what are you doing right now?

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I wish we had better public transportation here but that is just not a high priority to our elected officials.  Our mayor has gone so far as to say "everyone drives".  

They keep building everything father and father away and in areas where walking is not safe.  The companies get tax breaks for developing "rural" areas of the city.

So they are right "everyone" needs to drive if you want to get anywhere. They forget that not everyone CAN drive or has family who can drive them.

There is a very limited bus schedule between Omaha and CB. I'd have to be up at 4:30 am or I am not getting into work till 10-11am when the next bus shows up.  Unless I want to boat across the river I have to drive to work.

That being said there is a difference between not knowing or really needing to know how to drive because you have a plethora of non-car options vs YD being a passenger princess.

It'd be unfathomable to me for Gwen not to want to drive either.  Not from the car perspective but because her learning to handle her own transportation needs is a step towards independence from me. In our case that means driving.

It's the complete lack of desire YD seems to have to be independent that baffles me. While on the other hand deciding she is adult enough to drop out of college.  You want me to baby you I am going to start treating you like one. You want to be Miss independent then you figure out how to get to work that doesn't involve me taking off work to come get you.

[NoNamePerson]

Oct 30, 2024 8:49:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

Oct 30, 2024 7:03:48 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

I was happy to realize my brain waited till after 4am to start spinning today.

Ds has been working on a language arts project for a couple weeks - writing about a hero's journey about someone who has personally impacted him. He's writing about dh's transition which I suggested. Turns out it's a speech not a paper and he's including something about how going to Rocky Horror Picture Show as a teenager- ds age to be exact - opened his eyes to more options than his conservative Christian upbringing had presented. I about died laughing at the idea of Rocky being presented academically to a group of freshman highschoolers.

He's gotten good peer reviews on his work so far. Hopefully the teacher is as amused as I was. Rocky doesn't play locally anymore but it is a different world.

I remember being completely shocked and disturbed by rocky horror as an early teen…but I think it was more the cannibalism and questionable consent.

Anybody want some meatloaf.  

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 30, 2024 12:49:57 GMT -5 NoNamePerson said:

Oct 30, 2024 8:49:41 GMT -5 lurkyloo said:

I remember being completely shocked and disturbed by rocky horror as an early teen…but I think it was more the cannibalism and questionable consent.

Anybody want some meatloaf.  

I apparently do not pay attention AT ALL because it wasn't until last year I finally got that scene.

ETA: I was also well into my 30s before I had my mom walk me through why they are dancing around with saran wrap during Greased Lightning.

[minnesotapaintlady]

Oct 30, 2024 12:06:09 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Oct 30, 2024 10:16:59 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

It seems so bizarre to me that he doesn't make her drive. I'm already stalking the driver's ed site to get Carrot in a class next summer right after he hits 15.

Depending on costs, it might not seem all that bizarre.

Drivers ed is just about 700 here. That's for the classroom to get the permit and then the 12 hours of observation/instruction.

Then of course, there's the costs of having a car, insurance, gas, and all that.

My lightly used (aka, 5 year old grandma car with 30K miles on it) was still 20K. DS's junker truck he bought was still 4K. He now owns a 2011 car with 60K on it and paid 10K for it.

If you don't have a friend of a friend that can give you a 20 year old car with 150K miles or more on it that you can still trust...it's expensive.

And then you need to balance the costs with need. I know it's a need for you for Carrot.

Where I work, they strongly suggest you take public transportation, because there is 0 parking available, and if you can get it, it is expensive. The daily lot rate is $15. We can either pay for me to park for a year, or we can go on a 4-night get away as our big summer family vacation. We can't do both.

The kids live a mile from school. There are busses that go past their school and our house.

The kids could walk/bike to their jobs in 10 minutes.

I am very hard pressed to say that it's worth it to spend several hundred a month so that the kids can save 15-20 minutes over the course of a week.  I honestly can't find a justification for that, especially given that DD1, while taking 5 AP courses this year, still can find the time to binge watch tv a few times a week.

If we were rural, it would be different.

She's an adult, not a teenager.  There's no way I would keep lugging my adult child around all over so they didn't have to pay for a car.  They don't need drivers ed here once you turn 18 so that wouldn't be an issue.

eta: And if a car isn't necessary where they live then Mister still shouldn't have to be driving her around. My son spent 4 years in Minneapolis with no car and somehow managed to get everywhere he needed to go.

[minnesotapaintlady]

I got to watch my heart valves today as I needed an echo.  It was pretty cool. The biology major nerd in me was geeking out.

[minnesotapaintlady]

Oct 30, 2024 12:38:52 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I wish we had better public transportation here but that is just not a high priority to our elected officials.  Our mayor has gone so far as to say "everyone drives".  

They keep building everything father and father away and in areas where walking is not safe.  The companies get tax breaks for developing "rural" areas of the city.

So they are right "everyone" needs to drive if you want to get anywhere. They forget that not everyone CAN drive or has family who can drive them.

There is a very limited bus schedule between Omaha and CB. I'd have to be up at 4:30 am or I am not getting into work till 10-11am when the next bus shows up.  Unless I want to boat across the river I have to drive to work.

That being said there is a difference between not knowing or really needing to know how to drive because you have a plethora of non-car options vs YD being a passenger princess.

It'd be unfathomable to me for Gwen not to want to drive either.  Not from the car perspective but because her learning to handle her own transportation needs is a step towards independence from me. In our case that means driving.

It's the complete lack of desire YD seems to have to be independent that baffles me. While on the other hand deciding she is adult enough to drop out of college.  You want me to baby you I am going to start treating you like one. You want to be Miss independent then you figure out how to get to work that doesn't involve me taking off work to come get you.

Exactly.  I just will not be Plan A for my kids to get around forever.  Not saying I won't happily help them out now and then when they need it, everyone needs help sometimes, but day to day getting to their jobs?  Uh...no. 

[andi9899]

Oct 30, 2024 10:41:28 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Ok. Now I have to get off my ass and go clean this apartment and get the last few items left there. This should be fun.

I got most of it done, but not all of it. I need to go back tomorrow. I was going to just drop a car load off and go back for what is in my storage unit, but it looks like it's going to rain. Macy gets anxious when it storms and we're supposed to have a big one today. I'll just spend the evening unpacking. I was going to spend the day tomorrow unpacking and today cleaning the apartment. Guess I'll do a little if both each day.

I really hope the trees hold until the tree company can come trim them. My car is safely in the garage at least if we get hail. Hopefully I'm not filing insurance claims tomorrow. Fingers crossed!

[soupandstew]

I've been playing with the idea of changing up our Thanksgiving meal.  I love all the traditional foods but that makes no sense for just 2 people with a quite small fridge/freezer.  Nor does hours of cooking and a long clean-up make sense either.  I talked to DH about it today and he's totally onboard with something I'm calling "grazing all day" which will allow us to watch the parade and some football and enjoy good food without excess work.  Some things will be bought and some made at home.

This is what I have so far:

    Stuffed mushrooms (from Aldi, bake in oven for 20 minutes)
    Bacon-wrapped Brussels sprouts with maple syrup glaze (make at home)
    Spinach/artichoke dip from local restaurant with crostini
    Jumbo shrimp cocktail (make at home)
    Baba ghanoush and pita bread (Whole Foods)
    Kofta skewers (from Whole Foods, bake in oven or grill as weather allows)
    Tres leches cake portions (local bakery)

Ideas

[andi9899]

Oct 30, 2024 10:16:59 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

It seems so bizarre to me that he doesn't make her drive. I'm already stalking the driver's ed site to get Carrot in a class next summer right after he hits 15.

For real! I didn't want to learn to drive either. My dad said tough shit, I'm not your chauffeur. I finally got my license at 17. He also bought me a beater car to drive. I did the same with the girls.

[TheOtherMe]

Oct 30, 2024 10:05:13 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Oct 30, 2024 9:51:26 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

They do and my guess is Mister is not happy with your decision, which is the correct decision.

She is a spoiled, entitled brat and he and her mother have enabled it.  She has to adult at some point and since she quit college, it's now.

I’m sure he’s not happy with me for saying no. But if it’s okay for her to pretend I don’t exist even when she walks right past me when she comes in the house, then pretend I don’t exist when she needs something. 

I don’t want to start my day being trapped in the car with her and all of her negative energy anyway.

Uh oh, he just got back home to take her…

That didn't come out the way I intended, Pink.  I was trying to say your decision is the correct decision.  I am firmly with you on this.

[andi9899]

Oct 30, 2024 12:06:09 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Oct 30, 2024 10:16:59 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

It seems so bizarre to me that he doesn't make her drive. I'm already stalking the driver's ed site to get Carrot in a class next summer right after he hits 15.

Depending on costs, it might not seem all that bizarre.

Drivers ed is just about 700 here. That's for the classroom to get the permit and then the 12 hours of observation/instruction.

Then of course, there's the costs of having a car, insurance, gas, and all that.

My lightly used (aka, 5 year old grandma car with 30K miles on it) was still 20K. DS's junker truck he bought was still 4K. He now owns a 2011 car with 60K on it and paid 10K for it.

If you don't have a friend of a friend that can give you a 20 year old car with 150K miles or more on it that you can still trust...it's expensive.

And then you need to balance the costs with need. I know it's a need for you for Carrot.

Where I work, they strongly suggest you take public transportation, because there is 0 parking available, and if you can get it, it is expensive. The daily lot rate is $15. We can either pay for me to park for a year, or we can go on a 4-night get away as our big summer family vacation. We can't do both.

The kids live a mile from school. There are busses that go past their school and our house.

The kids could walk/bike to their jobs in 10 minutes.

I am very hard pressed to say that it's worth it to spend several hundred a month so that the kids can save 15-20 minutes over the course of a week.  I honestly can't find a justification for that, especially given that DD1, while taking 5 AP courses this year, still can find the time to binge watch tv a few times a week.

If we were rural, it would be different.

Mister has plenty of money though. I mean, I know he doesn't have endless funds, but he seems to do pretty ok in the money department. He's just enabling her.

[andi9899]

Oct 30, 2024 13:41:15 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Oct 30, 2024 12:49:57 GMT -5 NoNamePerson said:

Anybody want some meatloaf.  

I apparently do not pay attention AT ALL because it wasn't until last year I finally got that scene.

ETA: I was also well into my 30s before I had my mom walk me through why they are dancing around with saran wrap during Greased Lightning.

Why? I never understood that either. The saran wrap thing, that is.

[andi9899]

I bought one of those tiered shelving things for my shower in my bedroom last night. Guess what I found in the linen closet at the apartment. Oh well, I like the one I ordered better.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 30, 2024 15:13:52 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Oct 30, 2024 13:41:15 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I apparently do not pay attention AT ALL because it wasn't until last year I finally got that scene.

ETA: I was also well into my 30s before I had my mom walk me through why they are dancing around with saran wrap during Greased Lightning.

Why? I never understood that either. The saran wrap thing, that is.

Makeshift condoms.  

[TheOtherMe]

Oct 30, 2024 11:40:13 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Oct 30, 2024 11:29:22 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

They can take drivers Ed at 14.5 here. Still can't drive till 15, but I was late getting ds signed up.

They can here too, but I figured if they couldn't take the written test until 15 anyhow, (and Carrot is going to be gone the entire month following his 15th birthday as well), that it was better to have the class as close to the testing day as possible instead of having a 6 month gap between class and test. 

I have no idea on costs aside from driver's ed is not offered in school like it was in the Dark Ages.

My great niece loves to drive.  She took driver's ed the first summer she could.  She had to wait over a year to get her license.  She always wanted to go places with the family during that time so she could drive.  

The car she got to drive to work was the one her brother had driven.  It originated with my parents.  When they were done with it, it was given to my sister.  When she was done with it, her youngest son drove it.  It then went to great nephew when he got his license.  He didn't care about driving until he got a girlfriend.  

Their dad fixed the ancient car up and I think I was told they had to pay for the cost of the insurance.  Those two kids have both worked since 14 and do put in a lot of hours.

The great nephew is in his second year at Iowa State.  He has now bought his own car with his earnings.  He was able to work 39 hours a week in high school at fast food and get good enough grades to get in college.  I don't know his actual grades.  He didn't flunk out his first year and he came home every weekend because his girlfriend was still in high school.  He also worked at the fast food place on the weekend.

Now the great niece works two jobs.  She works fast food and at a horse place.  At the horse place, she works in exchange for riding time, so she doesn't get any cash.  Her boyfriend is a year older than her.  He graduates this year and I have no idea of what his plans are.  

She also babysits for her uncle and those 2 kids.  Don't know if they pay her.  She dog sits for them, too.  

There is no public transportation here, so that is not an option.

[andi9899]

I finally got all the food out of the pantry at the apartment. I have an unusually large amount of food for just one person. Guess I just need to get produce when I go to Aldi tomorrow.

I need to make room in the chest freezer since I'm hosting Thanksgiving here. I guess I'm cooking tonight. I don't know what, but I'm cooking.

[TheOtherMe]

chiver78  Your dental experience of yesterday made me remember my Mohs surgery.  

I was advised to have a driver even with the novacain block because the face swells so fast and so bad.  I did do that and it was swollen enough by the time I got home that I couldn't see very well because of the swelling. I really don't like asking for rides but I had no choice.  

The surgeon told me to let him know when I could feel again and he would give me more shots.  Thankfully he got all of the cancer with the first go round or he would have had to do a lot more novacain.  

I wish I had asked for some kind of relaxant beforehand in pill form.  I ended up paying for laughing gas, which is not covered by insurance.

[lurkyloo]

Oct 30, 2024 13:41:15 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Oct 30, 2024 12:49:57 GMT -5 NoNamePerson said:

Anybody want some meatloaf.  

I apparently do not pay attention AT ALL because it wasn't until last year I finally got that scene.

ETA: I was also well into my 30s before I had my mom walk me through why they are dancing around with saran wrap during Greased Lightning.

I just had to Google this    Teenagers gonna teenage. Or 30yo’s gonna 30, if you’re gonna get technical on the ages of those actors   

Also, the Saran wrap thing does NOT sound comfortable or fun 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 30, 2024 15:17:00 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Oct 30, 2024 11:40:13 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

They can here too, but I figured if they couldn't take the written test until 15 anyhow, (and Carrot is going to be gone the entire month following his 15th birthday as well), that it was better to have the class as close to the testing day as possible instead of having a 6 month gap between class and test. 

I have no idea on costs aside from driver's ed is not offered in school like it was in the Dark Ages.

My great niece loves to drive.  She took driver's ed the first summer she could.  She had to wait over a year to get her license.  She always wanted to go places with the family during that time so she could drive.  

The car she got to drive to work was the one her brother had driven.  It originated with my parents.  When they were done with it, it was given to my sister.  When she was done with it, her youngest son drove it.  It then went to great nephew when he got his license.  He didn't care about driving until he got a girlfriend.  

Their dad fixed the ancient car up and I think I was told they had to pay for the cost of the insurance.  Those two kids have both worked since 14 and do put in a lot of hours.

The great nephew is in his second year at Iowa State.  He has now bought his own car with his earnings.  He was able to work 39 hours a week in high school at fast food and get good enough grades to get in college.  I don't know his actual grades.  He didn't flunk out his first year and he came home every weekend because his girlfriend was still in high school.  He also worked at the fast food place on the weekend.

Now the great niece works two jobs.  She works fast food and at a horse place.  At the horse place, she works in exchange for riding time, so she doesn't get any cash.  Her boyfriend is a year older than her.  He graduates this year and I have no idea of what his plans are.  

She also babysits for her uncle and those 2 kids.  Don't know if they pay her.  She dog sits for them, too.  

There is no public transportation here, so that is not an option.

It's around $500 give or take here in Council Bluffs.  We decided to go the route where she logs X amount of hours with us instead.  She has to drive a certain amount during the day, the night and in certain weather conditions.  We got two years to get it done.  She's already completed the night driving part.

She will probably get my car.  She had the idea we were going to get her a new car I have no idea where the hell she got that idea from because I never said anything about her getting a new car.  The Impala is a solid commuter car and would do her just fine in college. 

I told her you want a car with a car payment you'll have to get a job to help pay for it because I want you having skin in the game.  I know too many people who took for granted the cars their parents' got them and wrecked them.

Besides if anyone got a "new" car it would be me!

My first car was an $800 1999 Ford Taurus.  I drove it for 11 years.  Had to get rid of it when the break lines rusted out. . .while I was driving.  That was one of the few times the practice simulations in Driver's Ed came in handy.

After that I drove my dad's 2005 Impala which I paid $1500 for.  Got about 5 years out of that before it also rusted out.

My current 2012 Impala is the first car I ever bought myself and had a payment on.

Dh now has his dad's truck so we're trying to figure out what to do with the Nissan.  At t he moment the plan is Gwen will drive my car and I'll take the Nissan.  But that is after we replace the doors AND I want the car detailed because DH trashed the inside of it.  DH has allowed the kids to eat in his car and has driven the dogs all over the place.  It shows.

I still haven't figured out how Gwen managed to spill what seems like half a gallon of nacho cheese in the backseat of DH's car when we went to Des Moines last year.

[jerseygirl]

Oct 30, 2024 15:05:01 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

I've been playing with the idea of changing up our Thanksgiving meal.  I love all the traditional foods but that makes no sense for just 2 people with a quite small fridge/freezer.  Nor does hours of cooking and a long clean-up make sense either.  I talked to DH about it today and he's totally onboard with something I'm calling "grazing all day" which will allow us to watch the parade and some football and enjoy good food without excess work.  Some things will be bought and some made at home.

This is what I have so far:

    Stuffed mushrooms (from Aldi, bake in oven for 20 minutes)
    Bacon-wrapped Brussels sprouts with maple syrup glaze (make at home)
    Spinach/artichoke dip from local restaurant with crostini
    Jumbo shrimp cocktail (make at home)
    Baba ghanoush and pita bread (Whole Foods)
    Kofta skewers (from Whole Foods, bake in oven or grill as weather allows)
    Tres leches cake portions (local bakery)

Ideas

Like this idea . We’re having thanksgiving early November because of family schedules. So it will be just jerseyguy and me for actual Thanksgiving.
We do this on New Year’s Day even if we have guests
What about smoked salmon also we have that New Year’s Day

[andi9899]

Didn't someone recently have their air ducts cleaned? I'm wondering how much it was. Stanley Steemer won't give me a ballpark over the phone.

[minnesotapaintlady]

Drivers ed is currently $415 here, which kind of surprises me because I'm pretty sure that's around what I paid for older son 7 years ago. Carrot thinks he's going to learn in the Camry...the 27 year old Camry that I bought his brother 6 years ago for $500.  I am not 100% certain it will be around. We'll see.

[greenthumb59]

Oct 30, 2024 15:49:00 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Didn't someone recently have their air ducts cleaned? I'm wondering how much it was. Stanley Steemer won't give me a ballpark over the phone.

I had ours done about two years ago.  This guy charged by the number of registers in the house.  Our registers are in the ceiling, so he had a ladder to schlep around and take the register on and off. 

We have 11 registers and it was just over $500.  I'd never had this done before - we have lived here nearly 30 years - and they were dusty!!  I was hoping this cleaning would cut down on the musty smell in the house.  Alas, no, that still comes and goes.

Andi you could have them also clear your dryer vent.  It doesn't sound like the prior owner did a lot of maintenance.  I bet it needs it!

[lurkyloo]

Oct 30, 2024 15:05:01 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

I've been playing with the idea of changing up our Thanksgiving meal.  I love all the traditional foods but that makes no sense for just 2 people with a quite small fridge/freezer.  Nor does hours of cooking and a long clean-up make sense either.  I talked to DH about it today and he's totally onboard with something I'm calling "grazing all day" which will allow us to watch the parade and some football and enjoy good food without excess work.  Some things will be bought and some made at home.

This is what I have so far:

    Stuffed mushrooms (from Aldi, bake in oven for 20 minutes)
    Bacon-wrapped Brussels sprouts with maple syrup glaze (make at home)
    Spinach/artichoke dip from local restaurant with crostini
    Jumbo shrimp cocktail (make at home)
    Baba ghanoush and pita bread (Whole Foods)
    Kofta skewers (from Whole Foods, bake in oven or grill as weather allows)
    Tres leches cake portions (local bakery)

Ideas

We always had a platter of crudités and cheese and crackers sitting around for noshing.  Not very exciting but low erfort.  I’m a fan of mini quiches, which can be low effort as long as you buy them 

[toomuchreality]

I saw an ad for a Digiorno Thanksgiving pizza today.

[chiver78]

Oct 30, 2024 15:49:00 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Didn't someone recently have their air ducts cleaned? I'm wondering how much it was. Stanley Steemer won't give me a ballpark over the phone.

me! there's a calculator on the website, but youll need details on your system. it was a flat fee for the furnace, $25/vent for the ducts, and a couple other things. my house was $800ish, I've got 12 vents. the guys were here about 3h.

[chiver78]

Oct 30, 2024 16:10:19 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

I saw an ad for a Digiorno Thanksgiving pizza today.

🤢