Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2017 13:13:04 GMT -5
If you are out of book-book room, an audible subscription would be cool!
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Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2017 13:14:06 GMT -5
BY the way, audible kids sale ends today... TONS of awesome kids books 3.95 and under.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Aug 27, 2017 13:57:14 GMT -5
It is around here. That's crazy! But I live in a big medical area. They can't get enough LPNs and RNs. I just looked up the starting wage on Mayos site and it's $17.22 in FL and $19.22 in MN for regular day shift hours. No nights or swing shift for that rate. Wow, the highest I have seen for an LPN is $13/hr at Nebraska Med with 12+ hour rotating shifts or on call only. Most LPNs are hired at local nursing homes. You can make a decent amount with an RN but they are slowly phasing them out as well. The hospitals will hire RNs but expect them to get their BSN within a certain amount of time after hire. Lots go thru the RN to BSN program thru UNMC's nursing program. Gone at least here are the days of getting a cushy shift, hiring bonuses and great wages unless you are highly specialized with your BSN or MSN. Being a nurse is still what I would consider a good paying job but I wouldn't tell anyone I know to go into it because it's "hot" and they will "make a ton of money".
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Aug 27, 2017 14:04:20 GMT -5
That's crazy! But I live in a big medical area. They can't get enough LPNs and RNs. I just looked up the starting wage on Mayos site and it's $17.22 in FL and $19.22 in MN for regular day shift hours. No nights or swing shift for that rate. Wow, the highest I have seen for an LPN is $13/hr at Nebraska Med with 12+ hour rotating shifts or on call only. Most LPNs are hired at local nursing homes. You can make a decent amount with an RN but they are slowly phasing them out as well. The hospitals will hire RNs but expect them to get their BSN within a certain amount of time after hire. Lots go thru the RN to BSN program thru UNMC's nursing program. Gone at least here are the days of getting a cushy shift, hiring bonuses and great wages unless you are highly specialized with your BSN or MSN. Being a nurse is still what I would consider a good paying job but I wouldn't tell anyone I know to go into it because it's "hot" and they will "make a ton of money". Me either but she likes nursing so she might as well get paid decently
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pooks
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Post by pooks on Aug 27, 2017 14:05:15 GMT -5
Talking of 529 - when did you start one? Have a particular goal in mind to put away / per month / per year ? Carlie is almost 8 months old and we still have not started the savings account for her or the 529. I guess the fact she is still a baby makes it easier to postpone it and keep postponing it? We started at 11 and that was way too late. Because of the late start, we put 10K away each year since then. Her grandparents haven't contributed anything, but they are generous in other ways. We are grandparents now and put $100 away a month in each grandchild's 529.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Aug 27, 2017 14:06:37 GMT -5
I wouldn't need to switch careers if I had a dollar for every person who has told me 'Become a nurse you'll make a ton!" Have you looked at what the going pay for nurses in our area is? And shouldn't wanting to be a nurse involve more than just seeing dollar signs?
I would imagine that's a job you'd burn out fast from if you were in it solely for a paycheck. I can think of a lot less emotionally draining and yucky jobs I could do solely for a paycheck.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 27, 2017 14:14:48 GMT -5
If you are out of book-book room, an audible subscription would be cool! I would love that! I'll have to check out the sale too.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 27, 2017 14:22:42 GMT -5
Today I started wondering if my marriage can survive me going back to school. I used to think I was out of patience, but it's nothing compared to what I'm like now. And then I wonder if it would be better to have him to work full time to contribute more financially and just accept that we *have* to hire shit out to keep up, or better to bite the bullet and have him just stay home, and he could do more at home to take stuff off my plate. Not that I feel like either option is an actual option to pursue at this point, but I'm just so tired that my frustration level with dh is through the roof.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2017 14:40:06 GMT -5
That's crazy! But I live in a big medical area. They can't get enough LPNs and RNs. I just looked up the starting wage on Mayos site and it's $17.22 in FL and $19.22 in MN for regular day shift hours. No nights or swing shift for that rate. Wow, the highest I have seen for an LPN is $13/hr at Nebraska Med with 12+ hour rotating shifts or on call only. Most LPNs are hired at local nursing homes. You can make a decent amount with an RN but they are slowly phasing them out as well. The hospitals will hire RNs but expect them to get their BSN within a certain amount of time after hire. Lots go thru the RN to BSN program thru UNMC's nursing program. Gone at least here are the days of getting a cushy shift, hiring bonuses and great wages unless you are highly specialized with your BSN or MSN. Being a nurse is still what I would consider a good paying job but I wouldn't tell anyone I know to go into it because it's "hot" and they will "make a ton of money". My cousin makes $24/hour doing home health, but there are no benefits, and if something happens like your client dies, you can be out of work for awhile until they line you up somebody else. It's a good gig if you're married and have a spouse that provides the benefits. She's not, but doesn't seem to care about the benefits part. Her kid's Dad covers their insurance and I doubt she is thinking at all about retirement...she's never been the best with long-term thought process. She's had plenty of offers from employers to pay for her RN, but she's never been interested. Been an LPN for 16 years now.
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chen35
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Post by chen35 on Aug 27, 2017 14:40:56 GMT -5
I'm sorry Rae I can't even imagine the stress you are under. Honest question, would your life be more or less stressful if you got divorced?
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chen35
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Post by chen35 on Aug 27, 2017 14:42:00 GMT -5
Duplicate post
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Aug 27, 2017 15:03:07 GMT -5
You know how people tell you "oh, you'll miss doing *this* with the kids when they are gone"?
Well, I don't think I'll ever miss going grocery shopping with kids. Ever.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 27, 2017 15:09:50 GMT -5
I'm sorry Rae I can't even imagine the stress you are under. Honest question, would your life be more or less stressful if you got divorced? So much more stressful. I can't imagine managing C's care between 2 houses. Even before that dx when we were in therapy, divorce to me means that we move into separate units of the triplex I own with my parents so that we can manage the kids schedules basically how we do now. I would still be financially responsible for dh in many ways, possibly forever, and I love him even if I simultaneously want to smother him in his sleep. He has his own health issues that complicate things. He isn't a hard worker like my parents are, but he isn't lazy either. Divorce for me really isn't an option. I'm not sure how long my dh will be able to live with my growing bitchiness that is directed towards him so often though...and I wonder if he'll decide it's an option for him. Which mostly screws him, but I'd still feel responsible for the fall out. Plus I don't like being a bitch. Grand scheme of things this is temporary, but I'm looking at another 4 years most likely which isn't anything to sneeze at. I'm going to look at just budgeting in lawn and housekeeping. I've been trying so hard not to, but chances are $2400 a year in that category would increase marital happiness exponentially, or at least decrease the amount of pillow smothering thoughts.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Aug 27, 2017 15:19:23 GMT -5
Wow, the highest I have seen for an LPN is $13/hr at Nebraska Med with 12+ hour rotating shifts or on call only. Most LPNs are hired at local nursing homes. You can make a decent amount with an RN but they are slowly phasing them out as well. The hospitals will hire RNs but expect them to get their BSN within a certain amount of time after hire. Lots go thru the RN to BSN program thru UNMC's nursing program. Gone at least here are the days of getting a cushy shift, hiring bonuses and great wages unless you are highly specialized with your BSN or MSN. Being a nurse is still what I would consider a good paying job but I wouldn't tell anyone I know to go into it because it's "hot" and they will "make a ton of money". My cousin makes $24/hour doing home health, but there are no benefits, and if something happens like your client dies, you can be out of work for awhile until they line you up somebody else. It's a good gig if you're married and have a spouse that provides the benefits. She's not, but doesn't seem to care about the benefits part. Her kid's Dad covers their insurance and I doubt she is thinking at all about retirement...she's never been the best with long-term thought process. She's had plenty of offers from employers to pay for her RN, but she's never been interested. Been an LPN for 16 years now. Home Health pays $9/hr here. One of those areas where I really fear I would get what I pay for. Rae I hear you on school. Even with DH helping it's still rough and I am only taking ONE class. I took for granted having no life outside of college 10 years ago. It's so much harder with a full time job and a family. I told DH I am getting real sick of those University of Phoenix commercials with the mom sitting peacefully at the kitchen table doing her homework while her kids smile serenely at her in the background. I want to see a commercial where one kid is beating on the gate screaming for something while the husband is running around trying to diaper the second, the dog is peeing on the floor and work is texting her 20x wanting them to help her locate something in the freezer. DH said if they did that the colleges would go bankrupt because nobody would go back to school.
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Aug 27, 2017 15:37:24 GMT -5
Today I started wondering if my marriage can survive me going back to school. I used to think I was out of patience, but it's nothing compared to what I'm like now. And then I wonder if it would be better to have him to work full time to contribute more financially and just accept that we *have* to hire shit out to keep up, or better to bite the bullet and have him just stay home, and he could do more at home to take stuff off my plate. Not that I feel like either option is an actual option to pursue at this point, but I'm just so tired that my frustration level with dh is through the roof. Not sure what is going on in your marriage. However, I would highly advise you not to bit the bullet and just have him stay home. This will only make things worse in my opinion.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2017 15:58:56 GMT -5
Home Health pays $9/hr here. One of those areas where I really fear I would get what I pay for. They pay 14 year old's more than that to work at McDonalds here.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 27, 2017 16:26:26 GMT -5
Today I started wondering if my marriage can survive me going back to school. I used to think I was out of patience, but it's nothing compared to what I'm like now. And then I wonder if it would be better to have him to work full time to contribute more financially and just accept that we *have* to hire shit out to keep up, or better to bite the bullet and have him just stay home, and he could do more at home to take stuff off my plate. Not that I feel like either option is an actual option to pursue at this point, but I'm just so tired that my frustration level with dh is through the roof. Not sure what is going on in your marriage. However, I would highly advise you not to bit the bullet and just have him stay home. This will only make things worse in my opinion. It really isn't an option right now (obviously everything IS an option all the time, but this isn't one that is being discussed or even considered right now). I totally understand the risk and concern especially since his lack of household contribution is my constant complaint. But the times that dh is off (he's done 3 7 week fmla leaves in the last 8 years, and a 4 week unemployment gap when we were very young) everything goes smoother. The house stays clean, he takes on projects, he's up when I'm up, and we just click. Obviously those are all fairly short periods of times, but his job and the shift he's on are very demanding and take a lot out of him, so when he isn't doing that he can do a lot more at home. That job with the issues is a choice and a choice that he isn't willing to give up so there would be that to consider too. Although none of this is really on the table unless something else seriously changes in our lives so a pretty moot point.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Aug 27, 2017 16:39:43 GMT -5
Today I started wondering if my marriage can survive me going back to school. I used to think I was out of patience, but it's nothing compared to what I'm like now. And then I wonder if it would be better to have him to work full time to contribute more financially and just accept that we *have* to hire shit out to keep up, or better to bite the bullet and have him just stay home, and he could do more at home to take stuff off my plate. Not that I feel like either option is an actual option to pursue at this point, but I'm just so tired that my frustration level with dh is through the roof. Would he do more?
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Aug 27, 2017 16:41:30 GMT -5
Talking of 529 - when did you start one? Have a particular goal in mind to put away / per month / per year ? Carlie is almost 8 months old and we still have not started the savings account for her or the 529. I guess the fact she is still a baby makes it easier to postpone it and keep postponing it? Lol, Aly is 6 and we don't have one for her yet. You have time. Don't want to wait for too long since it is also part of tax planning for this year and following years (we can contribute up to 4K each and lower our adjusted gross income). The savings account can wait but that is the one my mom is nagging about all the time since she wants to start putting money in there for her. So need to get around to opening all 3.
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chen35
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Post by chen35 on Aug 27, 2017 17:15:22 GMT -5
I'm sorry Rae I can't even imagine the stress you are under. Honest question, would your life be more or less stressful if you got divorced? So much more stressful. I can't imagine managing C's care between 2 houses. Even before that dx when we were in therapy, divorce to me means that we move into separate units of the triplex I own with my parents so that we can manage the kids schedules basically how we do now. I would still be financially responsible for dh in many ways, possibly forever, and I love him even if I simultaneously want to smother him in his sleep. He has his own health issues that complicate things. He isn't a hard worker like my parents are, but he isn't lazy either. Divorce for me really isn't an option. I'm not sure how long my dh will be able to live with my growing bitchiness that is directed towards him so often though...and I wonder if he'll decide it's an option for him. Which mostly screws him, but I'd still feel responsible for the fall out. Plus I don't like being a bitch. Grand scheme of things this is temporary, but I'm looking at another 4 years most likely which isn't anything to sneeze at. I'm going to look at just budgeting in lawn and housekeeping. I've been trying so hard not to, but chances are $2400 a year in that category would increase marital happiness exponentially, or at least decrease the amount of pillow smothering thoughts. Even with DH staying home we have the neighbor kid do the lawn and someone comes and deep cleans every few weeks. It's worth the cost to save that stress on our marriage. I'd say do it if you can in any way afford it.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 27, 2017 17:27:22 GMT -5
So much more stressful. I can't imagine managing C's care between 2 houses. Even before that dx when we were in therapy, divorce to me means that we move into separate units of the triplex I own with my parents so that we can manage the kids schedules basically how we do now. I would still be financially responsible for dh in many ways, possibly forever, and I love him even if I simultaneously want to smother him in his sleep. He has his own health issues that complicate things. He isn't a hard worker like my parents are, but he isn't lazy either. Divorce for me really isn't an option. I'm not sure how long my dh will be able to live with my growing bitchiness that is directed towards him so often though...and I wonder if he'll decide it's an option for him. Which mostly screws him, but I'd still feel responsible for the fall out. Plus I don't like being a bitch. Grand scheme of things this is temporary, but I'm looking at another 4 years most likely which isn't anything to sneeze at. I'm going to look at just budgeting in lawn and housekeeping. I've been trying so hard not to, but chances are $2400 a year in that category would increase marital happiness exponentially, or at least decrease the amount of pillow smothering thoughts. Even with DH staying home we have the neighbor kid do the lawn and someone comes and deep cleans every few weeks. It's worth the cost to save that stress on our marriage. I'd say do it if you can in any way afford it. I've set up the bi-monthly lawn folks and am looking at housekeepers. As I typed it out here I realized how stupid it was to be this stressed out, when I know that this will make things easier on me. Housekeeping prices are freaking insane. I'm hoping the person who did the move out clean at our rental a few months ago will do some regular housekeeping too. She was great and reasonably priced. And I feel like I have to add again that dh isn't lazy. He does so much of C's medical care, that I really don't know that him working full time will be an option for many years, and he does housework, animal care, and less frequently lawn work. But there is just so much to do all the flipping time and we are falling farther and farther behind. I know that no one is perfect, and you don't know what goes on behind closed doors. I live in a neighborhood of sahm/d, so I shouldn't compare myself to them but I do, and it just seems like them, their homes, and their yards are just always put together that I kind of hate them for it.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 27, 2017 17:28:58 GMT -5
I had a dream last night that B has terminal cancer and we chose not to treat it at all after what she went through last year. I've been awake for an hour and I'm only 75% sure it was a dream. So shaken up.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Aug 27, 2017 18:22:46 GMT -5
Not sure what is going on in your marriage. However, I would highly advise you not to bit the bullet and just have him stay home. This will only make things worse in my opinion. It really isn't an option right now (obviously everything IS an option all the time, but this isn't one that is being discussed or even considered right now). I totally understand the risk and concern especially since his lack of household contribution is my constant complaint. But the times that dh is off (he's done 3 7 week fmla leaves in the last 8 years, and a 4 week unemployment gap when we were very young) everything goes smoother. The house stays clean, he takes on projects, he's up when I'm up, and we just click. Obviously those are all fairly short periods of times, but his job and the shift he's on are very demanding and take a lot out of him, so when he isn't doing that he can do a lot more at home. That job with the issues is a choice and a choice that he isn't willing to give up so there would be that to consider too. Although none of this is really on the table unless something else seriously changes in our lives so a pretty moot point. OK, so I know how this is going to sound, but are you sure?? I *think* I remember you being very frustrated with him not doing things that needed to be done even when he wasn't working and you were getting overwhelmed working and still needing to do things around the house. In any case, I hope you know I only wish you the bestest!
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Aug 27, 2017 18:23:35 GMT -5
Not sure what is going on in your marriage. However, I would highly advise you not to bit the bullet and just have him stay home. This will only make things worse in my opinion. It really isn't an option right now (obviously everything IS an option all the time, but this isn't one that is being discussed or even considered right now). I totally understand the risk and concern especially since his lack of household contribution is my constant complaint. But the times that dh is off (he's done 3 7 week fmla leaves in the last 8 years, and a 4 week unemployment gap when we were very young) everything goes smoother. The house stays clean, he takes on projects, he's up when I'm up, and we just click. Obviously those are all fairly short periods of times, but his job and the shift he's on are very demanding and take a lot out of him, so when he isn't doing that he can do a lot more at home. That job with the issues is a choice and a choice that he isn't willing to give up so there would be that to consider too. Although none of this is really on the table unless something else seriously changes in our lives so a pretty moot point. OK, I don't really know your situation. Just making a general point that if you go down to one income, that will create other stressors perhaps. Something to think about. Also, i would look at the long term of someone being out of the workplace. Those are years that one does not contribute to social security. Years where he isn't adding to his work retirement or 401k. And, potentially lost promotions and workplace skills. So, consider the long term as well as the short term. There are pros and cons either way.
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econstudent
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Post by econstudent on Aug 27, 2017 18:26:28 GMT -5
Rae- it seems like you both have a lot going on. I'm sure that managing C's condition takes a lot out of you. Do you think there is anything you can simply/streamline to take some stress off of both of you? I know that sounds like an obvious question and I'm sorry about that. For us, that means no weeknight activities (for the kids or us), keeping things decluttered to cut down on cleaning time, and and grocery delivery or pickup to keep us from spending the weekend in the grocery store. Also, we chose to live somewhere close to (my) work and the kids school/daycare. The lack of commute helps tremendously but obviously that's not something that's easy to change.
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dee27
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Post by dee27 on Aug 27, 2017 18:46:38 GMT -5
Rae, I am sorry you are stressed, but you do have a full plate. Enjoy the few moments of sanity after the lawn is mowed and the house is cleaned by hired help.
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regina24601
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Post by regina24601 on Aug 27, 2017 18:52:13 GMT -5
Lol, Aly is 6 and we don't have one for her yet. You have time. Don't want to wait for too long since it is also part of tax planning for this year and following years (we can contribute up to 4K each and lower our adjusted gross income). The savings account can wait but that is the one my mom is nagging about all the time since she wants to start putting money in there for her. So need to get around to opening all 3. Contributions are not tax deductible. Some states do have a deduction for state tax purposes, but many do not. (And the ones that do are often not worth it, as some state programs have very high fees and poor investment choices.)
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dee27
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Post by dee27 on Aug 27, 2017 19:01:38 GMT -5
However, the earnings are tax free for 529 plans.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2017 19:30:36 GMT -5
Don't want to wait for too long since it is also part of tax planning for this year and following years (we can contribute up to 4K each and lower our adjusted gross income). The savings account can wait but that is the one my mom is nagging about all the time since she wants to start putting money in there for her. So need to get around to opening all 3. Contributions are not tax deductible. Some states do have a deduction for state tax purposes, but many do not. (And the ones that do are often not worth it, as some state programs have very high fees and poor investment choices.) Actually 34 states have a deduction now (not mine sadly) and 5 states even allow a deduction if you contribute to another state's plan. DC has an insane tax rate, so if I was Carl I'd for sure look at their plan before investing elsewhere.
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Peace77
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Post by Peace77 on Aug 27, 2017 20:52:46 GMT -5
Lol, Aly is 6 and we don't have one for her yet. You have time. Don't want to wait for too long since it is also part of tax planning for this year and following years (we can contribute up to 4K each and lower our adjusted gross income). The savings account can wait but that is the one my mom is nagging about all the time since she wants to start putting money in there for her. So need to get around to opening all 3. If your Mom wants to contribute to a savings account, take $5 and open one. Look for one paying at least 1% Interest and no fees. I would wait to contribute to a 529 plan until after you pay off your student loans.
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