nidena
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Post by nidena on Jun 25, 2022 11:19:09 GMT -5
I'm discovering there are far more hours in the day than I can pack with activities, unless I choose to seek out ones that are on total opposite sides of the city and spend a poop-ton of time to-ing and fro-ing in my car.
Also, every hobby seems to cost money, as does tackling various small (and large) projects around the house so I can't partake in more than one or two. Even if I did, most groups/get-togethers are, like, an hour once a month.
My stepmom said I needed to get a job to make friends. While I agree that you meet people while working, they aren't necessarily friends so I think that's a terrible reason to get a job. I'd rather get a job because I want to work there and not because of just the people. People leave, the job doesn't. So...I'm looking for a part-time that doesn't eat my soul that I will also enjoy while I'm there. I will be working approximately 4-8 hours a weeks soon but that's not for another couple weeks.
Other than a few doc appts, shopping trips, and sleep, I have 400 hours a month to fill.
How did you create your patchwork of things to do after moving to a new town/state? I ask it this way because many people aren't starting from scratch in a new place and not working.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 25, 2022 11:22:28 GMT -5
When I first got here, in 2009, I started volunteering.
Did a few seasonal part time jobs.
Now I have no problems occupying my time. Yes, some of it costs money, but I truly enjoy it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2022 12:26:07 GMT -5
Retired 8 years ago. Volunteering is a biggie for me- no matter what your skills are, someplace can use them. I do a lot for my church and that also gives me a wide circle of "regulars". I do everything from maintaining the web site and doing periodic cleaning of the property to being Vestry Warden (head lay person). They wanted me to be President of the Garden Club this year. I'm glad I turned it down although I'm Treasurer. My house is cleaner and my garden has fewer weeds. I'm probably in better physical shape (adjusted for age ) thanks to video workouts at home, garden work and occasional treadmill workouts. I read more. Public library is excellent and I can download books as well as check out paper copies. There was an excellent community college near our last house and rates for seniors on a space-available basis were really cheap but I'm now out of that county so the rates don't apply and the ones nearby seem focused on business topics. Been there, done that. I want to study fun stuff like hieroglyphics or astronomy. And I waste a lot of time on the Internet! ETA: I spend some of my idle time on e-Rewards, which may not be taking new members, but there are other sites such as Swagbucks. You get brownie points for filling out marketing surveys (some of which are very interesting in themselves although many are tedious). In my case I redeem them for Hilton points, AA miles and Starbucks gift cards. The value per hour spent on surveys is a joke, of course, but I do use those benefits.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Jun 25, 2022 12:57:24 GMT -5
I'm very worried about this too. While I'd love to stop having work stress, what will happen when I quit can seem a little daunting. Most of my social connection drifted into career-related relationships, over the years - we have so much in common! I've looked into joining a country club, although it is pretty pricey and not my usual kind of thing. Thinking of taking up golf, and maybe tennis. Again. Pricey. So that leaves me working until I can comfortably afford that
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nidena
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Post by nidena on Jun 25, 2022 13:01:36 GMT -5
I have considered checking at the Senior's Home near me to see if they need someone to play checkers with residents. (Or something along those lines) I should also share: I'm a few years from 50 so senior-specific stuff doesn't yet apply to me. Nobody has suggested anything along those lines--everything mentioned can be done by any age--but it may change the perspective a bit.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 25, 2022 14:50:59 GMT -5
The volunteering that I did was through a senior agency. I gave it up when my dad was sick and then Covid, so I haven't called to see if they still need volunteers.
I was in my early 60's when I started volunteering. If you like being around older people, it doesn't matter your age.
People living in senior facilities get lonely. Some just want someone to talk to in the guise of playing checkers or doing a puzzle. No one visits them so it does feel good when they tell you that you are the only person who visits and the only person who sends birthday and Christmas cards.
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Happy prose
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Post by Happy prose on Jun 25, 2022 15:32:26 GMT -5
nidena Hopefully at the end of this year, I'll be in the same position as you. I'm retiring, and plan to move about 2 hrs from here, where I won't know anyone. It may be a little easier to meet people, because I'll be in a retirement community. There's a pool, lots if clubs, exercise classes ,etc. I also play with the idea of getting into fostering kittens. It's like having pets without the commitment. I'm not sure though if I would be an instant ‘foster fail’. Best of luck to you, and keep us posted.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 25, 2022 18:13:56 GMT -5
Want to do my work? Organize my house? Scrub my floors? (It's time to scrub my kitchen floor again, sigh). Wash walls? Actually, I'd argue that hobbies don't have to be all that expensive. The St. Vinnies by me has puzzles for $1-2. I would say 85% of the time, all the pieces are there. I just bought a $700+ four harness table loom for $40 at a garage sale a month ago. It's going in my basement for the next phase of my life. I only buy yarn that's cheap. Mostly, because I end up donating 80% of what I make. Usually every year, there's at least one or two old crafty ladies that pass away with a metric crap ton of yarn or stitching supplies that you can snag pretty cheaply at garage sales. I just got a couple skeins of yarn from St. Vinnies for under $1.00, each. Miss R sent me her aunt's crochet hooks for free. I sent a previous poster a box of yarn once...it was completely on me. Crafters are generous people.
A puzzle book (Suduku or whatever) at the grocery store is pretty cheap and should last a while. I think there's literally 3K courses on Coursera. And that's just coursera. There's also edX and Udemy that provide free courses. I would also check out the public school system for volunteering as well. Ours is always desperate for folks to sit and help kids read. Second Harvest food bank is always in need of volunteers. We also have several community gardens that rely on volunteers to grow fresh food for the food pantries. Not to say bingo isn't important. But, I think helping ensure a kid stays at their grade level for reading, especially disadvantaged elementary school kids, is also a worthy cause. In all seriousness, you must know a few things that float your boat, or have a few causes that are near and dear to your heart. Start there. I'm sure there's ways to do what's meaningful to you cheaply.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 25, 2022 18:43:06 GMT -5
Also, geocaching. The app is free. You can look for caches near you so you don't have to drive all over time. ETA: Bird watching/identifying birds by their call. Not my cup of tea. But, it's a thing.
You could even do hand piecing for quilting. You need a ruler, pencil, some cotton shirts (plaids and a solid), thread, scissors, and needles. Shirts and a sheet for the quilt backing can be found at a thrift store. A spool of thread, with some coupons, and needles can be had for cheap from a craft store... You could upgrade and get rotary cutter and mat. But, that's not really a need.
I'm sure there are also classes on how to do photography on your smart phone. That would be a pretty cheap hobby. Adult coloring books.
If you think something like art would flip your lid, I'd keep my eye out for paints, colored pencils that you can use water with, etc at thrift stores. If you have no thrift stores in town, then, that's could be an issue. But even small towns of 3K or so have a thrift store in my state..
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jun 25, 2022 19:42:52 GMT -5
For those working full-time and who are thinking of retiring but are concerned with what to do with yourself once retired, start slow. Go from full-time to part-time if possible. Give yourself some time to adjust to the thought of retiring and no longer having someone else making your time schedule.
Back in 2003 my employer offered an employee buyout to lower and middle management along with exempt salaried employees. The offer was, if qualified, an enhanced traditional pension which you would immediately received even if one was under 60 years old (normal company retirement age and 50vyears of age or older. Or one could take a lump sum payout. Tye offer was made at the end of July and you had to be gone by the end of September. If one was taking the cash, one had to work until the end of Nofember and then gone.
I took the retirement and begin collecting my full, enhanced pension at 53 ONCE I actually retired. In my case though I was asked to work on special HR projects until the end of the company's fiscal year which was May 31, 2004. So I had 8 additional months to get used to the idea I was going to retire after working 30 years for my employer.
Those who had to be gone by September 30, 2003 barely knew what hit them because their retirement was so sudden.
I adjusted very quickly to retirement because I was always a lazy SOB. I will say though I enjoyed the work I did for my employer those 30 years and it was more like being paid to have a hobby.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 25, 2022 20:34:40 GMT -5
I took a buyout, too, so I went from working full time to working zero hours at age 47. Financially smart, no. Mental health smart, ABSOLUTELY, so no regrets.
It took about a year before I had any interest in working. Then I worked part time for the next 30 some years so I could collect my net $91 of Social Security.
I have learned to occupy my time much better than at the beginning, but experience should help with most things.
As for word puzzles, my dad played those several hours a day long before mom died. He kept saying they kept his mind sharp. It probably did help stave off the inevitable.
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nidena
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Post by nidena on Jun 25, 2022 20:42:28 GMT -5
I do have a Logic Puzzle book that has been sitting on my bedside table. I do one every once in awhile. I started knitting a scarf a couple months ago--my first good attempt at knitting--took a pause while I'm getting my office put together. I did find a Unitarian Universalist church a few weeks ago that I've gone to once so far. That was last month. I plan on going again tomorrow. I have no interest in christian churches. I'm not one to view classes on my phone or computer but I am hoping to dive into pursuing an MSA in person at some point...don't want what's left of my GI Bill to go to waste. Great ideas so far though.
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msventoux
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Post by msventoux on Jun 25, 2022 21:40:36 GMT -5
I’m depressingly far away from retirement, but have wondered what I will do. I can see myself volunteering with animal groups. With my background they would probably try to steer me into a treasurer role, but I just want to deal with the animals. A local pot belly pig rescue group is asking people to come out and sit with the pigs to keep them socialized. Frankly I would rather sit in a pasture scratching pigs and reading to them than doing what I do in my career.
I could see myself getting a smaller heeler type dog and getting involved with rally and other dog sports. There’s a bunch of meet up groups that take their (well behaved) dogs on hikes in the area during the week. A book club might be interesting if I could rekindle my love of reading. I would love to take up sketching and art journaling again. I used to enjoy embroidery and cross stitch. I could see myself car camping and going out for a few days traveling locally. I don’t think boredom would be an issue.
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saveinla
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Post by saveinla on Jun 25, 2022 23:16:13 GMT -5
I have been looking at the food bank volunteering opportunities. We have both week days and weekend opportunities across a lot of locations here. We are given 2 full days off for volunteering every year at work and I may be using that later this year when it cools down a bit.
We also have mentoring opportunities with the kids at the downtown schools - a few of my colleagues went to talk to them about jobs that they may have never heard of . They said it was fun to see things click for a few kids that they could learn things they loved and get to a better station in life.
Libraries may also be a great option.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jun 25, 2022 23:46:07 GMT -5
Buy a property with 4 acres, and a house to big, plus rental property. You will not have enough hours in the day.
I cook, clean, sew, raise a garden, can. I've been working on the lawn for 3 days now while my husband is gone.
And I love to read a lot. And have 2 kitties. But not advising this but guardian for my DD and MIL, the paperwork is never ending.
I can't get to all the things I want to do. We also eat out more now covid is over. I was going stir crazy from covid, so this is nice.
There are lots of volunteer activities but I don't have time for those.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2022 7:22:04 GMT -5
I adjusted very quickly to retirement because I was always a lazy SOB. I will say though I enjoyed the work I did for my employer those 30 years and it was more like being paid to have a hobby. One week passed between the Friday I called DH and said, "I think I'm going to quit my job on Monday" and my last day in the office the following Friday. I went home and took a long bike ride. I haven't looked back. It probably helped that DH was already retired so I had company. On knitting, stitching and crochet projects: there are plenty of charities that accept donated hats and blankets so you don't end up with a pile of completed projects. They're all over the internet. I crochet mats from strips of plastic shopping bags that one charity gives to the homeless. People at church donate the bags- some go through an insane amount of them, which is unfortunate, but at least this way I'm keeping them out of trees and rivers.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 26, 2022 8:00:26 GMT -5
On knitting, stitching and crochet projects: there are plenty of charities that accept donated hats and blankets so you don't end up with a pile of completed projects. They're all over the internet. I crochet mats from strips of plastic shopping bags that one charity gives to the homeless. People at church donate the bags- some go through an insane amount of them, which is unfortunate, but at least this way I'm keeping them out of trees and rivers. I would go to ravlery.com to look for charities, besides local places.
I have a package almost ready to go to an Native American reservation.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jun 26, 2022 9:54:56 GMT -5
I adjusted very quickly to retirement because I was always a lazy SOB. I will say though I enjoyed the work I did for my employer those 30 years and it was more like being paid to have a hobby. One week passed between the Friday I called DH and said, "I think I'm going to quit my job on Monday" and my last day in the office the following Friday. I went home and took a long bike ride. I haven't looked back. It probably helped that DH was already retired so I had company. On knitting, stitching and crochet projects: there are plenty of charities that accept donated hats and blankets so you don't end up with a pile of completed projects. They're all over the internet. I crochet mats from strips of plastic shopping bags that one charity gives to the homeless. People at church donate the bags- some go through an insane amount of them, which is unfortunate, but at least this way I'm keeping them out of trees and rivers. I will say my first four years after retiring were busy with my aging parents. One month after retiring I had to fly up to Massachusetts to collect my parents after both suffered health crises. I drove them down to South Carolina where they would be with my brother and his wife. My brother would management the parents' healthcare. After that there were multiple eleven hour drives each way to South Carolina due to the folks' declining health. After my dad passed in 2006 and mom in 2008, no more driving to South Carolina. I was then ready to rest and enjoy retirement. I will say I was lucky in the sense the parents health issues happened after I retired as opposed to happening while I still worked and would have needed to having to ask for excessive time off.
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resolution
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Post by resolution on Jun 26, 2022 11:39:55 GMT -5
I'm not retired, but I spend a lot of time playing an online MMO (multi player online game). Most multiplayer games have communities of people that have text and voice chat, primarly in Discord these days. When I moved across the country, I continued to play my MMO with the same group of friends, so I could still hang out in voice chat with the same people and message them throughout the day.
The main thing is to find a guild or group that is older; my current group that I play and socialize with is mostly people in their 40s to 60s. If you pick a random group it is likely to be a bunch of teenagers who have nothing in common with an adult.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Jun 26, 2022 13:23:10 GMT -5
I am preparing for retirement (5-1-23). I do plan to work part time, but I am collecting notes and websites and names, trying to decide the next chapter in life. I want to write, and keep competing, of course. I want to work at something for the betterment of the planet where I can also use my skills. I would love to work at a soup kitchen, food bank or something food-related that teaches people cooking and shopping skills so they can not just survive, but eat well .
I have mad organizing skills, so maybe something that helps older people downsize when they move -- the sorting, donating, dumping, packing and shipping from one home to the next.
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jerseygirl
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Post by jerseygirl on Jun 26, 2022 13:35:09 GMT -5
I am preparing for retirement (5-1-23). I do plan to work part time, but I am collecting notes and websites and names, trying to decide the next chapter in life. I want to write, and keep competing, of course. I want to work at something for the betterment of the planet where I can also use my skills. I would love to work at a soup kitchen, food bank or something food-related that teaches people cooking and shopping skills so they can not just survive, but eat well .
I have mad organizing skills, so maybe something that helps older people downsize when they move -- the sorting, donating, dumping, packing and shipping from one home to the next.
Friend70 yo hired a woman to help her downsize. She was such a great find, helped friend really decide essentials for new place and sold or donated so much. Most importantly removed so much stress
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 27, 2022 8:02:32 GMT -5
I will say my first four years after retiring were busy with my aging parents. One month after retiring I had to fly up to Massachusetts to collect my parents after both suffered health crises. I drove them down to South Carolina where they would be with my brother and his wife. My brother would management the parents' healthcare. After that there were multiple eleven hour drives each way to South Carolina due to the folks' declining health. After my dad passed in 2006 and mom in 2008, no more driving to South Carolina. I was then ready to rest and enjoy retirement. I will say I was lucky in the sense the parents health issues happened after I retired as opposed to happening while I still worked and would have needed to having to ask for excessive time off. Here's where we are "lucky." My mom won't relinquish control, and I'm not willing to hire a lawyer to declare her incompetent. So. Right now, it's just sitting and watching a bad car crash in slow motion as a bystander. She's less than 2 hours away.
My inlaws live close to us, about 15 minutes away. We planned for DH to say part time, forever, in part so he could start taking care of his parents when the time came. (Well, my folks too, but they wouldn't have any of it. And, I'm really not interested in subject my husband to mom's behavior.) When mom goes, Dh and I will have to go through the house very carefully. She's got stuff stashed all over. And, there still might be things of my dad's that need to be gone through very carefully. (He started mixing things together as a result of treatment.) After that, I think the best course of action is to sell the house to a flipper. I'm not spending a year of my life getting the house ready to sell (and yes, it's going to take that long. Except for the roof and furnace, the last time parts of the house were updated was early 80s. It was built in the 70s).
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 27, 2022 8:08:07 GMT -5
Mom had told us to look carefully through the house for cash. Well, they sold the house. I hope they got all of their cash because we only found $100 in the apartment, along with over $600 in Dairy Queen gift cards.
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nidena
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Post by nidena on Jun 27, 2022 8:48:50 GMT -5
I did manage to watch all of season 18 of Grey's Anatomy this weekend so that took up some time. Today, I may stop by the Community Center in a nearby town--an affluent town--to see if their spring line-up might have a place for my workshops. I may look into other Taskrabbit/Thumbtack opportunities I may provide. I just need to figure out how 1099s work.
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Bonny
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Post by Bonny on Jun 27, 2022 10:01:17 GMT -5
I "retired" in 2003 at about age 42 when we relocated from the Bay Area to the greater Phoenix area.
I'll admit it was a bit of a struggle for a while in terms of creating some structure and purpose for myself. No kids and a working spouse and too young for "senior" activities. After a few months I started volunteering for a local Land Trust (I had previous experience) and then eventually I was leading hikes in our local county park.
We also acquired some out of area rentals including two when my mom passed away in 2008. While I was never really close with my mom I was able to take a few wonderful vacations and be with her after she got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and died 41 days later. Finishing up her estate took quite a bit of time.
We moved again in 2009 and I had to start all over again. This time it was Germany and while the language barrier was challenging, there was a pretty healthy ex-pat community and that helped. I was both taking classes and teaching and that kept me busy. We also did some traveling in Europe that I probably wouldn't have done from the U.S.
We moved again in 2012 this time back to our Bay Area house. It needed a lot of work after being a rental for nine years so the progressive remodels kept me busy. Now I'm back volunteering again, this time for my City. I also have gotten back into backpacking doing some awesome solo hikes in the Sierras.
And I have to say after joining this board in about 2004 have learned so much!
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jun 27, 2022 10:27:00 GMT -5
I will say my first four years after retiring were busy with my aging parents. One month after retiring I had to fly up to Massachusetts to collect my parents after both suffered health crises. I drove them down to South Carolina where they would be with my brother and his wife. My brother would management the parents' healthcare. After that there were multiple eleven hour drives each way to South Carolina due to the folks' declining health. After my dad passed in 2006 and mom in 2008, no more driving to South Carolina. I was then ready to rest and enjoy retirement. I will say I was lucky in the sense the parents health issues happened after I retired as opposed to happening while I still worked and would have needed to having to ask for excessive time off. Here's where we are "lucky." My mom won't relinquish control, and I'm not willing to hire a lawyer to declare her incompetent. So. Right now, it's just sitting and watching a bad car crash in slow motion as a bystander. She's less than 2 hours away.
My inlaws live close to us, about 15 minutes away. We planned for DH to say part time, forever, in part so he could start taking care of his parents when the time came. (Well, my folks too, but they wouldn't have any of it. And, I'm really not interested in subject my husband to mom's behavior.) When mom goes, Dh and I will have to go through the house very carefully. She's got stuff stashed all over. And, there still might be things of my dad's that need to be gone through very carefully. (He started mixing things together as a result of treatment.) After that, I think the best course of action is to sell the house to a flipper. I'm not spending a year of my life getting the house ready to sell (and yes, it's going to take that long. Except for the roof and furnace, the last time parts of the house were updated was early 80s. It was built in the 70s). I get about 15 calls a week regarding selling my home. These are the folks who are buying up hundreds of homes as investments and then renting them out. If the idiots are still buying out homeowners in the future sight unseen and I finally no longer want to be a house/home owner I just may take them up on it. Okay, complaint time. My neighbors across the street from me right now have a SUV with a short circuit problem. They are a same-sex married couple and we get along very well. They took care of me during the February ice storm which caused me to have no electricity (heat) for seven days. Their SUV theft alarm randomly goes off any time day or night for three minutes then shuts itself off. This was caused by a vehicle issue They had and brought it to someone to fix who doesn't have the required skills to fix it. Because the women's master bedroom is in the back of the house they never hear the alarm going off. It's no big deal for me to send them text messages to let them know the alarm is going off. Now here is my complaint: one of the women is a hoarder: a really bad hoarder. The only room in the house not filled to the ceiling with junk is their master bedroom. They even eat their meals in their bedroom. They cannot open they home's back door to the yard as it is completely blocked with junk. Their garage is full. Their two other bedrooms along with the living room where the front door is is full to tye max. Their SUV is full of junk. Now here is the thing: if their living room was free of junk, they could spend their days and evenings in the living room. Bedroom for sleeping only. And if they spent time in a cleared out living room they would hear their SUV theft alarm going off and turning it off until they can get it to an automotive dealership/mechanic to get the problem fixed. I know the junk bothers, big time, the non-hoarder partner. But she just cannot get her partner to see they are in trouble due to the hoarding. Okay. I have had my say.
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on Jun 27, 2022 10:41:15 GMT -5
People living in senior facilities get lonely. Some just want someone to talk to in the guise of playing checkers or doing a puzzle. No one visits them so it does feel good when they tell you that you are the only person who visits and the only person who sends birthday and Christmas cards. You are describing my biggest fear.
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gambler
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Post by gambler on Jun 27, 2022 10:55:08 GMT -5
I joined a gym best thing I did, took up gardening, volunteered at animal shelter and got back to wood woking. Now I cannot figure out how I ever had time to work. I was told to stay busy and I do
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 27, 2022 14:48:56 GMT -5
I have no worries about retirement. I don't think it's possible for me to be bored. I don't remember uttering those words since I was like 10 and my grandma would respond by asking me what being bored was like because she doesn't remember. LOL I've become my grandma I guess. But, living on lots of land that needs to be tended with animals is probably a big part of that. Besides having 1000 things on my list of things that I want or need to do that would last years, I can be perfectly content doing almost nothing as well.
I could see myself volunteering at the Humane Society or taking a PT job doing something fun like feeding the calves at one of the area dairy farms, or maybe even turning part of my barn into a kennel and boarding.
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TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 28,371
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 27, 2022 15:06:51 GMT -5
People living in senior facilities get lonely. Some just want someone to talk to in the guise of playing checkers or doing a puzzle. No one visits them so it does feel good when they tell you that you are the only person who visits and the only person who sends birthday and Christmas cards. You are describing my biggest fear. Mine, too.
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