teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on May 9, 2022 7:50:00 GMT -5
Getting all of us on the same page IS the challenge. We are all so fractured, each focused on fighting different injustices hitting us from all sides. I was watching ABC World News tonight, of course they mentioned it being Mother's day a half dozen times, and it suddenly struck me that it seemed I'd seen only women during the newscast. A woman anchor, woman reporter on the fires in NM, woman reporter on Supreme Court, woman reporter at WH, First Lady met with First Lady of Ukraine, etc. My first thought was, how rude, forcing all those mothers to work on Mother's Day. It's nice that so many women are FINALLY getting roles, sad they are more relegated to the weekend B string staff. But, wow, if American women could organize a Woman's Day Off, ... Or, as another possibility, it was seen as a way to honor women (or perhaps more precisely, working women) by showing that they can perform any and all of the necessary roles without any men involved? Maybe?  This is ALL my speculation, just something that struck me - "hmm, only women seem to be scheduled to work on Mother's Day. What's that all about?" Maybe it's just coincidental. It's Mother's Day, a day to spend with our mothers, turning the tables to treat them for one day to recognize everything they do for us the other 364 days a year. Which is a better look: We've scheduled ALL women for this day's newscast, to highlight what a great job women can do w/o any men here. OR The more senior staff (mostly male) get the weekend off, especially so on major holidays (so they can spend the holiday with their family). This is your chance to show off your stuff, get some airtime, get some experience. Isn't that important enough to reschedule your family plans for a more convenient time? Personally, I prefer the employer that doesn't make you work on an important day (be that Christmas, Labor Day, Mother's Day, your birthday, etc). We trade off, if work has to be open - you have plans thru visit family over Thanksgiving weekend? I can work that odd Saturday because I'm staying local. And you return the favor over Christmas when I have guests staying. I just thought it was odd the men weren't giving the mothers their holiday off. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 8:00:43 GMT -5
At the risk of being too...something...there is no power of the cunny. That is a pleasant little myth that does a wonderful job of denying the reality of the women that are abused and raped for no better reason than to make the point that men have the power and they intend to keep it. Do you think if I refused to have sex with my husband he’d just start raping me instead? That’s a pretty bleak view of men. A talking head this weekend said that if Roe gets overturned, a lot of women will opt to not attend college in states who make abortions illegal. Mississippi just recently announced it was looking into making contraception illegal too. What impact will this have on attendance at Old Miss? Power of the cunny. Do you need to get your husband to change his stand on women's rights? I don't consider university attendance power of the cunny. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 8:11:18 GMT -5
At the risk of being too...something...there is no power of the cunny. That is a pleasant little myth that does a wonderful job of denying the reality of the women that are abused and raped for no better reason than to make the point that men have the power and they intend to keep it. Perhaps the ... something... is narrowly focused. Or perhaps not. But if not, if that is human sexuality, not sure where we can go from there. 2 things: 1. I thought we were focusing on men that deny women's rights. 2. Sexual assault is a big part of human sexuality, unfortunately. |
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teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on May 9, 2022 8:28:21 GMT -5
tallguy it raises an interesting question on how much impact an American Women's Day off would have in today's world. I'm sure many more women are employed now, vs in 1970s Iceland, and in more crucial roles. At the same time, that's pushed at least some fathers into more of the childcare sphere, and hopefully more equal housekeeping duties. So if all women simultaneously took the day off, could men cope? If I'm obsessing over this, it's a bit personal - I'm supposed to be isolating with Covid, leaving DH and DS5 to do stuff rather than me touching stuff and passing it to them. It's fascinating how hard it is for me to hold myself back from doing things, and how reticent they are to take over. I still have to do the mental housework: do we have things we need for meals, what to plan for dinner daily far enough in advance to thaw ingredients, making a grocery list for the coming week, do I need to do laundry today...
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 8:42:03 GMT -5
Perhaps the ... something... is narrowly focused. Or perhaps not. But if not, if that is human sexuality, not sure where we can go from there. 2 things: 1. I thought we were focusing on men that deny women's rights. 2. Sexual assault is a big part of human sexuality, unfortunately. I would like to think that my experience of human sexuality which has not involved any sexual assault is vastly the norm and sexual assault is a small headline grabbing part. Like I said, if I am wrong I have little hope of things improving. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 8:48:07 GMT -5
2 things: 1. I thought we were focusing on men that deny women's rights. 2. Sexual assault is a big part of human sexuality, unfortunately. I would like to think that my experience of human sexuality which has not involved any sexual assault is vastly the norm and sexual assault is a small headline grabbing part. Like I said, if I am wrong I have little hope of things improving. bills I hope you realise I'm not arguing with you, I would love for you to be right about this. But....
In case anyone is wondering, the link to Roe vs Wade is women's rights. I believe the two issues are actually one.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 9:02:21 GMT -5
I would like to think that my experience of human sexuality which has not involved any sexual assault is vastly the norm and sexual assault is a small headline grabbing part. Like I said, if I am wrong I have little hope of things improving. bills I hope you realise I'm not arguing with you, I would love for you to be right about this. But....
In case anyone is wondering, the link to Roe vs Wade is women's rights. I believe the two issues are actually one.
Arguing - no. Discussing - yes. Which is good. I must start my day but will get back into this when I can. |
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hurley1980
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Post by hurley1980 on May 9, 2022 11:42:07 GMT -5
Do you think if I refused to have sex with my husband he’d just start raping me instead? That’s a pretty bleak view of men. A talking head this weekend said that if Roe gets overturned, a lot of women will opt to not attend college in states who make abortions illegal. Mississippi just recently announced it was looking into making contraception illegal too. What impact will this have on attendance at Old Miss? Power of the cunny. Do you need to get your husband to change his stand on women's rights? I don't consider university attendance power of the cunny. Not immediately, but in the long term it could be. If Ol Miss has a ratio of 6 guys for every girl in 10 years, then most guys aren't going to want to attend. College dudes want to get laid. Same with general population. If young women refuse to live in these states, then after a period of time there are going to be more men than women, and most of the women there will be older, or already married. So prospects for relationships and marriage are going to be slim. Its the same reason many young people don't want to live in small towns. They want dating options. These states are going to end up having way more men than women and eventually it won't be desirable to live there for anyone that is single or has a partner of child baring age. But that will be way down the road. |
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on May 9, 2022 11:59:41 GMT -5
Saw a protest sign in an article - "Keep your rosaries off my ovaries".  |
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djAdvocate
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Post by djAdvocate on May 9, 2022 12:18:48 GMT -5
i really don't get why Americans think their healthcare system is so great. everyone i know in the US complains about it. the latest example is one of my employees who is retiring and moving to Idaho. as a self employed person his cost per month for a family of three will be $2000, and it has taken him at least 40 hours of his time to set that up (and it is STILL not done, with 26 days to go). contrast this to Costa Rica. for an expat to buy into that system, it is $73/month, the last time i checked. yes, you read that right. I have never been there wouldn't mind visiting. My brother in law tells quite a different story. He came here 15 years ago and goes back to see / help his mom. He said the healthcare sucks you have cheap healthcare but diagnosis and quality of treatment is poor. Seeing a specialist is hard you will get an appt for months away only to have it rescheduled again and again. Why? it is corrupt if you have money you are moved to the head of the line. Cash is king. I have herd the same about Canada but to be honest when I travelled there is didn't see any of that. I am inclined to believe my brother in law. not according to the WHO. so i guess you have to decide who you trust more. a global body that is there specifically to analyze the relative merits of international health systems, or your BIL. seeing a specialist is super easy, btw. you just need to use the private system. that goes for any country. and those private systems are universally cheaper than the US and just as good in many places, including Costa Rica. if you are curious, i can start a thread and provide links. i am SUPER interested in this subject, because i have watched as FIL and my dad were effectively bankrupted by our healthcare system, destroying their retirement and estate(s). i vowed to not allow that to happen to me. i find it discouraging when people think that the US is the greatest healthcare system on Earth. there is literally NO support for that argument. zero. it is ranked, at best, 10th in some surveys. the WHO has it, Canada, and Costa Rica all in the mid-30's. i see no reason to doubt the WHO, based on my own observations and research. |
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pulmonarymd
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Post by pulmonarymd on May 9, 2022 12:41:07 GMT -5
I suspect scgal is from South Carolina Life expectancy rank in US #41 Median income %41 Education rank %43 That utopia, South Carolina. The idea that SC can look down on anyone is laughable Ahhh yes utopia it is nice Being sicker, poorer, and dumber makes a place utopia. Who knew? I prefer a place that cares about the well being of its people. But you do you. |
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kadee79
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Post by kadee79 on May 9, 2022 13:04:22 GMT -5
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kadee79
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Post by kadee79 on May 9, 2022 13:06:08 GMT -5
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on May 9, 2022 14:23:10 GMT -5
2 things: 1. I thought we were focusing on men that deny women's rights. 2. Sexual assault is a big part of human sexuality, unfortunately. I would like to think that my experience of human sexuality which has not involved any sexual assault is vastly the norm and sexual assault is a small headline grabbing part. Like I said, if I am wrong I have little hope of things improving. Your experience is that of a man. I have been assaulted more than once, (granted, I was a wild teen with no supervision and a penchant for alcohol which got me into bad situations ). My older brother is a result of my mom being raped by a sick, stalker, psychopath. Her sisters actually hid her away until after the baby was born and he was never made aware the child existed or was put up for adoption. |
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 15:03:33 GMT -5
I would like to think that my experience of human sexuality which has not involved any sexual assault is vastly the norm and sexual assault is a small headline grabbing part. Like I said, if I am wrong I have little hope of things improving. Your experience is that of a man. I have been assaulted more than once, (granted, I was a wild teen with no supervision and a penchant for alcohol which got me into bad situations ). My older brother is a result of my mom being raped by a sick, stalker, psychopath. Her sisters actually hid her away until after the baby was born and he was never made aware the child existed or was put up for adoption. My experience is as a man with women. |
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on May 9, 2022 15:28:56 GMT -5
Your experience is that of a man. I have been assaulted more than once, (granted, I was a wild teen with no supervision and a penchant for alcohol which got me into bad situations ). My older brother is a result of my mom being raped by a sick, stalker, psychopath. Her sisters actually hid her away until after the baby was born and he was never made aware the child existed or was put up for adoption. My experience is as a man with women. You're missing the point. Just because you personally have never assaulted a woman doesn't change the fact that a lot of women are assaulted by men. It's not nearly as common to happen the other way around.
And I think my experience is the norm. That high school girls crashing college parties and drinking too much are often hauled off to back rooms and groped or worse, that sometimes "payment" is required to get returned home rather than walking 15 miles from some backcountry road in the middle of the night (or in my case from an airstrip god knows where in the middle of corn fields in a rural area).
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djAdvocate
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Post by djAdvocate on May 9, 2022 16:48:54 GMT -5
of course it is. this is about returning us to 1960. you remember? America was just so fucking great back then. for women. and blacks. and everyone except us white guys. right. |
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djAdvocate
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Post by djAdvocate on May 9, 2022 16:52:51 GMT -5
My experience is as a man with women. You're missing the point. Just because you personally have never assaulted a woman doesn't change the fact that a lot of women are assaulted by men. It's not nearly as common to happen the other way around.
And I think my experience is the norm. That high school girls crashing college parties and drinking too much are often hauled off to back rooms and groped or worse, that sometimes "payment" is required to get returned home rather than walking 15 miles from some backcountry road in the middle of the night (or in my case from an airstrip god knows where in the middle of corn fields in a rural area).
i remember studying this before i began work for a women's center in my home town. something UPWARDS of 90% of women have been sexually harassed during their lives. the numbers are also quite high for assault and rape. women do shit like never walking alone, and carrying their keys between their house and their car in their hands, and keeping mace in their purse. how many men do that? none. men travel alone abroad. they drink alone in bars late at night. they are often out by themselves without the protection of more than their skin and clothes. women would never dream of that- at least most wouldn't. especially in cities and poor areas. the fact that men don't live that life doesn't invalidate that life. wokeness validates that life. |
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hurley1980
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Post by hurley1980 on May 9, 2022 17:51:03 GMT -5
You're missing the point. Just because you personally have never assaulted a woman doesn't change the fact that a lot of women are assaulted by men. It's not nearly as common to happen the other way around.
And I think my experience is the norm. That high school girls crashing college parties and drinking too much are often hauled off to back rooms and groped or worse, that sometimes "payment" is required to get returned home rather than walking 15 miles from some backcountry road in the middle of the night (or in my case from an airstrip god knows where in the middle of corn fields in a rural area).
i remember studying this before i began work for a women's center in my home town. something UPWARDS of 90% of women have been sexually harassed during their lives. the numbers are also quite high for assault and rape. women do shit like never walking alone, and carrying their keys between their house and their car in their hands, and keeping mace in their purse. how many men do that? none.men travel alone abroad. they drink alone in bars late at night. they are often out by themselves without the protection of more than their skin and clothes. women would never dream of that- at least most wouldn't. especially in cities and poor areas. the fact that men don't live that life doesn't invalidate that life. wokeness validates that life. I have mace and a taser, and have threatened to use them more than once. Unfortunately, I didn't get them until after I had already been assaulted. Also, I can name 2 times that I remember, being assaulted as a child on the playground, before I was even a teen. The first time was in 3rd grade, when a boy and his group of friends held me down and took turns kissing me. But this was in the 80s when "boys will be boys" was prevalent so nothing ever happened. You would be surprised how many people don't think unwanted kissing is assault, but it had a VERY lasting impact on my youth. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 18:24:11 GMT -5
Do you need to get your husband to change his stand on women's rights? I don't consider university attendance power of the cunny. Not immediately, but in the long term it could be. If Ol Miss has a ratio of 6 guys for every girl in 10 years, then most guys aren't going to want to attend. College dudes want to get laid. Same with general population. If young women refuse to live in these states, then after a period of time there are going to be more men than women, and most of the women there will be older, or already married. So prospects for relationships and marriage are going to be slim. Its the same reason many young people don't want to live in small towns. They want dating options. These states are going to end up having way more men than women and eventually it won't be desirable to live there for anyone that is single or has a partner of child baring age. But that will be way down the road. If that is true why did women have to fight so hard to be allowed to attend university? |
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on May 9, 2022 18:28:58 GMT -5
they drink alone in bars late at night. they are often out by themselves without the protection of more than their skin and clothes. women would never dream of that- at least most wouldn't. especially in cities and poor areas.
I always do that. I have no problem going to the Balattou or the Jazz Fest, then wandering home alone late at night. I live in a big city.
Have I been sexually assaulted? You bet! However, it was someone I knew, who broke into my house. Sexual harrassmet was always in the workplace.
Sexual assault by strangers doesn't happen that often...at least not here.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on May 9, 2022 18:42:24 GMT -5
I would like to think that my experience of human sexuality which has not involved any sexual assault is vastly the norm and sexual assault is a small headline grabbing part. Like I said, if I am wrong I have little hope of things improving. Your experience is that of a man. I have been assaulted more than once, (granted, I was a wild teen with no supervision and a penchant for alcohol which got me into bad situations ). My older brother is a result of my mom being raped by a sick, stalker, psychopath. Her sisters actually hid her away until after the baby was born and he was never made aware the child existed or was put up for adoption. Your poor mother. And sorry to read about your experience.  |
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kadee79
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Post by kadee79 on May 9, 2022 19:18:11 GMT -5
And I was sexually assualted by strangers twice before I was 12!
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 20:53:08 GMT -5
Perhaps the ... something... is narrowly focused. Or perhaps not. But if not, if that is human sexuality, not sure where we can go from there. 2 things: 1. I thought we were focusing on men that deny women's rights. 2. Sexual assault is a big part of human sexuality, unfortunately. Wanted to go back to this comment, "... big part ..." Of the sum total of sexual interactions, how many are consensual and how many are assault? What would those percentages be? I know that I and every woman every time I was with them can put ours in the consensual column. If everyone did that accounting, what would the numbers look like in total? Might it be 50/50? 75/25 one direction or the other? 90/10? Even more skewed? What is it for you? Assault is horrifyingly memorable and impactful. Consensual is great or okay or boring. I can't truly count the times I have had consensual sex. It blurs. But I would think assault is different. I think it is a small part of human sexuality that has an impact beyond that size. There is work to be done to make the world safer for women. I am just suggesting that we do have a stronger base from which to build than we might think. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 21:27:01 GMT -5
2 things: 1. I thought we were focusing on men that deny women's rights. 2. Sexual assault is a big part of human sexuality, unfortunately. Wanted to go back to this comment, "... big part ..." Of the sum total of sexual interactions, how many are consensual and how many are assault? What would those percentages be? I know that I and every woman every time I was with them can put ours in the consensual column. If everyone did that accounting, what would the numbers look like in total? Might it be 50/50? 75/25 one direction or the other? 90/10? Even more skewed? What is it for you? Assault is horrifyingly memorable and impactful. Consensual is great or okay or boring. I can't truly count the times I have had consensual sex. It blurs. But I would think assault is different. I think it is a small part of human sexuality that has an impact beyond that size. There is work to be done to make the world safer for women. I am just suggesting that we do have a stronger base from which to build than we might think. You have to remember that we started this part of the conversation when someone said this could all be solved if women just withheld sex until we got our own way. They even had a cute name for it. My point is that women do not now and never have had the power to rule the world by withholding sex as they have never had total control over their own sexuality. Not having the right to have an abortion on demand is another way this plays out. And bill you don't know what impact this has had on your own sex life. You don't really know if any of your partners had sex on any particular occasion or occasions because they felt they had to for some reason (they led you on and weren't allowed to change their mind, they had said yes before so they always had to agree) I'm not trying to depress you, but the number of times sexual assault happens (and it happens a lot) is just the tip of the ice berg on it's impact. |
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 21:34:23 GMT -5
Wanted to go back to this comment, "... big part ..." Of the sum total of sexual interactions, how many are consensual and how many are assault? What would those percentages be? I know that I and every woman every time I was with them can put ours in the consensual column. If everyone did that accounting, what would the numbers look like in total? Might it be 50/50? 75/25 one direction or the other? 90/10? Even more skewed? What is it for you? Assault is horrifyingly memorable and impactful. Consensual is great or okay or boring. I can't truly count the times I have had consensual sex. It blurs. But I would think assault is different. I think it is a small part of human sexuality that has an impact beyond that size. There is work to be done to make the world safer for women. I am just suggesting that we do have a stronger base from which to build than we might think. You have to remember that we started this part of the conversation when someone said this could all be solved if women just withheld sex until we got our own way. They even had a cute name for it. My point is that women do not now and never have had the power to rule the world by withholding sex as they have never had total control over their own sexuality. Not having the right to have an abortion on demand is another way this plays out. Not sure why I have to remember that to address the claim you made. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 21:37:28 GMT -5
You have to remember that we started this part of the conversation when someone said this could all be solved if women just withheld sex until we got our own way. They even had a cute name for it. My point is that women do not now and never have had the power to rule the world by withholding sex as they have never had total control over their own sexuality. Not having the right to have an abortion on demand is another way this plays out. Not sure why I have to remember that to address the claim you made. Sorry I added to my answer after you quoted it. And you need to remember it because we are discussing using sex to assert power. Women can't do that successfully. |
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 21:50:39 GMT -5
Wanted to go back to this comment, "... big part ..." Of the sum total of sexual interactions, how many are consensual and how many are assault? What would those percentages be? I know that I and every woman every time I was with them can put ours in the consensual column. If everyone did that accounting, what would the numbers look like in total? Might it be 50/50? 75/25 one direction or the other? 90/10? Even more skewed? What is it for you? Assault is horrifyingly memorable and impactful. Consensual is great or okay or boring. I can't truly count the times I have had consensual sex. It blurs. But I would think assault is different. I think it is a small part of human sexuality that has an impact beyond that size. There is work to be done to make the world safer for women. I am just suggesting that we do have a stronger base from which to build than we might think. You have to remember that we started this part of the conversation when someone said this could all be solved if women just withheld sex until we got our own way. They even had a cute name for it. My point is that women do not now and never have had the power to rule the world by withholding sex as they have never had total control over their own sexuality. Not having the right to have an abortion on demand is another way this plays out. And bill you don't know what impact this has had on your own sex life. You don't really know if any of your partners had sex on any particular occasion or occasions because they felt they had to for some reason (they led you on and weren't allowed to change their mind, they had said yes before so they always had to agree) I'm not trying to depress you, but the number of times sexual assault happens (and it happens a lot) is just the tip of the ice berg on it's impact. If women are that fucked up in their sexuality, nothing we guys with no ill intent can do. Oh well. |
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on May 9, 2022 21:54:02 GMT -5
You have to remember that we started this part of the conversation when someone said this could all be solved if women just withheld sex until we got our own way. They even had a cute name for it. My point is that women do not now and never have had the power to rule the world by withholding sex as they have never had total control over their own sexuality. Not having the right to have an abortion on demand is another way this plays out. And bill you don't know what impact this has had on your own sex life. You don't really know if any of your partners had sex on any particular occasion or occasions because they felt they had to for some reason (they led you on and weren't allowed to change their mind, they had said yes before so they always had to agree) I'm not trying to depress you, but the number of times sexual assault happens (and it happens a lot) is just the tip of the ice berg on it's impact. If women are that fucked up in their sexuality, nothing we guys with no ill intent can do. Oh well. You can fight to have men held accountable for sexual assault and for women to have the right to abortion. |
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Post by billisonboard on May 9, 2022 21:56:57 GMT -5
Wanted to go back to this comment, "... big part ..." Of the sum total of sexual interactions, how many are consensual and how many are assault? What would those percentages be? I know that I and every woman every time I was with them can put ours in the consensual column. If everyone did that accounting, what would the numbers look like in total? Might it be 50/50? 75/25 one direction or the other? 90/10? Even more skewed? What is it for you? It doesn't really work that way though. I have consensual sex all the time with my husband. I love having sex with him. It doesn't stop me from viewing any man that I don't know with suspicion if there is no one else around besides me and him. It isn't the total number of times that you have sex that creates some percentage of consensual vs. nonconsensual, its that every man that I don't know is a potential threat if there is no one else around. So how you view men is what determines how much sexual assault takes place in the world. And we are all potential threats so we assault you by existing. |
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