azucena
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Post by azucena on Oct 2, 2024 15:21:03 GMT -5
Azucena, can the girl get emancipated? Requires parental consent in Missouri. Also means teen saying that she's financially independent and might put Medicaid in jeopardy. It's a clusterf$%^.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Oct 2, 2024 15:34:06 GMT -5
We went to Target this morning. DH is absolutely fascinated by the huge variety of products they carry so it takes forever to walk all the aisles. I still need to Amazon 2 items I couldn't find (don't they make baby powder anymore?). I was a very good girl and didn't get any Halloween stuff although some of the skeletons were sooooo tempting. Tomorrow is Aldi and the storage locker for Halloween decor, and Friday is Whole Foods for assorted items Aldi doesn't have. DH is off looking at cars again. He really likes the Genesis but isn't comfortable with the price range so now he's looking at other stuff. I don't care-just buy something! I pointed out that if he buys a cheaper second choice, he'll whine about it for 2-3 years and go back and get the pricier one anyway which will be even pricier then. He wasn't amused and I don't give a squat
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Oct 2, 2024 15:46:14 GMT -5
I like October because of all the horror moves. Not all of them are B movies. Right now I'm watching a Spielberg move...The Haunting. It's an incredibly elaborate set, and stars Liam Neeson. Catherine Zeta Jones, Owen Wilson, and more. I'm enjoying myself. I like those really cheesy 50s "horror" movies like Tarantula where, if you look carefully, you can see the cables move the legs of the giant spider Yeah, those are a hoot!
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Oct 2, 2024 15:51:56 GMT -5
We went to Target this morning. DH is absolutely fascinated by the huge variety of products they carry so it takes forever to walk all the aisles. I still need to Amazon 2 items I couldn't find (don't they make baby powder anymore?). I was a very good girl and didn't get any Halloween stuff although some of the skeletons were sooooo tempting. Tomorrow is Aldi and the storage locker for Halloween decor, and Friday is Whole Foods for assorted items Aldi doesn't have. DH is off looking at cars again. He really likes the Genesis but isn't comfortable with the price range so now he's looking at other stuff. I don't care-just buy something! I pointed out that if he buys a cheaper second choice, he'll whine about it for 2-3 years and go back and get the pricier one anyway which will be even pricier then. He wasn't amused and I don't give a squat Target failed miserably in Canada, especially in Quebec. www.thestar.com/business/target-failed-quebec-too/article_d0c3fc98-9f13-5f9c-9def-12423e1ac0d2.html
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Oct 2, 2024 15:54:16 GMT -5
I couldn't find baby powder anywhere. I think it had to do with baby powder causing cancer. I did find cornstarch baby powder in the pharmacy. It's quite nice.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Oct 2, 2024 17:15:31 GMT -5
I had a black hoodie made with two very colorful skulls, facing opposite directions, on the front, for Halloween. (Think "Day of the Dead" colors)
I love it!
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Oct 2, 2024 17:26:14 GMT -5
We went to Target this morning. DH is absolutely fascinated by the huge variety of products they carry so it takes forever to walk all the aisles. I still need to Amazon 2 items I couldn't find (don't they make baby powder anymore?). I was a very good girl and didn't get any Halloween stuff although some of the skeletons were sooooo tempting. Tomorrow is Aldi and the storage locker for Halloween decor, and Friday is Whole Foods for assorted items Aldi doesn't have. DH is off looking at cars again. He really likes the Genesis but isn't comfortable with the price range so now he's looking at other stuff. I don't care-just buy something! I pointed out that if he buys a cheaper second choice, he'll whine about it for 2-3 years and go back and get the pricier one anyway which will be even pricier then. He wasn't amused and I don't give a squat Because of the cancer issue mostly cornstarch now. I like Gold Bond Body Powder.
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Oct 2, 2024 17:34:44 GMT -5
Having a delicious crab ravioli in a lobster sauce in the hotel while I work. Also ordered a salad, which I will likely not touch. I did not know if I would like the ravioli - I was worried it may be imitation crab and I am a crab snob. It is not and there are delicious chunks of lobster in the sauce.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Oct 2, 2024 17:41:31 GMT -5
We went to Target this morning. DH is absolutely fascinated by the huge variety of products they carry so it takes forever to walk all the aisles. I still need to Amazon 2 items I couldn't find (don't they make baby powder anymore?). I was a very good girl and didn't get any Halloween stuff although some of the skeletons were sooooo tempting. Tomorrow is Aldi and the storage locker for Halloween decor, and Friday is Whole Foods for assorted items Aldi doesn't have. DH is off looking at cars again. He really likes the Genesis but isn't comfortable with the price range so now he's looking at other stuff. I don't care-just buy something! I pointed out that if he buys a cheaper second choice, he'll whine about it for 2-3 years and go back and get the pricier one anyway which will be even pricier then. He wasn't amused and I don't give a squat Target failed miserably in Canada, especially in Quebec. www.thestar.com/business/target-failed-quebec-too/article_d0c3fc98-9f13-5f9c-9def-12423e1ac0d2.htmlThe article references the preference Quebecers and other Canadians have for shopping at specialty stores which is the antithesis of shopping at a retailer like Target or Walmart. I shop Target for precisely that reason-I don't have to traverse miles of Houston's traffic to go to different stores. Today's shopping list was body wash, some type of powder (didn't have), facial tissues, Tide laundry detergent, Dawn dish liquid, sugar scrub, shaving cream, a foot rasp, liquid callus remover (didn't have) and hand/foot masks. We also grabbed some lentils and wine. Plus my Target has relatively accessible parking which my knees appreciate, and excellent security in the parking lot.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Oct 2, 2024 17:54:52 GMT -5
Having a delicious crab ravioli in a lobster sauce in the hotel while I work. Also ordered a salad, which I will likely not touch. I did not know if I would like the ravioli - I was worried it may be imitation crab and I am a crab snob. It is not and there are delicious chunks of lobster in the sauce. Jealous! ENJOY!
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Oct 2, 2024 17:56:14 GMT -5
The article references the preference Quebecers and other Canadians have for shopping at specialty stores which is the antithesis of shopping at a retailer like Target or Walmart. I shop Target for precisely that reason-I don't have to traverse miles of Houston's traffic to go to different stores. Today's shopping list was body wash, some type of powder (didn't have), facial tissues, Tide laundry detergent, Dawn dish liquid, sugar scrub, shaving cream, a foot rasp, liquid callus remover (didn't have) and hand/foot masks. We also grabbed some lentils and wine. Plus my Target has relatively accessible parking which my knees appreciate, and excellent security in the parking lot. Yes. I buy bread and croissants at the patisserie, fresh veggies at the Korean market, and fish at the poissonnerie. Everything is pretty close together, within walking distance. Target didn't take into account Canadian consumers' shopping habits, and it went under.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Oct 2, 2024 17:57:27 GMT -5
My sister mostly shops at Target and Kohl's. She was quite disappointed that Target isn't in Canada because that way she would know exactly what to send her grandson.
At present, she holds his gifts as ransom for them to come visit. It's not working.
I think Canadian Tire has the concept of a little big of everything.
I get sent a weblink to a store for clothes for J. They send me pictures of what I send and he wears them when we FaceTime and he says thank you.
His mother and I feel the same way about people not thanking people for gifts, so it works for us for him to say thank you. The last thing he needs is toys as he is still figuring out different ways to play with his toys since he was about a year old.
He was surprised last week when I told him he was afraid of a small plastic slide when he was about 2. Now he goes down the biggest slide on the playground.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Oct 2, 2024 18:00:22 GMT -5
The new will is signed. I don't know what it cost because they are old fashioned and mail the bill later. I was given a range over the phone. They better not charge me for the redo because he left out 2 things I had told him at our meeting and he wrote down.
Food for this week picked up and food ordered for next week.
Did grocery pick up.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Oct 2, 2024 18:49:57 GMT -5
I have been thinking about what my counselor said yesterday when I told her that I’ve pretty much checked out on my whole life. I told her that I don’t want to deal with anything, I don’t want to talk to anybody, I don’t even want to think about anything.
She said that I still should’ve told Mister what I was feeling, before I checked out. I was like “whyyyyy”, because nothing I say to him seems to matter, so why even frustrate myself by saying anything to him. Long story short, from what I understood, she was saying that I should(ve) told him with no expectation regarding what he would do with the information, and the point was just to express those feelings and get them outside of me.
I guess I didn’t explain well enough what “checking out” means to me. I finally did what I have been asking Mister for a long time, to help me avoid, distancing myself from him. I know myself well enough to know that when I start distancing myself from somebody to try to protect myself (except for my Mom and my children, obviously), in my whole life, there has been no coming back from that and getting things back to the way they were before. That is why when I am at odds with someone I genuinely care about, I tell them how they are hurting me and try to talk with them about the issues, so that when I do finally cut them off, my conscience is clear, knowing that I’d been very clear with them before I got to that point.
I am beyond tired of trying to explain myself to Mister regarding the issues I am having, especially since a lot of my issues have to do with what has happened since I moved into a house with him, and he feels like like fuck all of that, the bottom line is that I should be able to function like a normal person and do everything that “normal” people do.
Part of that is what was instilled in him as a soldier in war zones when he was in the Army, but I determined when I was 16yo that military life was not for me, and I have never been forced to do things and live my life in ways that contradict what is best for me and who I am as a person. But that is what is being asked of me now.
With everything that is going on now, I honestly don’t see me being able to get back to not being a crazy person, living where I live. But I also honestly can’t figure out how to fix that, since I out so many of my eggs in the basket of life with Mister.
Almost every day, I try to figure out what I can reasonably do next, and I keep coming up with nothing. Even if I sell my house, I won’t get enough money to be able to move somewhere I’d be comfortable living, and still retire within the next 5 years or so. The easy answer is to just work longer, but I am already struggling so much with physical issues, that I just don’t see that being a realistic option.
So I just do what I can to try to get through the day and the next day, and keep feeling like a crazy person, because as much as I try, I can NOT figure out how to fix my life by doing things that are within my control.
Like I told my counselor yesterday, I have checked out before, once in my life, around 15 years ago. It took a long time (2 or 3 years) for me to start putting myself back together, but part of that was because I had more control over certain things that were happening, and other things that ultimately helped me get out of it, than I do now. Now, it really feels to me that life is happening to me, more than me being in charge of my life, if that makes sense.
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bookkeeper
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Post by bookkeeper on Oct 2, 2024 18:55:42 GMT -5
We had a friend that owned a glass business. He only used Sprayway glass cleaner.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Oct 2, 2024 19:32:24 GMT -5
We went to Target this morning. DH is absolutely fascinated by the huge variety of products they carry so it takes forever to walk all the aisles. I still need to Amazon 2 items I couldn't find (don't they make baby powder anymore?). I was a very good girl and didn't get any Halloween stuff although some of the skeletons were sooooo tempting. Tomorrow is Aldi and the storage locker for Halloween decor, and Friday is Whole Foods for assorted items Aldi doesn't have. DH is off looking at cars again. He really likes the Genesis but isn't comfortable with the price range so now he's looking at other stuff. I don't care-just buy something! I pointed out that if he buys a cheaper second choice, he'll whine about it for 2-3 years and go back and get the pricier one anyway which will be even pricier then. He wasn't amused and I don't give a squat Ooh, I got a hot pink skeleton a couple weeks ago at Target. Matches the gold one I got last year. Reminds me I need to put both my skeletons on the porch. Goldie greets us from atop a cooler in the basement and Pinkie lives on one of the dining room chairs for now.
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weltz
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Post by weltz on Oct 2, 2024 19:36:27 GMT -5
We went to Target this morning. DH is absolutely fascinated by the huge variety of products they carry so it takes forever to walk all the aisles. I still need to Amazon 2 items I couldn't find (don't they make baby powder anymore?). I was a very good girl and didn't get any Halloween stuff although some of the skeletons were sooooo tempting. Tomorrow is Aldi and the storage locker for Halloween decor, and Friday is Whole Foods for assorted items Aldi doesn't have. DH is off looking at cars again. He really likes the Genesis but isn't comfortable with the price range so now he's looking at other stuff. I don't care-just buy something! I pointed out that if he buys a cheaper second choice, he'll whine about it for 2-3 years and go back and get the pricier one anyway which will be even pricier then. He wasn't amused and I don't give a squat Ooh, I got a hot pink skeleton a couple weeks ago at Target. Matches the gold one of got last year. Reminds me I need to put both my skeletons on the porch. Goldie greets us from atop a cooler in the basement and Pinkie lives on one of the dining room chairs for now. Hot pink and gold skeletons? Cool!
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Oct 2, 2024 19:38:50 GMT -5
We had a friend that owned a glass business. He only used Sprayway glass cleaner. I use that on glass and the SS appliances I hate. nothing else comes close.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Oct 2, 2024 19:39:44 GMT -5
I went on Ancestry today and I have a new DNA match.
One of our common matches is the unknown half sister. I now know her name, her parents and her children.
I am not sure how I feel about this.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Oct 2, 2024 19:42:24 GMT -5
L'shana tova
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Oct 2, 2024 20:21:55 GMT -5
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Oct 2, 2024 20:45:46 GMT -5
I know I'm jaded but that would piss me off right now. You've waited this long, you can wait another 24 hours - or drive yourself.
I admit I was annoyed. He had all week to do this! So he waits until Sunday and my birthday, no less! DH can be very passive-aggressive with me at times. But he quit smoking a few days ago, and he was just grouchy in general. And probably honestly scared, because he wasn't getting better. So I kept my mouth shut and took him. Yikes! I'll catch up soon, but goodness a collapsed lung!
greenthumb59 , so I don't see an update. How's your DH?
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Oct 2, 2024 20:46:48 GMT -5
well, shit's getting real. I've logged out of this site via the work laptop, and I'm currently waiting on the OneDrive upload of the personal folder I have on this thing. it's almost done. I'm going to ask the tech doing the review if he can prioritize the review of my budget spreadsheet and send that separately first. after that, I just need to hope that they delete everything I'm uploading. bc it's tax returns and shit. oy I saw your original lay-off announcement, but I must have missed an in between step. I thought you had another month or so! Hugs.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Oct 2, 2024 20:48:48 GMT -5
I am stressed right now because between my Mom living in my house and my children using that house as their address regardless of where they actually live, I am caught up in some bullshit that has nothing to do with me besides me owing the property. So I have been yelling and fussing and cussing again, making it clear that I’m not gonna lie for ANYBODY and get myself jammed up for somebody else’s shit. It’s nothing like drugs being sold out of the house or anything like that, it’s just an agency seeing that the utility bill is in my name and knowing that I am the property owner, so they want me to sign and have some papers notarized saying that the people that live there/use that address, live with me in that house full time, year ‘round. That is not true. I will sign and have notarized, the truth, but not what is in those papers. I am upset and angry because I already have more than enough of my own problems, I don’t want to get dragged into some shit that has nothing to do with me, just because I own a house that my Mom and children use in whatever way benefits them. I’m not sure exactly when it happened, but at some point recently, I just checked out on my whole life. I don’t want to do anything, I don’t want to talk to anybody, I don’t want to even think about anything pertaining to my life, and definitely don’t want to try to figure anything out as far as what’s next for me. I go through the motions as much as I can, but *me* is sleep or something, MIA. I “disappeared” and was just a shell of myself, where I just looked like me, but there was nothing inside of me, once before, during what I still say were the worst years of my life. Once I was finally able to put myself back together after all of that, I’ve never disappeared like that, until now. I just really do not know what to do about so many things in my life, and that is making me a crazy person. I don’t know what to do about my house, because after I decided to make it be my forever house instead of my “starter” house, it became part of my retirement plans, whether I lived in it or made it a rental property. I really feel like I need to move out of the house I currently live in, to have a chance at living my best life again, but the local housing market has gotten so crazy that I can’t afford to move to somewhere I would be halfway comfortable living, even if I sell my house and use the proceeds to buy another house. Really, I am just mad as a MF, about a lot of stuff. A lot of my problems, I did it to myself, trying to be kind and treat people the way I’d want them to treat me. But all I really did was make myself have a lot of problems. Woah, my friend! I'm so sorry it's gotten this bad. I've been limiting my screen time, and I've missed a bunch.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Oct 2, 2024 21:01:47 GMT -5
I have been thinking about what my counselor said yesterday when I told her that I’ve pretty much checked out on my whole life. I told her that I don’t want to deal with anything, I don’t want to talk to anybody, I don’t even want to think about anything. She said that I still should’ve told Mister what I was feeling, before I checked out. I was like “whyyyyy”, because nothing I say to him seems to matter, so why even frustrate myself by saying anything to him. Long story short, from what I understood, she was saying that I should(ve) told him with no expectation regarding what he would do with the information, and the point was just to express those feelings and get them outside of me. I guess I didn’t explain well enough what “checking out” means to me. I finally did what I have been asking Mister for a long time, to help me avoid, distancing myself from him. I know myself well enough to know that when I start distancing myself from somebody to try to protect myself (except for my Mom and my children, obviously), in my whole life, there has been no coming back from that and getting things back to the way they were before. That is why when I am at odds with someone I genuinely care about, I tell them how they are hurting me and try to talk with them about the issues, so that when I do finally cut them off, my conscience is clear, knowing that I’d been very clear with them before I got to that point. I am beyond tired of trying to explain myself to Mister regarding the issues I am having, especially since a lot of my issues have to do with what has happened since I moved into a house with him, and he feels like like fuck all of that, the bottom line is that I should be able to function like a normal person and do everything that “normal” people do. Part of that is what was instilled in him as a soldier in war zones when he was in the Army, but I determined when I was 16yo that military life was not for me, and I have never been forced to do things and live my life in ways that contradict what is best for me and who I am as a person. But that is what is being asked of me now. With everything that is going on now, I honestly don’t see me being able to get back to not being a crazy person, living where I live. But I also honestly can’t figure out how to fix that, since I out so many of my eggs in the basket of life with Mister. Almost every day, I try to figure out what I can reasonably do next, and I keep coming up with nothing. Even if I sell my house, I won’t get enough money to be able to move somewhere I’d be comfortable living, and still retire within the next 5 years or so. The easy answer is to just work longer, but I am already struggling so much with physical issues, that I just don’t see that being a realistic option. So I just do what I can to try to get through the day and the next day, and keep feeling like a crazy person, because as much as I try, I can NOT figure out how to fix my life by doing things that are within my control. Like I told my counselor yesterday, I have checked out before, once in my life, around 15 years ago. It took a long time (2 or 3 years) for me to start putting myself back together, but part of that was because I had more control over certain things that were happening, and other things that ultimately helped me get out of it, than I do now. Now, it really feels to me that life is happening to me, more than me being in charge of my life, if that makes sense. I'm so sad. I want to hug you. If you're just sharing, then ignore this next part
Can we help you make a plan? Not a pan-to-freezer plan, and actual plan. Can we carry some of the mental load for you right now and list out concrete steps you could take for exiting your current living situation?
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Oct 2, 2024 21:03:09 GMT -5
I went on Ancestry today and I have a new DNA match. One of our common matches is the unknown half sister. I now know her name, her parents and her children. I am not sure how I feel about this. Woah, that's quite the development!
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Oct 2, 2024 21:10:00 GMT -5
well, shit's getting real. I've logged out of this site via the work laptop, and I'm currently waiting on the OneDrive upload of the personal folder I have on this thing. it's almost done. I'm going to ask the tech doing the review if he can prioritize the review of my budget spreadsheet and send that separately first. after that, I just need to hope that they delete everything I'm uploading. bc it's tax returns and shit. oy I saw your original lay-off announcement, but I must have missed an in between step. I thought you had another month or so! Hugs. oh, I do, I'm on the hook til 11/22. but I had to put in an IT ticket to review and send me my own personal shit I can't send myself anymore....including the budget spreadsheet. I asked that one to be prioritized, since I am i that file.daily and since submitting for review, it was now stuck in limbo. dude already sent me that one, and it got deleted off the work laptop before I shut it down. he rocks!!
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Oct 2, 2024 21:13:24 GMT -5
I'm sorry I haven't responded to much in the last couple weeks since my cut call. please know that I love y'all ❤️
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Oct 2, 2024 21:22:28 GMT -5
Pink- One foot in front of the other is a reasonable thing to do. And it's OK to sit and wait.
FWIW, I get how you feel. I felt the same way after I found out I was pregnant with the missy and DH relapsed.
No option was a good one. I couldn't terminate her. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself. (I'm as pro-choice as they come.) I didn't want to divorce. Give up my kids half time, and have to start living worse than we are now? Um, I wasn't getting screwed the fun way, I sure wasn't going to rush into getting screwed the unfun way. (Child support for 4 kids is 32% now, in my state. Plus alimony.)
When the missy was about 9 months old, I saw my therapist. And I was like "Heck if I know what to do." And she was like "are you ready to divorce tomorrow" and I was like hell no. I can't manage 4 kids, and two jobs half time all by myself with no support.
Then she was like, then stop fixating on it. You just need to do one foot infront of the other.
So. I did. And, things worked themselves out.
The trick, though, is what do you do in the meantime. The kids were enough to focus on for me, and the jobs.
You talked before about reading. When you want to go into that spot where you try to figure things out, can you go read a book instead? Go for a walk (I know your foot was bothering you for a long time)? Play with the dogs? Watch some Robin Williams or Bill Cosby himself?
I had to be OK with trusting myself that I would know the right thing to do at the right time. It's hard to do when essentially you've been told that you are incapable of that for decades by your mom. So there is that. It's still possible.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Oct 2, 2024 21:25:16 GMT -5
In other news, I don't have bags/dark circles under my eyes. First time in a very long time.
I also need a good night time moisturizer aimed at middle aged folks. i'll take recommendations.
And recommendations on what I should do about my car. I don't know what to replace it with.
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