what are you doing right now?

[taz157]

Dec 23, 2022 21:25:46 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Dec 23, 2022 20:27:10 GMT -5 taz157 said:

((((Hugs))))

Thanks. I suspect that part of it too is I am out far enough out of crisis mode where there is no need for me to be strong and all of that.

In a few weeks, it will be two years since dad went to the hospital to essentially die.

Last year I was simply grateful to be alive and all the feelz that go with a health thing.

Part of me is like "WTF" I fought the good fight do deal with sick kids for two months? That's it? That's what I get to look forward to?

For a year I yearned just to have my ordinary life back. Now that I have it, I don't want it.

I don't know that the alternative was. One of my coworkers died 4 years ago. For some reason, thank goodness, the whole office knew she head breast cancer except for me. She elected to not get treated with medically accepted treatment. Which, given how long she lived when she was sick, I don't think found out when, say the cancer had gone to her bones.

I think about her, and I absolutely know I could never make that choice. She was estranged from her kid and went through a bad divorce. I think she had a lot of friends. Her relationship with her mom was also dubious. Even with those things, I am no wired to try to treat cancer with yoga. I can't imagine not fighting.

But, I'd like to think I fought for more than the privilege of cleaning up substances that are forcefully evicted from my kids' bodies.

 

I hope things improve soon so that no one, especially you, is in crisis mode.

[giramomma]

Dec 23, 2022 18:28:18 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

My mom is fighting some weird pneumonia-like thing so Christmas Eve at their house has been postponed.  Her sisters took her to urgent care in FL 10 days ago and it still hasn't improved with antibiotics.  We shall be hunkered down an additional day at home I guess.

I am sorry. Illness type things are so freaking potent this year.

[giramomma]

Dec 23, 2022 21:41:21 GMT -5 stillmovingforward said:

Double hugs. Once the pressure is off, it can be hard to move forward in the same fashion you did before.

Thank you.

No one tells you that.

After I was all done with treatment, and the nurse went through what next..there was a big checklist that was something like "Getting back to your regular commitments" I looked at her and said, um. I never stopped doing the things I was supposed to do while I was being treated. I just added treatment to the plate.

I'm pretty sure they warned me about scanxiety.

No one warned me about this weird place. 

[stillmovingforward]

Dec 23, 2022 23:11:31 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Dec 23, 2022 21:41:21 GMT -5 stillmovingforward said:

Double hugs. Once the pressure is off, it can be hard to move forward in the same fashion you did before.

Thank you.

No one tells you that.

After I was all done with treatment, and the nurse went through what next..there was a big checklist that was something like "Getting back to your regular commitments" I looked at her and said, um. I never stopped doing the things I was supposed to do while I was being treated. I just added treatment to the plate.

I'm pretty sure they warned me about scanxiety.

No one warned me about this weird place. 

That weird place is harder than treatment was for me. And took to longer to navigate. Everyone thinks you should be dancing because treatment is finished. But your whole foundation has been shifted and the house you've lived in all your life will be different going forward.
I struggled a lot in that phase. Still do sometimes.

You have my sympathy. Lots of it!

[minnesotapaintlady]

Got my 2nd (actually my 1st) wind of the day and got all the presents wrapped.  Now I have my bed back for the first time in weeks so tomorrow I can pile all the laundry on it that was taking over the laundry room and get it sorted and put away before the dog shows up and moves into the laundry.  I had to make arrangements with ANOTHER neighbor to dogsit the dog I was sitting when I go out of town on Sunday.

[toomuchreality]

Dec 23, 2022 14:03:57 GMT -5 finnime said:

Also glad I can sign in. I'm about to bake a pecan pie and cheesecake before we go out to eat at an Italian restaurant. It's been raining most of the day. I did wrap and wrap presents. Have more wrapping to go; also, need to decorate tree already. Maybe when DD wakes from her nap.

I have a card with $20 in it ready for the mail carrier. Do you do this--give the carrier anything at the holidays? DH thinks it's important. I agree it is for the trash and recycling crews, but the USPS? Unsure.

I have done something nice for my mail carrier, for probably the last 15-17 years. This year, I can't afford it, which makes me feel bad.
This year, I don't know who my carrier is. I haven't met them. But that's not the reason I'm not doing anything. If anything, that makes me want to do it more.
I like knowing my letter carrier. And I like them to know I thought about them/care.

My favorite uncle was a mailman. So was my sister and my boyfriend, before they died. Maybe that's why I care. Idk.

[finnime]

Good morning, you beautiful (invisible) people of Y Ma'am. Welcome to Saturday, Christmas Eve for those who celebrate. I hope this day brings you respite from travails and privation; that your power stays on; that no one in the house pukes or pees outside of authorized areas; that you see the beauty in your life or at least the value in you, yourself in this world; that you have your pick of desserts.

It's 12 degrees out, Fahrenheit. DH really does not want me to go to the beach until it's a bit warmer, above 20, so I won't. I may give Franklin the Dog a frozen bone from a cow leg I got from the farmer a month ago.

Today I'll finish decorating the tree, make meringue mushrooms for the buche de noel I'll make tomorrow morning before we go to DSis's, make mashed potatoes and creamed onions, and maybe the dough for the cloverleaf rolls tomorrow. We are going out to eat dinner today at 2:30 and to the candlelight service at 7:00 at our Unitarian church which is just spectacular.

DS made it to Topeka last night around midnight. He'll get to Denver today. So he'll be in his new home with his cat for Christmas. I'm so glad he's safe so far. He left a day later than he had originally planned but then got all the way to Indiana the first day. I need to plan a trip out to visit him there.

This is our UU church in town here:

[bean29]

Dec 23, 2022 15:19:30 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I couldn't get on this morning either.  

Downtown Milwaukee didn't get all that much snow but the wind is still howling.  At my house, the wind is still setting off notifications on my alarm system.

It's -2 with a feels like of -18.  I'm not walking to Starbucks.  Not seeing much activity around here.  

I brought one of my ceramic Christmas trees with me and I'm glad I did.  Hotel is having limited dining for breakfast tomorrow and giving complimentary box lunches.  No food service on Christmas except for box lunches.  

giramomma   I was going to call DHS about my dad but my sister would know it was me because I was the only one who knew what I was going to tell them.  That was about the time the doctor represented hospice and when they came out, we were told they would not do home hospice in his current situation.  He had to go to assisted living or a nursing home.  My sister really questioned the social worker.  So I got my confirmation then, but still thought he needed a nursing home.  Sadly, I was correct.

You are in Milwaukee for Christmas? Do you have plans for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day?-‘cause my family has room for an extra guest or two.

DD lives Downtown near Fiserv Forum. She uses Door Dash a lot. I think downtown will be pretty quiet over the weekend-so don’t be afraid to take your car out.

[MarionTh230]

On my second cup of coffee. Between DH and kiddo I didn't sleep well and got up entirely way too early. Today is the day I needed to sleep in. At 6yo Kiddo still believes in Santa. Which means I'll be up late tonight and out of bed early tomorrow. I don’t want to waste the day away, but if I get the opportunity to sneak in a nap I'm taking it.

[daisylu]

Still super cold here. -15 with winch chill. Luckily the higher winds should die down later today. We have been lucky with the power holding on - my parents not so much. They were supposed to leave for Kentucky today, but mom said if the power was still out this morning they world stay home. Need to text her.

Hoping to finally get DS's compact fridge out of my house today.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

My sister sent me a pic of Harriet on my niece’s lap assuming the position she is in when I am there.  I miss both brats already.  That’s stupid.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Docked in Cozumel, where it is overcast and raining.  Ship did some rocking and rolling last night.  We have nothing scheduled, so will tak3 advantage of a mostl6 empty ship to do laundry and hit the spa.  

[andi9899]

Dec 23, 2022 21:57:03 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Gwen and I made peanut butter fudge from my mom's recipe.

It's super easy a can of condensed milk, a bag of butterscotch chips and a cup of peanut butter all melted together and pour into a pan lined with greased wax paper.

She was pretty excited to participate.

Then we made rice krispie treats. I was concerned at first because Gwen was freewheeling it but she nailed it.

If we couldn't get it my dad assured me he has made them before so he would take over if we botched it.

I had more ambitions but yet again DH let one of Abbys friends stay the night. But she wants to go home instead and her mom won't be available till 11.

And drama ensues between the kids. They are getting along now.

I could strangle DH. He never learns. It is not going to tramautize Abby if we don't allow sleepovers anymore. I don't care about his memories as a kid.

As sexist as it sounds girls really are different than boys and I just do not have the patience for tween girl drama. I got enough with my own I don't need bonus tweens.

I don't think it's sexist, girls are just different than boys. Especially the tween/teen variety. T1 and I were talking about her coworker's tween daughter and her struggles with her and her attitude. A friend of mine has a 13 yo she's dealing with the same thing with. Girls that age suck. Period. Mine did too. Can you make a rule that he deals with all kid stuff if he agrees to a sleepover?

[gacpa]

The pictures of the church are just beautiful.  I absolutely love the Christmas inflatables pictures, where you live is so beautiful.  So THANK YOU both.  Merry Christmas to all!

[daisylu]

Parents will not be traveling after all this weekend. They have a generator, so they have heat and power should be back sometime today.

Is it wrong that even though we made no other plans for Christmas day that I still don't want to visit them? I don't really want them to visit me either. I think I just want to enjoy a quiet day at home.

[Deleted]

Dec 23, 2022 20:24:33 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

He really does not like cold weather at all, and even before it got cold, he preferred for one of us to go out with him before he would go down the steps and do his business. But now, even though it’s cold, even if we don’t go out with him, if he really needs to go, he’ll run down the steps and do his business, then run back to the door so he can come inside.

I've been telling my grandchildren stories- they LOVE stories- about a teacup Yorkie that DS and I took care of for a friend when she went on a trip or a couple of weeks. I thought it was cute and thought we might even buy one ourselves. It was stupid. It was sneaky. It was neurotic. It barked all the time. (I later learned from a coworker that dogs that are bred to be little sometimes end up with less-desirable traits and that they're one-person dogs.) If you didn't go outside with it, it would scratch and whine till you let it in and then poop on the floor. I think it went nuts over the snow outside. We were SO happy to turn the darn thing back over to its owner. So I did a good deed and it kept me from buying a teacup Yorkie.

[skeeter]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY catsareme !!

I know this will not be your best birthday ever, but I sincerely hope it turns out to be a good day despite everything that has happened this year.

[daisylu]

I'm still lounging in bed. DH just got up to get a cup of coffee and left the bedroom door open, annoying me.

Since I am off work until Thursday I'm thinking about taking a turkey out of the freezer. We really need to get one of the freezers cleared out so the chest one can be defrosted. Might just go ahead and replace it anyway. It's at least 25 years old and the seal is in bad shape.

ETA - This made me google if the seal can be replaced and it can. Might go that route

[cooper88]

I'm drinking coffee out of a snowman mug and pondering my day. I need to make some rolls. All other activities are optional.

[empress of self-improvement]

I'm waiting on my coffee then who knows. I have nowhere to be until 7 tonight so I'll probably just beach myself on the couch and catch up on some reading. Or work on a puzzle. Or maybe even do some Christmas cards. Haven't felt like doing them since DH died. In all honesty, I still don't feel like it. Bah humbug.

[MarionTh230]

Wrapped the last 4 gifts while Sleeping Beauty is still in bed.  They were delivered Monday, but with school being out I haven't had any private time away from the Kiddo to wrap them.

Put fresh seed out for the birds.  Looks like they are having a good time out there.

House is warm enough and I've been moving around long enough that I'm about to get showered.  Then start cooking a few things - mainly the desserts for tomorrow.  Today's menus is just finger sandwiches, dips, and cheese tray.  My sibling will be headed this way sometime today.  I'll get the icing ready and put her in charge of cookie decorating with the Kiddo.  DH should be home from work around 2:30 or so.  We should have everything done by then so we can just hang out and do whatever we want.  I feel certain Kiddo will convince us that whatever we decide to do should include hot cocoa though. 

[TheOtherMe]

Dec 24, 2022 6:29:19 GMT -5 bean29 said:

Dec 23, 2022 15:19:30 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I couldn't get on this morning either.  

Downtown Milwaukee didn't get all that much snow but the wind is still howling.  At my house, the wind is still setting off notifications on my alarm system.

It's -2 with a feels like of -18.  I'm not walking to Starbucks.  Not seeing much activity around here.  

I brought one of my ceramic Christmas trees with me and I'm glad I did.  Hotel is having limited dining for breakfast tomorrow and giving complimentary box lunches.  No food service on Christmas except for box lunches.  

You are in Milwaukee for Christmas? Do you have plans for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day?-‘cause my family has room for an extra guest or two.

DD lives Downtown near Fiserv Forum. She uses Door Dash a lot. I think downtown will be pretty quiet over the weekend-so don’t be afraid to take your car out.

Thank you for the offer.  Introverted me took the trip because I didn't want to deal with my family, so my plan all along has been to stay at the hotel and enjoy not being in my place.

I may see if Door Dash has something promising.  If not, I brought food.  

There isn't much going on around here this morning.  Did hear lots of sirens last night but sounds quiet so far.  

I am a mile away from the McGuire Center.  I haven't seen a lot of places I've seen before when I've been here so I must be in a different area of downtown.

[giramomma]

Dec 23, 2022 23:33:50 GMT -5 stillmovingforward said:

Dec 23, 2022 23:11:31 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Thank you.

No one tells you that.

After I was all done with treatment, and the nurse went through what next..there was a big checklist that was something like "Getting back to your regular commitments" I looked at her and said, um. I never stopped doing the things I was supposed to do while I was being treated. I just added treatment to the plate.

I'm pretty sure they warned me about scanxiety.

No one warned me about this weird place. 

That weird place is harder than treatment was for me. And took to longer to navigate. Everyone thinks you should be dancing because treatment is finished. But your whole foundation has been shifted and the house you've lived in all your life will be different going forward.
I struggled a lot in that phase. Still do sometimes.

You have my sympathy. Lots of it!

Thank you for understanding. I cannot express how much I appreciate it.

[TheOtherMe]

Talked to NIL's mother on FB messenger this morning.  She did have to return to Ukraine because her visa was going to expire.  Her husband got home from the ship and they have been staying in Moldova.  They are currently visiting their daughter and her son in Lincoln, Nebraska and will return to Moldova after the first of the year.

She said it's too dangerous to go to Kyiv to see her mother.

I will never know what happened in regards to her up and leaving Toronto where she had refugee status for the foreseeable future.

[giramomma]

DH did supply me with what it wanted for Christmas.

I'm opting to get him that instead of paying for the watch. It's cheaper, and he'll also need it.

Well, off I go. DS should be home in 12 hours.

[susana1954]

It was 11 here this morning! I had cut the heat back to 65 (normally 60), and it was so cold when I got up.  I double-bagged Penny (sweater + thin coat) and took her out.  Thankfully, she was in a "business-like" mode.  Then she hit the bonanza on her dog Advent calendar.  Apparently, the filler just dumped whatever was left in the last container so she had some of everything.  Happy little dog!

I have church this evening so I got my hair washed and dried.  My daughter's family is coming afterwards.  Maybe Penny will be more amenable since it will be dark outside.  I really do wish she liked my family and they liked her.  They try . . . at least in theory.  She just isn't the kind of dog who likes rowdy kids.  And with five, that is inevitable.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I had two rice krispy treats for breakfast.

Since my kid made them I have the power to consume half the pan before anyone else gets some.😆

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Back from breakfast and just tossed laundry into the washer.  This is the time to do it, when most are off the ship.

It’s raining and ugly out today.  The surf is high enough that no dive boats are going out at all and there really are no excursions I want to get drenched for.  Also, this gives the blister I got on my heel another day to heal.  Damn socks!  I wore those shoes just fine without socks, but tried some no show socks and got a blister.  

We had breakfast this morning with 2 couples from MN.  They were on the WC that got aborted in 2020, and sent home from Dubai before borders closed, so they are trying it again.  In the laundry room, met the bridge instructor.  I think we are going to need refresher course since we last played last year.  

We bought my sister and her daughters tickets to see The Nutcracker in Seattle.  Hope the roads are decent enough for her to get there.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Dec 24, 2022 10:33:29 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I had two rice krispy treats for breakfast.

Since my kid made them I have the power to consume half the pan before anyone else gets some.😆

I think Rice Krispy Treats are the cause of my Covid 15.  I have no self control, neither does TD so don5 make them anymore.

[teen persuasion]

Hallelujah!  DS4's boss got some sense, texted this am and told DS4 to stay home.

The LES bands have shifted north from Bflo to us.  So southtowns are using the (relative)reprieve to get the plows back on the road again; they had to pull the plows during the total whiteouts.  It will shift back south again later.

DH said he heard (can't see anything) heavy equipment outside - I'm guessing earth mover to dig out a drift that tends to form across the road just south of our treeline.  It's open farmfield south of us, so always get blowing & drifting there.

Just heard a plow- swivel my head to look out the window to confirm, pointless, the lower window screens are clogged with snow, and upper halves have 3" piled up with splotches stuck here and there in the "open" spots above.