Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 28, 2020 22:45:36 GMT -5
I immediately thought of everyone here when I saw this... Lol--omg. I might really resemble that! 🤣 I know I do!
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jul 29, 2020 8:14:23 GMT -5
That's been me on every decision since the pandemic. Lol.
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oped
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Post by oped on Jul 29, 2020 9:53:00 GMT -5
I talked to RIT. I asked.. what if our state moves to high risk between now and classes? Given that she can't move all her stuff into a hotel room, if I bring her stuff to her after two weeks, am I not just another vector? Must I just let her empty the car herself and not hug her or it ruins quarantine? Could she get her test and then quarantine in our house and we all just drive straight to campus on move in day? One of her roomates plans to isolate in their apartment the first two weeks during which classes start, does that mean essentially they all have to isolate there then?
I don't know was the answer. Sigh. It seems like lots of solid planning, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty of the details, I'm not sure how its actually going to function.
He 'put in a ticket'... we shall see how it goes.
Also for the first time the weekly update from Drexel was less optimistic. Son had already decided he's staying home, discussed it with his advisor and his favorite in department professor. He says its a shit show and figures everyone will be home before long anyway.
This was the gist:
"I know that many of you are concerned with how the pandemic's recent trajectory will impact our plans for September, even questioning whether our hybrid approach of remote and face-to-face teaching, student engagement and research still makes sense. Please know that I hear your concerns.
From the beginning, the University has set as its highest priority the community's safety and well-being. We also believe that our ability to pivot and adapt during the pandemic will be essential for operating safely and continuing to fulfill our mission of teaching, research and service. Drexel's planning efforts have been designed with agility and rapid response in mind, should current conditions change. I believe our flexibility will enable us to move ahead successfully, no matter which direction COVID-19 takes. "
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Jul 29, 2020 9:56:21 GMT -5
I’m doing some research but also figured I’d ask here. Anyone know anything about Roblox? Okay for an 8yo boy (heading into 3rd grade) to play? C asked about getting it - a kid at daycare with him this summer has it and let’s C play/watch him play some times when they can use devices during the younger kiddos’ nap time. I will also add that we are not gamers unless it’s a board game or card game. We don’t have any gaming systems, and while we have an iPad that he can occasionally use, it doesn’t have games on it other than some learning games, PBS Kids app, etc. DD plays it, she's 12. She plays online with her cousins and their friends all the time. It's like any other social media/onlne game. The game itself is harmless, keep the account on private and make sure he's only playing with his friends.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jul 29, 2020 9:58:43 GMT -5
Both Abby and Gwen play Roloblox. It's pretty safe it's one of the few online games that were approved to be on their school Chromebooks. Abby has the chat feature shut off. I've gone through Gwen's list and make sure that is is not on open chat when she plays. Target has a couple of books I bought Gwen that talk about various types of the most popular Obis that are being played right now. They were only $9 so if you want to get those it's a good place to start. I still don't get what the big deal is but then my parents didn't get the big deal about Super Mario so. ..
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jul 29, 2020 10:07:53 GMT -5
Dh took the kids hiking. Even though I'm working it is glorious to be in a quiet house.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jul 29, 2020 13:56:28 GMT -5
Dh took the kids hiking. Even though I'm working it is glorious to be in a quiet house. Enjoy the sound of silence!
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lurkyloo
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Post by lurkyloo on Jul 29, 2020 20:16:41 GMT -5
So, among the social justice books we’ve been reading was a picture book about Fannie Lou Hamer. On a recommended list, Caldecott medal, yada yada. It...pulled absolutely zero punches, which I am mostly cool with, but I glossed over the actual language they used in describing what was said during the jail cell beating. DS, however, is an excellent reader and pulled it out of the library books stack. And that’s how come I needed to have the “if I ever EVER hear that word out of your mouth again I will take away ALL your toys and give them away” conversation about the N-word with my kid
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2020 10:02:40 GMT -5
Carrot's charter school authorizer, our local school district, the FIRST authorizer in the state of MN was TERMINATED by the MN dept of education yesterday after 4 years of violations. This means the charters in town have to find a new organization to sponsor them or they have to close. The school director sent out an email last night that they have 4 prospects that were very interested in adding them and feel good about being able to make the June deadline, but this kind of blew me away. I was not aware that anyone but our local district could sponsor us, but apparently it can be any public or private school or even a religious or charitable organization or one of the colleges. Could make things interesting. I still haven't talked to the director about Carrot leaving. I've been part of that school for 15 years now so it feels like requesting a divorce...actually my relationship with the school director has lasted longer than both my marriages combined and he has spent more time with my kids than their dads! ![](https://i239.photobucket.com/albums/ff155/JiminiChristmas/ymamsmiles/rofl.gif) eta: Well, not 5 minutes after I wrote this the school called me. They got a request for records from the other school and wanted to find out what was up. So, now not only does it feel like a divorce, it feels like they found out from the court summons in the mail!
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jul 30, 2020 18:08:51 GMT -5
I got a call and email from different staff at the kids school asking if we're staying in the school this year. I filed the homeschool paperwork with the district 2 weeks ago, but apparently it hasn't made it to the school.
I felt really bad, which is silly. I'm sure E will be back next year, and I seriously doubt school will be in person for several months anyway. I feel like it looks like we're thumbing our nose at them when we aren't. We love them and hate to miss a year.
I also know I'm worrying far too much about this. It's barely a blip to anyone else and I need to let it go.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2020 18:18:17 GMT -5
I got a call and email from different staff at the kids school asking if we're staying in the school this year. I filed the homeschool paperwork with the district 2 weeks ago, but apparently it hasn't made it to the school. I felt really bad, which is silly. I'm sure E will be back next year, and I seriously doubt school will be in person for several months anyway. I feel like it looks like we're thumbing our nose at them when we aren't. We love them and hate to miss a year. I also know I'm worrying far too much about this. It's barely a blip to anyone else and I need to let it go. Worrying won't help, but believe me when I tell you that it's not barely a blip to anyone else! Just read the posts. If I still had kids at home, I'd be reduced to a blubbering hulk. Let them know that you appreciate them and hoping to be back next year. This has got to be a personal choice that each family makes depending on their circumstances and what they feel is best for their kids and themselves. You're doing what's right for your circumstances. Not to worry. None of us has a crystal ball.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 31, 2020 8:32:37 GMT -5
Carrot's teacher emailed me last night and I felt really bad. She was so sad and said she was going to miss him horribly, but said she supported my decision to do what I felt was right for him. Then I was of course thinking, "OMG, I MADE A MISTAKE!" Especially since, if I could flip a switch and have this covid shit go away there is no way I would move him from where he's at right now. Anyhow, she gave me her personal email address to give to Carrot so he can email her and talk about Fortnite or whatever is on his mind. Besides his two close friends she was the main thing he was concerned about leaving when we talked changing schools, so he was really happy to hear she gave him her contact info.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jul 31, 2020 12:58:40 GMT -5
Want to gripe about DH's family for a minute. I am getting so tired of his mom dogging on my family for anything and everything. First of all why are you even friends with my brother and second block it if it offends you so much. Then there are the comments about how we never should have opened a business from all sides of his family. WTF? It's not like we are drowning in debt we are actually doing quite well thank you and have made it through the first year when the majority of places fail so ::giant middle finger:: Then a couple years back when it was 110 and our A/C acted up his dad gave us a window unit. I should have known better by now but we were told it was a gift, no need to return it or pay them back we can keep it for whatever we need it for. Well we used it and then my parents' window unit crapped out so we let them use that one. Two years later MIL decides it was NOT a gift and makes constant comments about how we had no business loaning it, how dare my parents use it blah blah. Well it shorted this summer, why who knows. I offered to cut a $400 check to shut her up but DH said no that wouldn't solve the problem she'll just find something new. We aren't going to cower and apologize for using something that was given to us as a gift. If she had stipulations she should have made it clear upfront. Then there are the still regular comments about how *I* am to blame for our finances even though DH went off on her about it. Then his sister made a comment TO Gwen about why don't we put Charlotte down after Gwen said she had heartworms (we've had a talk with Gwen since then about oversharing with his family). Gwen has no reason to make anything like that up. WTF business is it of hers it's not like we are going to her asking for money. Why don't she put her elderly dog down and kill/eat the chickens they both cost WAY more than treating Charlotte does. Then there were all the comments about my house keeping skills while the bathroom was being redone. Then SIL keeps posting Trump crap on facebook which I can block and I do but then in the same breath she's ranting about people not wearing masks, treating COVID as a hoax, blah blah. Umm. . . ![](https://i239.photobucket.com/albums/ff155/JiminiChristmas/ymamsmiles/idunno.gif) The hypcroisy is wearing on me. His family has some pretty bad skeletons in their closet they shouldn't be throwing stones at me and mine. This whole social isolation thing ended up being a blessing in disguise. I am sure on some level DH knows I avoid his parents because his mom pisses me off but COVID makes a pretty darn handy and reasonable "excuse" not to have anything to do with them. After all I work outside the house, at two jobs no less, who knows how many cooties I am carrying. On a side related note DH and I were talking about being "woke" the other night and he mused as to why it's taken him almost 50 years for him to see what's going on in the world. Well for starters you are an upper middle class white straight male from a Christian background so it's not like you have ever had to face any of it yourself. Second have you seen your family? They are the epitome of Midwestern WASPs. Your whole family is living in a secure white privileged bubble without any interest whatsoever in stepping out of it. Look how your cousin reacted to her son coming out of the closet (I still don't get how that was a surprise to anyone). You are now out of that bubble and you got a wife that is willing to confront you over your shit. Yeah it would have been nice if it happened sooner but the fact is you are leaving your bubble and learning is what matters at the end of the day.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Jul 31, 2020 13:57:23 GMT -5
I got a call and email from different staff at the kids school asking if we're staying in the school this year. I filed the homeschool paperwork with the district 2 weeks ago, but apparently it hasn't made it to the school. I felt really bad, which is silly. I'm sure E will be back next year, and I seriously doubt school will be in person for several months anyway. I feel like it looks like we're thumbing our nose at them when we aren't. We love them and hate to miss a year. I also know I'm worrying far too much about this. It's barely a blip to anyone else and I need to let it go. Worrying won't help, but believe me when I tell you that it's not barely a blip to anyone else! Just read the posts. If I still had kids at home, I'd be reduced to a blubbering hulk.
Let them know that you appreciate them and hoping to be back next year. This has got to be a personal choice that each family makes depending on their circumstances and what they feel is best for their kids and themselves. You're doing what's right for your circumstances. Not to worry. None of us has a crystal ball. ![](https://i239.photobucket.com/albums/ff155/JiminiChristmas/ymamsmiles/yeahthat.gif) poof
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jul 31, 2020 14:04:49 GMT -5
NomoreDramaQ1015 I know it's hard but I'd just try and ignore your in-laws. From the way you've described them it doesn't sound as if they are picking on you in particular; they sound incredibly negative people in general. If that's the case then I think it's safe to say that it really isn't about you and ignore their diatribes. There will be nothing that you could do or say that will turn them into positive (or even basically polite) people.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 31, 2020 14:18:57 GMT -5
For whatever reason I decided to peek at ex-MIL's Facebook page today (Ex 2.0's mom). Good lord that woman is just as much a whack job as ever. Her page is filled with stuff that Facebook flagged as inaccurate and she's ranting up a storm over it. Several years back she decided her Facebook account was hacked and deleted it and started a new one. She's been sitting in my friend request inbox ever since. But, just wanted to mention that just reading some of her stuff raised my blood pressure and stressed me out. I know you can't just shut off your in-laws like that but I highly recommend doing it as much as you can!
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jul 31, 2020 14:22:54 GMT -5
Oh I do and COVID has given me a legitimate reason to shut them down even further. And goodness knows my family has more than it's share of drama but you know what at least we embrace our dysfunctional glory. We don't keep our faces in a jar beside the bed. You know what you're getting when you meet our crazy asses. ![](https://i239.photobucket.com/albums/ff155/JiminiChristmas/ymamsmiles/tongue2.png) That's what has annoyed me more about DH's family over the years. They measure your self worth/value in how much stuff a person has, which has taken me YEARS to beat out of DH (and he still sometimes falls into the habit) and they really put themselves on a pedestal. I got some stories that I would judge to be worse than a "stolen" air conditioner or my brother smoking pot. DH's demons alone could fill a novel. It's just with everything that happened last year between me and DH and then all of 2020 so far I am having a real hard time societal bull shit in all forms.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jul 31, 2020 19:53:54 GMT -5
I unfriended dh's parents on fb. Mil posted something that started with, "I was ok with you being gay until you had to shove it down my throat" and unfriending will create far less drama than any response I would have provided. (It's a stupid meme, nothing directed at us, but seriously if that was them being ok with gays, I'd hate to think what they would have done if they weren't.)
I see them at most quarterly. Last visit mil started to bring up blm protests and my response was... not classy so no ones really missing me.
Even sil who I adore, but everything has to be on their terms, and I'm done making that work. If plans work out for me, great, otherwise see ya next time.
It's the least conflicted I've ever felt about my in-laws. It's hard when dh wants to vent about them. I listen to what I can tolerate and walk away from that too.
Drama - I'd totally pay her back for the a.c. unit and disconnect. Tell dh that you don't want him sharing info with his family about your family. Id warn my parents and ask/suggest that they remove any connections they have to your inlaws. Keep them on a low info diet.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jul 31, 2020 19:57:17 GMT -5
I got a call and email from different staff at the kids school asking if we're staying in the school this year. I filed the homeschool paperwork with the district 2 weeks ago, but apparently it hasn't made it to the school. I felt really bad, which is silly. I'm sure E will be back next year, and I seriously doubt school will be in person for several months anyway. I feel like it looks like we're thumbing our nose at them when we aren't. We love them and hate to miss a year. I also know I'm worrying far too much about this. It's barely a blip to anyone else and I need to let it go. Worrying won't help, but believe me when I tell you that it's not barely a blip to anyone else! Just read the posts. If I still had kids at home, I'd be reduced to a blubbering hulk. Let them know that you appreciate them and hoping to be back next year. This has got to be a personal choice that each family makes depending on their circumstances and what they feel is best for their kids and themselves. You're doing what's right for your circumstances. Not to worry. None of us has a crystal ball. I didn't mean that covid was a blip. Just my inflated sense of ego, agonizing over what the school thinks of us for pulling the kids out. If it took up even 5 minutes of someone else's thoughts I'd be shocked.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Jul 31, 2020 20:48:50 GMT -5
NomoreDramaQ1015 you have more self-restraint than me. I'd be raising Hell over anyone saying that to my kid.
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finnime
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Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.
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Post by finnime on Aug 1, 2020 6:22:31 GMT -5
They DO sound like intensely negative people, NomoreDramaQ1015. Keeping that out of your family's business, limiting exposure to them, and coaching your DH and DDs to also not share, is all good advice. I know you do that to the extent you're able. And don't let them get to you. My DSis's former inlaws were also intensely negative. I had brunch over at their house a couple of times and they spent every minute gossiping in a mean, miserly way about other people I had no knowledge of. I don't get it. They didn't read, so I suppose they needed something to fill their days with.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Aug 1, 2020 6:56:26 GMT -5
They are and they are also really boring to me. I don't get the constant talk about salaries and stuff. There is so much more to the world to talk about. I often amuse myself at family gatherings because I have nothing to contribute I don't care about stuff and I can't compete in regards to salary.
I am also only 6 years older than DH's first nephew. I don't fit in with them because they are my brother's age but I don't fit in with DH's siblings and their relatives because they are closer to my parents age. It's a weird dynamic.
The kids have a good time which is all that matters, IMO. Having kids to focus my attention on has made it easier to deal with family gatherings. I can paste a smile on my face and pretend for a few hours. Don't get me wrong I love his parents and all I just don't like hanging out them with on a regular basis.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Aug 2, 2020 8:45:51 GMT -5
Wednesday is DD’s 9th birthday and I only 1 thing for her it so far. She was with me when I bought it, but I hid it in the cart and made her close her eyes and turn around when I checked out. In years past, I would have items sitting in my closet for her that I would get while I’m shopping by myself. With covid going around, I don’t shop like I used to as my DH is somewhat high risk. Also, she has plenty of things and what she really needs is clothes as she’s gone up a size.
She wants to do what she last year for her birthday, which was go to a water park, play mini golf, and go to the beach. We also stayed at my ILs then too, but that won’t be happening this year. We haven’t stayed my ILs for longer than an hour or so in 5 months due to everything (they are high risk). I have to work on her birthday this year (first time ever), but I’m taking off Thursday afternoon and all day Friday. I have no clue what we are doing, but I won’t be working. My BIL and SIL have a place in the same general area but nothing has been said about going there. If we did, there would be restrictions on what we do.
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Lizard Queen
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103/2024
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 2, 2020 11:02:22 GMT -5
I unfollowed nearly all of my DHs family on Facebook. They are totally in the white middle/upper middle class bubble, and regurgitate the stupid faux news lines. My MIL wasn't even aware that covid causes blood clots. With her age/health, you'd think she'd might want to know something like that. BIL was complaining how his MIL is being so careful about it. Well, she's high-risk, and you've been all over God's green earth during this! I mean, I like them in other ways, but I can't deal with the self-centered disconnect.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2020 10:02:15 GMT -5
I asked who said he could take all my bagged salads (which I was planning to have for dinner instead of a slice of pizza). His reply was, "so, I guess I should just buy all my own food from now on". I'm so done with this kid.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 3, 2020 10:23:26 GMT -5
OMG I'M GOING TO KILL HIM! Apparently him eating my food is not comparable because he has no income and I have a responsibility to feed my kids.
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Aug 3, 2020 10:36:40 GMT -5
OMG I'M GOING TO KILL HIM! Apparently him eating my food is not comparable because he has no income and I have a responsibility to feed my kids.
Not if he’s 18. He can feed himself. And good luck, MPL. I’d also be feeling homicidal rage in your shoes.
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chen35
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Post by chen35 on Aug 3, 2020 10:37:25 GMT -5
minnesotapaintlady we're having eerily similar conversations with the 20 year old. He's moving out in 2 weeks thank goodness. It will be better for everyone. I so feel your pain!
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Aug 3, 2020 10:42:41 GMT -5
All the feels about return to school. I just enrolled C this weekend. We opted for in person as that’s his preference, he definitely will learn better, and right now, DH and I are supposed to return to our office the same day school starts, so we won’t be home with him and I can’t leave him alone.
That said, I suspect we won’t be in school for long, if at all, based on cases in my area. Which also means work will probably push back the return to office date, but so far they haven’t. So who the heck knows. I also have feelings of guilt that I’m possibly endangering my kid, the teachers/staff at the school because more in person kids means more in person teachers, and that maybe we should just figure out a way to suck it up and do remote learning. Argh.
And also, daycare sent a message this weekend - the county health department updated their guidelines and now C has to wear a mask at daycare (all school aged kids do, but not the younger kids). He is fine with it, so that’s good, but I was selfishly hoping he’d get a couple more weeks of somewhat normal before school starts next month. It also pushes up my timeline to find the kid some more masks. We definitely need one for each weekday plus 2-3 extras.
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Peace77
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Post by Peace77 on Aug 3, 2020 10:42:44 GMT -5
MPL , Tell him that he's welcome to buy his own food and that he shouldn't have quit his job. Perhaps he needs to get another job quick. Start by looking at pizza restaurants.
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