raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jan 7, 2023 20:02:55 GMT -5
Dinner was leftovers from lunch and we'll probably crash early again due to the allergy fog. DH watched The Woman King and said it was really good. Mister and I watched The Woman King a couple of weeks ago, and while I love Viola Davis, the movie was just ok to me. We’ve been waiting to be able to watch Wakanda Forever at home, but last time we checked, it still wasn’t available yet, even if we paid for it. We took DGS to the movies to see Black Panther when it first came out, and I’ve happily watched it a couple of times since then. I want to see Wakanda Forever, but not bad enough to go sit in a theater. Black Panther was pre-COVID, when we went to the movies to watch it. I have a short attention span when it comes to movies, so there aren’t many I’ll willingly watch more than once. I do good if I manage to watch a whole movie the first time. One of the fairly recent ones that I’ll happily watch again is The Harder They Fall. I’ve watched it twice already and the past couple of days, I’ve been kind of wanting to watch it again. Idk why, but I really liked that movie, and that’s saying something for me, I fall asleep during a lot of movies lol. Mister hates that. Mister bought The Bullet Train for us to watch a couple weeks ago, it’s free now on Netflix or somewhere. I did manage to watch the whole movie, but it mostly kept my interest because it was kind of crazy lol. I’m okay with not watching it again, ever. I think it's 2/1 that it'll be available on Disney Plus.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 7, 2023 20:44:03 GMT -5
Going to bed now, early but that's okay
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cooper88
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Post by cooper88 on Jan 7, 2023 20:50:47 GMT -5
I'll probably get to bed early also. I've been out in the yard today digging. Clearly I haven't used those particular muscles for a while and I'll feel it even more in the morning. Going to grill steaks and chill for the rest of the evening.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Jan 7, 2023 20:58:29 GMT -5
Eating peanut M&Ms that YDB gave me for Christmas, a half gallon container of them. And enjoying this, one of the last days of Christmas lights in our house. I think I'll put away the tree and wreath on Monday. Reading NYTimes headlines and purging old email.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jan 7, 2023 20:59:42 GMT -5
Mister and I watched The Woman King a couple of weeks ago, and while I love Viola Davis, the movie was just ok to me. We’ve been waiting to be able to watch Wakanda Forever at home, but last time we checked, it still wasn’t available yet, even if we paid for it. We took DGS to the movies to see Black Panther when it first came out, and I’ve happily watched it a couple of times since then. I want to see Wakanda Forever, but not bad enough to go sit in a theater. Black Panther was pre-COVID, when we went to the movies to watch it. I have a short attention span when it comes to movies, so there aren’t many I’ll willingly watch more than once. I do good if I manage to watch a whole movie the first time. One of the fairly recent ones that I’ll happily watch again is The Harder They Fall. I’ve watched it twice already and the past couple of days, I’ve been kind of wanting to watch it again. Idk why, but I really liked that movie, and that’s saying something for me, I fall asleep during a lot of movies lol. Mister hates that. Mister bought The Bullet Train for us to watch a couple weeks ago, it’s free now on Netflix or somewhere. I did manage to watch the whole movie, but it mostly kept my interest because it was kind of crazy lol. I’m okay with not watching it again, ever. I think it's 2/1 that it'll be available on Disney Plus. Thanks for the info. I should probably be embarrassed to admit it, but idk how to work anything on our tv’s besides Xfinity and Netflix. Mister has Apple TV and who knows what else on our tv’s, and I have no idea how to use or navigate any of it. My excuse is that I don’t really watch tv or movies, so I’m not motivated to learn. As long as I can turn HGTV on to watch or for background noise, I’m good lol. A few days ago, when I let the dogs outside, I realized that Mister’s Dad had the outdoor speakers playing whatever he was watching on tv. I have trouble getting music to play out there when I want it to, and more often than not, I have to ask Mister for help. Mister is a musician and an audiophile, so we have a fancy dancy audio setup with expensive speakers and accessories for movies and music, and different zones (rooms, indoor and outdoor) and just a bunch of shit that I can’t make sense out of and don’t really want to learn. I know how to make music play on the fancy speakers in the den, and if I’m lucky, outside while I sit on the deck. I know how to make the Home Pods play music in our kitchen and bedroom. That’s it, and that’s pretty much all I’m interested in. I had no idea how to turn the outdoor speakers off that day and didn’t know how his Dad even got ahold of that remote, because he was constantly doing weird shit with the tv and asking me to fix it, so I’d hid all the remotes except the one that works the tv, cable and basic audio. Whenever he had some strange shit on the tv screen, all I knew to do was turn everything off and turn it back on and see if that worked lol. That’s why I hid all the other remote controls from him. Anyway, when he had the outdoor speakers playing what he was watching on tv, I had to call Mister and ask him how to turn them off. Mister said he hasn’t even been able to figure out how to make that to happen even though he knew it was possible and has tried (getting the audio from the tv to play outside), and he had to walk me through trying to make it stop. So I will tell Mister that it’s supposed to be a available on 2/1 on Disney Plus and let him deal with the rest so we can watch it. All the streaming and stuff is too complicated for me to figure out, especially since I’m not big on watching tv and movies.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Jan 7, 2023 21:28:41 GMT -5
bean29 which book did you look up? I don’t think either of them have anything to do with alcoholism. The Body Keeps Score is about how our brain and body hold on to trauma. The other one is about how our behavior can keep us from experiencing joy, or something like that. I looked it up in the kindle store. It says 1 in 5 Americans have been molested, one in four grew up with alcoholics, one in three couples have engaged in physical violence (wow, is it just me or does that # seem high?) If I was at a computer I would link the whole book description-I tried to screen shot it, but my phone is not locating the screenshot file. Maybe I will try to borrow the MP3 audible version from the library.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jan 7, 2023 21:32:55 GMT -5
bean29 which book did you look up? I don’t think either of them have anything to do with alcoholism. The Body Keeps Score is about how our brain and body hold on to trauma. The other one is about how our behavior can keep us from experiencing joy, or something like that. I looked it up in the kindle store. It says 1 in 5 Americans have been molested, one in four grew up with alcoholics, one in three couples have engaged in physical violence (wow, is it just me or does that # seem high?)[\b]
If I was at a computer I would link the whole book description-I tried to screen shot it, but my phone is not locating the screenshot file.
Maybe I will try to borrow the MP3 audible version from the library.It’s not just you. That number seems high to me.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jan 7, 2023 21:48:11 GMT -5
Having fun with my dead people today. Booked hotel for a trip back to Ohio where the family is buried. I don't think I can find the cemetery on private property but there is another larger cemetery that is still used for burials today. I'm finding more places to go and I found my aunt's photos of our 5th great grandfather's house in that town. She wrote directions on the back of it so I shall see if I can find it. I knew she was my favorite aunt for a reason.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jan 7, 2023 21:49:31 GMT -5
I looked it up in the kindle store. It says 1 in 5 Americans have been molested, one in four grew up with alcoholics, one in three couples have engaged in physical violence (wow, is it just me or does that # seem high?)[\b]
If I was at a computer I would link the whole book description-I tried to screen shot it, but my phone is not locating the screenshot file.
Maybe I will try to borrow the MP3 audible version from the library.It’s not just you. That number seems high to me. google tells me that domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behavior that can be physical, emotional or sexual. So in Australia, 23% of women experience emotional abuse. 16% men. While I would assume some overlap, I could see how he numbers could get to one in three. Look at my family on my mom's side..all emotionally abusive...My mom's parents, my parents, and well, I was pretty abusive too, in the beginning of our marriage. That's 3 for 3.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jan 7, 2023 22:01:43 GMT -5
My "dry January" online detox starts tomorrow. I imagine it will be brutal, but needed. I hope it goes well.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jan 7, 2023 22:05:41 GMT -5
bean29 which book did you look up? I don’t think either of them have anything to do with alcoholism. The Body Keeps Score is about how our brain and body hold on to trauma. The other one is about how our behavior can keep us from experiencing joy, or something like that. I looked it up in the kindle store. It says 1 in 5 Americans have been molested, one in four grew up with alcoholics, one in three couples have engaged in physical violence (wow, is it just me or does that # seem high?) If I was at a computer I would link the whole book description-I tried to screen shot it, but my phone is not locating the screenshot file. Maybe I will try to borrow the MP3 audible version from the library. You don’t have to go through the trouble of trying to link the description, I believe you. I keep having to take breaks from reading it, but so far, what I’ve read talks about veterans with PTSD and people that have been abused as children. I also saw the statistics about couples and physical violence, but what struck me even more was the mention of how many people have been the victims of sexual abuse as children. The author seemed to be shocked by that initially, but I was not. I was sexually abused as a child, and as an adult, I had a conversation with a couple of police officers that I will never forget. The first one I was talking to, shared how he was so shocked that when just talking to people in the communities he worked in, he learned that there are SO many women with a story to tell about having been sexually abused. His partner walked up while we were talking, and he agreed with his partner about being surprised about the stories so many women told him about having been sexually abused. That’s not to say it doesn’t happen to boys and males too, because it absolutely does, and I know that. I’m just sharing what those police officers talked about that day during our conversation. Maybe I just haven’t gotten to the parts about alcoholics. Because like I said, I’ve had to read the book in small doses. I’ve always thought that despite what happened to me as a child, I’m okay, because even then I knew that the evil had nothing to do with me and everything to do with the person doing it to me. But now I realize that maybe I’m really not okay, since I keep going through periods in my life when I really struggle to just keep going and trying to be okay. I’ve always thought that my ability to put things in a “box” inside my mind and not think about them helped me, but now I’m not so sure. I’ve read before that “what we resist, persists”, so maybe in order for me to really to be okay I have to unpack all those boxes of hurtful things and deal with them. I really don’t know. But I do know that the way I deal with hurtful things, by tucking them away in boxes in the corners of my mind, and numbing myself to the pain, also means I numb myself to the joys of life. I am so out of touch with my emotions that most of the time, I don’t even know what I’m feeling. Unless it’s anger. I am comfortable with negative emotions like anger and can identify them, and at the same time, I am very afraid of my own anger, afraid of what I might do when I’m angry. That is why I try so hard to be peaceful, for fear I will lose it and cause great harm and wreck my life if I allow myself to be angry, even when it is justified to feel that way. When I was going to a psychologist for counseling years ago, she said that I was one of the most self controlled patients she’d had, but that was because I am legit afraid of my own anger, and unfortunately, she never helped me sort that out over the couple of years I saw her every week. And I know that I am beyond tired. Mentally and physically. I apologize for writing about something so heavy in this thread.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jan 7, 2023 22:27:11 GMT -5
Going to bed now, early but that's okay My 15 year old went to bed at 9.
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Jan 8, 2023 0:46:08 GMT -5
Dinner was leftovers from lunch and we'll probably crash early again due to the allergy fog. DH watched The Woman King and said it was really good. Mister and I watched The Woman King a couple of weeks ago, and while I love Viola Davis, the movie was just ok to me. We’ve been waiting to be able to watch Wakanda Forever at home, but last time we checked, it still wasn’t available yet, even if we paid for it. We took DGS to the movies to see Black Panther when it first came out, and I’ve happily watched it a couple of times since then. I want to see Wakanda Forever, but not bad enough to go sit in a theater. Black Panther was pre-COVID, when we went to the movies to watch it. I have a short attention span when it comes to movies, so there aren’t many I’ll willingly watch more than once. I do good if I manage to watch a whole movie the first time. One of the fairly recent ones that I’ll happily watch again is The Harder They Fall. I’ve watched it twice already and the past couple of days, I’ve been kind of wanting to watch it again. Idk why, but I really liked that movie, and that’s saying something for me, I fall asleep during a lot of movies lol. Mister hates that. Mister bought The Bullet Train for us to watch a couple weeks ago, it’s free now on Netflix or somewhere. I did manage to watch the whole movie, but it mostly kept my interest because it was kind of crazy lol. I’m okay with not watching it again, ever. The Woman King? That sounds really awkward. Why didn't they just call it 'The Queen"? I had The Suicide Squad on TV for background noisse while I was making a stir-fry.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jan 8, 2023 1:05:25 GMT -5
I am cooling the ham broth I made. Strained it and dumped the meat scraps outside. I than boiled it down more. Once it's cool I will skim off the fat and have some concentrated broth to add to a pot of beans. Will likely freeze it.
I've been so bored today, that's just not good. Some of it must be the winter weather I guess.
Hubs has the wall up on one end and the doorways framed. He has drywall half way across, I'm sure he will finish drywalling that tomorrow. He said he isn't going to cut out the wall for the bathroom yet in case he doesn't get to it for awhile. He said no point having 2 doors go into the same area right now. He's right, a lot more to do down there first. Dropped ceiling to put in, the side wall to insulate and run wire than drywall, the other end to enclose. And since it's 9 ft ceilings down there too, he has to piece the drywall. The sheets longer than 8 ft are too hard for one person to handle.
I think tomorrow I will finally be in the mood to dust, have to force myself but it definitely needs done, especially DD's room. Need to clean kitties room and clean the litter boxes too. More old routine, same old same old work, sigh.
But looking forward to have t bone steaks tomorrow night with baked potatoes, and maybe baked beans or some type of salad. Also going to sautee mushrooms to go with the steaks. Likely will cook the steaks on the grill, they taste much better.
I'm watching the old Angel series, I've watched it before but still like it. Also like Buffy the vampire slayer, both are silly, but sheer fantasy is enjoyable at times.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Jan 8, 2023 6:00:22 GMT -5
Good morning, introspective invisipeeps, sharing your wisdom with Y Ma'am. Welcome to Sunday, the start of the second week of 2023. I hope this day shines some light in the dark corners and offers to you some tasty hot (or cold!) beverages. We will see if we get to church this morning. It's just 3 blocks away and is wonderful. They are still offering services via Zoom, so it's tempting to just watch from here, even though going is a good experience. I'm not surprised at the statistics regarding experience of abuse. My XH was abusive, increasingly so over the years. One of the milder things he did early in our marriage was to not talk to me for an entire month. He just didn't respond to me at all, nor say anything himself. When he did start talking again he never explained it. I'm still reeling from the raw cruelty he showed. Why I stayed, I could not say, now that I'm older. I'm sure emotional abuse and physical abuse are twinned. So many people lack the ability to truly connect with another person or even manage their own emotions. Abuse is a resulting default. Yesterday we did get sun for a short while in the dawn, enough for me to take some good shots. If you're on FB you saw a different picture yesterday than this one. I couldn't decide which to post.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 8, 2023 8:39:27 GMT -5
No apologies needed Pink Cashmere. You are speaking honestly about an all-too-common experience in our nation and others. And every incident leaves scars, unseen and festering for a lifetime if not addressed. I so respect you for looking honestly at your life and trying to figure stuff out.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 8, 2023 8:42:03 GMT -5
Mister and I watched The Woman King a couple of weeks ago, and while I love Viola Davis, the movie was just ok to me. We’ve been waiting to be able to watch Wakanda Forever at home, but last time we checked, it still wasn’t available yet, even if we paid for it. We took DGS to the movies to see Black Panther when it first came out, and I’ve happily watched it a couple of times since then. I want to see Wakanda Forever, but not bad enough to go sit in a theater. Black Panther was pre-COVID, when we went to the movies to watch it. I have a short attention span when it comes to movies, so there aren’t many I’ll willingly watch more than once. I do good if I manage to watch a whole movie the first time. One of the fairly recent ones that I’ll happily watch again is The Harder They Fall. I’ve watched it twice already and the past couple of days, I’ve been kind of wanting to watch it again. Idk why, but I really liked that movie, and that’s saying something for me, I fall asleep during a lot of movies lol. Mister hates that. Mister bought The Bullet Train for us to watch a couple weeks ago, it’s free now on Netflix or somewhere. I did manage to watch the whole movie, but it mostly kept my interest because it was kind of crazy lol. I’m okay with not watching it again, ever. The Woman King? That sounds really awkward. Why didn't they just call it 'The Queen"?I had The Suicide Squad on TV for background noisse while I was making a stir-fry. I didn't watch it so I don't know the story. DH said it was based in part on an historical event. Some nations or peoples did not have a separate gender-based term for a female supreme leader so maybe "King" was a generic term
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jan 8, 2023 9:36:44 GMT -5
I am farting around. I should be productive.
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Jan 8, 2023 9:57:18 GMT -5
likewise, esp since I'm not sitting here with the newspaper. shocker, I didn't get one today. but I'm on a group chat with cruise friends from this general area, and we're talking about excursions in 2w.
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jan 8, 2023 10:12:15 GMT -5
Just rolled out of bed and am psyching myself up to go out and do chores. The animals hate me on the weekends because I'm always late with their breakfast.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 8, 2023 10:18:43 GMT -5
Globetrotters were great. Glad I sprung for great seats in my Christmas spending spree. Dd14 was supposed to go with us but she had a theater even overlap so we took dd10s friend. It's definitely starting that dd14 is having her own life, bittersweet. But I'm trying to counter balance it with diving in deeper with dd10s friend group. This friend is the middle of 5 and super sweet, quiet, studious and funny. So it's nice being able to provide her with experiences. Dh and I both recognize that friends families did some of that for us growing up so it's special paying it fwd.
I was able to talk to her mom for over an hour during break and we parent pretty similarly. I also was straightforward that we don't keep score on sleepovers, hosting, etc. She has an 18 month old so it's nowhere near a level playing field LOL. I could tell she was relieved to have that out there and I'd been worried she was going to start turning down invites since it is lopsided. Glad I spoke up and it was well received.
Girls can home from the game and were in bed by 1030 which is perfect bc my rule is I'll host sleepovers way more often if they don't stay up stupid late and make everyone miserable the next day.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 8, 2023 10:22:52 GMT -5
Pink - I think you're onto something in your self discovery journey. I'm an expert stuffer too and it's caught up with me a couple of times in terms of physical symptoms- back problems, insomnia, panic attacks. It's like your physical body can call attention to the unresolved emotional trauma. Therapy has been so important for me along with reading and some good podcasts - mayim bialik and glennon doyle.
Plus I have the extra incentive of figuring my shit out bc both dds have way too much of my gene pool in the mental/emotional aspects. Sometimes it's like parenting myself. And I want to lead by example in how I take care of myself so I'm not hiding my struggles anymore but sharing them as time and age allows.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jan 8, 2023 10:30:08 GMT -5
Gearing up to work again. I really wish we got the opportunity to get pay outs for used vacation.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Jan 8, 2023 10:36:42 GMT -5
Docked in LA right now and we have this big assed container ship off our balcony. Those suckers are huge!
Informed last night we are not stopping in Santa Barbara tomorrow. I guess the weather is supposed to be a big mess and there are evacuations planned for possible landslides. It’s a tendering port and that makes it more difficult too, but we had planned on meeting up with another friend we haven’t seen in years.
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jerseygirl
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Post by jerseygirl on Jan 8, 2023 10:39:49 GMT -5
Jerseyguy finally homeYAY But having frustrations about the lines going to oxygen concentrator and himself. Connecting the 2 hoses is a little straight plastic tube and super hard to get off old hose to put into new. Poured boiling water to soften - burnt my fingers. Used knife to cut off - cut my finger. Swearing helped minimally. Finally got it done. My BP must be up but sitting here typing helps.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jan 8, 2023 10:48:13 GMT -5
Just rolled out of bed and am psyching myself up to go out and do chores. The animals hate me on the weekends because I'm always late with their breakfast. I do that too with Moon Shadow, but he also gets more attention and time on the weekends from me. He's squeaking right now for attention. There will be lots of wrapping in fleece today for him.
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cooper88
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Post by cooper88 on Jan 8, 2023 10:51:58 GMT -5
I am upright and pondering my day. Glad to be only a little stiff but not actually sore this morning. I'll knock out some light housework and then a few things in the yard. I foresee at least a couple of hours stretched out watching something mindless.
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ken a.k.a OMK
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Post by ken a.k.a OMK on Jan 8, 2023 11:04:16 GMT -5
Try a hair dryer if that's easier.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jan 8, 2023 11:11:17 GMT -5
Jerseyguy finally homeYAY But having frustrations about the lines going to oxygen concentrator and himself. Connecting the 2 hoses is a little straight plastic tube and super hard to get off old hose to put into new. Poured boiling water to soften - burnt my fingers. Used knife to cut off - cut my finger. Swearing helped minimally. Finally got it done. My BP must be up but sitting here typing helps. I hope dealing with the tubes becomes easier for you. Glad for you both he is back home.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Jan 8, 2023 11:43:05 GMT -5
Happy Sunday! Had a lazy morning, my favorite kind of Sunday morning. Now husband and I are going to go for a quick hike before the Eagles play later this afternoon.
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