what are you doing right now?

[finnime]

Good morning, bright and sage invisipeeps, meeting in Y Ma'am for some tea and conversation. Welcome to Wednesday, the last of 2022. I hope your day culminates in good health for everyone, and provides welcome dessert.

Today I'll set the house to rights now that DD is back in her own home. I invited DSis to come New Year's Eve to spend the night. Us old folks will go out to eat at a very nice restaurant and attempt to stay up for the fireworks over the water. We'll fail. It will be a good start to 2023.

I'm so glad we moved here.

The sunrise yesterday was almost completely blocked by clouds, but broke through.

[ken a.k.a OMK]

Dec 27, 2022 22:46:54 GMT -5 Works4me said:

I would like to know who is responsible for making all of the print smaller.

I have my screen zoom on 175% for this site and use a 32" monitor.

[Deleted]

Dec 27, 2022 19:42:22 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Since COVID seems to have little rhyme or reason and can make even people with the vaccines terribly ill (or worse), even though the vaccines make that less likely, I give people I know and socialize with, the same courtesies I’d like them to give me, if there is a known potential for exposure. 

I know taz has decided to do that but wanted to chime in a bit late anyway. Most people seem pretty laid-back about COVID now. Last month I had a short conversation in a small room with someone at church, both of us unmasked but fully vaccinated, and she e-mailed on Monday and said she had COVID. The Garden Club lunch was Tuesday. I sat with 3 other people, wore a mask and explained why. Eventually they told me to ditch the mask because they couldn't hear me! This is an older and likely vaccinated crowd. I tested 2 days later and it was negative.

Still, you don't know what others are dealing with. My neighbor across the street got a heart transplant 3 or 4 years ago. He rarely goes anywhere in public and his wife is VERY cautious. Always good to give people the facts.

Another quiet day today. I may venture out for more bird seed. I think the birds are hungry because it's colder but the darned grackles just swarm over everything. The only way to thwart them would be one of those perches that drops down to cover the food if a heavy animal sits on it and that would mean some of the heavier woodpecker species would be shut out, too.

[wvugurl26]

I'm up and logged in. I wish I had enough time off to cover this week as well. I need these days to recover. Big birthday dinner for MIL tonight. And later this week making the rounds of all DH's family that I missed while I was home with my family.

[cooper88]

I'm drinking coffee and trying to get ready to go into the office. I've been off for several days and it's hard getting back in the groove.

[giramomma]

And, DS is sick.

[daisylu]

Dec 28, 2022 9:13:25 GMT -5 giramomma said:

And, DS is sick.

Yuck.

[daisylu]

Waiting to get car inspected. Hoping the windshield wiper flying off on my way down the road isn't an omen. Luckily there was an auto shop on the way that installs them for free as well. They should for $41 for 1 wiper. 😡

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Dec 27, 2022 20:24:42 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

In other news, Mister and I have come to the conclusion that his Dad is very spoiled. He really doesn’t seem to like to have to think. Mister has been trying to keep him on track with taking his medicine, and on time. A couple days ago, his Dad told him that his Mom use to just bring him his medicine when it was time for him to take it. Mister was like “ummmmm, no sir. I set everything out for you, you can at least go get it yourself and take it”.

I’m thinking that maybe because his Mom has had health issues for so long and was limited in what she could do physically, she became the brains of the operation and her job was to keep him on track with everything that needed to be done. Or maybe that’s just how they operated anyway, for whatever reason. When he visits her at the hospital, she still reminds him to do this and that each time, even though he doesn’t necessarily do any of the things she reminds him about. She’s not home to know whether he does it or not, so I guess it’s whatever in his mind.

And I could very well be wrong about everything I said in that last paragraph, I just really don’t know. And neither does Mister. But it’s become very clear that he doesn’t even want to think about even simple things and prefers for Mister to just tell him what to do when he needs to do it. Not that he always does that either. He will literally ask Mister what time it is, instead of looking at his phone in his lap to see what time it is. If Mister says “Daddy look at your phone and tell me what time it is”, he’ll look at his phone and tell Mister what time it is. 

I think part of what we are dealing with is just laziness, mentally and physically. Not all of it, but some of it. And I think that part of it comes from Mister’s Mom not being around to think for him and keep him on track.

I’m not knocking him or Mister’s Mom, just trying to really understand what Mister and I are dealing with with his Dad. Although I did tell Mister a couple days ago when we were talking about it, that if a lot of this is just who his Dad has always been because his Mom handled all the thinking for him, I can’t imagine being married to someone like that for almost 50 years. We would’ve BEEN divorced, if I didn’t smother him with a pillow while he was sleeping. 

He and his Dad keep saying how she is a good woman, and she is. But I don’t know about doing all that making a woman a “good woman”. But that’s just me, with all my ignorance about relationships and being married to someone for decades.

Yesterday when he and Mister got back from visiting Mom, when he came inside, Dad was like “Whew! I’m tired!” I asked from what and he said from cleaning up that room this morning. Sir, the room is still a mess and there is still just a path on the floor from the door to the bed, so say what?! I didn’t actually say any of that out loud lol.

Mister’s Dad is not nearly as problematic as my Mom, thank GOD, but he’s not exactly easy to deal with either.

That's actually quite common in older marriages.  It's part of why men after their wives pass tend to move on and marry a lot sooner than women do.

The women ran literally everything that wasn't the man's job.   When their wives can no longer do it they turn around and realize they can't manage themselves so they look for another person to do it for them.

Women on the other hand having spent most of their lives taking care of others will go the opposite direction.  

It's also part of why married men tend to live longer lives whereas married women see their life span not insignificantly shortened.

I would keep encouraging him to do it for himself.  You both work full time and don't have the luxury of managing a grown person's entire life.   Save that energy for when you have no choice in the matter.   Also encouraging him to be as independent as possible will help with dementia.  You can't stop it's progression but you can somewhat keep it from speeding up by encouraging him to do as much as he can still manage to do on his own.

[Deleted]

Dec 28, 2022 9:18:55 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

That's actually quite common in older marriages.  It's part of why men after their wives pass tend to move on and marry a lot sooner than women do.

The women ran literally everything that wasn't the man's job.   When their wives can no longer do it they turn around and realize they can't manage themselves so they look for another person to do it for them.

Women on the other hand having spent most of their lives taking care of others will go the opposite direction.

Yep- I see that a lot. The only widow I know who remarried quickly was my step-grandmother and she did it for the financial security. Her first husband had elected a pension with a higher monthly payout but no survivor benefit (which now requires the notarized consent of the spouse). He died and so did his pension. Dad did NOT remarry after Mom died. He said he learned a lesson from Grandpa's experience.

I also wanted to say that I'm glad Pink's therapist is working out so well. I hadn't thought of a room of your own and I really like that idea given all the people coming and going in your house. My granddaughters have been asking me a lot of questions lately about living alone- whether I'd rather live with someone, what I do all day, whether I like it...it's really made me think. They can't relate because they're part of a family of 5. I'm pretty darn happy living alone but it would be very different if I didn't have friends and family as well.

[giramomma]

Dec 28, 2022 9:14:15 GMT -5 daisylu said:

Dec 28, 2022 9:13:25 GMT -5 giramomma said:

And, DS is sick.

Yuck.

Indeed.

Honestly, I think this is worse than Covid.

At least with Covid, you knew you had to watch out for Covid.

Now, it's like every. freaking.bug.

One of my coworkers has RSV, likely. She and her housemate are diligent about masking up.

I don't want to stay homebound. There's only so much of it you can do. And we have to save it for when it's -30 or -40 out.

But, I don't know where to take the kids, either. Because I can't risk them continuing to be sick.

[TheOtherMe]

First load of laundry is ready for the driver.

DN1 received a letter in the mail from the IRS because he has no US health insurance and suggesting he look at the exchange.  We are trying to figure out why this address was used because since he has lived in Toronto, he files with the Toronto address.  I have to scan it and email it to him.

When I picked up my held mail yesterday, there were 3 pieces that are not even close to this address.  So I have to take those back to the USPS.  That irks me even more that they returned NIL's check to the sender.  It's okay to give me the new SS amount for someone else without my name and address on it but they returned a check addressed to this address.

I also thought forwarding mail to a new address put your new address on record with the USPS.

[chiver78]

Dec 28, 2022 10:24:14 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

First load of laundry is ready for the driver.

DN1 received a letter in the mail from the IRS because he has no US health insurance and suggesting he look at the exchange.  We are trying to figure out why this address was used because since he has lived in Toronto, he files with the Toronto address.  I have to scan it and email it to him.

When I picked up my held mail yesterday, there were 3 pieces that are not even close to this address.  So I have to take those back to the USPS.  That irks me even more that they returned NIL's check to the sender.  It's okay to give me the new SS amount for someone else without my name and address on it but they returned a check addressed to this address.

I also thought forwarding mail to a new address put your new address on record with the USPS.

the proceeds check from the sale of the Cape house was returned because the carrier didn't think I lived there. it was accurately addressed to me. I was more than mildly annoyed.

[bean29]

Dec 28, 2022 8:34:55 GMT -5 @athena53 said:

Dec 27, 2022 19:42:22 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Since COVID seems to have little rhyme or reason and can make even people with the vaccines terribly ill (or worse), even though the vaccines make that less likely, I give people I know and socialize with, the same courtesies I’d like them to give me, if there is a known potential for exposure. 

I know taz has decided to do that but wanted to chime in a bit late anyway. Most people seem pretty laid-back about COVID now. Last month I had a short conversation in a small room with someone at church, both of us unmasked but fully vaccinated, and she e-mailed on Monday and said she had COVID. The Garden Club lunch was Tuesday. I sat with 3 other people, wore a mask and explained why. Eventually they told me to ditch the mask because they couldn't hear me! This is an older and likely vaccinated crowd. I tested 2 days later and it was negative.

Still, you don't know what others are dealing with. My neighbor across the street got a heart transplant 3 or 4 years ago. He rarely goes anywhere in public, and his wife is VERY cautious. Always good to give people the facts.

Another quiet day today. I may venture out for more bird seed. I think the birds are hungry because it's colder but the darned grackles just swarm over everything. The only way to thwart them would be one of those perches that drops down to cover the food if a heavy animal sits on it and that would mean some of the heavier woodpecker species would be shut out, too.

I have been taking my Mom to Church every Saturday.  We always sit in the same seats, and although they stopped the sign of peace greetings during Covid, they are now doing it again.  I know about 2 months ago I shook the hand of the Man that sits behind us every week.  We talked to them about 3 weeks ago and his wife told us he had a compromised immune system and somehow, he picked up a virus that landed him in the hospital.  he was so bad that one of his grandsons came and drove them to the hospital (The wife has macular degeneration, and her vison is too poor to drive).  I just decided that I am not going to shake hands in church anymore.  Most of the people at Mom's Church are late 50's or older with a heavy contingent of 75+.  I think in 10 years their membership will be way down.

I never had time to get vaccinated this fall where I could risk being sick for a few days.  I kind of had a cold before Christmas and was running behind anyways.  DH decided last week that we are going to Cancun on Friday, so I am going without having my Covid 19 shot boosted.  Hoping I stay healthy.  

I went to get out my suitcase for my trip and realized that I don't have a current dimension carry-on suitcase in my basement.  I have two older ones that no longer meet the specifications.  DD has two carry-ons that meet the current requirements (and she keeps at my house)- one is an Away bag and the other a Vince Camuto that she bought at TJ Max.  I texted my kids and found out DS has them.  Hopefully he had time to take them with him this am, because he works close to my house.  Otherwise, I will get them when I pick up my Dogs.  

DD said that when they said on the news that there were long lines at the check in counter at her airline in MKE the other day, it was b/c they had a couple people call out sick.  They did not have delays due to cancellations.  She said her BF ended up in the News Cast b/c he went in to cover for some of the employees that called out sick.  She said he was really mad about it (becasue it gave the impression that their airline was cancelling flights/or having delays when that was not true at all.  They were just taking a bit longer than normal to check passengers in for their flight.  I have a co-worker that was going to go to Florida for a week leaving on Friday.  Their Flights got cancelled with Southwest.  She did not know if her DH was able to re-book them.  She said they would not drive instead of flying.

[Sharon]

Dec 28, 2022 10:24:14 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I also thought forwarding mail to a new address put your new address on record with the USPS.

I think it is only for a year.  After a year they stop forwarding unless you wish to pay approx $40 to continue the forward.  I just got notification that my forwarding was getting ready to stop.  DD still uses my mailing address once in a while What I found that helps is I put a piece of tape on the inside door of the mailbox with our last names.  It also seemed to stop the flow of previous owners mail.

[minnesotapaintlady]

I think I have some kind of intestinal bug.  Yesterday morning I thought it was just something I ate the day before and I was fine after noonish, but today it's back.  I feel fine...just wouldn't want to be too far from a bathroom.   Crossing my fingers neither one of the kids gets it because they need to be healthy for work/school next week.

[giramomma]

Dec 28, 2022 10:38:39 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I think I have some kind of intestinal bug.  Yesterday morning I thought it was just something I ate the day before and I was fine after noonish, but today it's back.  I feel fine...just wouldn't want to be too far from a bathroom.   Crossing my fingers neither one of the kids gets it because they need to be healthy for work/school next week.

I am sorry.

If it's what we have been dealing with..Do the clear liquids thing and BRAT diet for as long as you can stand it. And then do it for two more days.

We gave the peanut dairy too early, and it set her back another 3 or 4 days.

[minnesotapaintlady]

Dec 28, 2022 10:44:51 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Dec 28, 2022 10:38:39 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I think I have some kind of intestinal bug.  Yesterday morning I thought it was just something I ate the day before and I was fine after noonish, but today it's back.  I feel fine...just wouldn't want to be too far from a bathroom.   Crossing my fingers neither one of the kids gets it because they need to be healthy for work/school next week.

I am sorry.

If it's what we have been dealing with..Do the clear liquids thing and BRAT diet for as long as you can stand it. And then do it for two more days.

We gave the peanut dairy too early, and it set her back another 3 or 4 days.

I'm just going to not eat.  I can fast 24-36 hours pretty easily and maybe the food break is all I need.  I've been eating a LOT of junk the last few days that I don't normally...I mean...I normally eat a lot of junk...but this is new holiday junk.  LOL 

[chiver78]

my dogs are losing their minds right now. 🙄 I've got a landscaper doing winter cleanup today (not the one I've used the past 2y with the questionable pricing practices...) but there's 2 guys outside with leafblowers and a chainsaw. LD is following them around from inside, going window to window. Punk barks when he does.

on the agenda today are trips to Walmart and BJs. and I just grabbed the laptop to do some research on chest freezers. apparently it hadn't fully shut down when I threw it in the office last Thursday. oops. so now I'm clearing the recovery messages on everything that was open.

[minnesotapaintlady]

Apparently I left my purse at my mom's last night.  Good thing I have zero plans that involve going anywhere or spending anything for the next few days.

[snapdragon]

I am at work after a really crummy night of little sleep. I am fasting on top of that due to my annual check up that is this afternoon. After that I go to the dentist today too. All I want is to take a nap or eat but that is not going to happen until 5 or so tonight.

I have the feeling it's going to be a HANGRY day for most of it...What is not helping is I work for a food company so am unable to just turn away from food or be distracted by work. All of my paperwork has food involved.

So I am drinking water and having no sugar tea and my stomach is already growling. On a bright note I am only here for about 3.5 hours now.

[TheOtherMe]

Dec 28, 2022 10:31:02 GMT -5 chiver78 said:

Dec 28, 2022 10:24:14 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

First load of laundry is ready for the driver.

DN1 received a letter in the mail from the IRS because he has no US health insurance and suggesting he look at the exchange.  We are trying to figure out why this address was used because since he has lived in Toronto, he files with the Toronto address.  I have to scan it and email it to him.

When I picked up my held mail yesterday, there were 3 pieces that are not even close to this address.  So I have to take those back to the USPS.  That irks me even more that they returned NIL's check to the sender.  It's okay to give me the new SS amount for someone else without my name and address on it but they returned a check addressed to this address.

I also thought forwarding mail to a new address put your new address on record with the USPS.

the proceeds check from the sale of the Cape house was returned because the carrier didn't think I lived there. it was accurately addressed to me. I was more than mildly annoyed.

NIL is p*ssed and I'm sure you were, too.  These checks come every month and have been for about 18 months.  Why was this returned?

[saveinla]

Dec 28, 2022 11:01:16 GMT -5 snapdragon said:

I am at work after a really crummy night of little sleep. I am fasting on top of that due to my annual check up that is this afternoon. After that I go to the dentist today too. All I want is to take a nap or eat but that is not going to happen until 5 or so tonight.

I have the feeling it's going to be a HANGRY day for most of it...What is not helping is I work for a food company so am unable to just turn away from food or be distracted by work. All of my paperwork has food involved.

So I am drinking water and having no sugar tea and my stomach is already growling. On a bright note I am only here for about 3.5 hours now.

Ouch - hope the time passes by quickly and you can get to eat something soon.

[TheOtherMe]

Dec 28, 2022 10:37:16 GMT -5 Sharon said:

Dec 28, 2022 10:24:14 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I also thought forwarding mail to a new address put your new address on record with the USPS.

I think it is only for a year.  After a year they stop forwarding unless you wish to pay approx $40 to continue the forward.  I just got notification that my forwarding was getting ready to stop.  DD still uses my mailing address once in a while What I found that helps is I put a piece of tape on the inside door of the mailbox with our last names.  It also seemed to stop the flow of previous owners mail.

Yes the actual forwarding has stopped but it's supposed to notify the post office it is now your address of record.    This had my address on it as that is the address she has given the company.  I have received all kinds of mail addressed here since they moved to Toronto, almost 3 years ago.  So why did this one get returned.  I received checks for her pay from the University of Michigan twice.  She said the December check from this company is always the largest and it's going to be on her 1099.  She never received the check.  I reported it missing on the dashboard and nothing.  So I called the post office.  Postmaster kept telling me we don't have any Russians here.     1st, don't discriminate like that.  2nd, she is Ukranian not Russian and that was an insult.  

No, I did not tell NIL that part.

I did the tape thing with their names and dad's name because his mail was also forwarded here.  

There was no previous owner for my house.  I just get the wrong person's mail periodically.

[weltschmerz]

Dec 28, 2022 4:15:09 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Dec 28, 2022 3:08:03 GMT -5 weltschmerz said:

My BFF broke her back today playing pickleball. She's at the Verdun General Hospital with fractured vertebrae.

My OTHER BFF is losing her mind because her grandson was admitted to the Allan Memorial Institute, a psychiatric hospital. He had a severe psychotic break, out of the blue. He's 19. He's also suicidal.

This is some holiday!

I'm sorry.
Is your other BFF still in the hospital? The one with the charming boyfriend?

No, she's been home for a while. Her life now is nothing but doctors' appointments.
She's the one with the psychotic/suicidal grandson. I've known her for 30 years. The BFF who broke her back, I've known since I was 11. 

[weltschmerz]

Dec 28, 2022 10:38:39 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I think I have some kind of intestinal bug.  Yesterday morning I thought it was just something I ate the day before and I was fine after noonish, but today it's back.  I feel fine...just wouldn't want to be too far from a bathroom.   Crossing my fingers neither one of the kids gets it because they need to be healthy for work/school next week.

I hope you feel better soon.

[weltschmerz]

Dec 28, 2022 11:12:51 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Dec 28, 2022 10:37:16 GMT -5 Sharon said:

I think it is only for a year.  After a year they stop forwarding unless you wish to pay approx $40 to continue the forward.  I just got notification that my forwarding was getting ready to stop.  DD still uses my mailing address once in a while What I found that helps is I put a piece of tape on the inside door of the mailbox with our last names.  It also seemed to stop the flow of previous owners mail.

Yes the actual forwarding has stopped but it's supposed to notify the post office it is now your address of record.    This had my address on it as that is the address she has given the company.  I have received all kinds of mail addressed here since they moved to Toronto, almost 3 years ago.  So why did this one get returned.  I received checks for her pay from the University of Michigan twice.  She said the December check from this company is always the largest and it's going to be on her 1099.  She never received the check.  I reported it missing on the dashboard and nothing.  So I called the post office.  Postmaster kept telling me we don't have any Russians here.     1st, don't discriminate like that.  2nd, she is Ukranian not Russian and that was an insult.  

No, I did not tell NIL that part.

I did the tape thing with their names and dad's name because his mail was also forwarded here.  

There was no previous owner for my house.  I just get the wrong person's mail periodically.

I wonder what he meant by that. No Russians in the neighbourhood? No Russians working there?
Yes, it is an insult.

[seriousthistime]

I know too many people who have hurt themselves playing pickle ball.  Same with riding a bicycle. 

I don't do either "healthy activity."

Last night I spent on the couch with my DS's dog, at their house.  They were away from the house for the night and their old dog has anxiety.  My little dog stayed home and slept in her crate.  Both dogs did just fine and are very happy today. My house and theirs are a few miles apart so in the evening I split my time between the two houses, then little dog went into her crate and DS's dog got her last out at around 10 pm, then she and I hunkered down and I read until about midnight. 

The weather is warming up.  Not enough for my liking and not enough to enjoy walking dogs, but we are making progress at least. 

I have lunch planned with friends.  I stepped on the scale the other day.  It was not kind to me. 

I have been reading Bad Blood, about Elizabeth Holmes and the Theranos fraud.  I am also reading a court transcript about blood testing and DNA. I do hope these are my only two encounters with blood this week. 

Reading what people are saying about changing the guest beds.  I usually do that just when I know someone is going to be staying the night. That way I don't have to wonder if I changed the bed from last time; I know I need to do it right before they come.  And if I don't have a guest for 6 months, my next guest will have fresh-smelling sheets.

[taz157]

Dec 28, 2022 10:50:58 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Dec 28, 2022 10:44:51 GMT -5 giramomma said:

I am sorry.

If it's what we have been dealing with..Do the clear liquids thing and BRAT diet for as long as you can stand it. And then do it for two more days.

We gave the peanut dairy too early, and it set her back another 3 or 4 days.

I'm just going to not eat.  I can fast 24-36 hours pretty easily and maybe the food break is all I need.  I've been eating a LOT of junk the last few days that I don't normally...I mean...I normally eat a lot of junk...but this is new holiday junk.  LOL 

2 weeks ago, my mom came to our house to discuss who was making what Christmas cookies. I made what we had discussed and doubled the recipe for both cookies. How many did my mom take when we swapped cookies on Christmas Eve: About 10 cookies of all prepared. She also made a small batch of something I made so didn’t take any of those cookies. When my dad was here, he took none.

Let’s just say, I was not pleased as we have a ton of cookies. Next year, I’m making 1 batch.

[wvugurl26]

Can you freeze the cookies Taz? I did that for my cookie table at my wedding. I was paranoid to the max about food allergies so I personally baked them all. Yes, I'm insane.