Thank you all.

[marvholly]

I well remember my sticker shock when DD1 moved into women's shoe sizes.

A week or so ago I got a postcard from the Chicago Tribune that I would receive a FREE Sun Trib all the Month of Dec. It is VERY apparent that the delivery person has NOT passed the GED exam since a paper was delivered yesterday (I had bought one Sat). Too bad the coupons were TOTALLY uninteresting.

I think this is the first time in several years I have NOT used/gotten a high value Fannie May coupon ($10 on $10/more) for candy over the holiday season. It ‘might’ be too early but my holiday IS early.

[Wisconsin Beth]

My sister suggested to me on Friday that I might want to buy Nike or Reebok (better quality) shoes for C as she thought they might last longer.  I think I bought his previous pair of shoes in Sept. and they were pretty beat up.  Plus he outgrew them.  So I'm sticking with Payless if he's going to be getting new shoes every 3 months or so. 

His boots, also bought in Sept/Oct. are a size 13.  I need to replace those as he's now a 13.5.  I'll send the old ones to dcp or K's school, for emergency use for other kids.  I think I got them at Target. 

And I loved John Hurt as The Doctor in Day of the Doctor.  He totally rocked.  I think he's become my 2nd favorite Doctor, behind Christopher Eccleston.  Matt Smith, for anyone who cares, is in the bottom 3 for me.  Possibly even on the bottom.  So a new Doctor can only be an improvement in my opinion. 

Marvholly, are you Jewish then?  Sorry, I'm nosy.  And I don't really know much about Hanukkah, when all is said and done.  Other than it's early this year and hitting this week.  

[Wisconsin Beth]

God I'm tired today.  And it's dark and gloomy here.  Bah humbu-no, I don't mean that.  I'm enjoying Christmas so far this year.  The kids have Advent calenders going, the tree is up (hopefully lights will go on tonight) and I got a great start on Christmas shopping.  I could be done with the kids but I think Tinker Toys are coming into my house this Christmas. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

We did get the tree decorated - only broke 2 ornaments in the process - 1 was DH, 1 was kids.  Well, ok, we broke more than that if you count the Star Wars figures being played with and broken but I'm gluing them back together.  So they don't count in my world.   

Got a crock pot meal for tonight.  I'm off tomorrow.  The afternoon is for DD's craft day at school.  I'm debating what to do in the morning, once I get the kids places.  I could finish up Christmas shopping.  I could wrap what I've currently got.  I could go to the gym and work out.  I could bake cookies and/or get the dough ready for baking with the kids this weekend.  I could clean, nah.  Not gonna happen.  But the possibilities are endless right now! 

[taz157]

You could also do absolutely NOTHING too!

[Wisconsin Beth]

I know.  That occurred to me too.    I suspect I'm going to prep cookie dough.  But I'll let you know what I decide to do. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Baking won out, plus harassing on the couch for a bit.  Oh and the eternal laundry...

[kilroy]

Harassing what/who, Beth?   Relaxing, maybe?

[Wisconsin Beth]

It was supposed to be "fat-assing" Stupid autocorrect! 

[taz157]

But at least you got to bake in peace.

[Wisconsin Beth]

I left the last batch of cookies out to cool and went to K's thing at school.  We came back and I had a massive headache so we laid on the couch and set up the kindle and tv to watch the mini-minions shorts (over and over and over...) and K kept getting off the couch.  Eventaully it dawned on me that she was getting up to get a cookie, coming back, snuggling, eating the cookie and then heading back for another cookie.    I have no idea how many she ate.  I don't really care either, to be honest.  Eating as many cookies as you can while Mom is distracted is a right of passage as far as I'm concerned. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

I had the strangest dream last night.  I dreamt that DH and I were coming home from being out.  And as we got closer to the door, we could hear Cabe sobbing his heart out behind the door - he'd been sleeping when we left and we forgot him!  And then Keira came scampering up the stairs (it was an apt. I think) and we'd left her behind too, except while Cabe was locked in, she was locked out.  I'm so glad it was only a dream. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Had a fight with DH last night.  We made up but for us it was bad. 

And I'm feeling restless and discontented with my life.  In the past when I got this way, I'd move or try on a different aspect personality (if that makes sense) but those aren't exactly options now. 

[taz157]

(((((hugs)))))

[Wisconsin Beth]

Thanks Taz.

I just, I don't know, want something different right now.  Hell, just the kids not tossing blankets on the grubby living room floor 2365000000 times a day would help. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

OMG, I got to clean out the closet in the small bathroom yesterday, with both kids home, in relative peace and quiet.  K was playing with her Sofia Castle and didn't want C to play with her so I built him a tent w/ blankets, a laundry basket and the kid table.  Then K wanted a tent so I built her one and made C's a bit bigger.  They played in relative peace and harmony for over an hour. 

Most of the indoor Christmas stuff is down and put away.  We've got 3 things outdoors and I'm tossing 2 of them due to age and disrepair.  But I need to trudge though the snow to get them.  Maybe this weekend. 

Had a pretty decent weekend, all in all.  I stayed home with the kids yesterday, did some work from home on Sunday which was hell between the kids and the slow connection.  Spent some quality time with DH.  We didn't talk about anything super serious but it was good all in all. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

I got a lot down this weekend.  DH went to work on Sat. and seemed to do nothing the rest of the weekend.  I'm sure that's wrong, but it's how it felt to me.  So I got my "revenge" by tossing out the pan he loved but accidentally burnt some non-dairy/non-soy cheese on.  We'd talked, the pan was toast, he got a replacement for Christmas anyway.  But I thought it was already gone.  Nope, in a cupboard in the kitchen.  So petty of me.  But it felt good. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

My younger sister said something to me at the family Christmas party.  And it's been ricocheting all over my life since then.  She managed to hold up a mirror and let me see myself as her kids do.  And I KNOW it wasn't planned or meant to do that.  So I'm working on figuring out how to change my reactions and stuff. 

And this morning as I was driving into work, I turned the corner and OMG there was this fabulous sunrise in front of me.  It made me so very happy. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

God, my thighs hurt.  I spent 35 minutes on a stationary bike last night.  My bone spurs hurt but aren't killing me.  They left that for my thighs. 

I think I'm going to try to focus on cleaning this weekend.  I toyed with taking the kids to the Zoo but they're talking highs of 20 this weekend.  Brrrrrrrr. 

I"m kinda jealous of my older sister right now.  She's in San Diego with her husband, on vacation.  I wish I was somewhere warm. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

I did end up taking the kids to the Zoo on Sunday.  It wasn't so cold, probably because we were walking.  It's not going to rank as one of our better zoo trips.  I think I looked a lot like I felt because a trio of zookeepers asked me about our trip around 4pm. 

Monday we organized the kid rooms, my sister, her younger daughter (18ish), DD and me.  Spent a lot on cubes and bins but the kid rooms look great.  The kids really like their cubes. 

I rearranged our room too.  Not sure if I like it or not.  DH isn't sure either.  But we're going to leave it for now. 

Cabe's been sleeping like crap, DH was a snot last night and I'm tired and cranky today.  I don't think I'm going to make a full day at work.  And I have to stop at the post office to get a rebate mailed.  We're VERYCLOSE to the deadline and it's for $275 so yeah, I want it.  IT's mostly my fault for not taking care of it earlier too.  So I'm thinking I'll go to the post office on my way home and make bread and meatloaf for dinner and then take a nice long nap.  Probably won't work out that way but I think I'm willing to give it a shot.

[Wisconsin Beth]

I did get to the post office on the 22nd, made meatloaf and took a nice long nap.  Didn't get to bread as my yeast expired 5/2013.  I bought new yeast this weekend.  Still didn't make bread though. 

DH is talking fairly seriously about remodeling the kitchen.  I'm afraid to get my hopes up.  Esp. since we looked at money and there's about $3K in our checking account and lots of bills to be paid from it.  Admittedly, there's almost $6K in the VAC/copay account and $8K in the money market account.  And we both get paid on the 31st. 

So I'm going to get a list going on what MUST happen for the kitchen, in my opinion.
1. We need an electrician.  We've got dead ceiling lights, a weird lightplate and power to the laundry seems to be daisy-chained to the kitchen.  And more outlets would be good. 
2. Insulation on the outer walls.
3. New fridge and new stove.  And figure out what we want to do about the currently non working garbage disposal - new one or none.
    The current fridge, even on the lowest setting, is freezing stuff in the fridge.  And there's a continual ice buildup on the bottom of the freezer (it's a side by side model)
    The current electric oven is a built-in and we want to put the fridge where it currently is.
    The current stovetop is gas.  1 burner is dead and 1 needs to be manually lit about every 3rd use.  In order to put a "regular" stove in where the gas line is, we'd have to remove cabinets. 
4. Check the floor and subflooring under the sink and by the fridge. 

Things I WANT to have happen in the kitchen
1. Soffets come down.
2. Passway/window/breakfast bar into living room. 
    We'd need to cut a hole in the wall. 
    I know there's power on that wall.  And it's probably load bearing. 
    And the turned off water for the ice maker feeds up from the basement on that wall.
3. New cabinets.  Our suck.  Including new broom closet.
4. New flooring.  We have carpet.  Enough said.
5. New sink.
6. New countertop.  I want Corian.  

So, I'm guessing $1K for the electrical work and $2K-$3K for appliances.  Insulation = ?

[Wisconsin Beth]

I did talk with DH about the kitchen and my not wanting to get my hopes up.  We had a nice talk but didn't come to any conclusions.  I think I'm going to copy and paste my last post into an email for him.  I need to print off my tax stuff from work so we can do our taxes.  I'm fairly sure we're going to get at least $1K in tax returns.  Possibly more. 

I did sign Cabe up for K4 at Keira's school this fall. 

My Dad's heart is having a-fib issues.  He was put on albuteral last week.  Had an EKG yesterday and goes for an echo-cardiogram soon.  I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that I'm going to lose my dad eventually.  I just am not ready for it to be anytime soon. 

[taz157]

Feb 4, 2014 11:01:27 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

My Dad's heart is having a-fib issues.  He was put on albuteral last week.  Had an EKG yesterday and goes for an echo-cardiogram soon.  I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that I'm going to lose my dad eventually.  I just am not ready for it to be anytime soon. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

And I got to have a lovely chat with Keira about DN#6 last night.  Joy.  Keira's been asking MIL about her.  MIL doesn't want to deal with the topic so she told DH, who told me.  And since we're going to MIL's on Sat. night and it's likely that DN#6 won't be there, we need to tell her something.  So I did.  I told Keira that DN#6 has issues/problems figuring out if she needs to follow rules or not; that she's trying to figure out how to be a teenager (she'll be 14 in March) and that her parents don't feel they can keep her safe right now.  So DN#6 is living in a group home while she figures some of this stuff out.  Keira has questions, which I tried to answer in a way that made sense to her and didn't scare her.  And I told her that it hurts Auntie L and Uncle K to talk about it right now, so we have to be careful in how we ask about it.  I'm pretty sure she didn't get that and is either going to blurt out her questions or is going to keep her mouth completely shut about D on Sat. night.  And we talked about how as parents, we want to love and keep our kids safe, even when it's hard. 

I did talk with L this week.  Apparently BIL is talking about filing for termination of parental rights.  L told him to file for divorce at the same time.  She's not giving up on DN#6.  Who was put in group home on the condition that she not run away.  Well, she did run from there.  They were waiting to hear back from the social worker and/or the judge on what happens next.  Supposedly DN#6 is going into detention (which I think is Juvie Hall for old farts like me) and then secured residential treatment. 

On the home front:

I stayed home on Wed. and Thurs.  Watched The Mummy on Wed. and The Mummy Returns on Thurs.  And I still don't get how the relationship between Evie and Rick and Alex went so far south in the 8-10 years between The Mummy Returns and the one with the Chinese Mummy.  I think I read/saw that the stuff that explained that got edited out.  DH wants to watch the latest Riddick movie again this weekend.  I told him I want to see Pitch Black again before we do. 

I've also been horrible with taking my anti-depression pills the last week.  I keep leaving them at work and then not being at work.  Now they're back in my purse where they belong.  But I think I've had them twice in the last 8 days.  Which may have been part of the dizziness yesterday.  I don't know.  I do know that I'm tired of being sick and tired of being cold and tired of winter. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

And thanks Taz. 

[mizbear]

Beth- Hugs. I have been there with hospitalized cousin thing...
HTH

I was 14 when I finally got my father locked up for child abuse, at 15 I was in the hospital for what should have been a fatal suicide attempt.
With the exception of my cousin JL and my brother (who are 18 mos and 2 yrs younger than me respectively), all of the other grandchildren were turning 8 on down to 1 that year. The worst part was that my not quite 7 yr old cousin was there that day. And my Uncle M and his family had.just.left with 3 kids. J, the 8 yo didn't have many questions, and A and MD were too little to really ask any. A just knew that I wasn't there to play with. But K, E, and MB (who had witnessed part od what went on).had questions.
The adults didn't give some of the.kids honest answers for their ages and when I saw them all foe the first.time afterward things were very awkward. MB had not given up on me and it kept me going. He and I are still close.
L is right to not give up on her. And you are right to answers K's questions. It was a pretty awkwars thing to have some of my little cousins asking me questions because the adults didn't or couldn't deal with it. K knows there is something up. Answer her questions as best as tou can, encourage her to keep the dialogue open, and assure her that there is nothing wrong with her asking questions. For now, just encourage her to keep her questions around others limited to how is N6.

[Wisconsin Beth]

where'd my post go?

[Wisconsin Beth]

Thanks Mizbear.  It's helpful to have feedback from others in lousy childhood situations.  (And I'm glad your dad is dead.  I hope he's rotting in hell for abusing you.)

I don't want to lie to the kids about important stuff - I believe that if we talk truthfully (but at an age level) with them now, we have a chance of having better communication in the teenage years, when we'll need it.  I'm not counting Santa, the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny as important lies though.   

DN#6 was at the party on Sat. night.  DH stayed home to nurse his bug.  Keira did ask DN#6 something and it was completely NOT what I'd been trying to explain.  So I guess I fail at explanations.  I did tell DN#6 that K had misunderstood what I'd been trying to tell her. 

She was out on a pass with her parents, they dropped her off and she ran away Sat. night.  She'd insisted on having her piece of cake wrapped up to go (I asked for mine too, so it's not too weird) and in retrospect, I think she wanted to share it with someone.  I'm not sure if she's back or not.  I've been pretty much incommunicado the last few days but even DH isn't getting updates from MIL and he sees her daily when he drops off K.  But L admitted that MIL often gets things mixed up regarding DN#6. 

*-*-*-*
Today is DH and my 13th "first date" anniversary.  And 10th anniversary of the day he proposed.    We're trying to go out for dinner this weekend but the schedule is not looking pretty.  Cabe's dcp is doing a "date night" next weekend so we're definitely going out then.  They're happy to have Keira too.  We've had a couple of talks about gifts, I told him I want flowers, he asked if I minded getting them on Friday or Sat.  Such a sweetie when he wants to be.  Poor guy has been horny as all getout the last couple of weeks and between me being sick, him being sick and the kids not going to bed, it's jut not happening.  Hopefully this weekend the stars will line up for us. 

[mizbear]

Beth- Have a "home" date when you take the kids...

I think you can figure out the rest!

HUGS regarding niece.

There seems to be an overwhelming agreement on my father's post-mortem activities-

However,

$h!t stinks when it burns

Try to feel better, have a good day and I will keep DN6 in my thoughts

And K too- she is going to be that kid who stands up for someone else when they need it most

[Wisconsin Beth]

My younger sister's taking the kids on Sat. night.  We've got a thing at a dojo where a classmate/friend of Keira's goes.  It's 4-8pm on Sat. night.  My younger sister lives kinda near the dojo and DH really wants to go out to eat this weekend.  Since one of the places we like to go to is also in that area, I emailed my sister yesterday to ask if she'd take the kids from 0830-1030 so we could go out to eat.  As a joke, I tossed in something about overnight in parentheses and she's keeping them overnight.  And if I leave the booster seats, she'll return the kids to us on Sunday.  I'm delirious and excited.  And unexpected kid free night!  I'm thinking I need to buy her some flowers or chocolates or something as a thank you.  Like the biggest box of chocolate Godiva sells....