Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Jun 16, 2011 11:47:00 GMT -5
Oh yeah, one more thing - I am quickly discovering something about myself that I don't like. I am not nearly as disciplined as I thought I was (in general, but especially about money). As Lena always says, it's a lot easier to manage your money when you have *a lot* of it. I've always made a good salary, and I've always kept my committed expenses low.
A very good start, but it's caused an interesting side-effect in my thinking that is being brought to bear these days - I've always had enough money. With the exception of a brief time when I was twenty and my life was truly messed up, and 2009 when I was in college (and even then, I had enough to pay the bills), I have always had a considerable surplus of income. So I have never *really* had to be as consistent and careful about my savings plan as I would have had to be if I had experienced leaner times.
That holds true today. I am quite used to spending an extra $1,000 here and there without really thinking too much about it, because I have almost always had an extra $1,000 to throw around in any given month and if I didn't spend it on whatever I was spending it on, it would just go into savings.
So there's been a lot of money being - frankly - pissed away over the past year or so. It's never mattered. I was still meeting my goals.
Developing financial discipline - and realizing that I needed to - has been surprisingly difficult. I always thought I was pretty disciplined financially. But no. Looking back, I realize there are a lot of goals I set for myself in the past that I didn't *quite* meet, and it just never mattered to me, because I always had enough that I had the privilege of not caring. So what if I saved $8,000 instead of $10,000 this year? At least I was saving, right? This has been my thought process.
So anyway, that's been interesting.
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8 Bit WWBG
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Your Money admin
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 8:57:29 GMT -5
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Jun 16, 2011 11:51:07 GMT -5
Very good and insightful advice that people can take the pieces they need from. I hadn't considered how complicated it would be to begin a merge process during an especially chaotic time in one's lives, but reading what you wrote it indeed makes perfect sense. Trying to move things when you have large one off expenses, as well as several surprises pop up (which would have popped up anyway, I guess) sounds tough.
Thank you for sharing.
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Jun 16, 2011 11:51:53 GMT -5
I am glad things are working out and that you are feeling better about the money issue. That's one piece of stress you don't really need (or at least not to the extent you were experiencing it). I remember the days of DH having to ask me, as we walked in to a store, if we could afford something, and me having to say no, or not this week/month, whatever, since I managed and still manage the check book. Now, while we are living on a single income, we each have an allowance we can spend freely, and, when an unexpected expense comes up, he doesn't have to think about paying it, he just has to remember to tell me he did.
For now, I would suggest that you and DF set up a weekly date to talk about finances. Later, you can probably get to a once a month or as needed (which is where we are) talk, but with everything you've got going on, a weekly touch base will probably help you both feel a lot less stress.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Jun 16, 2011 12:04:07 GMT -5
Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for asking. Looking back on it, I'm glad this all happened the way it did. School of life can charge expensive tuition sometimes. But it's highlighted some lazy habits of mine that I'd do well to fix now, while it's still relatively easy.
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Firebird
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Joined: Dec 29, 2010 12:55:06 GMT -5
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Post by Firebird on Jun 16, 2011 12:04:54 GMT -5
For now, I would suggest that you and DF set up a weekly date to talk about finances. Later, you can probably get to a once a month or as needed (which is where we are) talk, but with everything you've got going on, a weekly touch base will probably help you both feel a lot less stress.
Yes, I agree. I will try to start doing this with him.
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CarolinaKat
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Post by CarolinaKat on Jun 16, 2011 12:47:26 GMT -5
Midwesternjd, I'd be happy to send you some of her now, if you like ;D She is adorable. I wanna see alien kitty
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Firebird
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Joined: Dec 29, 2010 12:55:06 GMT -5
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Post by Firebird on Jun 16, 2011 12:52:59 GMT -5
PM me your email address and I'll send them right over ;D
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Deleted
Joined: Oct 5, 2024 9:32:12 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Jun 16, 2011 15:54:07 GMT -5
me three! I require alien kitty pics.
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Firebird
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Joined: Dec 29, 2010 12:55:06 GMT -5
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Post by Firebird on Jun 16, 2011 16:49:31 GMT -5
Gin, I can't find your email address I must have it somewhere but I don't know where. PM? midwesternjd, you've got mail ;D
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