raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Oct 3, 2024 15:38:04 GMT -5
what is renting like? I know it is not always ideal and comes with its own headaches but if it would mean giving you breathing room and space to figure everything else out it might be worth considering. What happened here is that “investors”, many of them from out of town, bought a lot of the houses here soon after the pandemic started, because housing was pretty cheap here, compared to other parts of the country. The demand drove prices up, and many “regular” folks couldn’t compete with the cash offers from the investors, and what they were willing to pay. A lot of the homes that investors bought, were turned into rental properties, and the cost to rent got ridiculous too. Earlier this year, Mrs. T was keeping me up to date with her search for somewhere in the area to rent, after she decided her marriage was over. The places she looked at that cost up to $1800/month, were trash and not being taken care of. Her income is more than what I live on, and more than what I think my income in retirement will be, and she couldn’t even find anywhere decent to rent. $1800/month may be peanuts in other parts of the country, but until the pandemic, $1800/month went a long way for housing, whether it was buying or renting a nice house in a nice area, or living in an upscale apartment. So renting is problematic too these days, as far as cost. I feel that a lot.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 15:56:32 GMT -5
The Dr. I went to today, prescribed antibiotics. She said there is clear fluid in my ears, but they aren’t red. In the past, I haven’t always taken the antibiotics when they were prescribed for my sinus issues, but I’m taking them this time, because I don’t want any extra issues when I fly next week.
And once again there was a conversation about my blood pressure. Last week when it was taken, at first it was 147 over 89 or something, I don’t remember the exact bottom number, but it was high 80’s. It was taken again about 5 minutes later and it was 120something over 84. So I asked what is considered normal when the Doctor brought it up, and she said that the guidelines have changed and now the high side of “normal” is 120/85.
Today it was 127/84, and this Doctor said it was high and asked if I take blood pressure medicine. I asked her what is considered normal, and she said max 120/60. My bottom number has NEVER been under 60, and it wasn’t until the last few years that any Doctor has said anything about it. But that’s not even what the last Doctor said the guidelines for “normal” are. The Doctor today didn’t take it again before I left, she just left it at it being too high.
Even my PCP who I saw for over 20 years, until she retired a couple years ago, never talked about my blood pressure. She had no problem bringing things to my attention and even “fussed” at me regularly about some things, but never my blood pressure. But these last few years, my blood pressure has been all over the place when it’s taken, sometimes it’s high when they first take it, sometimes so high that the nurse taking it has asked if I was taking medicine for it, but every single time that’s happened, if they did it again before I left, it was lower. But I still don’t recall the bottom number ever being under 60, even when I was seeing my previous PCP.
Idk what to do with this information. I am confused about whether it’s really too high or not. We have a blood pressure cuff somewhere in the house that I can use to take it regularly, but who knows where exactly it is. I guess I need to find it and use it.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Oct 3, 2024 16:16:12 GMT -5
I thought normal was 120/80, always has been? Mine runs 117/55 or lower at times, my moms was low too. I worry about it getting to low.
They say mine is excellent, I have no idea.
At night I am having pain in the thumb area of my hands, shooting pain. Also in my ankles, so far its not happening for a long time but long enough its starting to bother me. I'm afraid it will progress.
I have an appointment for DD, need to get one for me too, to get docs as I will need med refills.
My babies went out for an hour or so, fairly cool out there and both came back in. Smoke is snuggled beside me.
My phone is screwed up or something. I turned it off to clear it and it says its updating has been for an hour or two but nothing has updated. I can't get out of it. Emailed hubs, tried to son and he must have changed his email address. I may have to drive over there later, I really need it today. It also has English and Chinese, never seen an update like that before.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Oct 3, 2024 16:26:08 GMT -5
I have all but one set of brackets off the windows. Hard to do as I can't find hubs drill. And with the damn phone screwed up, I'm stuck, but I will get it, then take the curtains down and paint around the windows, will be ready to paint the walls. I think I will do all the while trim on things in herel
I think the timer deal on the one on my porch light is set wrong, its on during part of the day and not coming on at night, have to get a flashlight to see the area to change it.
I need to fix 2 more lights out there, clean them and put in new bulbs. So many things like that had been let go, neither light on the back porch worked, had not been cleaned in forever nor new bulbs in.
Ok, back to work, its late and I have not done much today.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Oct 3, 2024 16:32:49 GMT -5
Pink, do you and mister ever sit down and have a heart to heart talk? It kind of seems to me each of you hold to much in. I don't know would it help to clear the air. Best not to do it when anyone is irritated. Long ago hubs finally said you may think I know what you are thinking but I don't. He said you have to tell me what you want and what you are thinking about as I have no idea. Men are definitely different. But we all need to talk and talk a lot with our spouse or whomever. It's hard to live together but it can be done if both parties are willing to talk it out. You may be way beyond that but there is so much invested by both of you maybe worth a try.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Oct 3, 2024 17:04:55 GMT -5
The Dr. I went to today, prescribed antibiotics. She said there is clear fluid in my ears, but they aren’t red. In the past, I haven’t always taken the antibiotics when they were prescribed for my sinus issues, but I’m taking them this time, because I don’t want any extra issues when I fly next week. And once again there was a conversation about my blood pressure. Last week when it was taken, at first it was 147 over 89 or something, I don’t remember the exact bottom number, but it was high 80’s. It was taken again about 5 minutes later and it was 120something over 84. So I asked what is considered normal when the Doctor brought it up, and she said that the guidelines have changed and now the high side of “normal” is 120/85. Today it was 127/84, and this Doctor said it was high and asked if I take blood pressure medicine. I asked her what is considered normal, and she said max 120/60. My bottom number has NEVER been under 60, and it wasn’t until the last few years that any Doctor has said anything about it. But that’s not even what the last Doctor said the guidelines for “normal” are. The Doctor today didn’t take it again before I left, she just left it at it being too high. Even my PCP who I saw for over 20 years, until she retired a couple years ago, never talked about my blood pressure. She had no problem bringing things to my attention and even “fussed” at me regularly about some things, but never my blood pressure. But these last few years, my blood pressure has been all over the place when it’s taken, sometimes it’s high when they first take it, sometimes so high that the nurse taking it has asked if I was taking medicine for it, but every single time that’s happened, if they did it again before I left, it was lower. But I still don’t recall the bottom number ever being under 60, even when I was seeing my previous PCP. Idk what to do with this information. I am confused about whether it’s really too high or not. We have a blood pressure cuff somewhere in the house that I can use to take it regularly, but who knows where exactly it is. I guess I need to find it and use it. When I used to work out mine was always like 90/60 and my understanding is my BP was low. It is higher now as I don't work out anymore. last Dr visits were 126/64, 120/68, 95/61. I think they mentioned it was a bit high last visit (126/64, but don't think they were too concerned). I used Google just to verify: www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/high-blood-pressure/in-depth/blood-pressure/art-20050982#:~:text=This%20blood%20pressure%20chart%20can%20help%20you%20figureIt doesn't look like it was that high.
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Cheesy FL-Vol
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Post by Cheesy FL-Vol on Oct 3, 2024 17:32:09 GMT -5
I'm thinking seriously of a Kia Soul, son had one for years, good little car. I've had 3 of them and they were good cars, surprisingly roomy with good cargo space too. I'm probably going with a KIA Telluride or maybe Sorrento because I want something that sits higher with more power and they know have them with AWD which is a must-have for me. We fell in love with the Telluride when we were visiting family in PNW in fall 2022. My uncle has one. However when we were looking at new cars last spring, we narrowed down to the Telluride and the Explorer. We opted for the Explorer. We are disappointed with it, even though we have had them before.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 17:34:40 GMT -5
Pink, do you and mister ever sit down and have a heart to heart talk? It kind of seems to me each of you hold to much in. I don't know would it help to clear the air. Best not to do it when anyone is irritated. Long ago hubs finally said you may think I know what you are thinking but I don't. He said you have to tell me what you want and what you are thinking about as I have no idea. Men are definitely different. But we all need to talk and talk a lot with our spouse or whomever. It's hard to live together but it can be done if both parties are willing to talk it out. You may be way beyond that but there is so much invested by both of you maybe worth a try. I stopped trying to have conversations with him, maybe a couple months ago. It got to be too frustrating because he has formed an opinion of me that I am tired of fighting and I got tired of him not listening to me. So because I stopped initiating conversations, now we don’t talk at all about anything meaningful. I don’t even tell him “little” things like how I’ve been feeling like crap for the last week. Or bigger things like how I feel blank inside now. I just let him think whatever he wants to think, since that’s become what he does anyway, regardless of what I say. He use to be my safe person that I could talk to about anything. Now he’s not, so I don’t talk to him. Which leads me to another issue I’m dealing with, I often feel lonely. I didn’t really feel lonely all the years that I was single, because if I wanted some attention and company, I could get it whenever I wanted to. Now I can’t, because I have made an agreement and live with someone that doesn’t pay me any attention, and my morals keep me from getting attention and company elsewhere. Even as a single woman, I’ve always loved men, even when I didn’t feel like being bothered with one of them. So that part of my current situation feels weird to me, because I still kind of like Mister, and definitely still love him, but I feel lonely even though we share a home. I love music enough that I pretty much have a song for everything lol. The song that came to mind while I was typing this post was “Comfort Of A Man” by Stephanie Mills.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Oct 3, 2024 17:43:04 GMT -5
My dad turns 69 today. I just wished him a happy 75th birthday. He replied with "just think next month you turn 47." I'm turning 46.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Oct 3, 2024 17:45:31 GMT -5
I have all but one set of brackets off the windows. Hard to do as I can't find hubs drill. And with the damn phone screwed up, I'm stuck, but I will get it, then take the curtains down and paint around the windows, will be ready to paint the walls. I think I will do all the while trim on things in herel I think the timer deal on the one on my porch light is set wrong, its on during part of the day and not coming on at night, have to get a flashlight to see the area to change it. I need to fix 2 more lights out there, clean them and put in new bulbs. So many things like that had been let go, neither light on the back porch worked, had not been cleaned in forever nor new bulbs in.Ok, back to work, its late and I have not done much today. You told us here that the sellers of your current home were 86 years old and disabled by blindness and dementia, yet you constantly complain about the condition of the home you bought from them. According to your posts here, you and your husband are 78 years old and have many infirmities and health challenges. I can't help but wonder how clean and well maintained your house will be at a future point if you two face a similar situation. You already complain that you have to paint because your husband's eyesight is poor and he misses spots. I hope your and your husband's future health allows you to maintain your property to the standards you require.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Oct 3, 2024 17:46:38 GMT -5
My dad turns 69 today. I just wished him a happy 75th birthday. He replied with "just think next month you turn 47." I'm turning 46.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Oct 3, 2024 17:50:18 GMT -5
Pink, do you and mister ever sit down and have a heart to heart talk? It kind of seems to me each of you hold to much in. I don't know would it help to clear the air. Best not to do it when anyone is irritated. Long ago hubs finally said you may think I know what you are thinking but I don't. He said you have to tell me what you want and what you are thinking about as I have no idea. Men are definitely different. But we all need to talk and talk a lot with our spouse or whomever. It's hard to live together but it can be done if both parties are willing to talk it out. You may be way beyond that but there is so much invested by both of you maybe worth a try. I stopped trying to have conversations with him, maybe a couple months ago. It got to be too frustrating because he has formed an opinion of me that I am tired of fighting and I got tired of him not listening to me. So because I stopped initiating conversations, now we don’t talk at all about anything meaningful. I don’t even tell him “little” things like how I’ve been feeling like crap for the last week. Or bigger things like how I feel blank inside now. I just let him think whatever he wants to think, since that’s become what he does anyway, regardless of what I say. He use to be my safe person that I could talk to about anything. Now he’s not, so I don’t talk to him. Which leads me to another issue I’m dealing with, I often feel lonely. I didn’t really feel lonely all the years that I was single, because if I wanted some attention and company, I could get it whenever I wanted to. Now I can’t, because I have made an agreement and live with someone that doesn’t pay me any attention, and my morals keep me from getting attention and company elsewhere. Even as a single woman, I’ve always loved men, even when I didn’t feel like being bothered with one of them. So that part of my current situation feels weird to me, because I still kind of like Mister, and definitely still love him, but I feel lonely even though we share a home. I love music enough that I pretty much have a song for everything lol. The song that came to mind while I was typing this post was “Comfort Of A Man” by Stephanie Mills. Hugs pink. I wish that made it better.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Oct 3, 2024 17:50:33 GMT -5
My dad turns 69 today. I just wished him a happy 75th birthday. He replied with "just think next month you turn 47." I'm turning 46. My dad and I are basically the same person and have the same sense of humor. It can be pretty funny sometimes.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Oct 3, 2024 17:56:11 GMT -5
Pink, I hear you on the housing. I have wanted to move back to Colorado for so long and it will never happen because I can't afford it.
Like you, I could not buy this house at it's current value. I am not interested in working part time at my age any more. I used that money to travel. It's not going to happen when it comes to work.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 18:01:40 GMT -5
I went next door and asked Mrs. T to forgive me for what seemed to me like a weird and borderline creepy question… what size bra does she wear. I had a bag of several bras I’d ordered from Savage Fenty 2 or 3 years ago, that were too small for me even though they were supposedly the size I wore at the time.
Some of them still had the tags on them, the ones that didn’t, I’d tried on, but never wore, because they were too small. I told her they’d just been sitting unused in a drawer for at least 2 years, and I prefer to give them to somebody I know, that could wear them, than get rid of them some other kind of way. They are all lacy, see through bras that are probably more pretty than supportive, but idk for sure, because none of them fit me.
For every bra I took over, I have matching panties that I never wore either, but I felt weird enough about the bras, and never mentioned the panties. When I was going through the drawer, I put the panties to the side, even though most of them were still wrapped in the original plastic packaging.
I kept telling her that the bras were all brand new and had never been worn, even the ones I took the tags off of before I tried them on, and showed her the details that showed they had never even been washed, and she chuckled and was finally like stop it, it’s good, and thank you.
I told her to try them on at her leisure, and she is welcome to keep whatever fits her. If any of them don’t fit, I will try to figure out somebody else I can give them to.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Oct 3, 2024 18:19:06 GMT -5
The phone interview for the auditor job went good.
IDK. It doesn't require a medical background though that would surely help.
I can learn medical terminology.
I think for me it would be an interesting job.
It is mostly remote it sounds like which would also be an awesome change.
I'm so sick and burnt out being in person all the time after COVID.
We'll see. Pay would be the same which I'm fine with in exchange for this job.
Haven't heard a peep from that last job I interviewed for. Not disappointed but I am getting rather sick of the ghosting since often interviewees are expected to adhere to strict communication expectations.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Oct 3, 2024 18:27:51 GMT -5
The phone interview for the auditor job went good. IDK. It doesn't require a medical background though that would surely help. I can learn medical terminology. I think for me it would be an interesting job. It is mostly remote it sounds like which would also be an awesome change. I'm so sick and burnt out being in person all the time after COVID. We'll see. Pay would be the same which I'm fine with in exchange for this job. Haven't heard a peep from that last job I interviewed for. Not disappointed but I am getting rather sick of the ghosting since often interviewees are expected to adhere to strict communication expectations. Good luck!
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 19:07:39 GMT -5
When I was on my way to the doctor today, I got an alert from the cameras and saw that Mister had just come home.
I called him, thinking something must be wrong, because he doesn’t leave work like that. He said he’d come to take YD to a job interview.
When we talked again after I’d left the doctor and he was back at work, he said that her interview went well and if she gets the job, she will be working Monday-Friday, 11am to 4pm, so transportation will have to be figured out.
I want to see what that will look like. YD has felt no need to get a driver’s license, despite her parents encouraging her to, so even though we have a car lot worth of cars, she can’t drive any of them. Mister has also entertained the thought of buying her a car, and passed up a few opportunities, because she doesn’t even have a driver’s license.
When she was in high school, she called me sometimes to pick her up from school, and other times, I took her to school on my days off work, so she wouldn’t have to stand at the bus stop when it was cold outside.
I am not at all interested in helping get her back and forth to a job on my days off work, which happen to be week days, after everything that has happened and there have been no conversations with me about, and how she still does not say hello or good morning to me unless I say it first.
As far as I am concerned, she can ride the bus, since I think it does run on the big street outside our neighborhood, even though I don’t know the schedule. The potential job is less than 2 miles down the big street from where we live, so if public transportation doesn’t work, she can walk. She is young and healthy, and walking a mile or 2 won’t kill her, or even harm her.
Aside from my days off from work, which are Monday and Tuesday, Mister and I are both at work, miles away, when she would need to be at work and get off work if she gets this job.
I do feel like she needs to work, since she is not in college, but I’m not trying to help her get back and forth if that becomes an issue. Not without some conversations happening first, and her adjusting her bad attitude.
I’m just saying what is already in my mind as far as that goes.
I am reminded of what somebody I know that said many years ago IRT his child that was being an asshole and doing stupid shit, you will probably need me, before I need you.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Oct 3, 2024 19:16:37 GMT -5
I was leaving earlier and was spotted by the cutest puppy ever. She was so sweet. There were a couple of kids outside and they said it wasn't their dog. I called the number on her tag and it was the people two doors down from me. Their kid left the dog outside. She was so cute!
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 19:29:33 GMT -5
The phone interview for the auditor job went good. IDK. It doesn't require a medical background though that would surely help. I can learn medical terminology. I think for me it would be an interesting job. It is mostly remote it sounds like which would also be an awesome change. I'm so sick and burnt out being in person all the time after COVID.We'll see. Pay would be the same which I'm fine with in exchange for this job. Haven't heard a peep from that last job I interviewed for. Not disappointed but I am getting rather sick of the ghosting since often interviewees are expected to adhere to strict communication expectations. I really think that the bolded was the beginning of me going sideways, the stress of being an “essential” employee and going to work, while my coworkers were getting so sick from COVID that they were in the hospital for months, or DIED. I can name at least a dozen coworkers that died from COVID, and many more people that I knew or knew of, that died from it, and that is not counting all the other people I worked with or knew, that also died due to other reasons during the last 4 years. It was a lot for me, all of the deaths, and that was even before I got to the stuff with Mister’s parents and them both dying last year. COVID most definitely took a toll on my mental health, because I had to go to work even when it seemed like my coworkers were dying left and right, which made me feel like I needed to stay away from my own family to try to protect them from whatever I might have been exposed to, and at the same time, I was fighting about extra people being in my home, that could potentially bring the virus to me, even if I managed to not get it at work.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Oct 3, 2024 19:34:00 GMT -5
My class was canceled today was a bummer I was looking forward to it.
I'll go to the Monday class. If it is canceled too I might pick another option.
I wanted to take the other dance class but Gwen thinks it will kill me. I could try it and see.
In the meantime I'm going to try step class tomorrow.
I'm all over the place at the moment.
Excerise is the goal though at the moment I can commit once I find a regular class.
I got Abby signed up for youth fitness so she can start using the gym with us.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Oct 3, 2024 19:38:58 GMT -5
I got burnt out being considered disposable and the yelling at us about being essential and record company profits we didn't see penny of.
I got sick and they tried to order me to not get tested because if I had it the lab would shut down.
Meanwhile they bent over backwards for the office people and we had to do A LOT of their on site work. Couldn't risk exposure!
Yeah fuck that. I want to be an office person.
We lab people all know who is truly important in a company. There is no putting that genie back in the bottle.
It's why you see people leaving the service industry in droves too.
You can only crap on people so much.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Oct 3, 2024 20:12:36 GMT -5
I don't know if it's in my head or what but I smell poop and I can't find it. Jackson did have tummy trouble today and he pooped in the same spot in the kitchen today but it's not there and when I cleaned it up I threw it away outside. I'm doing so much cleaning this weekend.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Oct 3, 2024 20:28:48 GMT -5
We sat on the deck this afternoon and admired a family of four black vultures floating overhead. I realize many feel vultures are a yuk bird but they are actually pretty amazing creatures
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Oct 3, 2024 20:45:57 GMT -5
When I was on my way to the doctor today, I got an alert from the cameras and saw that Mister had just come home. I called him, thinking something must be wrong, because he doesn’t leave work like that. He said he’d come to take YD to a job interview. When we talked again after I’d left the doctor and he was back at work, he said that her interview went well and if she gets the job, she will be working Monday-Friday, 11am to 4pm, so transportation will have to be figured out. I want to see what that will look like. YD has felt no need to get a driver’s license, despite her parents encouraging her to, so even though we have a car lot worth of cars, she can’t drive any of them. Mister has also entertained the thought of buying her a car, and passed up a few opportunities, because she doesn’t even have a driver’s license. When she was in high school, she called me sometimes to pick her up from school, and other times, I took her to school on my days off work, so she wouldn’t have to stand at the bus stop when it was cold outside. I am not at all interested in helping get her back and forth to a job on my days off work, which happen to be week days, after everything that has happened and there have been no conversations with me about, and how she still does not say hello or good morning to me unless I say it first. As far as I am concerned, she can ride the bus, since I think it does run on the big street outside our neighborhood, even though I don’t know the schedule. The potential job is less than 2 miles down the big street from where we live, so if public transportation doesn’t work, she can walk. She is young and healthy, and walking a mile or 2 won’t kill her, or even harm her. Aside from my days off from work, which are Monday and Tuesday, Mister and I are both at work, miles away, when she would need to be at work and get off work if she gets this job. I do feel like she needs to work, since she is not in college, but I’m not trying to help her get back and forth if that becomes an issue. Not without some conversations happening first, and her adjusting her bad attitude. I’m just saying what is already in my mind as far as that goes. I am reminded of what somebody I know that said many years ago IRT his child that was being an asshole and doing stupid shit, you will probably need me, before I need you. I would be very clear that I am not willing to take her anywhere just because she does want to get a license. Especially 2 miles away. She can walk. I don't do favors for people with no respect.
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Pink Cashmere
Junior Associate
Joined: Sept 24, 2022 16:18:40 GMT -5
Posts: 5,282
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 20:46:11 GMT -5
I got burnt out being considered disposable and the yelling at us about being essential and record company profits we didn't see penny of. I got sick and they tried to order me to not get tested because if I had it the lab would shut down. Meanwhile they bent over backwards for the office people and we had to do A LOT of their on site work. Couldn't risk exposure! Yeah fuck that. I want to be an office person. We lab people all know who is truly important in a company. There is no putting that genie back in the bottle. It's why you see people leaving the service industry in droves too. You can only crap on people so much. Yeah, it was a mindfuck for me, being an essential employee, when at the beginning of the pandemic, when even the scientists weren’t sure what was going on, there was often no soap in the bathrooms to wash your hands, which is just a basic thing to not be nasty and spread germs. Our unions had to step up to try to put things in place with my employer, to try to protect us. I 100% believe that if he hadn’t had unions to stand up for us, my employer wouldn’t have given a fuck about us worker bees.
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NastyWoman
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 20:50:37 GMT -5
Posts: 14,863
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Post by NastyWoman on Oct 3, 2024 20:58:32 GMT -5
Today would have been my father's 100th birthday.
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giramomma
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Feb 3, 2011 11:25:27 GMT -5
Posts: 22,133
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Post by giramomma on Oct 3, 2024 21:00:18 GMT -5
OK. We settled on some sort of path forward. Step 1 is test driving a model that I haven't driven to see if I like it. That will narrow down options. I'm giving this whole thing until the end of October to make a decision. DH is OK with some financing, which ever way I go. Of course, if I sound like I've tried to think through things reasonably, he is always has no opinion because he trusts my judgement. Which doesn't help when I need someone to point out all the flaws/things I haven't thought of. I told dh I hate that phrase. Supporting me would be talking through options. So. I did push DH a little bit about it. I was like, you know, I really value your opinion. I don't want you to be like "oh, we can eat, have the roof over our head, AND retire at 60. We're good." And then he told me he wants me to be happy. And if it means getting a new car, so be it. TBH. I need to sit with that. It's pretty profound that another adult related to me wants me to be happy in a frivolous way. And articulated it. And probably meant it.
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NastyWoman
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 20:50:37 GMT -5
Posts: 14,863
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Post by NastyWoman on Oct 3, 2024 21:07:19 GMT -5
When I was on my way to the doctor today, I got an alert from the cameras and saw that Mister had just come home. I called him, thinking something must be wrong, because he doesn’t leave work like that. He said he’d come to take YD to a job interview. When we talked again after I’d left the doctor and he was back at work, he said that her interview went well and if she gets the job, she will be working Monday-Friday, 11am to 4pm, so transportation will have to be figured out. I want to see what that will look like. YD has felt no need to get a driver’s license, despite her parents encouraging her to, so even though we have a car lot worth of cars, she can’t drive any of them. Mister has also entertained the thought of buying her a car, and passed up a few opportunities, because she doesn’t even have a driver’s license. When she was in high school, she called me sometimes to pick her up from school, and other times, I took her to school on my days off work, so she wouldn’t have to stand at the bus stop when it was cold outside. I am not at all interested in helping get her back and forth to a job on my days off work, which happen to be week days, after everything that has happened and there have been no conversations with me about, and how she still does not say hello or good morning to me unless I say it first. As far as I am concerned, she can ride the bus, since I think it does run on the big street outside our neighborhood, even though I don’t know the schedule. The potential job is less than 2 miles down the big street from where we live, so if public transportation doesn’t work, she can walk. She is young and healthy, and walking a mile or 2 won’t kill her, or even harm her. Aside from my days off from work, which are Monday and Tuesday, Mister and I are both at work, miles away, when she would need to be at work and get off work if she gets this job. I do feel like she needs to work, since she is not in college, but I’m not trying to help her get back and forth if that becomes an issue. Not without some conversations happening first, and her adjusting her bad attitude. I’m just saying what is already in my mind as far as that goes. I am reminded of what somebody I know that said many years ago IRT his child that was being an asshole and doing stupid shit, you will probably need me, before I need you. I would be very clear that I am not willing to take her anywhere just because she does want to get a license. Especially 2 miles away. She can walk. I don't do favors for people with no respect. or, if push cones to shove, Mister can adjust his bicycle for her to use for a month or so. After that she can buy her own bike.
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Pink Cashmere
Junior Associate
Joined: Sept 24, 2022 16:18:40 GMT -5
Posts: 5,282
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 3, 2024 21:33:40 GMT -5
I would be very clear that I am not willing to take her anywhere just because she does want to get a license. Especially 2 miles away. She can walk. I don't do favors for people with no respect. or, if push cones to shove Mister can adjust his bicycle for her to use for a month or so. After that she can buy her own bike. I honestly don’t see her going anywhere that somebody doesn’t drive her to, so your post is really funny, and I’m not being funny when I say that. Trying to imagine her walking is funny, trying to imagine her riding a bike is even funnier. I wouldn’t be surprised if she doesn’t even know how to ride a bike. But even if she does, no way would that be an acceptable means of transportation for her.
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