said:

ZAIRE, in all honesty, if you are looking to indeed replace this gf you have, don't you think it would be in yours and her best interest to just call it off and move on?

you would be correct femme. it would be best to call off current relationship now especially since we are moving out in a few months.
However - I'm NOT looking for a replacement GF. I'm not looking to live alone. I'm not looking forward to dating again.

whether I've posted before or not. I'll say now
I don't like having male friends - male friends get me into trouble. I've always had more female friends than male friends. My friends have dwindled down to one guy and everyone else is 1 gone or I consider an acquaintance.
I miss talking and going out with friends and looking to meeting people. I've met guys - they are acquaintances - but if I were to go out with them - it's going to be to go out and meet women and if we become closer I'll get calls from their wife of GF as I'll be used to cover for them. just like in my past.

[femmefatale]

Mar 18, 2012 20:54:02 GMT -5 ZaireinHD said:

Mood: defensive
Subject: Friendships

Mar 18, 2012 20:35:42 GMT -5 @femmefatale said:

ZAIRE, in all honesty, if you are looking to indeed replace this gf you have, don't you think it would be in yours and her best interest to just call it off and move on?

you would be correct femme. it would be best to call off current relationship now especially since we are moving out in a few months.
However - I'm NOT looking for a replacement GF. I'm not looking to live alone. I'm not looking forward to dating again.

whether I've posted before or not. I'll say now
I don't like having male friends - male friends get me into trouble. I've always had more female friends than male friends. My friends have dwindled down to one guy and everyone else is 1 gone or I consider an acquaintance.
I miss talking and going out with friends and looking to meeting people. I've met guys - they are acquaintances - but if I were to go out with them - it's going to be to go out and meet women and if we become closer I'll get calls from their wife of GF as I'll be used to cover for them. just like in my past.

I understand, Z...But isn't it a bit unfair to be going out looking to seek out female friends or whatever when your gf is at home and etc..Does she have male friends like that and if she did, wouldn't it bother you or no?

[Green Eyed Lady]

whether I've posted before or not. I'll say now
I don't like having male friends - male friends get me into trouble. I've always had more female friends than male friends. My friends have dwindled down to one guy and everyone else is 1 gone or I consider an acquaintance.
I miss talking and going out with friends and looking to meeting people. I've met guys - they are acquaintances - but if I were to go out with them - it's going to be to go out and meet women and if we become closer I'll get calls from their wife of GF as I'll be used to cover for them. just like in my past.

You are looking at the wrong men for friendship, Zaire. Real men don't need you to "cover for them" because they don't do anything to need covering for. Not all men cheat. There are, in my experience, a very high percentage of men who believe in the one woman/one man philosophy. I'm not saying they don't look at other women. I'm sure they do.

I guess...just think about what you are doing and then consider how you would feel if it was done to you.

[femmefatale]

I would have to agree with GEL, on this one, Z....

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Relaxed
Subject: Talking

perfect - perfect - FN perfect
this is exactly what I'm looking for in life and here
were just talking -- nothing to get upset over

;D

[Green Eyed Lady]

I saw you post the other day, something along the lines of "she always interrupts me in what I'm doing to watch a movie" or some other thing. You indicate you don't really want to do things with her and that you appreciate what she does FOR you - like grocery shopping, etc. You indicate you keep her around because dating scares you and you don't want to be alone.

Let me ask you? If your woman didn't want YOU around or didn't want to do thing with YOU; or if she only wanted you around because of the things you can do for her...or because she's just afraid of being alone.....would YOU like that or would you be very hurt?

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Relaxed
Subject: miss some threads

this is what I miss about posting in the coffee shop
I was just another member talking about stuff relaxed
not accusing me of anything
it was great
;D

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

Ladies, I think you should quit while you're ahead. You're not going to change things. I was going to say the same thing about his covering up for his friends - that's just condoning and enabling their cheating, which means he doesn't see anything wrong with it. If he wants to lust after other women himself, he should at least have the decency to wait until g/f is moved out and he's on his own.

[femmefatale]

Well, lusting in your mind is one thing but seeking female attention elsewhere, well....I think it's wrong. Nothing wrong with having online friends but if he's out to just hang out with other females, then yeah that would be a problem.

Anyways, good luck, Z.

[ZaireinHD]

Mood: Normal
Subject: reply change

Mar 18, 2012 21:02:29 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

You are looking at the wrong men for friendship, Zaire. Real men don't need you to "cover for them" because they don't do anything to need covering for. Not all men cheat. There are, in my experience, a very high percentage of men who believe in the one woman/one man philosophy. I'm not saying they don't look at other women. I'm sure they do.

I guess...just think about what you are doing and then consider how you would feel if it was done to you.

cool - I treat others as I would like to be treated
or at least that's how I think of myself.
I've mentioned that how I put others before my own feeling
going out of my way to be helpful to others

but until recently MOB tactics - I've changed to I should be more concerned about my own well being - what makes me happy - only I can see what makes me happy and I should do what makes me happy and work on others secondary.

There are, in my experience, a very high percentage of men who cheat.

[Green Eyed Lady]

cool - I treat others as I would like to be treated
or at least that's how I think of myself.
I've mentioned that how I put others before my own feeling
going out of my way to be helpful to others

but until recently MOB tactics - I've changed to I should be more concerned about my own well being - what makes me happy - only I can see what makes me happy and I should do what makes me happy and work on others secondary.

I don't think anybody has said you shouldn't do what makes you happy, Zaire. The thing is? What makes you happy is probably very hurtful to someone you've made a commitment to. It doesn't matter if you are married or not. You live together as man and wife and that's a commitment.

So? If seeking out other women for friendship or dates or whatever is what you want to do and is what makes you happy? Say goodbye to your girlfriend and don't hurt her.

I just want you to understand the reasons why you sometimes get very visceral reactions to your posts. Women are offended because we hate being cheated on. Men are offended because they all have sisters, friends and mothers and they hate it when the ladies in their lives get hurt. And your posts, although you have said they were misunderstood, indicated you were thinking of doing just that.

See what I'm saying?

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

Then live by yourself. When you move, move into your next place alone. That way you can do whatever you want and won't have to worry about anyone else's happiness - but don't be chasing after other women until you're on your own.

[ZaireinHD]

Mar 18, 2012 21:20:16 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

I don't think anybody has said you shouldn't do what makes you happy, Zaire. The thing is? What makes you happy is probably very hurtful to someone you've made a commitment to. It doesn't matter if you are married or not. You live together as man and wife and that's a commitment.

So? If seeking out other women for friendship or dates or whatever is what you want to do and is what makes you happy? Say goodbye to your girlfriend and don't hurt her.

I just want you to understand the reasons why you sometimes get very visceral reactions to your posts. Women are offended because we hate being cheated on. Men are offended because they all have sisters, friends and mothers and they hate it when the ladies in their lives get hurt. And your posts, although you have said they were misunderstood, indicated you were thinking of doing just that.

See what I'm saying?

yes I see what you're saying
yes I understand why comments are being made and said regarding my relationship