CarolinaKat
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 16:10:37 GMT -5
Posts: 6,364
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Post by CarolinaKat on Jul 11, 2011 9:37:20 GMT -5
[quote author=craftysarah board=finance thread=10955 post=449226 time=1310392769[Not to be snarky, but I really think couples today overthink the importance of their nuptials in other people's lives. Has anyone here truly been offended because they weren't invited to their second cousins wedding?
Amen to that.[/quote]
This happened in my family, but it was 1st cousins who were not invited. The MOB's Brother and wife(my mom's sister) were invited but not her two adult children, who grew up with the bride (she got married in her late 30s). It turns out there were invitations purchased and addressed for not only the 2 cousins, but the aunt's two sisters (my mom and her other sister). The MOB took several of the sealed invitations out of the packet (not only these) when she went to mail to 'cut down the guest list b/c daughter shouldn't have to invite those people'. The bride found out one week before the wedding and was absouletly miserable. She found out when she called all of us and to say how sorry she was that we wouldn't be able to make it, and found out no invitations had been issued.
The MOB then asked to use her mother's silver for the bridal party at the reception, which had been gifted to the 2 cousins who were not invited.
It's caused a lot of bad feelings, especially between MOB and the bride (rocky relationship to start with). FWIW bride is still on good terms with everone who was slighted, and she still sees/calls regularly. MOB is not.
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michelyn8
Familiar Member
Joined: Jul 25, 2012 6:48:24 GMT -5
Posts: 926 
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Post by michelyn8 on Jul 11, 2011 9:58:16 GMT -5
Pardon?  FB and her DF are not related, but they have some mutual cousins. It's how they met. Anyway, what I am saying there, is that there are people who are related to both sides of the family who might be able to help her navigate this. later, if that throw you, then how about this: My kids can say their uncle married their cousin. They love the look they get when they tell people that. Ex's youngest half brother via his Mom married one of his cousins on his Dad's side. When the girls bring it up, I remind them its their family and its not mine anymore............LOL As for the original post: I find it very presumptuous the cousin would send the additional addresses without some kind of explanation. I wouldn't worry about it. Stick to your original guest list and if his family gets upset, oh well. I assume its hard enough to come up with a guest list that doesn't leave out someone who may get a little bent out of shape by not being invited. You don't need to worry about offending a bunch of folks you never even met. |
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Firebird
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 29, 2010 12:55:06 GMT -5
Posts: 12,448
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Post by Firebird on Jul 11, 2011 10:14:38 GMT -5
My kids can say their uncle married their cousin.
Yeah, my cousins on my dad's side can say that their cousin is marrying their cousin ;D Although actually, that makes it a bit easier for people to understand what happened - most people can picture a cousin from Dad's side and a cousin from Mom's side falling in love, which would mean they're not related to each other. Which is more or less what happened.
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thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,434
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Post by thyme4change on Jul 11, 2011 10:27:35 GMT -5
What relationship would a bride have with a young girl where she would think it was appropriate to invite her to be a flower girl and NOT have the parents attend the wedding?
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thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,434
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Post by thyme4change on Jul 11, 2011 10:28:57 GMT -5
LOL - my neighbors are related in some way - but not by blood. They met at a family wedding. I am not mentally strong enough to NOT give her crap about it on a regular basis.
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