The kid thread: Planning, pregnancy & parenting

[Pants]

Sept 22, 2018 16:46:09 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sanity check...

I have the husband who hosts weekly game nights. Last week he said one of the group has a birthday coming up and doesn't have the room to host a party at their parents house (yes she still lives at home) so she asked if she could have the party at our house since it's mostly gaming people. I thought it was a weird request but agreed. Dumb me didn't follow thru with party sat night in lieu of game night sun. This morning I was extra irritated that this party meant husband was downstairs cleaning the game area instead of helping with our typical sat household chores. Then we spent most of the day at vball tournament which also put us behind. We got home and the friend started decorating for the party. Then I overheard something about hiding gaming figures throughout the basement for people to find as a party game. That feels weird to me like they are going to be going thru our stuff to find these little characters. Down there is a living room space that they typically play in, a bathroom, a workshop, our office, laundry room, guest bedroom, and several storage areas and closets. Of course according to husband, I'm a buzz kill and overreacting. What say you?

I say that it's your house and you can determine what you're comfortable with. And also that your husband is ridiculous.

[regina24601]

Sept 22, 2018 17:24:09 GMT -5 Pants said:

Sept 22, 2018 16:46:09 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sanity check...

I have the husband who hosts weekly game nights. Last week he said one of the group has a birthday coming up and doesn't have the room to host a party at their parents house (yes she still lives at home) so she asked if she could have the party at our house since it's mostly gaming people. I thought it was a weird request but agreed. Dumb me didn't follow thru with party sat night in lieu of game night sun. This morning I was extra irritated that this party meant husband was downstairs cleaning the game area instead of helping with our typical sat household chores. Then we spent most of the day at vball tournament which also put us behind. We got home and the friend started decorating for the party. Then I overheard something about hiding gaming figures throughout the basement for people to find as a party game. That feels weird to me like they are going to be going thru our stuff to find these little characters. Down there is a living room space that they typically play in, a bathroom, a workshop, our office, laundry room, guest bedroom, and several storage areas and closets. Of course according to husband, I'm a buzz kill and overreacting. What say you?

I say that it's your house and you can determine what you're comfortable with. And also that your husband is ridiculous.

I think you should make this your screen name.

[Pants]

Sept 22, 2018 19:37:59 GMT -5 regina24601 said:

Sept 22, 2018 17:24:09 GMT -5 Pants said:

I say that it's your house and you can determine what you're comfortable with. And also that your husband is ridiculous.

I think you should make this your screen name.

I do say it a lot. I've run out of patience for the sheer number and caliber of man-children we've been collectively fooled into thinking are necessary or desirable.

[andi9899]

Sept 21, 2018 16:03:11 GMT -5 Poptart said:

If I never get married or have children it will be due to this thread. Holy sh*t, you guys make all of it sound like a nightmare. 

Then stop reading it.

[azucena]

Sept 22, 2018 16:58:36 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Sept 22, 2018 16:46:09 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sanity check...

I have the husband who hosts weekly game nights. Last week he said one of the group has a birthday coming up and doesn't have the room to host a party at their parents house (yes she still lives at home) so she asked if she could have the party at our house since it's mostly gaming people. I thought it was a weird request but agreed. Dumb me didn't follow thru with party sat night in lieu of game night sun. This morning I was extra irritated that this party meant husband was downstairs cleaning the game area instead of helping with our typical sat household chores. Then we spent most of the day at vball tournament which also put us behind. We got home and the friend started decorating for the party. Then I overheard something about hiding gaming figures throughout the basement for people to find as a party game. That feels weird to me like they are going to be going thru our stuff to find these little characters. Down there is a living room space that they typically play in, a bathroom, a workshop, our office, laundry room, guest bedroom, and several storage areas and closets. Of course according to husband, I'm a buzz kill and overreacting. What say you?

Unfortunately you missed the opportunity to say NO to Sunday but you probably would have gotten attitude anyway.

I ended up going out to dinner with a friend in an attempt to be healthier about the situation. I didn't tell him I was leaving, just walked out, guess that part wasn't mature lol. Had a nice time.

Came home to so many cars on our block, must be quite the party down there. Walk in and hear the bday girl say uh, oh I think azucena is home. Wtf. Glad you realize I left mad, maybe you won't feel comfortable hosting your next bday here. But she's so young and immature that she probably thinks I'm just a bitch.

Tomorrow we are going to have a come to Jesus talk.

[Pants]

Sept 22, 2018 20:13:44 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sept 22, 2018 16:58:36 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Unfortunately you missed the opportunity to say NO to Sunday but you probably would have gotten attitude anyway.

I ended up going out to dinner with a friend in an attempt to be healthier about the situation. I didn't tell him I was leaving, just walked out, guess that part wasn't mature lol. Had a nice time.

Came home to so many cars on our block, must be quite the party down there. Walk in and hear the bday girl say uh, oh I think azucena is home. Wtf. Glad you realize I left mad, maybe you won't feel comfortable hosting your next bday here. But she's so young and immature that she probably thinks I'm just a bitch.

Tomorrow we are going to have a come to Jesus talk.

What the hell?

[cktc]

Ugh I'd have been irritated by the idea of people looking through all my stuff too. I'm glad you had a nice evening out at least.

[zibazinski]

This is your home as well and the fact that no one else ever hosts is wrong.

[alabamagal]

My husband does something similar with his “hobby” friends. We have limits set on what can and can’t be done. I use the time as my “alone time”. I wouldn’t mind the party, but I would definitely be bothered by people looking through my stuff in the hide and seek game.

[zibazinski]

Sept 23, 2018 8:03:10 GMT -5 alabamagal said:

My husband does something similar with his “hobby” friends. We have limits set on what can and can’t be done. I use the time as my “alone time”. I wouldn’t mind the party, but I would definitely be bothered by people looking through my stuff in the hide and seek game.

Except this party happens every week and this was another party the same weekend

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Sept 23, 2018 5:27:03 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

This is your home as well and the fact that no one else ever hosts is wrong.

IIRC the guests all still live with their parents. They are mooching off the adults.

I am so grateful that for DH gaming is a solo sport.

[raeoflyte]

Sept 22, 2018 20:13:44 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sept 22, 2018 16:58:36 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Unfortunately you missed the opportunity to say NO to Sunday but you probably would have gotten attitude anyway.

I ended up going out to dinner with a friend in an attempt to be healthier about the situation. I didn't tell him I was leaving, just walked out, guess that part wasn't mature lol. Had a nice time.

Came home to so many cars on our block, must be quite the party down there. Walk in and hear the bday girl say uh, oh I think azucena is home. Wtf. Glad you realize I left mad, maybe you won't feel comfortable hosting your next bday here. But she's so young and immature that she probably thinks I'm just a bitch.

Tomorrow we are going to have a come to Jesus talk.

Good luck today!  I'd be super frustrated.  

[Wisconsin Beth]

I have a cousin with a sort of hobby farm. She's got chickens, goats, apet steer, cats, dogs and a couple of sheep. She hosted a family reunion today. I bailed on it but talked my mom into taking my kids so they could hang out with extended family for a couple of hours.

I got a call around 415 from my cousin, apologizing for my kids' injuries. Both kids got shocked by the electric fence. C got bit by the dogs. He's got 2 puncture wounds on his right hip and a more serious wound by his right knee.

My cousin was horrified that the kids got hurt. She assured me that the dogs are current on their shots. She's offering to pay for any doctor visits we may incur.

The kids were standing in puddles while trying to regain their balance. They grabbed the charged part of the fence. They don't seem to have any hurts from that.

I'm an unnatural mom in that I'm not super concerned about this. My cousin is a helluva lot more upset than I am.

I am.sending notes to school for C. I want the school nurse to exchange bandaid around lunchtime. If she feels it necessary to have him checked out, I will.

[msventoux]

I would be more worried about the dog bites than the electric fence. As a kid we used to test how bad we would get shocked by touching various materials to the fence-grass, branches, rope, etc. Sometimes we managed to stumble into the fences. Not a big deal. However, when you’re crawling under a fence and accidentally touch it with your head/hair, that will quickly drop you to the ground since you’re not expecting it. Good times.

[Pants]

Sept 23, 2018 20:12:43 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

I have a cousin with a sort of hobby farm. She's got chickens, goats, apet steer, cats, dogs and a couple of sheep. She hosted a family reunion today. I bailed on it but talked my mom into taking my kids so they could hang out with extended family for a couple of hours.

I got a call around 415 from my cousin, apologizing for my kids' injuries. Both kids got shocked by the electric fence. C got bit by the dogs. He's got 2 puncture wounds on his right hip and a more serious wound by his right knee.

My cousin was horrified that the kids got hurt. She assured me that the dogs are current on their shots. She's offering to pay for any doctor visits we may incur.

The kids were standing in puddles while trying to regain their balance. They grabbed the charged part of the fence. They don't seem to have any hurts from that.

I'm an unnatural mom in that I'm not super concerned about this. My cousin is a helluva lot more upset than I am.

I am.sending notes to school for C. I want the school nurse to exchange bandaid around lunchtime. If she feels it necessary to have him checked out, I will.

Is C up to date on his tetanus? That would be my main concern as long as dogs have their rabies vaccine. And if he might need stitches or wound cleaning.

Also, your son was attacked by a dog or dogs. That's... not good. Your cousin is right to be horrified. Animals get destroyed for that. Then the kids were mildly electrocuted. If nothing else, I'd be wary of the levels of supervision that was being provided in future. Accidents happen, but that was rather a lot of accidents for one day.

[Pants]

Sept 22, 2018 20:13:44 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sept 22, 2018 16:58:36 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Unfortunately you missed the opportunity to say NO to Sunday but you probably would have gotten attitude anyway.

I ended up going out to dinner with a friend in an attempt to be healthier about the situation. I didn't tell him I was leaving, just walked out, guess that part wasn't mature lol. Had a nice time.

Came home to so many cars on our block, must be quite the party down there. Walk in and hear the bday girl say uh, oh I think azucena is home. Wtf. Glad you realize I left mad, maybe you won't feel comfortable hosting your next bday here. But she's so young and immature that she probably thinks I'm just a bitch.

Tomorrow we are going to have a come to Jesus talk.

How did the talk go?

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

Sept 21, 2018 16:03:11 GMT -5 Poptart said:

If I never get married or have children it will be due to this thread. Holy sh*t, you guys make all of it sound like a nightmare. 

My second marriage is phenomenal. My youngest child is 16 and will graduate from high school this year. I’m honestly sad I didn’t have more children.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

Sept 23, 2018 20:12:43 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

I have a cousin with a sort of hobby farm. She's got chickens, goats, apet steer, cats, dogs and a couple of sheep. She hosted a family reunion today. I bailed on it but talked my mom into taking my kids so they could hang out with extended family for a couple of hours.

I got a call around 415 from my cousin, apologizing for my kids' injuries. Both kids got shocked by the electric fence. C got bit by the dogs. He's got 2 puncture wounds on his right hip and a more serious wound by his right knee.

My cousin was horrified that the kids got hurt. She assured me that the dogs are current on their shots. She's offering to pay for any doctor visits we may incur.

The kids were standing in puddles while trying to regain their balance. They grabbed the charged part of the fence. They don't seem to have any hurts from that.

I'm an unnatural mom in that I'm not super concerned about this. My cousin is a helluva lot more upset than I am.

I am.sending notes to school for C. I want the school nurse to exchange bandaid around lunchtime. If she feels it necessary to have him checked out, I will.

Well, I’d have the reaction your cousin is having. I’m glad she’s being upfront and honest with you.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

Sept 22, 2018 20:13:44 GMT -5 azucena said:

Sept 22, 2018 16:58:36 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Unfortunately you missed the opportunity to say NO to Sunday but you probably would have gotten attitude anyway.

I ended up going out to dinner with a friend in an attempt to be healthier about the situation. I didn't tell him I was leaving, just walked out, guess that part wasn't mature lol. Had a nice time.

Came home to so many cars on our block, must be quite the party down there. Walk in and hear the bday girl say uh, oh I think azucena is home. Wtf. Glad you realize I left mad, maybe you won't feel comfortable hosting your next bday here. But she's so young and immature that she probably thinks I'm just a bitch.

Tomorrow we are going to have a come to Jesus talk.

I do agree that you had your chance to say no. I’m not sure I’d have the patience for someone to have their party at my house because they couldn’t have it at their own parents house. However, I have teenagers at my house OFTEN, and this party sounds teenager-y to me.

It does sound like ground rules need to be redrawn between you and your husband.

How’d the come to Jesus go?

[zibazinski]

These aren’t teenagers, I hope. Adults living with parents because they’re gamers instead of fully employed? No way.

[Wisconsin Beth]

C is current on his shots too.

I sent him to school with notes requesting the school nurse change his bandaid around lunchtime. And asked that he not do gym class, if they have it today.

Modesty has kicked in for him so he is not thrilled about seeing the nurse but accepts that it has to happen. He doesn't want her to see his tummy or his tush/hip.

[Deleted]

Sept 21, 2018 16:03:11 GMT -5 Poptart said:

If I never get married or have children it will be due to this thread. Holy sh*t, you guys make all of it sound like a nightmare. 

I've been through two nasty divorces and I still don't regret getting married.  Even though they ended badly and it brought on some of the darkest days of my life, some of the happiest days were in there too. 

As for the kids, a lot of posting is during times of frustration when we're looking for advice or just a BTDT ear to vent to.  I'd say it's only about 10% nightmare for me right now. 

[steph08]

Sept 23, 2018 20:12:43 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

I have a cousin with a sort of hobby farm. She's got chickens, goats, apet steer, cats, dogs and a couple of sheep. She hosted a family reunion today. I bailed on it but talked my mom into taking my kids so they could hang out with extended family for a couple of hours.

I got a call around 415 from my cousin, apologizing for my kids' injuries. Both kids got shocked by the electric fence. C got bit by the dogs. He's got 2 puncture wounds on his right hip and a more serious wound by his right knee.

My cousin was horrified that the kids got hurt. She assured me that the dogs are current on their shots. She's offering to pay for any doctor visits we may incur.

The kids were standing in puddles while trying to regain their balance. They grabbed the charged part of the fence. They don't seem to have any hurts from that.

I'm an unnatural mom in that I'm not super concerned about this. My cousin is a helluva lot more upset than I am.

I am.sending notes to school for C. I want the school nurse to exchange bandaid around lunchtime. If she feels it necessary to have him checked out, I will.

I've watched too much Grey's Anatomy not to be completely horrified about what happened to your kids. I have a bunch of "What Ifs" running through my mind. I would definitely take them to the doctor to get checked out - especially the puncture wounds. I'd be worried about infection - even if the dogs are up-to-date on their shots, their mouths are teeming with bacteria. 

[muttleynfelix]

Sept 21, 2018 16:03:11 GMT -5 Poptart said:

If I never get married or have children it will be due to this thread. Holy sh*t, you guys make all of it sound like a nightmare. 

Remember this is our safe space to vent. So, you are heading 100% of the bad stuff and maybe 10% of the good.

For me, no it is not a nightmare. It isn't easy, but I wouldn't trade it for the peace of no kids or husband.

[muttleynfelix]

Starting Tuesday, Ben really had been good. He's been helpful and fun and has had a good attitude. It has been so wonderful. We've rewarded him too. We bought a bunch of donut holes at the grocery store and we let him get some for breakfast himself on Sunday.

All month, even when he was being a jerk, he's been helping me cook supper on the weekends. It is a lot of fun to cook with him.

[Wisconsin Beth]

My mil's bday is this week. We're hosting them on Saturday night. I asked K if she wanted to make the bday treat. She's excited about it. We're going to bake on Friday night, so we have time for a plan b, just in case we need one!

[raeoflyte]

I'm working on a bribery system for the kids for screen time (and that they can trade it in for actual money if they'd rather once a week).  Cooking/baking for the family is definitely going to be on the list, but I really need to get cooking with both of them more.  We managed some breakfasts over the summer, but I haven't kept up on having the kids do those themselves since school started.    

[Sam_2.0]

I buried myself in making mats this weekend. Pretty much ignored DH and the kids. I just needed a break. Got 4 mats made though! Only 19 more to go to hit my big goal of 100 total.

DH is in a rough spot. He's at least not being mean, but he's depressed and down so its back to doing most things solo.

T is starting to talk and its so funny. He even tries to say Alyvia! But when it comes to me, he just says "Dada!" Little turd. He can say up, down, no, uh huh (yes), uh oh, Aly, Alyvia, cracker, shoes....and still won't say Mama.

[Deleted]

Getting shocked by the electric fence happens and generally isn't a big deal.  If the dog bite wounds weren't bad, I'd just watch them, but I would be concerned about cousin having viscous dogs if my kids were ever going over there again.  Next time he might not be so lucky as to get away with just a few minor punctures.  I love dogs, but I don't have much tolerance for ones that bite...or for people that don't take precautions with dogs that can't be trusted.  Not saying your cousin knew they were biters, but she does now, so they should at the very least be locked up when company is over. 

[Lizard Queen]

Sept 24, 2018 9:40:05 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

I'm working on a bribery system for the kids for screen time (and that they can trade it in for actual money if they'd rather once a week).  Cooking/baking for the family is definitely going to be on the list, but I really need to get cooking with both of them more.  We managed some breakfasts over the summer, but I haven't kept up on having the kids do those themselves since school started.    

A few years ago, I made some "time tokens" out of small wooden disks and paint.  We had abandoned them after a while, but I'm thinking of going back to them.  Just need to figure out what chores will earn how much time for the kids.  The kids like the novel idea (ODS doesn't really remember when we had first used them.)  DH and I are tired of the entitled attitude we're getting for computer time, plus the complete lack of picking up after themselves/arguments about doing things when all they want to do is play on their computer/tablet/video game.