I really need to learn to shut up!

[Deleted]

He as a Bachelors in Public Administration and was going for his masters but dropped out after the first semester.

He hasn't work in 4-5 years so not sure if his bachelors hold any weight. My wife cousin got him a government job paying 35k earlier this year but he felt that was beneath him.

Dec 19, 2012 13:52:42 GMT -5 @bunnysmom said:

"she is a social worker so I am guessing make between 50-75k."

This is crazy! $300-400k+ mortgage, range rover, fiat, living in NY all on 50-75k??? I live in a MCOL (I think it is considered MCOL), make $90K+ and I do not see how I could ever afford a $400k house!!!! What made her think that she could EVER afford this? .

They give 100k Down so I am guessing the mortgage is closer to 320k.

Also her mom co-signed so I am guessing combined income was a least 100k or more.

So would fit within the 3X income YM suggest... I just find it funny that her mother own bank rejected them for it and they went ahead anyway.

Since PMI comes to about $4,200/month I wonder what type of interest rate they got? Don't remember what interest was like back in 2010.

[swamp]

He hasn't work in 4-5 years so not sure if his bachelors hold any weight. My wife cousin got in a government job paying 35k earlier this year but he felt that was below him.

But sitting around doing nothing and being supported by his wife and MIL isn't below him? He's a dick.

[swamp]

Dec 19, 2012 14:15:29 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Public ally embarrassing the spouse on FB is not cool.

I don't see how it embarasses her. It should be embarassing to him. He's the one being all googly eyed.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Has he ever said he is holding out for a managerial position? And is his name Eddie?

[Deleted]

Dec 19, 2012 14:20:37 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Has he ever said he is holding out for a managerial position? And is his name Eddie?

His words when he was asked: I am waiting for my dream job. I don't want to just take anything and when my dream job comes around be stuck.

That is a guy that had a wife and kid to feed. Since he worse on my wife cousin campaign I guess he was expecting a sweet deal: manager position making big bucks.

As I reminded him: the guy was a new legislator, what kids strings you think he could pull? Be happy with the 35k one and work your way up.

His excuse: after taxes, day care, student loans (because he would need to start paying them back since he would be working) he would barely clearing) $1,000/month and that wouldn't make it worth it.

[Deleted]

Yes 100k x 3 maybe approved but NY has huge taxes I believe! If they put 100k down, they wouldnt have PMI but they would still have the taxes which is almost 1k/ month by itself. Together making 100k is still not enough to think you can afford it IMO. They have 3 leased cars and expensive cars at that! I would tell your wife they are idiots but she may not want to hear that either

[Deleted]

"His excuse: after taxes, day care, student loans (because he would need to start paying them back since he would be working) he would barely clearing) $1,000/month and that wouldn't make it worth it. "

1000 extra would definitely make it worth it! If his dream job comes along, he can quit the interim job. And nobody will hire this guy for his dream job when he hasnt worked in years unless his dream job is being a jigolo.

[zibazinski]

So what does the new girl get? A cheating no working loser but any man is better than no man at all.

[swamp]

Dec 19, 2012 14:25:32 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

Dec 19, 2012 14:20:37 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Has he ever said he is holding out for a managerial position? And is his name Eddie?

His words when he was asked: I am waiting for my dream job. I don't want to just take anything and when my dream job comes around be stuck.

That is a guy that had a wife and kid to feed. Since he worse on my wife cousin campaign I guess he was expecting a sweet deal: manager position making big bucks.

As I reminded him: the guy was a new legislator, what kids strings you think he could pull? Be happy with the 35k one and work your way up.

His excuse: after taxes, day care, student loans (because he would need to start paying them back since he would be working) he would barely clearing) $1,000/month and that wouldn't make it worth it.

Um, yeah, because a $1000/mo < $0/mo. Oh wait.....

[Deleted]

And even if he doesn't clear any money, it is still worth it because with raises he will eventually outearn the expenses and he will be employed all these years. The daycare situation does not last forever.

[Deleted]

Dec 19, 2012 14:29:44 GMT -5 @bunnysmom said:

And even if he doesn't clear any money, it is still worth it because with raises he will eventually outearn the expenses and he will be employed all these years. The daycare situation does not last forever.

Look you are being logical, this is not a family unit that is known for being logical.

-> Would you buy a house on your own you couldn't afford?

-> used up all your inheritance to buy a car and a house?

-> Demanding that your MIL moves out when you know damn well you cannot where you live without her help?

-> Get 7k back during tax times and 3 months later needing to borrow money to make your mortgage and all your cc are maxed out.

[Deleted]

Dec 19, 2012 14:28:30 GMT -5 swamp said:

Dec 19, 2012 14:25:32 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

His words when he was asked: I am waiting for my dream job. I don't want to just take anything and when my dream job comes around be stuck.

That is a guy that had a wife and kid to feed. Since he worse on my wife cousin campaign I guess he was expecting a sweet deal: manager position making big bucks.

As I reminded him: the guy was a new legislator, what kids strings you think he could pull? Be happy with the 35k one and work your way up.

His excuse: after taxes, day care, student loans (because he would need to start paying them back since he would be working) he would barely clearing) $1,000/month and that wouldn't make it worth it.

Um, yeah, because a $1000/mo < $0/mo. Oh wait.....

Tell me about it!

[Deleted]

"this is not a family unit that is known for being logical. "

No $hit!

[Chocolate Lover]

Dec 19, 2012 15:00:59 GMT -5 @bunnysmom said:

"this is not a family unit that is known for being logical. "

No $hit!

We wouldn't get any entertainment out of them were they to suddenly get smart and use logic ;D

[Deleted]

At least I get some cute texts out of it:

"I LOVE You"

"You are amazing"

" I don't say it enough and certainly don't show it, but I appreciate all the things that you have done for our family"

[kindthatjingles]

According to my Ex husband, even during the marriage is ok

[swamp]

Dec 19, 2012 16:05:28 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

At least I get some cute texts out of it:

"I LOVE You"

"You are amazing"

" I don't say it enough and certainly don't show it, but I appreciate all the things that you have done for our family"

who cares about the texts. do you get a blow job out of it?

[redkitty]

Dec 19, 2012 16:08:29 GMT -5 swamp said:

Dec 19, 2012 16:05:28 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

At least I get some cute texts out of it:

"I LOVE You"

"You are amazing"

" I don't say it enough and certainly don't show it, but I appreciate all the things that you have done for our family"

who cares about the texts. do you get a blow job out of it?

LMAO I spit water all over my desk!!!! No nicer way to say thank you!

[Wisconsin Beth]

Dec 19, 2012 16:08:29 GMT -5 swamp said:

Dec 19, 2012 16:05:28 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

At least I get some cute texts out of it:

"I LOVE You"

"You are amazing"

" I don't say it enough and certainly don't show it, but I appreciate all the things that you have done for our family"

who cares about the texts. do you get a blow job out of it?

Um, shouldn't Carl be the one putting out and not receiving? As she's the peeved one?

[Deleted]

Dec 19, 2012 14:25:32 GMT -5 @bunnysmom said:

Yes 100k x 3 maybe approved but NY has huge taxes I believe! If they put 100k down, they wouldnt have PMI but they would still have the taxes which is almost 1k/ month by itself. Together making 100k is still not enough to think you can afford it IMO. They have 3 leased cars and expensive cars at that! I would tell your wife they are idiots but she may not want to hear that either

Seriously I would pay and I mean pay money to see their financial worksheets and budgets.

She has 6 figured student loans just like my wife; haven't made any payments for awhile.

Her mom works at a bank and I am guessing makes about 50k also; she is not a bank manager but I am guessing a step above a teller. Those people that have office on the side that you can talk to about opening accounts etc.

Leasing a fiat and Mercedes (assuming they own the Range Rover by now).

Their PMI is $4,2000/month and if that is still correct we are talking $50,400/year so basically her whole income (either mother or daughter)

That is not counting utilities/ groceries/ car note/ car insurance etc.

I really want a peak behind the curtain and see how they juggle it.

[Deleted]

Dec 19, 2012 16:08:29 GMT -5 swamp said:

Dec 19, 2012 16:05:28 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

At least I get some cute texts out of it:

"I LOVE You"

"You are amazing"

" I don't say it enough and certainly don't show it, but I appreciate all the things that you have done for our family"

who cares about the texts. do you get a blow job out of it?

I'll have to report back tomorrow

[weltschmerz]

Dec 19, 2012 8:11:44 GMT -5 TheHaitian said:

Dec 19, 2012 8:08:20 GMT -5 busymom said:

In my circle of friends, it's not acceptable for a man to be seen in public with another woman until the divorce is final. Otherwise, it's assumed that the new girlfriend "broke up" the marriage.

Even if it is months after he moved out and they were separated?

It has been 3 months or going on 3 months for them and they don't seem to be making any progress towards reconciliation. So I would assume that is a safe window to start "dating"

I was separated from my husband for NINE YEARS before I started divorce proceedings. Not because I was hoping for a reconciliation, but because divorces cost money, and I was a struggling single parent.

[weltschmerz]

Dec 19, 2012 11:00:35 GMT -5 swamp said:

Dec 19, 2012 10:52:12 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I don't however think you did anything wrong by saying the guy has good taste in women

I don't either but you'd think he'd know by now that Mrs C is going to twist whatever he says.

The correct answer is "You are right honey, he is a jerk and that woman he is dating is fugly compared to your cousin!"

DH has commented to me on other women being hot. He's a human male, he appreciates good looking women. It doesn't mean he loves me any less, it just means he likes to look. I like to look too.

Just because you own a painting doesn't mean you have to stop going to the museum.

[Sum Dum Gai]

Dude, don't listen to all the women here. "Just smile and nod." "Nobody wants to hear your opinion anyway." What a bunch of crap! If the little woman is going to ask for your opinion on something you should give it to her and if she has a problem with it she can damn well keep it to herself or feel the back of your hand. Like god intended.

[Phoenix84]

People can date whenever they want. So if someone is separated from their spouse, they can date immediately as far as I"m concerned.

"I still cannot get over that a guy with no job, a kid, still legally married and living at his parents is getting tail. I guess there is always hope for us guys!"

You've hit upon one of the great mysteries of women and the uniervise. I've spent a lot of time trying to figure out the same thing.

I have a cousin who's similar. He has bi polar, has a kid, divorced, can't hold a job for more than a few months, high school dropout, yet he's ALWAYS living with a girlfriend.

Why is it that total losers get women coming out of the woodwork to be with them while nice, gainfully employed guys like me can't even get a second date 99% of the time.

Your guess is as good as mine. My best theory is that many women like the excitment of a guy not having his shit together. I think many women, especially young women, prefer "projects" over partners.

[Phoenix84]

Well, I'm single, but I'm still of the mind if someone asks for your opinion you should give it. I'm not a big fan of telling people what they want to hear.

[weltschmerz]

I have a cousin who's similar. He has bi polar, has a kid, divorced, can't hold a job for more than a few months, high school dropout, yet he's ALWAYS living with a girlfriend.
---------------
Yeah, but what KIND of girlfriend? Is it someone you would feel proud to share your life with?

[Sum Dum Gai]

Yeah, but what KIND of girlfriend? Is it someone you would feel proud to share your life with?

When you're a bipolar, divorced, absentee father, high school drop out, that can barely hold down a shitty job, what criteria do you use to determine whether you're proud to be with somebody? I'm thinking female and has a pulse just about covers it. Maybe add not fat to the list.

[weltschmerz]

Dec 19, 2012 17:48:30 GMT -5 Sum Dum Gai said:

Yeah, but what KIND of girlfriend? Is it someone you would feel proud to share your life with?

When you're a bipolar, divorced, absentee father, high school drop out, that can barely hold down a shitty job, what criteria do you use to determine whether you're proud to be with somebody? I'm thinking female and has a pulse just about covers it. Maybe add not fat to the list.

That's what I meant. "Everyone" is capable of having a boyfrind/girlfriend if their standards are really low.

[muttleynfelix]

Dec 19, 2012 17:51:19 GMT -5 weltschmerz said:

Dec 19, 2012 17:48:30 GMT -5 Sum Dum Gai said:

When you're a bipolar, divorced, absentee father, high school drop out, that can barely hold down a shitty job, what criteria do you use to determine whether you're proud to be with somebody? I'm thinking female and has a pulse just about covers it. Maybe add not fat to the list.

That's what I meant. "Everyone" is capable of having a boyfrind/girlfriend if their standards are really low.