what are you doing right now?

[toomuchreality]

Sept 13, 2023 17:57:58 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

So my rant is about the cemetery. I told y’all Mister paid an extra $400 due to his request that his Dad be buried as close to his Mom as possible. The day we were at the cemetery and paid them, the lady helping us looked at the plots on her computer and said that the space directly in front of his Mom was available. Great! Even though I don’t know why that cost $400.

So today, after the ceremony at the cemetery was done, somebody went looking for Mister’s Mom’s grave. We saw the freshly dug hole for his Dad, so she should be close, right? Then Mister told me that the cemetery had called him and changed the location for his Dad, one spot over from the one directly in front of his Mom. By then, about 10 people were looking for his Mom’s grave. She doesn’t have a tombstone yet, we were told it could take up to a year for it to be made and placed.

So Mister and I drove around to the office, asking where was his Mom’s grave. I’m not even gon fuss about what an ordeal that was. So they printed off the plots and had us follow someone back out to the site, so they could show us where her grave was. Except the spot marked on the paper had some flowers and a temporary marker withs someone else’s name on it. TF?! By then, Mister’s Dad’s casket had been put in the ground and a crew was refilling the hole. So the young lady we followed and one of the men from that crew, determined that Mom’s grave had to be directly in front of where they were burying Mister’s Dad. I was appalled and before I could stop myself, I said “so basically nobody knows WHERE she is, right?” 

I was already looking crazy because I was taught that it’s disrespectful to walk on people’s graves. But they have the graves packed so closely together, that there are no paths and no way to avoid walking on people’s graves. That’s bad enough, but to not even know exactly where someone is buried, because what their computers show doesn’t match what’s actually out there? How the fuck is that okay?

I was really upset and outraged about that, but I didn’t want to further upset Mister or his brother, because Brother had hung around for us to come back from the office, so I dialed it back. The employees out there weren’t the correct people to raise hell with anyway. The young lady that went out there with us said she’d make sure the ladies in the office corrected it in the computer. I have zero confidence in that happening. 

I'm so sorry, you have one more thing to deal with.
After the ordeal we went through, after my mom died, I'm not totally surprised. Although we at least knew where my mom was.
I hope it gets figured out soon, with some sort of assurance.

I'm glad the funeral went well.

Hugs ♡

[Pink Cashmere]

Please feel free to ignore me, because this is another rant.

Kiddo’s Mom insisted Mister come get Kiddo so he could ride with us to the funeral. We did not have limos this time. When we got there to pick Kiddo up, his Mom and whoever she was riding with, were all sitting in the car, waiting on us. To go to the same darn place! Kiddo got out of that car, and in the car with us. They literally pulled off right behind us. Going to the same darn place!

I can understand her wanting Kiddo to be acknowledged as part of the family, and sit with his Dad and sisters and the rest of the family. But Brother’s ex-wife didn’t insist he come get their daughter. She just made sure she got there on time, and their daughter walked in with the rest of the grandchildren. 

Idk why it was so important to Kiddo’s Mom to have Mister go out of his way to pick Kiddo up. When we left the church, Kiddo and Brother’s daughter rode with me and Mister, because they like being around each other. That was fine. I just didn’t understand the first part, Mister picking Kiddo up on the way to the funeral. Mister was agitated about it, I told him I was the one driving, we’d pick Kiddo up and still make it to the church in plenty of time, so just chill out. I kept my confusion to myself lol.

Why make things more complicated for Mister TODAY, the day of his Dad’s funeral, right behind his Mom’s funeral earlier this year?!

Then, at the cemetery, Kiddo’s Mom told Mister, “he’s going with you”. Mister said okay. What else is he gonna say, when Kiddo is his child.  But OD and YD ended up taking Kiddo and Brother’s daughter with them, because the little ones like hanging out with the older ones. Mister gave OD some money and they went to Texas Roadhouse to eat. 

Before Kiddo’s Mom left the cemetery she was fussing over Kiddo and saying “you need a breathing treatment” and I caught OD’s eye, and she looked away after rolling her eyes lol. After Kiddo’s Mom finally walked off, OD told me “Ain’t nothing wrong with this  boy except his Momma”. 

[daisylu]

Sept 13, 2023 18:16:42 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I made sweet potato apple soup it's really good!

Recipe?

[toomuchreality]

In your opinion, what is a reasonable number of times per day, as well as length of time, a person living in an apt should have to listen to drums being played in another apt?

Supposedly, it is an 8yr old learning to play and practicing.
Clearly, both the son and his father bang on them. I was told he would practice 1/2 hr per day.
I could deal with that. His dad has been 'playing' for the last hour.

[Opti]

Sept 13, 2023 18:27:28 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Please feel free to ignore me, because this is another rant.

Kiddo’s Mom insisted Mister come get Kiddo so he could ride with us to the funeral. We did not have limos this time. When we got there to pick Kiddo up, his Mom and whoever she was riding with, were all sitting in the car, waiting on us. To go to the same darn place! Kiddo got out of that car, and in the car with us. They literally pulled off right behind us. Going to the same darn place!

I can understand her wanting Kiddo to be acknowledged as part of the family, and sit with his Dad and sisters and the rest of the family. But Brother’s ex-wife didn’t insist he come get their daughter. She just made sure she got there on time, and their daughter walked in with the rest of the grandchildren. 

Idk why it was so important to Kiddo’s Mom to have Mister go out of his way to pick Kiddo up. When we left the church, Kiddo and Brother’s daughter rode with me and Mister, because they like being around each other. That was fine. I just didn’t understand the first part, Mister picking Kiddo up on the way to the funeral. Mister was agitated about it, I told him I was the one driving, we’d pick Kiddo up and still make it to the church in plenty of time, so just chill out. I kept my confusion to myself lol.

Why make things more complicated for Mister TODAY, the day of his Dad’s funeral, right behind his Mom’s funeral earlier this year?!

Then, at the cemetery, Kiddo’s Mom told Mister, “he’s going with you”. Mister said okay. What else is he gonna say, when Kiddo is his child.  But OD and YD ended up taking Kiddo and Brother’s daughter with them, because the little ones like hanging out with the older ones. Mister gave OD some money and they went to Texas Roadhouse to eat. 

Before Kiddo’s Mom left the cemetery she was fussing over Kiddo and saying “you need a breathing treatment” and I caught OD’s eye, and she looked away after rolling her eyes lol. After Kiddo’s Mom finally walked off, OD told me “Ain’t nothing wrong with this  boy except his Momma”. 

Sorry about the momma drama. 

[daisylu]

Interesting text from former coworker who still works at the facility today.

She filed another ethics complaint against her (and my former manager) with corporate HR. I know of at least 5 that have been filed from different people in the last year, but this one borders on illegal (think Sorbanes Oxley, Enron type stuff). She had texted me Saturday about that and other issues and I told her that she would need concrete info. She had it and filed a complaint Monday.

I kind of want to get involved but also don't. Instead I sent her contact info of people in corporate who can assist and answer her questions.

Honestly, I want those people to go down in flames. But I hate that it might come at the expense of the facility - which is already close to be being on the chopping block. 🥺

[NastyWoman]

Sept 13, 2023 17:30:49 GMT -5 The Walk of the Penguin Mich said:

Sept 13, 2023 17:18:49 GMT -5 chiver78 said:

I have some questions as I start to tie up loose ends in advance of leaving my current employer in the not-so-distant future. hoping nobody minds if I post about them here? doesn't seem worthy of its own thread.     I have direct deposit, so I don't often check the ADP site. 

1. vacation payout - are payroll taxes taken out on vacation payout upon severance? I just input the three days I need for a long weekend in a couple weeks to head to another music festival, and as of now still have three full weeks of vacation time with nothing else planned through year end. there's also 8 sick days, which I'd lose upon leaving. so those mental health days where I've really just had enough? those will be billed as sick days now. 

2. "adjustments" - what does this actually mean? I have a handful of these line items in my ADP ledger, all dated August 9th. various amounts are listed under "gross" and there's nothing under take-home. is this possibly related to stock transactions pertaining to a secondary bonus? the "gross" number isn't small, so I'm a little concerned. 

Yes.  I have always had payroll taxes taken out of my vacation pay.  It has been done each of 2 ways.  Once all my vacation was dumped into my last paycheck.  That meant whatever algorithm they use to calculate taxes assumed I made 2.5x the salary I did, and took out proportionally more taxes.  The other way, vacation was sent as a separate check.  

One thing you might want to check on, if you have not yet given notice is finding out how far in advance your healthcare is covered.  One job I had, if you worked one day in the month you were covered for the full month.  If your last day was the day earlier, your health insurance stopped then.  As a result, I (obviously) set my last day as the first of the month, started my new job a week later and had seamless health insurance.  As it turned out, all my other benefits (like vacation) were added the first day too so I scored another 2 days of pay since I was earning 5 weeks/year by then.

Your second item I’m clueless about.  Maybe call HR?

 and that is why I retired on December 3rd and not at TG. SS couldn't get my Medicare in place in the over 4 months I gave them so I covered December that way.

[daisylu]

Sept 13, 2023 18:35:15 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

In your opinion, what is a reasonable number of times per day, as well as length of time, a person living in an apt should have to listen to drums being played in another apt?

Supposedly, it is an 8yr old learning to play and practicing.
Clearly, both the son and his father bang on them. I was told he would practice 1/2 hr per day.
I could deal with that. His dad has been 'playing' for the last hour.

With apartment living, I feel like it ties into local noise ordinance rules. Unless the complex has other rules. Sorry.

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 13, 2023 18:35:15 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

In your opinion, what is a reasonable number of times per day, as well as length of time, a person living in an apt should have to listen to drums being played in another apt?

Supposedly, it is an 8yr old learning to play and practicing.
Clearly, both the son and his father bang on them. I was told he would practice 1/2 hr per day.
I could deal with that. His dad has been 'playing' for the last hour.

When we moved here, and I kept encouraging Mister to get his drums out of storage and bring them home, he kept warning me that they are loud. And they are. I kept telling him before he brought them home that I didn’t care how loud they are, and I still don’t care.

But that is my sweetie banging on some drums, not a neighbor. I am pretty sure I would not be as tolerant if it was a neighbor making all that noise. 

With me knowing how loud Mister’s drums are, and also knowing how sound in some apartments carry into other units, I would say there really isn’t a reasonable time, or amount of time, to make all that noise in an apartment. There are reasons Mister kept his drums in storage when he was living in an apartment. The same reason he kept warning me when I was encouraging him to bring them home after we bought a house…. he knows they are LOUD. But here, I can barely hear them if I’m at the other end of the house, and our neighbors definitely can’t hear them.

I’m sorry I don’t have a better answer. 

[minnesotapaintlady]

Sept 13, 2023 16:37:52 GMT -5 jerseygirl said:

Sept 13, 2023 15:39:47 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I love my freaking town.  At the gas station...

OMG so funny
Does the piggy have sunglasses?

I think they're goggles. 

Found out he's a therapy pig that goes to nursing homes.

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 13, 2023 17:38:52 GMT -5 countrygirl2 said:

We are very concerned with dementia on hubs side. His mom, her 2 brothers, and a sister, her grandma, and possibly her great grandmother had it. But I think a lot of MIL's was not eating right for over 10 years. I've said before it appeared she lived on cheap $1 pizzas and cheap ice cream. When I came up I would often take her food over. Hubs told me I bet she didn't eat any of it. Some I found in her freezer when cleaning it out, so he was right.  She would not cooperate with anything, nothing. She was in such a rut, not read, not change anything. You tried to talk to her, just over and over the same tired stuff. It was sad. She did walk everyday, but the good that did was undone by her poor eating habits.  Nothing could be done with her or her sister.

I have a high school friend from my class with Parkisons and possibly diabetes in a nursing home. It's a locked dementia unit. She did know me but I haven't been over there in 2 years. She had her moments, I was in there one day and she told me she wasn't doing well, then in a few minutes she slipped into knowing we both had to work. I want to go see her but not sure I can handle it. She and her husband had many many years of sickness but had decent jobs. They had a beautiful home and raised only one son. I heard he tries to get down and see his folks when he can. He is a pilot and ended up divorced, he had wanted them to move close to him so he could help them and they would not. Her husband still goes and sees her I think almost daily but he is quite ill too. At least we haven't ended up in a situation like that in our prime years, nor now, but I know we are slipping physically. Yet it could be so much worse. Long as I have my cognitive facilities and can remain mobile, that's good.

On my Mom’s side, my great grandmother had dementia, my grandmother had it, my Aunt (Mom’s sister) is in the early stages of it. I have no idea about my biological father’s side. 

On Mister’s side, his Dad’s oldest sister that I mentioned earlier, was the first to have it, but something was very clearly going on with his Dad too.

My Grandmother moved my Great Grandmother into her home and took care of her until she died. My Mom and my Aunt took care of my Grandmother until she died. My Aunt, who is in the early stages of dementia now, has a faithful husband who has been seeing after her. But he’s not quite as sharp as he use to be, and is starting to forget some stuff, so we aren’t sure how long that will be ok. 

My Mom, she’s not as sharp as she use to be, but she isn’t exhibiting signs of dementia, thank God. I know what the early signs look like, and they are different from what I’m seeing with my Mom so far. 

So with my family history, of course I am concerned about the odds that I will have dementia too at some point.

I don’t want that for myself, or for Mister, and not for my children and grandchildren.

I will repeat again what my Grandmother use to say “Getting old is a blessing, but it sure is UNconvenient”. 💔

During  Mr. Messy’s funeral today, it was said that he died from a broken heart. And I guess that’s true. He couldn’t imagine life without his wife, after having been with her for so long, and didn’t want to live without her. He said that to anybody that would listen, that he didn’t want to live after she was gone. 

I always thought that was selfish, but something that was said today gave me another perspective, and it’s something I barely understand myself, since I do call myself a Christian, so I imagine people that aren’t Christians won’t really get it either. And please understand that me saying that is not me knocking or disrespecting anyone that doesn’t believe as I try to, I am just acknowledging that everybody is not like me, which is okay with me.

But what was said today was that a faithful servant of God, does not fear death. Because death is just a transition, and not the end of life. Because there is eternal life for those of us that do certain things during our lives on earth. That helped me feel better about Mr. Messy constantly saying he wanted and was ready to die after Mister’s Mom passed.He was a whole mess for the last year or so, but who am I to judge what was really in his heart and whether or not he really was the kind of man he always intended to be. 

I do know a lot about the good things he did, that had ripple effects in his community and I know that he tried to raise his sons to be good, honorable men and he was there for them when they faltered.

I know that there has been some contention on the boards lately, and I don’t want to add to that. I am trying to share my thoughts, and still be respectful to others here that have different beliefs than I do. And if I messed that up somehow, please forgive me. I am open to different points of view, and I am open to honest conversation, but please, pretty please, let’s not argue and fight about different beliefs 

[TheOtherMe]

Pink       I don't feel well enough to say anything cognizant, but I will PM you when I feel better.

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 13, 2023 19:43:25 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Sept 13, 2023 16:37:52 GMT -5 jerseygirl said:

OMG so funny
Does the piggy have sunglasses?

I think they're goggles. 

Found out he's a therapy pig that goes to nursing homes.

I use to think I wanted a miniature pig for a pet. It’s my understanding that they can be even smarter than dogs. 

The vet that we started taking our dogs to last year, a couple of the employees have pet pigs. 

But Mister thinks I’m crazy for thinking I can share a home with a miniature pig, so I guess that’s not ever gonna happen. 

I don’t fuss about it, because I also got enchanted with small monkeys when I went to Mexico some years ago and wondered if I could live with them.

In my ideal world, I’d have some dogs, some cats, some monkeys, some miniature pigs, and some birds… from finches to parakeets, to parrots.

But my life isn’t set up like that, so I just have a couple of spoiled ass dogs. 

[Pink Cashmere]

Sept 13, 2023 20:19:20 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Pink       I don't feel well enough to say anything cognizant, but I will PM you when I feel better.

No worries. Just take care of yourself. I will be here to chat with when you are feeling better. 💕

[mollyanna58]

Sept 13, 2023 18:35:15 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

In your opinion, what is a reasonable number of times per day, as well as length of time, a person living in an apt should have to listen to drums being played in another apt?

Supposedly, it is an 8yr old learning to play and practicing.
Clearly, both the son and his father bang on them. I was told he would practice 1/2 hr per day.
I could deal with that. His dad has been 'playing' for the last hour.

My office is in a mixed use building. There is an apartment directly overhead.  There was a very talented boy living there for about a year.  He was a dancer whose family moved from FL to NJ so he could attend Julliard and a local, highly regarded dance studio.  A tap dancer.  Who practiced for an hour or more at a time.  Directly over my office.  I am pretty good at shutting out distracting noises but I have my limit.  I had the landlord explain that the kid couldn't practice during business hours, and that mostly took care of it.  

[raeoflyte]

My washing machine isn't draining. I will call the guy tomorrow and hope he can get us in quick, and hope it's an easy fix. But I'm freaking out. This is the straw. I don't think I can handle a laundromat with 2 jobs and lifting restrictions. Not to mention the bad effing timin to need to replace appliances.

[Pink Cashmere]

Aunt D called me and asked if we found Mister’s Mom’s grave. 

UGH! Because in my mind, we still don’t know exactly which one is hers. 

Mister has decided that he wants to cook a diner for his family Saturday. That’s fine by me, if that’s what he wants to do. But I work weekends, and I’ve not been a good employee this whole year, due to my own issues, so I’m not sure which way to go with that. 

I value family more than my job, but I also understand that my job pays the bills so I can provide for my family. 

So that’s just one more thing I have to figure out . 

And I wrote that like I really had options. Imma always choose myself and my loved ones over a job. I could and maybe “should” do a lot of things differently than I have and do sometimes, but when it’s all said and done, Imma take care of me and mine first and foremost, and Imma trust that doing that is a matter of faith, and relying on faith is a BFD. 

[countrygirl2]

This is a place we kind of like, close to son, he is on the other side of the lake, not far away. He said he would like it later and DIL would too. But we feel too much money and we are concerned about the artesian well being safe and reliable. Also a privacy fence will go up along the driveway, as the place on the other side doesn't look that great to us. The only other one on the market out there right now is gasp, $750k, way beyond our budget for sure. 

Son suggested getting the well tested and since the house has been on the market for almost a year that we low ball the price. But its really not big enough. It is cute though.

It's a thought and we could sell the other one we bought. 

Son and DIL likes the 92 ft of waterfront where we could put a boat dock.  But only walking access to the lake on that side and would have to  put the boat in from the other side which everyone there does.

Oh and it close to everything  just a few miles away from the mall. If you look straight across the lake that is where our current place is. I do like it there.

Interesting anyway.


www.lakehomes.com/washington/black-lake/4525-black-lake-sw-olympia-wa-98512-lhrmls-01734167

And son put us at ease that he could pay off his house with his savings and than some but doesn't want to take the money out. He also said he is wanting to spend nothing right now as he thinks the government may shut down and he has large house payments to pay so is keeping money back. Don't blame him a bit.  Hubs thinks the repubs might keep it shut down for a long time. Who knows, will sure hurt a lot of folks if that happens.

Watching a scary sic fi show. Whoa, now really getting scarey, ooooooh!!!!

[andi9899]

Sept 13, 2023 18:27:28 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Please feel free to ignore me, because this is another rant.

Kiddo’s Mom insisted Mister come get Kiddo so he could ride with us to the funeral. We did not have limos this time. When we got there to pick Kiddo up, his Mom and whoever she was riding with, were all sitting in the car, waiting on us. To go to the same darn place! Kiddo got out of that car, and in the car with us. They literally pulled off right behind us. Going to the same darn place!

I can understand her wanting Kiddo to be acknowledged as part of the family, and sit with his Dad and sisters and the rest of the family. But Brother’s ex-wife didn’t insist he come get their daughter. She just made sure she got there on time, and their daughter walked in with the rest of the grandchildren. 

Idk why it was so important to Kiddo’s Mom to have Mister go out of his way to pick Kiddo up. When we left the church, Kiddo and Brother’s daughter rode with me and Mister, because they like being around each other. That was fine. I just didn’t understand the first part, Mister picking Kiddo up on the way to the funeral. Mister was agitated about it, I told him I was the one driving, we’d pick Kiddo up and still make it to the church in plenty of time, so just chill out. I kept my confusion to myself lol.

Why make things more complicated for Mister TODAY, the day of his Dad’s funeral, right behind his Mom’s funeral earlier this year?!

Then, at the cemetery, Kiddo’s Mom told Mister, “he’s going with you”. Mister said okay. What else is he gonna say, when Kiddo is his child.  But OD and YD ended up taking Kiddo and Brother’s daughter with them, because the little ones like hanging out with the older ones. Mister gave OD some money and they went to Texas Roadhouse to eat. 

Before Kiddo’s Mom left the cemetery she was fussing over Kiddo and saying “you need a breathing treatment” and I caught OD’s eye, and she looked away after rolling her eyes lol. After Kiddo’s Mom finally walked off, OD told me “Ain’t nothing wrong with this  boy except his Momma”. 

This is my mom. She always has to find the most difficult way of doing things. It drives us all crazy.

When I started traveling for work again she would have the kids so pissed off when I got back about trying to coordinate who was letting my dogs out when. They're all in their 20s. I think all 4 of them can communicate efficiently enough to figure out who gets to let the out and then watch them poop. By the time I got back that first time all of them were so mad at her! They weren't going to say to grandma what I would say to mom, so I informed her that she didn't need to be involved in everything regardless of her opinion. So then she was mad at me for "yelling" at her.

All that to say is it could be worse. I deal with that too. Every. Single. Day.

[finnime]

Good morning, thoughtful and caring invisipeeps of Y Ma'am. Welcome to Thursday. I hope your day finds you making progress on your pilgrimage to a meaningful life, whatever that meaning entails.

The faith in which I was raised taught that the afterlife is real and visible in the lives you touch and legacy you leave behind. So, Mister's parents have a rich and sustaining afterlife, in family and all the others bearing witness to their impact. 

Today I need to get going on organizing my home better, with all the photos ready for shows and all the clothes ready for the change in season, plus miscellany. DD living here has prompted my attention. Good news yesterday, the neighbor whose house DD is renting will be vacating by October 1, so DD can move in then.

I don't know what impact Lee will have on my little town here on Buzzards Bay. We'll see. So far there is nothing to write about, not even a higher than usual wind, although a tropical storm watch is in effect. It's raining a little bit but NBD.

This was yesterday's sunrise over the bay:

[chiver78]

Sept 13, 2023 21:42:24 GMT -5 countrygirl2 said:

This is a place we kind of like, close to son, he is on the other side of the lake, not far away. He said he would like it later and DIL would too. But we feel too much money and we are concerned about the artesian well being safe and reliable. Also a privacy fence will go up along the driveway, as the place on the other side doesn't look that great to us. The only other one on the market out there right now is gasp, $750k, way beyond our budget for sure. 

Son suggested getting the well tested and since the house has been on the market for almost a year that we low ball the price. But its really not big enough. It is cute though.

It's a thought and we could sell the other one we bought. 

Son and DIL likes the 92 ft of waterfront where we could put a boat dock.  But only walking access to the lake on that side and would have to  put the boat in from the other side which everyone there does.

Oh and it close to everything  just a few miles away from the mall. If you look straight across the lake that is where our current place is. I do like it there.

Interesting anyway.


www.lakehomes.com/washington/black-lake/4525-black-lake-sw-olympia-wa-98512-lhrmls-01734167

And son put us at ease that he could pay off his house with his savings and than some but doesn't want to take the money out. He also said he is wanting to spend nothing right now as he thinks the government may shut down and he has large house payments to pay so is keeping money back. Don't blame him a bit.  Hubs thinks the repubs might keep it shut down for a long time. Who knows, will sure hurt a lot of folks if that happens.

Watching a scary sic fi show. Whoa, now really getting scarey, ooooooh!!!!

that place is cute! but yes, that other house is too close. also, what's up with the weird overhang on that 1st kitchen pic? I couldn't make pit anything like it in any other pics. just seemed odd to me.

[ners]

Morning all.  Poor sleep last night, bring on the coffee.

[azucena]

Sept 13, 2023 17:57:58 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

So my rant is about the cemetery. I told y’all Mister paid an extra $400 due to his request that his Dad be buried as close to his Mom as possible. The day we were at the cemetery and paid them, the lady helping us looked at the plots on her computer and said that the space directly in front of his Mom was available. Great! Even though I don’t know why that cost $400.

So today, after the ceremony at the cemetery was done, somebody went looking for Mister’s Mom’s grave. We saw the freshly dug hole for his Dad, so she should be close, right? Then Mister told me that the cemetery had called him and changed the location for his Dad, one spot over from the one directly in front of his Mom. By then, about 10 people were looking for his Mom’s grave. She doesn’t have a tombstone yet, we were told it could take up to a year for it to be made and placed.

So Mister and I drove around to the office, asking where was his Mom’s grave. I’m not even gon fuss about what an ordeal that was. So they printed off the plots and had us follow someone back out to the site, so they could show us where her grave was. Except the spot marked on the paper had some flowers and a temporary marker withs someone else’s name on it. TF?! By then, Mister’s Dad’s casket had been put in the ground and a crew was refilling the hole. So the young lady we followed and one of the men from that crew, determined that Mom’s grave had to be directly in front of where they were burying Mister’s Dad. I was appalled and before I could stop myself, I said “so basically nobody knows WHERE she is, right?” 

I was already looking crazy because I was taught that it’s disrespectful to walk on people’s graves. But they have the graves packed so closely together, that there are no paths and no way to avoid walking on people’s graves. That’s bad enough, but to not even know exactly where someone is buried, because what their computers show doesn’t match what’s actually out there? How the fuck is that okay?

I was really upset and outraged about that, but I didn’t want to further upset Mister or his brother, because Brother had hung around for us to come back from the office, so I dialed it back. The employees out there weren’t the correct people to raise hell with anyway. The young lady that went out there with us said she’d make sure the ladies in the office corrected it in the computer. I have zero confidence in that happening. 

Totally unacceptable. Wondering if someone who wasn't as upset during Mom's funeral could vouch for where she was laid to rest? Thinking Mentor might be a good person to ask without involving Mister.

[azucena]

Sept 13, 2023 18:27:28 GMT -5 Pink Cashmere said:

Please feel free to ignore me, because this is another rant.

Kiddo’s Mom insisted Mister come get Kiddo so he could ride with us to the funeral. We did not have limos this time. When we got there to pick Kiddo up, his Mom and whoever she was riding with, were all sitting in the car, waiting on us. To go to the same darn place! Kiddo got out of that car, and in the car with us. They literally pulled off right behind us. Going to the same darn place!

I can understand her wanting Kiddo to be acknowledged as part of the family, and sit with his Dad and sisters and the rest of the family. But Brother’s ex-wife didn’t insist he come get their daughter. She just made sure she got there on time, and their daughter walked in with the rest of the grandchildren. 

Idk why it was so important to Kiddo’s Mom to have Mister go out of his way to pick Kiddo up. When we left the church, Kiddo and Brother’s daughter rode with me and Mister, because they like being around each other. That was fine. I just didn’t understand the first part, Mister picking Kiddo up on the way to the funeral. Mister was agitated about it, I told him I was the one driving, we’d pick Kiddo up and still make it to the church in plenty of time, so just chill out. I kept my confusion to myself lol.

Why make things more complicated for Mister TODAY, the day of his Dad’s funeral, right behind his Mom’s funeral earlier this year?!

Then, at the cemetery, Kiddo’s Mom told Mister, “he’s going with you”. Mister said okay. What else is he gonna say, when Kiddo is his child.  But OD and YD ended up taking Kiddo and Brother’s daughter with them, because the little ones like hanging out with the older ones. Mister gave OD some money and they went to Texas Roadhouse to eat. 

Before Kiddo’s Mom left the cemetery she was fussing over Kiddo and saying “you need a breathing treatment” and I caught OD’s eye, and she looked away after rolling her eyes lol. After Kiddo’s Mom finally walked off, OD told me “Ain’t nothing wrong with this  boy except his Momma”. 

Because she's an AZZHAT who thinks life revolves around her.

[Opti]

I think the overhang on the island is for stools to be used underneath. I notice its other neighbor has like 8 vehicles so maybe it is a business? I personally would not want to cross a frequently used paved road to go to the dock. 

[minnesotapaintlady]

Sept 14, 2023 5:26:40 GMT -5 chiver78 said:

Sept 13, 2023 21:42:24 GMT -5 countrygirl2 said:

This is a place we kind of like, close to son, he is on the other side of the lake, not far away. He said he would like it later and DIL would too. But we feel too much money and we are concerned about the artesian well being safe and reliable. Also a privacy fence will go up along the driveway, as the place on the other side doesn't look that great to us. The only other one on the market out there right now is gasp, $750k, way beyond our budget for sure. 

Son suggested getting the well tested and since the house has been on the market for almost a year that we low ball the price. But its really not big enough. It is cute though.

It's a thought and we could sell the other one we bought. 

Son and DIL likes the 92 ft of waterfront where we could put a boat dock.  But only walking access to the lake on that side and would have to  put the boat in from the other side which everyone there does.

Oh and it close to everything  just a few miles away from the mall. If you look straight across the lake that is where our current place is. I do like it there.

Interesting anyway.


www.lakehomes.com/washington/black-lake/4525-black-lake-sw-olympia-wa-98512-lhrmls-01734167

And son put us at ease that he could pay off his house with his savings and than some but doesn't want to take the money out. He also said he is wanting to spend nothing right now as he thinks the government may shut down and he has large house payments to pay so is keeping money back. Don't blame him a bit.  Hubs thinks the repubs might keep it shut down for a long time. Who knows, will sure hurt a lot of folks if that happens.

Watching a scary sic fi show. Whoa, now really getting scarey, ooooooh!!!!

that place is cute! but yes, that other house is too close. also, what's up with the weird overhang on that 1st kitchen pic? I couldn't make pit anything like it in any other pics. just seemed odd to me.

Are you talking about in the ceiling?  The room next to it has a higher ceiling.  Although I don't know why they didn't carry the higher ceiling it all the way to the wall unless there is something structural under that lower area in the other (living?) room.

[CCL]

Sept 13, 2023 21:42:24 GMT -5 countrygirl2 said:

This is a place we kind of like, close to son, he is on the other side of the lake, not far away. He said he would like it later and DIL would too. But we feel too much money and we are concerned about the artesian well being safe and reliable. Also a privacy fence will go up along the driveway, as the place on the other side doesn't look that great to us. The only other one on the market out there right now is gasp, $750k, way beyond our budget for sure. 

Son suggested getting the well tested and since the house has been on the market for almost a year that we low ball the price. But its really not big enough. It is cute though.

It's a thought and we could sell the other one we bought. 

Son and DIL likes the 92 ft of waterfront where we could put a boat dock.  But only walking access to the lake on that side and would have to  put the boat in from the other side which everyone there does.

Oh and it close to everything  just a few miles away from the mall. If you look straight across the lake that is where our current place is. I do like it there.

Interesting anyway.


www.lakehomes.com/washington/black-lake/4525-black-lake-sw-olympia-wa-98512-lhrmls-01734167

And son put us at ease that he could pay off his house with his savings and than some but doesn't want to take the money out. He also said he is wanting to spend nothing right now as he thinks the government may shut down and he has large house payments to pay so is keeping money back. Don't blame him a bit.  Hubs thinks the repubs might keep it shut down for a long time. Who knows, will sure hurt a lot of folks if that happens.

Watching a scary sic fi show. Whoa, now really getting scarey, ooooooh!!!!

Agree. It's cute!

Personally, I couldn't share a driveway or a well with the neighbors. I'd pass on that guy with all the cars and the other neighbor is really close, too.

I like the place you've already got out there. This one doesn't seem to offer much more, for a lot more money.

[giramomma]

I just learned that I could have make a request through HR to have someone else do my performance evaluation.

I wish I would have known that a while ago. I would have opted for that.

[azucena]

Work project gonna miss a key client deadline in a couple of weeks so sounded the alarm and looped in all the teams involved. Was told to ask for a proj manager, so I did so. Just got my hand slapped that I don't have authority to ask for that.  Whatev, folks, whatev. I'm beyond caring if we miss deadline now. I've done my part.

[susana1954]

Sept 13, 2023 16:35:51 GMT -5 haapai said:

I'm celebrating.  The hedge that some fool (not me, for once) planted 18" from the sidewalk has been reduced to 6" stumps and all of the debris is in bags waiting to be picked up on Friday.  The remaining stumps will almost certainly sprout regrowth in the spring, but I'll be able to keep up with that with hand shears.  It's time for me to move on to the other wildly overgrown things and get as much of them to the curb before the city cuts off yard waste collection.  Three of the five shrubs planted 18" from the foundation of the house have also been stripped of greenery which would continue to photosynthesize and feed them.  The energy stored in their copious roots will certainly cause them to sprout lushly in the spring, if not before, but the growth will be much easier to get rid of.  The irises, ferns, and hostas that have been steadily shrinking in their shade may be able to recover.  These buggers got to seven feet tall and four feet in radius.  As much as I want to curse the fool that originally planted them, I suspect that they probably came with a label that understated how large they could get. 

Realistically, the yard looks like hell, but there's two to four less hours work that needs to be done screaming at me every time that I step outside or out of the car. 

I cut down a huge pine tree in the front yard for pretty much the same reason.  I couldn't keep up with the pine cones.

Of course, I regret it since I moved less than three months later!