lurkyloo
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Post by lurkyloo on Jun 11, 2024 12:47:02 GMT -5
It's the sorting that is time consuming. I can't imagine just having someone come and take everything and starting all over. I mean, empty kitchen cupboards and closets would be nice, but I do need/use some of that stuff too, and while I'm not overly sentimental, I don't want things like the kid's yearbooks hauled off. Also, my kids have a completely different idea of what is valuable. Case in point the drawer full of rocks in Carrot's closet. We have rocks in egg cartons in our art/game closet. In case they break
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 11, 2024 12:59:04 GMT -5
It's the sorting that is time consuming. I can't imagine just having someone come and take everything and starting all over. I mean, empty kitchen cupboards and closets would be nice, but I do need/use some of that stuff too, and while I'm not overly sentimental, I don't want things like the kid's yearbooks hauled off. Also, my kids have a completely different idea of what is valuable. Case in point the drawer full of rocks in Carrot's closet. I wasn't suggesting being that drastic! I meant: Clothes that boys have outgrown - gone Stuff belonging to ex-husbands - gone Your own clothes - do they fit? Yes = keep and No = gone Kitchen - plates, etc. for daily use along with useful appliances - keep; everything else - gone. I need to go through my closet and get rid of clothes that do not fit . While my husband is a much neater person overall, he has far too many clothes. He has two drawers filled with socks and one for just underwear. I have maybe 10 pairs of undies, 5 bras, 3 sports bras, and a dozen pairs of socks. That's what I'm doing. I have no trouble getting rid of things, but there's a lot. Like, DS must have had 60 dress shirts. I'm not kidding. My mom is nuts. So, he got too big for them and I got rid of a ton...more than half...now he's lost weight again and can fit in them and Carrot is catching up in size and might be wearing them, so are they keep or go? I can't decide.
A few weeks ago I got rid of an entire back of my van full of books...my stepmom was a buyer for B. Dalton for years and would bring bags of books every time she came to visit. I took them to my aunt's garage sale and put a free sign on them.
I think it's getting quite a bit better but it's hard to tell because I refuse to put anything back in any storage areas yet until I have those areas purged of "unwanteds". Which mean, my bedroom is piles of totes, my bed is half covered with stuff and I sleep on the clear side, my livingroom has some small piles too, but again...refuse to hide them in a storage room until everything can be put back in an organized manner. My main basement storage area is now probably over half empty. Once that is emptied out I'll just start shuttling things back there in labeled totes. Camping supplies, CDs, DVDs, each kid's school memorabila totes. Some of that stuff might eventually get gotten rid of as well, but at least I'll know where it is and it will be clearly labeled and sorted.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Jun 11, 2024 13:09:07 GMT -5
After lunch we went to pick up the line trimmer DH ordered that finally came in. Reading the 1/2" thick manual and playing with his new toy will keep him out of my hair for hours . He's also running a load of his clothes which will occupy him for a bit as well. He's ended up with stuff that can't have contact with fabric softener and I use fabric softener in all the other loads.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Jun 11, 2024 13:11:52 GMT -5
Any minute now I will definitely go and pull weeds. My lilies are blooming and I need to clear the way for them to be seen. Any minute now.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Jun 11, 2024 13:23:54 GMT -5
Happy Birthday daisylu! I saw this Summertime birthday cake, and I hope you like it.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jun 11, 2024 13:38:29 GMT -5
I wasn't suggesting being that drastic! I meant: Clothes that boys have outgrown - gone Stuff belonging to ex-husbands - gone Your own clothes - do they fit? Yes = keep and No = gone Kitchen - plates, etc. for daily use along with useful appliances - keep; everything else - gone. I need to go through my closet and get rid of clothes that do not fit . While my husband is a much neater person overall, he has far too many clothes. He has two drawers filled with socks and one for just underwear. I have maybe 10 pairs of undies, 5 bras, 3 sports bras, and a dozen pairs of socks. That's what I'm doing. I have no trouble getting rid of things, but there's a lot. Like, DS must have had 60 dress shirts. I'm not kidding. My mom is nuts. So, he got too big for them and I got rid of a ton...more than half...now he's lost weight again and can fit in them and Carrot is catching up in size and might be wearing them, so are they keep or go? I can't decide.
A few weeks ago I got rid of an entire back of my van full of books...my stepmom was a buyer for B. Dalton for years and would bring bags of books every time she came to visit. I took them to my aunt's garage sale and put a free sign on them.
I think it's getting quite a bit better but it's hard to tell because I refuse to put anything back in any storage areas yet until I have those areas purged of "unwanteds". Which mean, my bedroom is piles of totes, my bed is half covered with stuff and I sleep on the clear side, my livingroom has some small piles too, but again...refuse to hide them in a storage room until everything can be put back in an organized manner. My main basement storage area is now probably over half empty. Once that is emptied out I'll just start shuttling things back there in labeled totes. Camping supplies, CDs, DVDs, each kid's school memorabila totes. Some of that stuff might eventually get gotten rid of as well, but at least I'll know where it is and it will be clearly labeled and sorted.
Well it sounds to me that you're doing just great! I think it's very wise not to put things back until you've cleared out the entire space.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 11, 2024 13:45:54 GMT -5
It's the sorting that is time consuming. I can't imagine just having someone come and take everything and starting all over. I mean, empty kitchen cupboards and closets would be nice, but I do need/use some of that stuff too, and while I'm not overly sentimental, I don't want things like the kid's yearbooks hauled off. Also, my kids have a completely different idea of what is valuable. Case in point the drawer full of rocks in Carrot's closet. Right? The cleaner I hired also tidies, which basically entails putting everything in a pile or shoving it in a drawer…but there was an order to the mess and now I have to re-sort it out to find things. I specifically asked her not to throw things away, bc she probably wouldn’t recognize what’s meaningful or not to us. It doesn’t take much bandwidth to just throw stuff away but that’s so wasteful. Disposing of things mindfully takes a lot of sorting, decisions, and action. I have a bunch of bags waiting for me to arrange someone to pick up, but I also want to write the inventory on the side of each a. to make it easier on whatever charity and b. so I have a record if/when I want to deduct on taxes. Side note: I have two ten+ year old breast pumps with accoutrements and you can’t find a place to take them and I don’t want to clog up the landfills with functional and sterilizable stuff like that So they sit as clutter in the closet. I know it's work but you could probably easily sell the pumps or put them for free on Facebook. If they still sell the parts for them there are probably quite a few women who would take them. I got my Medela pump for $80 off Ebay. My insurance didn't not cover pumps and this was before they had them installed all over the hospital campus. I wouldn't sell the parts though if they are used even if cleaned well.
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lurkyloo
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“Time means nothing now,” said Toad. “It is just the thing that happens between snacks.”
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Post by lurkyloo on Jun 11, 2024 14:19:02 GMT -5
Graduation and bday stuff done, IEP meeting in the books, SIL is headed home so I have my office back from guestroom duty. Just need to get through fathers day, anniversary and DH’s bday in the next 2.5 weeks. Easy peasy.
Also holy credit card bills Batman. Four vet visits, half the summer camp bill, party supplies, presents for all of the above.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Jun 11, 2024 14:19:49 GMT -5
countrygirl2 You seem to have struggled with your estate planning for quite some time, and I see you are now contemplating how to handle your stocks and bonds. From what you have shared here, you have several goals including protecting your assets from creditors like Medicaid, providing funds to help with your daughter's future needs, maximizing your son's inheritance, minimizing your DIL's access to funds you are uncertain she can manage, retaining your personal access to and control of part of the $$, and minimizing any tax hit. Do you feel it could help your decision-making process if you ranked these goals in order of their importance to you? There may be a conflict between some of the goals like protecting your money from creditors and keeping it outside of the trust so this might enable you to better see what your top priorities are. Estate planning is complex and brings up a lot of tough questions - I hope you find a good path forward on it.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jun 11, 2024 14:23:11 GMT -5
The attorney has the trust set up so it kicks in if we end up in a nursing home or both die.
What happens is if we get incapacitated, probably when just one of us is left hopefully, then one of them and one of us has to sign to get money out. And that's good so we don't get took by people. Or if we get in a nursing home it is protected and we can still get Medicaid. He said they have similar in Washington. Since he and his wife write a lot of the bills for senior citizen protections I'm pretty sure he knows what he is doing. Some have been enacted. He is a sharp cookie with a sharp price, LOL!
I had my bone density done, oh my! I used to be 5'9.5" tall and now I'm only 5'6.5". This is not good, some from my feet breaking down, some from my spine compressing. But at least my weight was 150 still so I haven't gained a bunch up here. I've been eating quite a bit but am careful. When I'm hungry fruits and veggies, fish, or if fast food, watch the calories. I will offset a high calorie items with a snack later of little tomatoes, oranges, pears, apples, cherries, or things like that. Or cottage cheese and pears packed in their own juice, no sugar added.
I worked in the yard yesterday sitting on the ground in various contortions. Now my right leg at the hip has given away several times last night and today.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 14:25:39 GMT -5
Two things: 1) you're not trying to sell your house; and 2) you've posted a lot about how stressed out your house makes you. There are times when my husband stresses me out because he is so much neater, cleaner, and more well organized and it drives me nuts! At the same time, when our house does get overly messy it makes me anxious. It's much more relaxing when things are tidy. I do wonder if there's some sort of psychological reason why visible mess/clutter can negatively impact a mood. ETA: I realized what I just said sounds sanctimonious. I'm really not judging how other people choose to live because some people aren't bothered at all by untidiness. I guess living in a small space makes having to keep on top of things a priority because there's absolutely nowhere to just shove stuff and close the door. Even though we do make an effort, if we were to sell, it would be necessary to rent a pod and clear out a ton of our stuff.We had to do this for our first place. There was 4 of us and 800 sq feet. The kids were 5 and under at the time. We didn't have a prayer. LOL. I was amazed at the lack of clutter and how the house was spotless every time we were here during the buying process. All the surfaces like counters and tables had minimal things on them and were clean, nothing was out of place and everything was spic and span clean. A married couple and their 3 young boys lived here. I don’t think the oldest was even 10yo. We were here 3 times, the first time we looked at it, then we brought the girls to let them see it, and then for the inspection. By the time we did the inspection, I felt bad for the family, because it couldn’t have been easy to keep the house spotless during the selling process, especially with 3 young children. Now I wonder if they moved a lot of their stuff to a Pod too, I’d never realized that was a thing lol.
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lurkyloo
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“Time means nothing now,” said Toad. “It is just the thing that happens between snacks.”
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Post by lurkyloo on Jun 11, 2024 14:30:59 GMT -5
Right? The cleaner I hired also tidies, which basically entails putting everything in a pile or shoving it in a drawer…but there was an order to the mess and now I have to re-sort it out to find things. I specifically asked her not to throw things away, bc she probably wouldn’t recognize what’s meaningful or not to us. It doesn’t take much bandwidth to just throw stuff away but that’s so wasteful. Disposing of things mindfully takes a lot of sorting, decisions, and action. I have a bunch of bags waiting for me to arrange someone to pick up, but I also want to write the inventory on the side of each a. to make it easier on whatever charity and b. so I have a record if/when I want to deduct on taxes. Side note: I have two ten+ year old breast pumps with accoutrements and you can’t find a place to take them and I don’t want to clog up the landfills with functional and sterilizable stuff like that So they sit as clutter in the closet. I know it's work but you could probably easily sell the pumps or put them for free on Facebook. If they still sell the parts for them there are probably quite a few women who would take them. I got my Medela pump for $80 off Ebay. My insurance didn't not cover pumps and this was before they had them installed all over the hospital campus. I wouldn't sell the parts though if they are used even if cleaned well. These are the non-Medela brand…Ameda maybe? Started with A. I feel like you could boil the attachments for 20 min, pretty sure I did that before use, and the tubing never sees the milk although that’s certainly easily replaced too. It’s all academic anyway though bc I am never going to put in the legwork necessary to get rid of the things DS can be in charge of getting rid of them when I get old and senile and he ships me off to assisted living. I probably ought to sign up for freecycle, but I’d settle for someone coming and picking up all these 2T sleepers than used to fit my currently 5’3” kid.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 11, 2024 14:36:51 GMT -5
Ha! I get it, I really do 1,400 sq ft (no basement), two adults, a teen, a tween, and a very fat cat I wouldn’t let the cleaner clean the bedrooms bc so. Much. Stuff. I have two bedrooms that I don't use that I won't allow the cleaners to clean. I never have. Since I took my bedroom back, they do clean my bedroom. I still have too much stuff but I am not trying to sell my house. I have been told by realtors when I lived in my last condo that I owned that I needed to rent a storage unit for the stuff until the house sold, even in a hot market. He was correct.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 14:36:58 GMT -5
I wasn't suggesting being that drastic! I meant: Clothes that boys have outgrown - gone Stuff belonging to ex-husbands - gone Your own clothes - do they fit? Yes = keep and No = gone Kitchen - plates, etc. for daily use along with useful appliances - keep; everything else - gone. I need to go through my closet and get rid of clothes that do not fit . While my husband is a much neater person overall, he has far too many clothes. He has two drawers filled with socks and one for just underwear. I have maybe 10 pairs of undies, 5 bras, 3 sports bras, and a dozen pairs of socks. That's what I'm doing. I have no trouble getting rid of things, but there's a lot. Like, DS must have had 60 dress shirts. I'm not kidding. My mom is nuts. So, he got too big for them and I got rid of a ton...more than half...now he's lost weight again and can fit in them and Carrot is catching up in size and might be wearing them, so are they keep or go? I can't decide.
A few weeks ago I got rid of an entire back of my van full of books...my stepmom was a buyer for B. Dalton for years and would bring bags of books every time she came to visit. I took them to my aunt's garage sale and put a free sign on them.
I think it's getting quite a bit better but it's hard to tell because I refuse to put anything back in any storage areas yet until I have those areas purged of "unwanteds". Which mean, my bedroom is piles of totes, my bed is half covered with stuff and I sleep on the clear side, my livingroom has some small piles too, but again...refuse to hide them in a storage room until everything can be put back in an organized manner. My main basement storage area is now probably over half empty. Once that is emptied out I'll just start shuttling things back there in labeled totes. Camping supplies, CDs, DVDs, each kid's school memorabila totes. Some of that stuff might eventually get gotten rid of as well, but at least I'll know where it is and it will be clearly labeled and sorted.
So you are making progress, that’s great! You will eventually get to a turning point where you finally start to see a real difference. Just keep going, even if it’s slowly. You got this! The stuff that belongs to the ex’s, can you just box it all up according to who it belongs to, without regard for what might be valuable or not, and tell them that have x amount of days to come get it, or you are putting it out with the trash? Let them do the mental work of sorting through it to see what they’d like to keep, instead of you trying to decide for them, if they even come get it. If they don’t come get it within your time frame, follow through and throw the boxes away. Is that a bad idea?
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 14:44:18 GMT -5
I have been lazy all day. The only productive things I’ve done were my virtual counseling session and I washed my jeans to wear to work. Oh, and of course I checked on my tomato babies this morning.
That’s probably going to be it for me today lol.
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 11, 2024 14:44:47 GMT -5
No, I've considered all their stuff long since forfeited...BUT...there's good things in there too. At least first ex's stuff. Tools, containers of fasteners, etc. This weekend when he was here helping with the electric he asked if he could take the box of shims that was in the garage. Uh yeah. That's YOUR box of shims from probably the 90's.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 11, 2024 14:47:22 GMT -5
I am going to hire someone to empty the room in my basement. Put the stuff in a dumpster and let them take it. One of my CDs is coming due next month and I will set that money aside until that is done.
The boxes have been there for 16 years. I have not opened the boxes that are left for 16 years. I moved the important stuff upstairs over the years. I don't need that stuff. I don't go in that room because of that stuff and I want it gone.
That kind of company will have it out of here in a day because they have no attachment to it and I do.
I have not needed it for 16 years enough to go through the boxes. Can't tell you how many times I have thought about the boxes and done nothing. I don't need the stuff. I used to save pretty boxes. Some of those are down there.
It's all going.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 11, 2024 15:00:44 GMT -5
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 11, 2024 15:09:28 GMT -5
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 11, 2024 15:17:36 GMT -5
Well, just had a cat house put together in my yard. Apparently Home Depot does builds for nonprofits and we got on their radar this year. So I just got a free cat house put together. Now I need a bridge to connect it to the foster room window but I can deal. Now to decide which cat comes out to test it. Yay! I want to see pictures! I assume it has a door and windows? What's inside? Not exactly the kind of cat house I thought of, initially! 🤣
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Jun 11, 2024 15:20:01 GMT -5
I do like the open floor plan and see the one-level as a plus because I think you said your mom uses a walker. The kitchen is sort of tight, but some additional lighting could really help enlarge it visually.
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Jun 11, 2024 15:29:24 GMT -5
first, a laugh. Zillow automatically calculates the commute time to my office, when I'm signed in. on this link? all it said was "Too far" I've never noticed that before, on any of the other links I've clicked. anyway, comments.... that kitchen would drive me nuts, for a lot of reasons. that they left warm wood-toned cabinets in a house that's entirely grayscale means that those are the cabinets that were in good enough shape to leave in place. that weird panel between the end cabinet and the range backsplash tells me that some cabinets were ripped out. I'm surprised they managed to find a cabinet door to add as an end cap on the row they left in place. TBH, I probably wouldn't have noticed the weird panel in the pics if it didn't oddly overlap the range backsplash. there's a lot of pictures of spaces without windows. why are they choosing to focus the listing pics on the basement space? are they hiding things upstairs? remember what I said this weekend about the "We Buy Ugly Houses" people? this feels like that, esp with the kitchen cabinets as they are. you don't want anything to do with a house flipped by those contractors, they cut corners to spend as little as possible to maximize their profits. I'd run from this one, quickly.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 15:33:13 GMT -5
No, I've considered all their stuff long since forfeited...BUT...there's good things in there too. At least first ex's stuff. Tools, containers of fasteners, etc. This weekend when he was here helping with the electric he asked if he could take the box of shims that was in the garage. Uh yeah. That's YOUR box of shims from probably the 90's. I get it about the good stuff lol. Find or create a “home” for the things you’d like to keep and will actually use (I agree about it being forfeited after all this time), and box up all the rest and tell them to come get it, or it’s going to get trashed. I swear if I lived near you, I’d come help you, just because I enjoy doing stuff like that. I’m the weirdo that likes throwing things away and getting rid of unnecessary stuff. It’s not much fun now that the decisions aren’t all mine anymore, so helping someone else would maybe scratch that itch for me. I wonder if I could somehow turn that into a side hustle in my local area. Not really joking…..
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 15:44:44 GMT -5
First of all, the photographer was not the best. Some spaces/rooms, I’m not sure what purpose they are supposed to serve. That doesn’t mean it’s not a good house though, it just means I’d need to see it in person to be able to make better sense of the layout and rooms. FWIW, I am not a fan of the kitchen either.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 11, 2024 15:45:21 GMT -5
Not crazy about this one.
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Anne_in_VA
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Post by Anne_in_VA on Jun 11, 2024 15:56:38 GMT -5
We looked at this house at 417 Lawndale Drive, Pearisburg, VA. WHAT DO YOU ALL THINK. I really like it. They have lots of stuff and the closets are stuffed to the gills, but it has lots of storage and has everything we need and more. I like the size of the house and the fact that it's a ranch. Love the view. The Deck is nice, too. So is the yard. The kitchen would make me pause. I'm not a fan of islands, and it seems to be a small kitchen. If it's just you and your DH, I think it would work well. If you've got lots of people over...depending on how much you'll entertain...I'd think hard about that. It seems pretty dated for being built in 2008. Like, our circa 1990's kitchen looks an awful lot like this one. Is the roof original? Does the realtor know why it's been on the market for so long? In my parts, houses that sit on the market for a week, that's too long. It’s the original kitchen and I would probably replace the cabinets at some point, but not right away. All of the floors need replacing and that would be done right away. It is the original roof. It looks stained, but is in good shape from what we can see. An inspection would tell us if it needs replacing and we would base our offer on those things happening. It’s not unusual for a house to be on the market that long in that area. It’s a buyer’s market and many people rent but don’t buy.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 11, 2024 16:06:48 GMT -5
So today I got a small can of some Non-Alcoholic beverage from a company that Katy Perry co-founded.
It's almost $1/fluid ounce.
I feel bougie.
And also. Apparently, now they put the shrooms in the non-alcoholic drink so you feel buzzed.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 11, 2024 16:11:04 GMT -5
Also, I'm doing pretty good. The worst thing that is bothering me is that DH is going to use his iPad to read. Which really, is not the end of the world. I would have felt better if he would have brought his kindle instead. But, I know, in the end it doesn't matter. If he's hell bent to find a way, he's hell bent to find a way.
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Anne_in_VA
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Post by Anne_in_VA on Jun 11, 2024 16:13:54 GMT -5
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Jun 11, 2024 16:17:16 GMT -5
So today I got a small can of some Non-Alcoholic beverage from a company that Katy Perry co-founded. It's almost $1/fluid ounce. I feel bougie. And also. Apparently, now they put the shrooms in the non-alcoholic drink so you feel buzzed. De Soi - I'm at a work team meeting and someone was singing its praises! Adaptogens in the mushrooms for stress relief, etc. - mushrooms are taking the product world by storm. Mushroom jerky, mushroom drinks, mushroom soups, etc. Can you tell I work for a company that deals with CPG products and emerging brands? 😂
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