what are you doing right now?

[minnesotapaintlady]

Oct 4, 2023 7:32:25 GMT -5 notagain said:

mpl only 1 car with insurance?

Yes, the other two are liability only. 

[raeoflyte]

Oct 4, 2023 7:11:16 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Yay! I was told yesterday, that I won't be sharing a room with DD2's MIL, when we go to Disneyland, next week, after all.

I am once again, happy about going on this trip. Although I know there will be some little issues (feel bads) for me, because she and I have such different personalities. She says what she wants, without considering other people, IMO and I try to go with the flow and be agreeable. So she gets her way a lot, which bothers me. But at least I'm not going to be alone with her. Not much, anyway.

I'm going to DD2's this morning, to try and get my Disability Access Service. We tried to get it online yesterday, but there was a 5 hour wait in the queue, which would have put us at midnight and they close at 9 or 10.

Wish me luck!

I'm so glad you don't have to share a room with her and I hope the trip is overall so much fun that you barely notice her. If possible.

[countrygirl2]

Feel better this morning but the arm where he gave me the shot still hurts, its still warm and a bit swollen, and sore up the neck on that side, hoping that goes away by tomorrow. Hubs got the pneumonia and RSV and he is fine.

Taking DD to heart doc this afternoon, about all that is on the agenda today.

Hubs is working on my  backup camera, it comes and goes like a short is in it. He thinks it might be the camera in back and if so can be replaced for a couple hundred dollars. The dealership fixed my one tire sensor that wasn't working, so get this fixed and all is good again. I sure miss a backup camera working all the time.

Hubs slept till 6 this morning, unusual for my hubs. He slept well last night, many times he tosses and turns all night. 

[toomuchreality]

Oct 4, 2023 8:06:42 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

Oct 4, 2023 7:11:16 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Yay! I was told yesterday, that I won't be sharing a room with DD2's MIL, when we go to Disneyland, next week, after all.

I am once again, happy about going on this trip. Although I know there will be some little issues (feel bads) for me, because she and I have such different personalities. She says what she wants, without considering other people, IMO and I try to go with the flow and be agreeable. So she gets her way a lot, which bothers me. But at least I'm not going to be alone with her. Not much, anyway.

I'm going to DD2's this morning, to try and get my Disability Access Service. We tried to get it online yesterday, but there was a 5 hour wait in the queue, which would have put us at midnight and they close at 9 or 10.

Wish me luck!

I'm so glad you don't have to share a room with her and I hope the trip is overall so much fun that you barely notice her. If possible.

Thank you, so much! I hope that's how it goes, also! 😊

[andi9899]

Oct 3, 2023 16:08:02 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

For reasons I won’t get into, I need to revisit something.

I actually went back and read my posts. On 9/29, I posted about being upset that Boy tore up the comforter on my bed. 2 days later, on 10/1, I posted that I had some issues with a coworker at work that day, then about how I didn’t get much sleep the night before because I woke up a couple hours after I first went to sleep. Some hours later, right after I finally managed to drift off to sleep again, Boy woke me up, and kept doing random stuff so that I could not sleep, which went on until I had to get up for work. By the time I posted that evening on 10/1, I was tired and grumpy, and while talking about not having had any sleep, I said I was starting to not like Boy.

By the time I read some posts the next day, which was yesterday, and started defending myself about having said I was starting to not like Boy, he and I were already buddies again. I even said in one post where I was defending myself, that he was curled up at my feet. Which actually meant practically laying on my feet, to the point, I stayed where I was for a while, so I wouldn’t wake him up.

I guess I’m the only person in the world that gets aggravated and vents about temporary feelings regarding a source of aggravation. Feelings so temporary, in this instance, that they didn’t even last 24 hours. Feelings that I didn’t even act on, in any way, because even though Boy was on my nerves, I knew that he doesn’t purposefully aggravate me, he’s just a dog, and a young one at that.  He is still learning and lot of stuff he does, is because he just doesn’t know any better yet, and a lot of that is our fault, which I have repeatedly acknowledged when I bitch about him being a PITA. 

I know that most of you were understanding, because you know or can imagine how puppies can be frustrating sometimes, have read enough of my posts to believe that I genuinely love dogs (more than most people, in fact) and would never mistreat my own dog, or for whatever reason that led you to not judge me harshly……  and I appreciate that. And to those posters, I apologize for even bringing it up again.

But there is a reason I brought it up again, publicly. I will leave it at that.

Except to say that maybe I should start viewing persistently offensive people like I view untrained dogs that don’t know how to act, and consider that maybe they just don’t know any better either. 

You do not have to justify yourself to a hater. I do like the term persistently offensive people though. I will have to start using it.

Anyone who knows anything about dogs know that they're assholes for the first few years. It's just what you deal with when you have a puppy. Hell, the twins are 7 yo and they still piss me off.

[andi9899]

Oct 3, 2023 16:35:04 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Well he's gone. My dad is at the nursing home dealing with paperwork.

I will take off Thursday to go with him.to tell grandma.

What a mess.

I'm sorry. I hope grandma does OK with the news.

[countrygirl2]

Hubs is being optimistic that we can spend about $500k for a house in Washington, depends on what our last rental will sell for and this house of course.  And we can sell the mobile up there also, we have fixed it up so should do well on that sale when the time comes. Than still give some money to son to pay on his house. Maybe not the full amount but a chunk. I'm not sure I want to spend that much when we already have a place to live up there in a nice community.

Houses in good condition are selling well here. I thought they would. I am guessing we can get near $100k for his folks house. We have to put in 2 new garage doors, a walk in door and replace 2 of the windows. But it is a block garage, house and garage has metal roofs and the house is bedford stone. We put a new kitchen in it some time ago. It could use a new window in the laundry room, the rest are new.

I think one of the new carpets we put in is ruined. The renters stupid brother brought in parts off a motorcycle to work on, on the carpet!!! On new carpet, he ended up running his brother off, he was also a disruption to the neighbors. 

So far things are moving along nicely, can't sell anymore houses this year, taxes already high I think, and an issue I fear, and medicare premiums in 2 years.


 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 4, 2023 9:09:12 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Oct 3, 2023 16:35:04 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Well he's gone. My dad is at the nursing home dealing with paperwork.

I will take off Thursday to go with him.to tell grandma.

What a mess.

I'm sorry. I hope grandma does OK with the news.

I am going to imagine not she's spent her entire life taking care of him.  My brother and I speculated, and I believe my dad is thinking too that she may not be too far behind him after we deliver the news.

BUT that depends I suppose on if she remembers we told her.  She retains that my mom is gone.  But we'll be talking about that then she mentions she hopes grandpa is going to visit and he's been gone since 2014.  I cannot tell if her short term memory is going, her long term or a combination of both. 

Bob said she had a hard time remembering him the last time he was up there but that could also be because he doesn't visit often and she doesn't always wear her glasses.  She may not have realized it was him at first.  She recognizes me when I visit.

We'll see I guess.  Waiting for dad to decide if he wants to go up there tomorrow or Friday.  I already have a half day on Friday I can bump when I leave up earlier take a 3/4 day or something so I can go out there with him before he needs to open the restaurant.   It doesn't matter to me I just need to know the plan.  I said if he wants to kick the can down the road a couple more days I understand and support him.

[chiver78]

Oct 4, 2023 8:38:29 GMT -5 countrygirl2 said:

Feel better this morning but the arm where he gave me the shot still hurts, its still warm and a bit swollen, and sore up the neck on that side, hoping that goes away by tomorrow. Hubs got the pneumonia and RSV and he is fine.

Taking DD to heart doc this afternoon, about all that is on the agenda today.

Hubs is working on my  backup camera, it comes and goes like a short is in it. He thinks it might be the camera in back and if so can be replaced for a couple hundred dollars. The dealership fixed my one tire sensor that wasn't working, so get this fixed and all is good again. I sure miss a backup camera working all the time.

Hubs slept till 6 this morning, unusual for my hubs. He slept well last night, many times he tosses and turns all night. 

mine's been doing that on and off the past couple of years. irritating, but not the end of the world for me. turns out, it's on manufacturer's recall for exactly this. the notice says "The rearview camera wiring harness may become damaged due to the improper design of the harness fastener. As a result, the rearview camera may display a distorted or flickering image." 

have DH check that out as well, in case it's not the camera itself. 

[steph08]

drama - sorry for your loss

countrygirl - I'm sorry for your DH's diagnosis and hopes everything turns out OK, especially since it seems to have reminded him that he can't live forever and is motivating him to finally move to be closer to your son/DIL/grandson.

pink - no need for apologies. We all have temporary feelings that we shouldn't be held to for the rest of our lives. Our 12yo beagle is a PITA and I curse her existence often (she eats things/pukes them everywhere if we don't remember to close every single door in the house when we leave), but that doesn't mean I'd ever get rid of her or hurt her. 

TMR - have a great trip to Disneyland!

andi - good luck with the move!

[andi9899]

Oct 3, 2023 19:43:40 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Mister has been doing most of the grocery shopping for a while now. And when I did buy groceries, I was shopping sales, and only bought what was on sale for a good price. 

Last night, Mister started making a grocery list, and I told him I’d just go to the grocery store so he wouldn’t have to fool with making a order and picking it up or whatever. 

We were out of all kinds of stuff, including toilet paper. Mister is obsessed with making sure we have plenty of toilet paper, and only a certain brand, so the fact that I took the roll out of the guest bathroom and put it in our en suite bathroom last night, says a LOT about the state of our household. So I also made a Target run this morning. I didn’t order on,Ime for pickup, because since the last pandemic, for whatever reason, I couldn’t order Northern tissue online, even after it started being in stock in the store again. But even though you couldn’t order it on,ine for pickup, it was still available inside the store. Which is why I shopped in store today, for all of the household stuff we needed. Only to discover that they don’t sell Northern tissue at all anymore, so I could’ve saved myself some time and made an online order for pickup instead of walking through the store, tryingto find everything else on my list.

Then I went to the grocery store, because I no longer trust them to pick my produce and meat for me, after years of it not being a problem. I was ordering stuff for pickup, at Target and the grocery store, for a few years before the pandemic even happened. And until 2 or 3 years ago, I’d never had an issue with the produce or meat I got in my grocery orders.

Anyway, because I’ve on,y shopped sales IRT groceries for a while now, I experienced some serious sticker shock trying buy what Mister had on his list. I know people have been talking about the increased costs of groceries, and I was already aware of how expensive some things have gotten, but the increased prices still hadn’t really hit home for me because when I did buy groceries lately, it’s been only what was on sale.

When I saw the prices of someof the stuff Mister had on his list, I seriously got flustered and wayyy off track. Half the stuff on his list, I said “fuck that, I’m not paying that much for that”, because it wasn’t on sale, and the regular price was outrageous. So I mostly bailed on Mister’s list and bought what was on sale, that we use regularly. Which still wasn’t much. I only had my wallet, and for a few reasons, I don’t even usually carry cards in my wallet. I am technologically challenged, but I have become a fan of using Apple Pay on my phone when I am out and about, unless I am going somewhere that I know I need a card. Mister had sent me some money to pay for everything, through Apple Pay, but the grocery store does not take those kind of “wallet” payments. I had some cash, my total was almost $157, more than I expected. I had $155 in bills, so I was looking like a fool, counting out coins in my wallet to pay for my purchase, since I didn’t have a card to slide, and they aren’t set up for stuff like Apple Pay.

I wasn’t even embarrassed that I was digging out and counting change to try to have enough money, I was still too flustered and bent out of shape about the prices to be embarrassed.

As soon as I got in the Jeep after putting the groceries in the back, I called Mister and told him do not EVER send me to the grocery store like that, let me keep shopping the way I shop, buying what’s on sale. I went on a rant, which wasn’t really directed at him, I was just saying. A bag of potatoes, and we eat a lot of potatoes, cost 10 FREAKING DOLLARS.  I told him that in the FB gardening groups I’m in, some people say they don’t bother growing potatoes because they are cheap to buy. WHERE? Because they aren’t cheap here anymore Imo. Especially not, since we eat a lot of them.

I told Mister that my sticker shock today made me want to grow the vegetables we eat a lot of, even more. I explained that even if I buy seeds to get started, if I learn how to save seeds from what I grow, those vegetables will eventually only cost some time and effort, and not money. Then I asked him, do we have more money than time? And he said he doesn’t know, he’s never thiught about things from that perspective.

I said, well you need to think about it, because even if you feel like we have plenty of money, it still doesn’t make sense to me to pay more for stuff that we have to. So Imma need you to get on board with shopping sales and stocking our kitchen and deep freezer that way, instead of just buying random shit at random times, at full price. And people have been talking for a few years now about concerns about our food supply. If WE commit to at least learning to grow the vegetables we eat a lot of it is worth it imo, because we have more control over the chemicals we use or don’t use, vs commercial growers, and if nothing else, the things I’ve managed to grow, we’ve already learned, is a whole different world as far as taste, compared to what we are use to buying. And I guess if the world falls apart and we have learned to enough and have saved our own seeds, we might be able to at least feed ourselves enough to survive. 

So far, my desire to learn how to grow stuff was just something to do, and me wanting to be like my Grandmother. But more and more, especially after my grocery shopping today, I am starting to feel like it might be something important that I need to learn. 

I told Mister that after I got sidetracked, I bought some seasonings that we use a lot, because they were BOGO. He said, too bad you can’t grow them too. I said WHAT?! We have some herbs that we use for seasoning, growing on the deck and in the backyard. Rosemary, oregano and basil, to be exact. There is no real reason for us to buy that stuff, when it’s right outside our door, but we do. I have grown rosemary for a few years, just because I like it, and I planted the basil and oregano as companion plants this year, in an effort to help deter pests from my vegetables. 

I haven’t been serious about harvesting and drying it or whatever for future use, because everything I’ve been trying to learn and do has been a LOT. And if this is going to be a thing, I am okay with learning and figuring things out, and doing most of the work, but  Imma still need some help. So do we have more money, or more time? And even if we have plenty of money to provide a comfortable lifestyle, what is the best use of it? Does it make sense to keep spending $7 or $8 on stuff that we regularly use, but is also literally growing on our deck right outside the door to the deck, AND in our yard, less than 20 feet away from the house? I guess it depends. My point is that there are still choices to make, because even with our income, we still are nowhere near wealthy.

Do you not have an Aldi in your area? I get the majority of my groceries from there. I make up the difference at Sam's. T2 eats more than all of us combined, so I have to save where I can.

[bean29]

Drama - I missed that GU passed yesterday.  My Condolences, and hopefully everything will work out with the Miller Trust.  

TMR- have a great time at Disneyland.

Andi - Good luck with your Move...it sounds like you have everything under control, but I myself never manage to be organized enough. 

I have to send off an e-mail to our accountant.  I am dressed for the weather today.  We should hit a high of 78 today (very unusual for October in Wisconsin).  A slight chance of rain.  I am wearing sandals, but I brought a pair of sneakers too.  





 

[andi9899]

So the people who lived in the house behind mine moved out a couple of weeks ago. They left the door wide open. We suspected that someone was squatting there because sometimes the door is open and sometimes it's not. My aunt said she saw a man with an afro go into the house. The man that lived there before had dreads, not an afro. So there must be someone squatting there.

I've been following T2 to the car at night to make sure my janky gate is latched right. I'm going to keep doing it and watching for someone around that house to make sure she's safe. 3 more days and we're blowing this pop stand!

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Shot the Medicaid lady a quick email.  Her answer won't be the be all end all dad is going to consult with attorneys over all this but I figure she may have seen this situation before.

My dad is pulling his hair out worried this is going to fuck up everything with grandma.  He's all naturally worried that he's going to end up making another mistake and get himself or me in trouble.

My question is can the state of Iowa force a claim to GU's estate on behalf of grandma?   I would not be shocked if they could the system is set up to ring every single penny out of someone so I would imagine they can go after a relative's estate and claim it has to go to her to pay them back for Medicaid.

But IDK.  

I figure maybe she can give me enough information I can keep dad from shitting kittens over it for a little while.  I assured him we have help now, we're not doing this alone, she can help me sort this all out for grandma.  That's what I'm paying $2k for.

I just don't have the brain space. I've shut down again.   I need to make sure I focus on doing my job and plowing ahead with getting all the paperwork I need to get for her application.  I can't worry about GU's estate right now.

I am helping with finding pallbearers.  Bob has agreed to be one and so has DH.  We need another two.  There are two former coworkers of mine/my dad's that worked at the restaurant for decades who we are planning to ask.  If they can't do it I might ask my friend if her sons can.  She worked for GU and they worked for my dad.

[mollyanna58]

I am sorry for your loss, NomoreDramaQ1015, and for all the problems GU's death may cause.  

The funeral home can probably supply pallbearers if there are not enough family members and friends available.

[debthaven]

I'm sorry NomoreDramaQ1015 . Your family can't seem to get a break.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 4, 2023 10:18:15 GMT -5 mollyanna58 said:

I am sorry for your loss, NomoreDramaQ1015 , and for all the problems GU's death may cause.  

The funeral home can probably supply pallbearers if there are not enough family members and friends available.

There should be.   GU was part of the community in the area for a long time.  There are a lot of us who worked for/with him over the decades.  I want to at least extend that offer to those people first.

I knew my brother would want to.  No way would I not ask my brother first.

[toomuchreality]

Oct 4, 2023 9:27:22 GMT -5 steph08 said:

drama - sorry for your loss

countrygirl - I'm sorry for your DH's diagnosis and hopes everything turns out OK, especially since it seems to have reminded him that he can't live forever and is motivating him to finally move to be closer to your son/DIL/grandson.

pink - no need for apologies. We all have temporary feelings that we shouldn't be held to for the rest of our lives. Our 12yo beagle is a PITA and I curse her existence often (she eats things/pukes them everywhere if we don't remember to close every single door in the house when we leave), but that doesn't mean I'd ever get rid of her or hurt her. 

TMR - have a great trip to Disneyland!

andi - good luck with the move!

♡❤♡

[daisylu]

Made some fresh guacamole. Now I'm stuffing my face.

[andi9899]

Oct 4, 2023 10:28:13 GMT -5 daisylu said:

Made some fresh guacamole. Now I'm stuffing my face.

I made some last night. T2 was loving life.

[seriousthistime]

Oct 4, 2023 9:52:23 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Shot the Medicaid lady a quick email.  Her answer won't be the be all end all dad is going to consult with attorneys over all this but I figure she may have seen this situation before.

My dad is pulling his hair out worried this is going to fuck up everything with grandma.  He's all naturally worried that he's going to end up making another mistake and get himself or me in trouble.

My question is can the state of Iowa force a claim to GU's estate on behalf of grandma?   I would not be shocked if they could the system is set up to ring every single penny out of someone so I would imagine they can go after a relative's estate and claim it has to go to her to pay them back for Medicaid.

But IDK.  

I figure maybe she can give me enough information I can keep dad from shitting kittens over it for a little while.  I assured him we have help now, we're not doing this alone, she can help me sort this all out for grandma.  That's what I'm paying $2k for.

I just don't have the brain space. I've shut down again.   I need to make sure I focus on doing my job and plowing ahead with getting all the paperwork I need to get for her application.  I can't worry about GU's estate right now.

I am helping with finding pallbearers.  Bob has agreed to be one and so has DH.  We need another two.  There are two former coworkers of mine/my dad's that worked at the restaurant for decades who we are planning to ask.  If they can't do it I might ask my friend if her sons can.  She worked for GU and they worked for my dad.

Let me reason through this out loud here.  

When GU passed, his assets were no longer his.  In that instant, they became assets of his estate.  The estate still needs to be settled.  You have to go through the process to do that. Your dad may need to go to court to be appointed the executor or administrator of the estate. The next of kin needs to be established, and the estate may need to go through probate.  Part of that process is publishing a legal notice in the paper notifying any of GU's creditors they must file a claim against the estate within a certain number of months. Then the executor/administrator needs to pay those claims and file an accounting of all assets.  After the court approves the accounting, the assets can be distributed to the heirs.

Your grandma does not own that asset until the proceeds are distributed to her.  That will take months. (My stepfather's estate took a year and a half, and he had a will.) THEN, Iowa has a claim on those assets because they belong to grandma.  Iowa can't force a claim to GU's estate, as far as I know.  But once those assets belong to grandma, they are forcing a claim on her assets, not his. 

Until the proceeds are distributed to grandma, she has an expectancy of inheritance.  I don't know of any way for Iowa to go after an expectancy in this situation, but maybe there is. 

I'm just trying to reason my way through this so don't count on this as gospel.  These are good questions to ask the lawyer, Medicaid rep, etc. Ask them about the process to settle an estate without a will.  If you think grandma is frail and Iowa Medicaid is paying for her nursing home, time is on your side (not to be morbid but I think you get my drift).  

Best of luck.  And so sorry you have had yet another loss.

[minnesotapaintlady]

I should be an insurance adjuster.  Told everyone at work it was probably $1000 headlight.  Got the estimate, it was $1058 for the headlight.  Total estimate including labor for removing the front bumper (only way to change the headlight) and some scuff painting.  $2500.  Good lord.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 4, 2023 12:22:37 GMT -5 seriousthistime said:

Oct 4, 2023 9:52:23 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

Shot the Medicaid lady a quick email.  Her answer won't be the be all end all dad is going to consult with attorneys over all this but I figure she may have seen this situation before.

My dad is pulling his hair out worried this is going to fuck up everything with grandma.  He's all naturally worried that he's going to end up making another mistake and get himself or me in trouble.

My question is can the state of Iowa force a claim to GU's estate on behalf of grandma?   I would not be shocked if they could the system is set up to ring every single penny out of someone so I would imagine they can go after a relative's estate and claim it has to go to her to pay them back for Medicaid.

But IDK.  

I figure maybe she can give me enough information I can keep dad from shitting kittens over it for a little while.  I assured him we have help now, we're not doing this alone, she can help me sort this all out for grandma.  That's what I'm paying $2k for.

I just don't have the brain space. I've shut down again.   I need to make sure I focus on doing my job and plowing ahead with getting all the paperwork I need to get for her application.  I can't worry about GU's estate right now.

I am helping with finding pallbearers.  Bob has agreed to be one and so has DH.  We need another two.  There are two former coworkers of mine/my dad's that worked at the restaurant for decades who we are planning to ask.  If they can't do it I might ask my friend if her sons can.  She worked for GU and they worked for my dad.

Let me reason through this out loud here.  

When GU passed, his assets were no longer his.  In that instant, they became assets of his estate.  The estate still needs to be settled.  You have to go through the process to do that. Your dad may need to go to court to be appointed the executor or administrator of the estate. The next of kin needs to be established, and the estate may need to go through probate.  Part of that process is publishing a legal notice in the paper notifying any of GU's creditors they must file a claim against the estate within a certain number of months. Then the executor/administrator needs to pay those claims and file an accounting of all assets.  After the court approves the accounting, the assets can be distributed to the heirs.

Your grandma does not own that asset until the proceeds are distributed to her.  That will take months. (My stepfather's estate took a year and a half, and he had a will.) THEN, Iowa has a claim on those assets because they belong to grandma.  Iowa can't force a claim to GU's estate, as far as I know.  But once those assets belong to grandma, they are forcing a claim on her assets, not his. 

Until the proceeds are distributed to grandma, she has an expectancy of inheritance.  I don't know of any way for Iowa to go after an expectancy in this situation, but maybe there is. 

I'm just trying to reason my way through this so don't count on this as gospel.  These are good questions to ask the lawyer, Medicaid rep, etc. Ask them about the process to settle an estate without a will.  If you think grandma is frail and Iowa Medicaid is paying for her nursing home, time is on your side (not to be morbid but I think you get my drift).  

Best of luck.  And so sorry you have had yet another loss.

The Medicaid lady pointed us to a state service my dad can use and will probably be his best bet to get answers.  It doesn't help that we are dealing with two different states with their own rules regarding inheritance and Medicaid.

[gs11rmb]

NomoreDramaQ1015 what happens if you do nothing?  If there isn't a will, can't you just let the state be responsible for settling the estate?  Whatever is left over will then go to your grandma and then to pay her bills.

Why do you and your dad need to be involved with this paperwork?  It sounds as though your grandma is physically pretty healthy and likely to live for a quite a while longer so why turn yourselves inside out to try and preserve an inheritance that will only be used to pay for her care.

[seriousthistime]

Good!  You have some ideas of what to ask, and the state service will be far lighter on the costs.  If you think of it, report back here about what they say, it could be helpful to others. 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Oct 4, 2023 12:41:05 GMT -5 gs11rmb said:

NomoreDramaQ1015 what happens if you do nothing?  If there isn't a will, can't you just let the state be responsible for settling the estate?  Whatever is left over will then go to your grandma and then to pay her bills.

Why do you and your dad need to be involved with this paperwork?  It sounds as though your grandma is physically pretty healthy and likely to live for a quite a while longer so why turn yourselves inside out to try and preserve an inheritance that will only be used to pay for her care.

I have to be involved as her POA. My main concern was him dying right before we apply might interfere with her application.  She will be out of money by the end of November so yes she still will need Medicaid.  GUs estate could take a year or more to settle, she needs to pay her bills now.

My dad is my GU's POA.  He still has to settle with Nebraska Medicaid, the nursing home and Omaha.  He needs to find out if he's still expected to sell the house or are we supposed to not touch it now.  

Iowa Medicaid and Nebraska Medicaid have their own rules.  The states also have their own rules regarding inheritance.  My dad already got his ass handed to him once by not realizing advice he got only applied to Nebraska.  Not going there again.

We do not give a flying fuck if we get anything I want to make that clear.  I would happily burn the house down to the ground.

The Medicaid lady said I am not to do anything or disclose anything regarding my grandmother until the estate is closed.  If I don't have a check there is no money to disclose.  So don't borrow trouble. We'll deal with that when/if the time comes.

So that is what I am going to do.  My priority was to make sure that GU's lack of decision making doesn't come back to haunt my grandma from the grave.  We've had enough messes to clean up thanks to them.  We don't need the house to end up being another one.

Dad will talk to the department for estate settlement so we make sure every I is dotted and every T is crossed.

[daisylu]

Today DH is off work today. He ran a couple of errands and came home complaining about how much stuff costs, especially beef. Where you been?

It is $100 dollars every time I get groceries just for basics like bread, english muffins, yogurt, fresh fruit, fresh vegetables, bottled water, and distilled water for the humidifier. I did grab some ground beef and ground ribeye(for hamburgers) this week because it was on sale and we are out, which added another $65 to the total but loaded the freezer for a while.

Plus side is that he will be grilling tonight, likely the last of the year. The weekend dips into the upper 50s, and hunting season starts Saturday.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

And speaking of paperwork found out my grandparents DID NOT apply for the military discount to property taxes you get with the DD214.  My dad checked their last statement.  So going through the county is out.

Sometimes I swear she did this all on purpose.  There is just no way it's all a coincidence. 

I mean REALLY?!  She was so cheap that they moved out to Treynor despite all of us telling her it was a bad idea because the property taxes were cheaper out there than here.  You're telling me she didn't see the benefit of getting even more shaved off by using grandpa's military service?  REALLY?!

ETA: OMG something finally went my way.  They could not talk to me about specific details of the account till they get my POA on file but the bank who holds grandpa's pension was able to walk me through how to get onto their web site and create an account and confirm I do have the correct details without actually giving me the account #.  I can now finally take care of that. 

[andi9899]

Oct 4, 2023 13:37:11 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

And speaking of paperwork found out my grandparents DID NOT apply for the military discount to property taxes you get with the DD214.  My dad checked their last statement.  So going through the county is out.

Sometimes I swear she did this all on purpose.  There is just no way it's all a coincidence. 

I mean REALLY?!  She was so cheap that they moved out to Treynor despite all of us telling her it was a bad idea because the property taxes were cheaper out there than here.  You're telling me she didn't see the benefit of getting even more shaved off by using grandpa's military service?  REALLY?!

When this is finally over, you need to take a trip and do something fun. Hell, I'll pay for you to stay here for a weekend if you want and get you into all kinds of (the good kind) trouble.

[andi9899]

I'm so over today. I couldn't for the life of me find a quote I did yesterday. I searched every which way to get it. So I call Progressive to tell them their portal is crap and figure out that it's me that's the problem. I was looking for a FL quote in the TX part of their site. What an idiot! The Progressive guy thought it was hilarious.