what are you doing right now?

[toomuchreality]

Oct 22, 2023 19:41:16 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Oct 22, 2023 19:34:22 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

We had a crazy good time at today's outing to our friend's home.  There were seventeen of us this year, all ages and stages, eleven persons of color including a totally blind former surgeon.  We thoroughly discussed everything from the environmental and social impact of Amazon, to gun control, social media, public education, work/life balance, access to healthcare, and much more.  And we ate an incredible autumn-themed meal including a cranberry-pecan quinoa that was amazing. DH and I saw old friends from years past and made new ones.  One woman looked very familiar to me and, toward the end of the afternoon, we finally figured out that we actually knew one another from her role as a community representative with our solid waste services.  She and I had participated in several community clean-up events and local police initiatives.  I never knew she was a friend and fellow parishioner of our hostess, just a couple degrees of separation.  It was a truly beautiful time together and I am grateful.  

A group like this seems like a good group to discuss what to do about homelessness.

I'm glad you had a good time and enjoyed yourselves.

[raeoflyte]

Oct 22, 2023 18:04:20 GMT -5 daisylu said:

Oct 22, 2023 17:21:01 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

If we admit that monogamy isn't for everyone I think that opens up some leeway. It doesn't forgive the hurt caused from an affair, but if alternative relationships were more acceptable there might be fewer hurtful affairs.

IA. I remember watching "Big Love" on HBO many moons ago when I was single. I think I could live that life the other way around - meaning I'd be the wife with multiple husbands. Which is even more taboo than a man having multiple wives.

DH would never be onboard with that and I can admit that I'd never be onboard with him being intimate with another woman, so this is where we are.

That's my (over)sharing for the day. I'd be happy to have an offline discussion with anyone who wants to PM.

I've always said I'd take a sister-wife. Whether I was sleeping with them or not. Women get shit done. Take out the patriarchal religious bs and I'm in.

I've suggested to dh that we try an open marriage and was shocked how opposed to it he was. I know he feels neglected by me, and if I didn't have to handle every other damn thing maybe that would be different.

[soupandstew]

Oct 22, 2023 19:41:16 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Oct 22, 2023 19:34:22 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

We had a crazy good time at today's outing to our friend's home.  There were seventeen of us this year, all ages and stages, eleven persons of color including a totally blind former surgeon.  We thoroughly discussed everything from the environmental and social impact of Amazon, to gun control, social media, public education, work/life balance, access to healthcare, and much more.  And we ate an incredible autumn-themed meal including a cranberry-pecan quinoa that was amazing. DH and I saw old friends from years past and made new ones.  One woman looked very familiar to me and, toward the end of the afternoon, we finally figured out that we actually knew one another from her role as a community representative with our solid waste services.  She and I had participated in several community clean-up events and local police initiatives.  I never knew she was a friend and fellow parishioner of our hostess, just a couple degrees of separation.  It was a truly beautiful time together and I am grateful.  

A group like this seems like a good group to discuss what to do about homelessness.

We did discuss that, especially in terms of access to housing and mental health resources.  Pretty much everyone in the room has someone they know with a mental health or addiction problem who's on the streets and their families struggle to help them, especially when they reject help.  

[raeoflyte]

We've had such a good trip. Walked the farm, saw the wind turbine for the first time since it was installed, had a long visit with dsis and I's farm operator, almost took home a barn kitten. Ds lost his glasses but found them back on the back 40 when we went to look today which is amazing. He also got to drive around the farm which was his first time driving (he's 14). The dogs got to run and play. Puppy proved to be bestest girl, perfect recall, herded her people and always made sure to know where they were. Devil dog proved himself to be a beast but dh got to deal with him instead of me so that was a win too. Great time spent with the kids, dsis, even dh, my parents and saw my cousin and her 2 kids. Dc is cousins daughters new bff. They just absolutely adored dc, and dc loves little kids.

I really want to figure out a way to get out here a lot more often. My dad talks about moving a trailer out to the property but vacant buildings/homes end up being vandalized so that seems problematic. I love the idea of the converted silo tiny homes and I think they'd be ignored. But that would be a project.

It's tempting to move. Everyone really loved being up there. But I can't see pulling the kids out of their schools, and by the time they're done, I expect my folks may need more help than would be easy to access here.

[swamp]

I had a really weird dream last night.  There is a lawyer I often work with and he gets called to handle lots of stuff when “WE NEED A LAWYER RIGHT NOW” things happen. 

I dreamed I called him, his mom answered and told me I was working her Mikey too hard and she would no longer let him answer my calls.  He’s a 35ish year old man who has never given me any indication he has an unhealthy relationship with his parents. 

[giramomma]

Now I know why binding clips were invented. I'm starting to look like Mike from Monsters Inc where he puts the door back together.

[giramomma]

Oct 22, 2023 19:26:17 GMT -5 stillmovingforward said:

Oct 22, 2023 18:59:15 GMT -5 giramomma said:

I have to learn how to bind a quilt. Not the normal way, since it's not really bound.  But I still have to learn the stitch.

We were at defcon 3 for a while because I couldn't find one of my two thimbles.

I am tired.

I love to bind quilts. It's very relaxing.

How far away do you make your binding stitches?

[TheOtherMe]

Oct 22, 2023 19:10:04 GMT -5 swamp said:

Oct 22, 2023 19:03:50 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

I just heard a really sad story about one of my neighbors.  He is one of three middle-aged children.  He and his siblings always thought they would inherit a substantial amount as mom & dad lived in a little old house in a very gentrifying neighborhood where the lot value would be at least $1 million.  This inheritance was to be the funding of their retirements.  Mom & dad drove nice cars, dressed very well, and were VERY generous donors at their church so the kids assumed there were other assets like investments.  No surprise, the parents were old-school, and would not talk about $$ with the children.  Mom & dad both developed serious health problems, first mom and then dad.  In and out of the hospital, falls at home, stays in rehab places, etc.  Finally they were physically unable to return home, even with home health assistance, and were both placed in a nursing home where they stayed for a couple of months before passing away.  Long story short, they had executed some type cash-out arrangement/reverse mortgage or something like that which was how they kept up their lifestyle and lavish charitable support for the church.  After the medical bills and nursing homes costs were paid, there was nothing left for the kids to inherit.  Two of the three children were forced to take early retirement because of significant health problems, and they had to apply for SSDI.  The third sibling is saddled with a lot of debt for their children's education which they anticipated paying off with their inheritance.  

Maybe I’m mean, but I don’t really think it’s  sad. 

They were  dumb. 

don’t count your chickens before they hatch.  You are never guaranteed an inheritance 

This is the way I felt about my parents and an inheritance.  They gave us a rather small amount which we both held on to until the 5 year lookback period was over.  A big later mom gave DN1 the car and I was concerned about that.  

For what they made they had saved a good deal of money, but they were never rich.  As well as dad was doing after mom died, he was saving money every month but he wouldn't put it in to a savings account so it made no interest.

Their home was sold.  I never figured on receiving a dime until dad actually died.  I didn't sit around and try to figure out what to do with the money.

I will say remodeling the bathroom is some of the best money I have ever spent.

[TheOtherMe]

Had an interesting chat with the Toddler tonight.  It was conducted in "cat" as the language.  When he spoke to his parents, he spoke in English.  When he spoke to me, he spoke in cat.  

[stillmovingforward]

Oct 22, 2023 20:39:59 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Oct 22, 2023 19:26:17 GMT -5 stillmovingforward said:

I love to bind quilts. It's very relaxing.

How far away do you make your binding stitches?

How far away from what?
2-1/2 wide cut. Long enough to bind the quilt. Fold in half lengthwise (back side facing in) and steam iron.
Line raw edges of binding with raw edges of the back of the quilt. Sew in 1/4 inch from the edge on the back side first with a sewing machine, then flip to the front and sew down by hand. End up being about 1/3 inch so you can't see the machine stitches on the front.

[Pink Cashmere]

We just got home from dinner with Mister’s cousin J and his BF.

I’d never met J until he introduced himself to me at the cemetery after Mr. Messy’s funeral. He and Mister hadn’t seen each other in some years at that point. But he was the only one of Mister’s relatives that came over the weekend after the funeral, when Mister cooked for his family since there wasn’t a repast. He struck me as someone I’d like to get to know the day he introduced himself to me, and it was confirmed when he hung out with us the day he came over to the house.

Dinner tonight was a date, that he said that night he was at our house, we were going to have today, because he was appalled when Mister told him how difficult it had become to get me out of the house. 

I enjoyed chatting with him and his BF. J is a bit of a character, and Mister and I both laughed more and harder than we have in a long time. J is not shy at all, and good with interesting conversation, so that helped make it fun, because his BF and I are both more reserved, but were willing to engage, and Mister can be awkward, but he wasn’t tonight, and was able to just relax and enjoy himself. 

I am glad we went. We all said we want to do it again soon. We should have set a date like J did last month, to make sure it happens, but we didn’t. 

[toomuchreality]

Oct 22, 2023 22:51:41 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

We just got home from dinner with Mister’s cousin J and his BF.

I’d never met J until he introduced himself to me at the cemetery after Mr. Messy’s funeral. He and Mister hadn’t seen each other in some years at that point. But he was the only one of Mister’s relatives that came over the weekend after the funeral, when Mister cooked for his family since there wasn’t a repast. He struck me as someone I’d like to get to know the day he introduced himself to me, and it was confirmed when he hung out with us the day he came over to the house.

Dinner tonight was a date, that he said that night he was at our house, we were going to have today, because he was appalled when Mister told him how difficult it had become to get me out of the house. 

I enjoyed chatting with him and his BF. J is a bit of a character, and Mister and I both laughed more and harder than we have in a long time. J is not shy at all, and good with interesting conversation, so that helped make it fun, because his BF and I are both more reserved, but were willing to engage, and Mister can be awkward, but he wasn’t tonight, and was able to just relax and enjoy himself. 

I am glad we went. We all said we want to do it again soon. We should have set a date like J did last month, to make sure it happens, but we didn’t. 

Commit to setting a date tomorrow. It sounds like a great idea! And like you all had a great time. I'm glad you got out and away for a bit. I hope you really do, do it again. 😊

[countrygirl2]

Well I nibbled all day.

Had some shredded wheat for breakfast, didn't have much and used it up. Coffee with that.
Then a bit later some cottage cheese, pretty good stuff.

We went to the city to get things and DD had a cheeseburger, when I ran into Walmart I bought a banana and a kitkat bar. I had a couple wafers of it, hubs had the rest.

DD ate the rest of her Subway for dinner and I made hubs a baked potato, cauliflower with cheese sauce and peas and carrots. I ate some of the cauliflower and sauce with my smoked salmon. It's 4 ounces at 250 calories and I only ate about 3. Gave the kitties the rest, Smokey ate some, Tigger just sniffed at it. So I did well today on watching my eating. The steroid dose finally wore off a week or so back, that was tough.

We are getting ready for his day of liquid diet tomorrow. He does fine on things like that pretty disciplined, me I would struggle. He is sure going to be hungry Tuesday as his surgery isn't till around 10:30.

I plan on jello, he can't have milk products, but soda, and beef broth from bouillon. He can also have fruit juice with no pulp.

Good night all, my bed time. Smokey lay on my lap sleeping for an hour or two, I finally had to go to the bathroom so had to make him move. He is now in his bedroom for the night too.

[Opti]

Oct 22, 2023 21:01:33 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Had an interesting chat with the Toddler tonight.  It was conducted in "cat" as the language.  When he spoke to his parents, he spoke in English.  When he spoke to me, he spoke in cat.  

Are you going to reveal what "cat" language is?

[toomuchreality]

Oct 23, 2023 1:01:32 GMT -5 Opti said:

Oct 22, 2023 21:01:33 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Had an interesting chat with the Toddler tonight.  It was conducted in "cat" as the language.  When he spoke to his parents, he spoke in English.  When he spoke to me, he spoke in cat.  

Are you going to reveal what "cat" language is?

Meow? (Whatever that means.)
I know he thinks she's special.
😊

[finnime]

Good morning, diligent invisipeeps, preparing for the day, week and season to come. Welcome to Monday. I hope this day provides you joy and levity and no one pees in your soup.

Yesterday's birthday brunch was really nice. Everyone including DH and ODB had a great time. It helps that we in my family genuinely like each other. We share a lot, especially a quirky sense of humor and some introversion. Well, except for DD--she's very extroverted, but that comes in handy when we need someone to communicate with the outside world.

And yesterday was sunny. The deluges of Saturday were gone, leaving the sun to rise again.

[ners]

Moring all.  Behind schedule yet again.  

[daisylu]

I REALLY want to go back to bed.

[Opti]

I don't speak guinea pig, but I translate some of it. Right now, I got the squeak sequence which means the pellets are all eaten, where is the hay? He now has his morning hay and is munching away.

[chiver78]

I'm up, waiting on some laundry to finish running so I can fold and put it away. last day of my long weekend, and I picked today because I just don't want to deal with another Monday full of calls. I need to make a Walmart run and then come home and do some batch cooking of proteins for the chest freezer. the pup stash is totally wiped out. I'm hoping the sun comes out a bit later, and that the pups will go outside and enjoy it. Punk is pouting at me for being on the laptop right now. 

[andi9899]

Oct 22, 2023 19:03:50 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

I just heard a really sad story about one of my neighbors.  He is one of three middle-aged children.  He and his siblings always thought they would inherit a substantial amount as mom & dad lived in a little old house in a very gentrifying neighborhood where the lot value would be at least $1 million.  This inheritance was to be the funding of their retirements.  Mom & dad drove nice cars, dressed very well, and were VERY generous donors at their church so the kids assumed there were other assets like investments.  No surprise, the parents were old-school, and would not talk about $$ with the children.  Mom & dad both developed serious health problems, first mom and then dad.  In and out of the hospital, falls at home, stays in rehab places, etc.  Finally they were physically unable to return home, even with home health assistance, and were both placed in a nursing home where they stayed for a couple of months before passing away.  Long story short, they had executed some type cash-out arrangement/reverse mortgage or something like that which was how they kept up their lifestyle and lavish charitable support for the church.  After the medical bills and nursing homes costs were paid, there was nothing left for the kids to inherit.  Two of the three children were forced to take early retirement because of significant health problems, and they had to apply for SSDI.  The third sibling is saddled with a lot of debt for their children's education which they anticipated paying off with their inheritance.  

That sucks. Why would someone bank on someone else's finances to fund their retirement? I don't understand that. I'm assuming I'll get nothing but half the sale price of the house when my parents die. I don't factor that into any retirement plans.

[andi9899]

Oct 22, 2023 19:14:11 GMT -5 soupandstew said:

If I were to be alone, I would love to date and get laid.  No way do I want a sleep over, move in, cohabitation etc.  Food, travel, romp in the sack, goodby!  And 50/50 on all expenses, don't even think I'm paying the freight.  Don't want to hear about your physical ailments, don't want to hear about your poor portfolio performance, don't want to hear about your problems.

This is how I roll. I admit that I would be a horrible partner, so I just stick to what I'm good at. 😇

[andi9899]

Oct 22, 2023 20:16:36 GMT -5 swamp said:

I had a really weird dream last night.  There is a lawyer I often work with and he gets called to handle lots of stuff when “WE NEED A LAWYER RIGHT NOW” things happen. 

I dreamed I called him, his mom answered and told me I was working her Mikey too hard and she would no longer let him answer my calls.  He’s a 35ish year old man who has never given me any indication he has an unhealthy relationship with his parents. 

I don't know about you guys, but sometimes my dreams don't make any sense at all. I've had some really weird ones.

[giramomma]

Oct 23, 2023 6:14:24 GMT -5 daisylu said:

I REALLY want to go back to bed.

I'm either in bed or in the bathroom.  Apparently mother nature thinks I should go through natural colonoscopy prep for funsies.

Seriously, i'm on the cusp of starting hour 5 of this.

[andi9899]

Last night I fell asleep on the couch. I woke up at 1 am and realized that the twins hadn't been out one last time. I let Macy out and she took off after something. Her collar was on too loose because she was able to get out of it once she reached the end of the tie out cable. So I got to get in the car and look for her. Luckily she ran out in front of me before I got too far so she was only loose for a minute or two. Her collar got tighted and I'm going to have to figure out how to rig this tie out better.

[andi9899]

I have a shipper asking for higher limits on one of my insureds policies. I said I'd run it by the carrier. They responded they didn't know why I couldn't just increase the coverage on the certificate. It doesn't need to be reviewed. Um, no. I'm not committing insurance fraud for you, sorry.

[TheOtherMe]

Oct 23, 2023 1:01:32 GMT -5 Opti said:

Oct 22, 2023 21:01:33 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Had an interesting chat with the Toddler tonight.  It was conducted in "cat" as the language.  When he spoke to his parents, he spoke in English.  When he spoke to me, he spoke in cat.  

Are you going to reveal what "cat" language is?

He used various inflections of Meow and I was supposed to know what that meant.

He did use English to tell me good night and I love you.

[daisylu]

Oct 23, 2023 8:55:32 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Oct 23, 2023 6:14:24 GMT -5 daisylu said:

I REALLY want to go back to bed.

I'm either in bed or in the bathroom.  Apparently mother nature thinks I should go through natural colonoscopy prep for funsies.

Seriously, i'm on the cusp of starting hour 5 of this.

Hope you feel better soon!

[Pink Cashmere]

Oct 23, 2023 8:55:32 GMT -5 giramomma said:

Oct 23, 2023 6:14:24 GMT -5 daisylu said:

I REALLY want to go back to bed.

I'm either in bed or in the bathroom.  Apparently mother nature thinks I should go through natural colonoscopy prep for funsies.

Seriously, i'm on the cusp of starting hour 5 of this.

I have spent way too many days like that.

I hope you feel better soon.

[bean29]

Oct 23, 2023 6:14:24 GMT -5 daisylu said:

I REALLY want to go back to bed.

Me too, I did not have much caffeine at all yesterday (1 diet Pepsi, which is unusual for me), but I could not sleep at all last night.  finally fell asleep about 4:50 am and then got up at about 7:20 which is very late - I still had to walk the dogs and feed the Rabbits.  Got to work at 8:50.  I like to be here a bit earlier, but no one is squaking about my hours.  I usually stay till 6 pm.

Got a check ready to send Salvation Army for Turkey Day dinner $109.02 They say that will provide 46 meals.  I also have to pay a bill to lab corp.  Date of service is 8/3/2023, letter is dated 10/12/23 and they say my $7.14 bill is seriously past due and they are threating to send me to collection.  That is barely enough time for claims to process through insurance and then me to pay any balance due.  Grr!

Washed my bedding yesterday (we went to the laundromat).  I can get my comforter in the washer/dryer, but it would have taken all day.  We did the comforter in one load (50 lb washer? $7.25) and the towels in another load (30 lb $4.25?) and the sheets in a smaller cheaper machine).  Regular dryers were $1.25 for 32 minutes and .25 for each 8 minutes after that.  Comforter went in a 40 lb dryer I think it was $2.50 for 32 minutes then .25 for each 5 minutes after that.  I set up the new computer DH bought me.  I had bought one with Touch from Best Buy, but DH had me return it saying he would buy me a "better one".  He bought me a Vostro with out touch.  I was pretty mad, but he claims this one has better security features.  It pulled my backup from my old computer over using Microsoft one drive.  Pretty cool, but I don't have all my files.  I think I had some I did not want on the cloud.  So now I have to figure out how to add them in.  At least the old one is still working. I had a lot going on yesterday.  DH was insistent that I set it up, so I let the set up run, poked around a bit, and did not really do anything else.  

I bought new furnace filters from Farm and Fleet last week.  They were out of stock, but I asked for a raincheck.  They ordered them for me right away.  I ordered 4 16x25x4 best air "PET" Box filters for ~$19.99 each. $79.96 with tax.  I am   to admit that it was nearly 2 years since I last changed it.  I usually do better than that.  You can stack the excess ones right above where the filter goes, so I usually have extras.  We have mice in the utility room.  DH opened the ceiling and ran a 220 out to the garage for the Charge Point charger, and now we are seeing mouse droppings.  I had them in a different room before, and managed to find where they were coming in a few weeks ago.  They have not been in that room for about 2 months now.  I am on DH to close up where he cut the wall open.  

Have to work on cleaning up my entry way this week and my dining room table which has been serving as a desk for several months b/c next week will be Trick or Treat.  You can see right into my dining room as you walk up the walkway outside.  This is good for me.  I need it gone for Turkey Day.

Have lots to do at work too, so I need to get to work.