The kid thread: Planning, pregnancy & parenting

[Pants]

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

[Jaguar]

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

That is awesomesauce!

[econstudent]

Sept 15, 2017 20:12:03 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

DH went to urgent care
He has bronchitis with a bronchial infection. He got an inhaler, cough syrup and a steriod.

Oh boy. I hope the meds help quickly.

[tcu2003]

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

Love this! Way to go B and K!!

I can't wait for C to figure it out. He's known letters forever and has some sight words, but any "reading" he does is due to memorization. He loves books, so I'm excited for him when he figures out how awesome they are to read to yourself as well (not that I'm planning to stop reading to him even when he learns to read).

[tcu2003]

I'm spending my first night away from M and it's slightly breaking my heart. I didn't stay away from C overnight until after he turned 2, and had planned to do something similar with M, but a professional org I volunteer with is having a leadership retreat for one of its committees in Ft Lauderdale/Pompano Beach and I was invited due to the volunteer pieces I'm involved in. We looked at DH and M (and possibly C) flying down with me, but couldn't make the logistics work out, especially since they'll be going to Tampa with me for a conf in November. I'm flying back late tomorrow night instead of Sunday, so it's only one full night away (though DH has to get her to sleep both nights). She was crying and so pitiful tonight. She also still wakes in the middle of the night to nurse. There is plenty of milk in the fridge and freezer, so I know she'll be fine, but I'm still sad. Especially because I know she missed mama and doesn't understand.

Gah. DH can handle this, and I will enjoy a solid night of sleep, but I also already can't wait to get home to see both kiddos tomorrow night. But yay for pumping/nursing rooms and pods in airports that weren't there when I was pumping when C was a baby.

[azucena]

Sept 15, 2017 13:58:48 GMT -5 cktc said:

Sept 15, 2017 13:38:59 GMT -5 MJ2.0 said:

I'm looking at booster seats since DS has outgrown his convertible seat.  The Graco one I'm looking at is for kids 40-100lbs.... 100lbs?!  Why does a kid nearing 100lbs need to be in a booster seat?  I get the whole "keep them in the back for a while thing" because of the airbags, but I do not understand the obsession with keeping bigger kids in a booster seat for ages.

Boosters are about height and where the seat belt hits. Maybe some kids are nearing 100 lbs before they reach 4'9"?

My DD is tall for her age and weighed 90 lbs at age 9 when I "finally" let her out of the booster seat. I read a lot of carseat info and how to tell if the seat belt fits correctly and for her it legitimately didn't until age 9 even though she is a bigger kid. So I was that mom who was mean even though everyone else in her class was out of them at age 8 which is the law here in MO. Now, I see way too many kids in her class riding in the front seat. And the parents say it's okay, the airbag is turned off. SMH!

[lurkyloo]

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

[lurkyloo]

Re activities:  DS is in gymnastics twice a week and swimming once, plus we have his nanny take him to recreational swim 2-3x a week bc that's by far the best way to wear him out.  He also does piano mini lessons at daycare and soccer at daycare when the schedule works.  We had him in more, but I think that wound up just being too much for all of us...as it is, the post-work activities are a little iffy because he sometimes runs out of patience and cooperativity by then.  Plus, a 30 min swim lesson or a 45 min gymnastics class doesn't reliably wear him out.  Ice skating was getting frustrating for him (he said he still wanted to do it, but pretty sure he just wanted the ice cream break afterwards!) and he was regressing; soccer he wasn't really cooperating either.  I might sign him up for (indoor) Sunday morning soccer when it gets too cold to play outside as much.

Gymnastics runs around $20 per class for 12-week sessions; the swimming runs $9-12 per class for 6 sessions.  I think soccer was $115 for maybe eight sessions?  And ice skating was $105 for six sessions.  All but gymnastics was through the rec dept.  I signed him up for non-parent swim lessons starting next session and I'm interested/worried to see whether it works.  Wincing a little at the price of private ones if we have to go that route, those are like $270 for six sessions.

[zibazinski]

Sept 16, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

[

Freaking A, he's 4!! WTH is going on there? This does not sound like a good fit. Fine motor skills especially for boys takes a long time to develop if ever.

[Deleted]

Sept 16, 2017 9:33:50 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Sept 16, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

[

Freaking A, he's 4!! WTH is going on there? This does not sound like a good fit. Fine motor skills especially for boys takes a long time to develop if ever.

I'm still trying to get my 15 year old to hold a fork correctly!!  (I'm not kidding his fine motor does suck).

My 7 year old's writing is still pretty bad and while they teach them cursive I tell him to PRINT for his spelling tests.  Even if it's huge, block, capital letters.  At least it's legible enough to know he knew how to spell the word. 

[Pants]

Sept 16, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

That's messed up. Large letters and all caps is absolutely expected at 4. B is in Kindergarten now and they are just now practicing small letters on purpose and writing in between spaced lines.

[Wisconsin Beth]

We think 1st grade is when the kids'school started pushing using mixed upper and lower letters.

I'm signing K up for a 3 week cooking class for $17 via the local recreation guide. It's like 2 hours on Saturday mornings. If the timing works out, one of K's friends may join us.

[lurkyloo]

Thanks all for the support    DS is constantly wavering between "late bloomer but normal" and "special needs but very high functioning", so I'm way over sensitized to these judgements.  

[Deleted]

I think that teacher is whackadoodle nitpicking him like that. 

[dee27]

Sept 16, 2017 14:25:53 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Thanks all for the support    DS is constantly wavering between "late bloomer but normal" and "special needs but very high functioning", so I'm way over sensitized to these judgements.  

It sounds like the current teacher and your DS are not a good fit. When kids are young, parents should be their strongest advocates. 

[zibazinski]

I probably shouldn't say anymore because I'm riled up for your son. 

[Pants]

Sept 16, 2017 14:25:53 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Thanks all for the support    DS is constantly wavering between "late bloomer but normal" and "special needs but very high functioning", so I'm way over sensitized to these judgements.  

Hugs. Even without any learning delays, the teachers expectations are insanely out of whack. I've spent the last year looking at the handwriting of various 4-year-olds and they are all giant all-caps masterpieces. 

[Deleted]

Sept 16, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

My daughter held my oldest granddaughter back for kindergarten a second year because of fine motor skills.  I think it was 4k that she repeated, not actual kindergarten since that's the new "first grade."  She has a July birthday, and my daughter knew from experience with my grandson (B's brother) that the teacher was a stickler for printing "correctly."  B is a sensitive child, a people pleaser like her mother, and my daughter didn't want her feelings hurt.  B starts third grade next year and has beautiful handwriting.

Anyway, my sister, a former elementary teacher who now teaches elementary education college courses, told her to buy "sewing cards" (the ones where you thread in and out) to improve her fine motor skills.   B loved them, and it did help. 

[Deleted]

Sept 16, 2017 14:31:52 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I think that teacher is whackadoodle nitpicking him like that. 

Whackadoodle is a whole lot nicer than what I was thinking...

[zibazinski]

Sept 16, 2017 15:00:00 GMT -5 oped said:

Sept 16, 2017 14:31:52 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I think that teacher is whackadoodle nitpicking him like that. 

Whackadoodle is a whole lot nicer than what I was thinking...

[Wisconsin Beth]

Sept 16, 2017 14:34:10 GMT -5 dee27 said:

Sept 16, 2017 14:25:53 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Thanks all for the support    DS is constantly wavering between "late bloomer but normal" and "special needs but very high functioning", so I'm way over sensitized to these judgements.  

It sounds like the current teacher and your DS are not a good fit. When kids are young, parents should be their strongest advocates. 

I asked for C's current 2nd grade teacher because I thought they'd be a good fit. His 1st grade teacher agreed.

[yogiii]

Sept 16, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Sept 15, 2017 20:21:58 GMT -5 Pants said:

Bear with me - straight up mom brag coming up here.

- B started kindergarten 3 weeks ago and is now like legit reading. Has maybe 30 sight words (up from maybe 5) and working on phonics. She's also good at context guessing what a word is. Just, like, overnight.
- Out of nowhere K started reading letters. We have an alphabet book and she picks it up and reads about 20 out of 26 letters. Any letter she doesn't know she subs in a letter of her own invention "Che."

My girls are so smart. <3

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

My DD is 4 and her teacher is all "Wow, I can't believe she uses lowercase".  They really don't get into that here until kindergarten.  Her handwriting is about as good as her 7y/o brother and his is not bad.  Most boys in general at that age lag behind most girls with fine motor skills, I have to wonder who she is comparing him to.  I'm guessing he's in a very similar boat to the rest of the boys in his class.

[econstudent]

Sept 15, 2017 21:20:27 GMT -5 tcu2003 said:

I'm spending my first night away from M and it's slightly breaking my heart. I didn't stay away from C overnight until after he turned 2, and had planned to do something similar with M, but a professional org I volunteer with is having a leadership retreat for one of its committees in Ft Lauderdale/Pompano Beach and I was invited due to the volunteer pieces I'm involved in. We looked at DH and M (and possibly C) flying down with me, but couldn't make the logistics work out, especially since they'll be going to Tampa with me for a conf in November. I'm flying back late tomorrow night instead of Sunday, so it's only one full night away (though DH has to get her to sleep both nights). She was crying and so pitiful tonight. She also still wakes in the middle of the night to nurse. There is plenty of milk in the fridge and freezer, so I know she'll be fine, but I'm still sad. Especially because I know she missed mama and doesn't understand.

Gah. DH can handle this, and I will enjoy a solid night of sleep, but I also already can't wait to get home to see both kiddos tomorrow night. But yay for pumping/nursing rooms and pods in airports that weren't there when I was pumping when C was a baby.

Hugs. I hope the night goes okay. A is a little older I think (18 months today) but I haven't left her overnight yet either. She still nurses at night but no longer takes a bottle or even a sippy with milk so I worry that she'll be inconsolable. Or that she'll just wake up and not go back to sleep. I might have to travel overnight in November so we'll see.

I have heard about those pods that have been popping up. They seem like they'd be great for pumping on the go!

[zibazinski]

Sept 16, 2017 16:38:03 GMT -5 yogiii said:

Sept 16, 2017 8:59:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

I think I'm gonna give up on DS' current teacher and agitate to have him moved up to the next class, where all his friends and an adored/awesome teacher went.  Bad enough how much he misses them (and they miss him too), but yesterday he wrote his name with some minor prompting, took it to show his current teacher, and she started bitching about how big his letters are and how he needs to use lowercase letters.     He turned 4 in June and has a mild fine motor delay, so this is big progress for him--in my world, that does not call for criticism.   

My DD is 4 and her teacher is all "Wow, I can't believe she uses lowercase".  They really don't get into that here until kindergarten.  Her handwriting is about as good as her 7y/o brother and his is not bad.  Most boys in general at that age lag behind most girls with fine motor skills, I have to wonder who she is comparing him to.  I'm guessing he's in a very similar boat to the rest of the boys in his class.

It doesn't matter who she's comparing him to. She needs to shut her mouth unless it is encouraging him. He's freaking 4 years old! 

[muttleynfelix]

Sept 16, 2017 17:56:43 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Sept 16, 2017 16:38:03 GMT -5 yogiii said:

My DD is 4 and her teacher is all "Wow, I can't believe she uses lowercase".  They really don't get into that here until kindergarten.  Her handwriting is about as good as her 7y/o brother and his is not bad.  Most boys in general at that age lag behind most girls with fine motor skills, I have to wonder who she is comparing him to.  I'm guessing he's in a very similar boat to the rest of the boys in his class.

It doesn't matter who she's comparing him to. She needs to shut her mouth unless it is encouraging him. He's freaking 4 years old! 

I can't think of a single academic thing that a teacher of a 4 year old should nitpick about. Being kind? Hand washing? Using the potty? Picking up after themselves? Those are things that are appropriate to nitpick IMO. But what do i know.

[zibazinski]

Sept 16, 2017 21:36:47 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

Sept 16, 2017 17:56:43 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

It doesn't matter who she's comparing him to. She needs to shut her mouth unless it is encouraging him. He's freaking 4 years old! 

I can't think of a single academic thing that a teacher of a 4 year old should nitpick about. Being kind? Hand washing? Using the potty? Picking up after themselves? Those are things that are appropriate to nitpick IMO. But what do i know.

A lot more than that teacher does. Grrr

[alabamagal]

My DS who really sucked at all those things that are important in kindergarten is now a very successful young man he never conformed to what was expected of young students. His motor skills sucked. His handwriting was atrocious. Paying attention, following instructions, being prepared for class - he struggled with those. In 3rd grade, his teacher counted off 5 points for not putting your name on your paper, so we just expected to get 95 on his tests.

So he graduated college with honors and now is pursuing a very successful career. Always tempted to go back to his teachers and show them their "problem child"

[yogiii]

Sept 16, 2017 17:56:43 GMT -5 zibazinski said:

Sept 16, 2017 16:38:03 GMT -5 yogiii said:

My DD is 4 and her teacher is all "Wow, I can't believe she uses lowercase".  They really don't get into that here until kindergarten.  Her handwriting is about as good as her 7y/o brother and his is not bad.  Most boys in general at that age lag behind most girls with fine motor skills, I have to wonder who she is comparing him to.  I'm guessing he's in a very similar boat to the rest of the boys in his class.

It doesn't matter who she's comparing him to. She needs to shut her mouth unless it is encouraging him. He's freaking 4 years old! 

Definitely.  It sounds like maybe teaching isn't for her.

[zibazinski]

DS had a 1st grade teacher who constantly criticized him. I still blame myself for not removing him from her class. She was only teaching because her son was in college then medical school and she wanted him to have no loans. I get working for a living but teaching wasn't for her.

[lurkyloo]

It's ok, zib.  DS is a really, really frustrating kid especially when he's upset by a transition and I expect that she was influenced by some of that frustration showing through.  The incident was immediately preceded by her telling me he'd broken something and their management didn't like replacing things (Montessori educational stuff is expensive!  I looked at getting some and the prices were ridiculous).  I do think this isn't a great fit (the outgoing teacher was also concerned) but we are also trying to encourage some emotional growth here, dealing with adversity and whatnot...plus I think it isn't worth switching him to another classroom where everything is unfamiliar.  I'll talk to the director and other teacher about maybe moving him up in November.  That will give us some time to work more on skills.  Right now when he writes his four-letter name it takes up an entire 8.5x11 page, but he tries to keep letter practice inside the guidelines when asked.

I pulled him out of a school last year where he was completely miserable and acting out because of it.  I thought and still think that teacher was just awful with kids who aren't perfectly behaved (at age 3!!).  He's still okay with going to this school, and the management has been very helpful and supportive. Asking a lot about staying home or moving up to the next class though.

The school definitely has higher standards and benchmarks than the public system (which is itself highly regarded); my coworker described his daughter being way ahead of her peers when she started public kindergarten.  I have rarely been more flummoxed than when DS' classmate (maybe 3-5 months older) was excitedly showing me how he was doing an addition worksheet...on his own, I might add    I mean, super sweet kid and one of DS' best friends...but at 4.5!

Thanks susanna for the tip on the sewing cards; I was looking at them on Amazon last night.  And DS picked out some iron-together bead craft supplies at Ikea last night...we'll see if I can get him to sit still long enough to finish any of it!  Mostly there are just some things that he doesn't do automatically but picks up ok with some coaching.  I suppose that's the whole point of early intervention.