Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 4, 2023 16:35:23 GMT -5
Oh, and Opti , the house is right on a walking trail that allows dogs, as long as they're on a leash. If I got this house, you'd probably want to visit. I might want to move in and become the dog walker and house caretaker. It looks great. I was doing good not thinking about wanting a dog until you mentioned that. I also miss walking trails. Look up the Great Swamp in New Jersey. I used to go to at least three different access points depending on where I was living.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2023 16:38:11 GMT -5
Well, I asked the question I wanted an answer to. I believe I also said that I know there are other details regarding this particular situation. The thing is, her estate or whatever the proper term is, needs to be handled, and Mister doesn’t know what he’s doing, so it’s best to get an attorney. She didn’t have a will, Dad was just the beneficiary on her life insurance policies. The money she had in bank accounts is tied up because she died. Dad was not on any of her accounts, Mister was on one, but for whatever reason the money in that account is not accessible either. After all the tens of thousands of dollars Mister has spent since last fall, he understandably does not want to spend thousands more on an attorney for something that is his Dad’s responsibility, especially if his Dad has the money to pay for it himself. Mister really doesn’t want to spend money on anything right now, unless he absolutely has to, because his available cash is less than what he’s comfortable with and he has a house that’s been somewhat of a money pit so far, plus 2 children he’s helping pay for college, and another minor child that might need whatever at any time. Mister’s own responsibilities are his priorities before anything outside of his household, including his Dad. At this point, we can not prove that his Dad is incompetent even though something is clearly not right. Being gossipy and a liar does not mean he’s incompetent. Making bad financial decisions does not mean he’s incompetent, he’s been doing that for decades. A couple of Doctors have said he might have dementia, but he “passed” all the tests for dementia at the neurologist. The MRI showed something going on with his brain, but the follow up appointment, Mister had to reschedule because Dad was still in another state with Baby Sister. Which was originally only supposed to have been for a couple of weeks. But whatever the MRI results mean, will it mean he’s deemed incompetent in a way that matters legally? Idk. I understand all of this would probably be easier if Mister had POA, but who’s going to pay for that? Mister doesn’t want to pay for that either. He is not willing to spend anymore money for anything regarding his Dad right now. I do not have much experience with this, but her dying without a will means the rules vary by state. In the state that my parents live in it means that there is not technically an estate to settle - the surviving spouse inherits everything and is responsible for closing accounts. In the state I live in it is much more complicated if someone dies without a will. I would have to petition the court to be named executor in order to move and close accounts, one of the main reasons that while DH maintain some separate accounts we are both still listed on those accounts. I would suggest that Mister's Dad pay and meet with an attorney to determine the requirements in that state. And yes, that should come from the life insurance money. In Texas, if a person dies intestate, there are actually 2 attorneys involved. One represents the State of Texas who works to discover any possible heirs, and one representing the deceased. The fees for both attorneys come from the estate. That's why my attorney friend reminds everyone that creating a simple will is a hell of lot cheaper than paying 2 lawyers if you die without one.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Jun 4, 2023 16:39:33 GMT -5
Oh, and Opti , the house is right on a walking trail that allows dogs, as long as they're on a leash. If I got this house, you'd probably want to visit. I might want to move in and become the dog walker and house caretaker. It looks great. I was doing good not thinking about wanting a dog until you mentioned that. I also miss walking trails. Look up the Great Swamp in New Jersey. I used to go to at least three different access points depending on where I was living. They've got endless walking trails in that community, which would just be paradise for me and my dogs. Unfortunately, they've also got acres of stores to shop at, and restaurants to eat at. I'd be safer for me to just stay on the walking trails.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 4, 2023 16:41:10 GMT -5
Tater tot pic for Welts. I think they were invented to use up potato trimmings from making fries. Because of that, they are often cheaper than French fries of a similar bag size. I want to buy a bag of potatoes but decided what was on offer online for the grocery store did not work for me. Decided yesterday I wasn't up to carrying a 5lb bag of potatoes over uneven ground for the quarter mile so just bought a couple loose red potatoes along with other produce at the grocery store I can walk to.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 4, 2023 16:44:17 GMT -5
Well, I asked the question I wanted an answer to. I believe I also said that I know there are other details regarding this particular situation. The thing is, her estate or whatever the proper term is, needs to be handled, and Mister doesn’t know what he’s doing, so it’s best to get an attorney. She didn’t have a will, Dad was just the beneficiary on her life insurance policies. The money she had in bank accounts is tied up because she died. Dad was not on any of her accounts, Mister was on one, but for whatever reason the money in that account is not accessible either. After all the tens of thousands of dollars Mister has spent since last fall, he understandably does not want to spend thousands more on an attorney for something that is his Dad’s responsibility, especially if his Dad has the money to pay for it himself. Mister really doesn’t want to spend money on anything right now, unless he absolutely has to, because his available cash is less than what he’s comfortable with and he has a house that’s been somewhat of a money pit so far, plus 2 children he’s helping pay for college, and another minor child that might need whatever at any time. Mister’s own responsibilities are his priorities before anything outside of his household, including his Dad. At this point, we can not prove that his Dad is incompetent even though something is clearly not right. Being gossipy and a liar does not mean he’s incompetent. Making bad financial decisions does not mean he’s incompetent, he’s been doing that for decades. A couple of Doctors have said he might have dementia, but he “passed” all the tests for dementia at the neurologist. The MRI showed something going on with his brain, but the follow up appointment, Mister had to reschedule because Dad was still in another state with Baby Sister. Which was originally only supposed to have been for a couple of weeks. But whatever the MRI results mean, will it mean he’s deemed incompetent in a way that matters legally? Idk. I understand all of this would probably be easier if Mister had POA, but who’s going to pay for that? Mister doesn’t want to pay for that either. He is not willing to spend anymore money for anything regarding his Dad right now. I do not have much experience with this, but her dying without a will means the rules vary by state. In the state that my parents live in it means that there is not technically an estate to settle - the surviving spouse inherits everything and is responsible for closing accounts. In the state I live in it is much more complicated if someone dies without a will. I would have to petition the court to be named executor in order to move and close accounts, one of the main reasons that while DH maintain some separate accounts we are both still listed on those accounts. I would suggest that Mister's Dad pay and meet with an attorney to determine the requirements in that state. And yes, that should come from the life insurance money. Thank you for the info. Mister did talk to an attorney already, just to ask questions once he learned about the probate requirement. He/she confirmed what I’d read, that in our state, without a will, it has to go through probate. But if the deceased had less than $50k and no real estate, it doesn’t have to go through the whole process, whatever that means. And idk if their house, joint on the mortgage and the deed, is considered real estate for that purpose.
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jerseygirl
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Post by jerseygirl on Jun 4, 2023 16:45:44 GMT -5
Nice clean house but FABULOUS location! I don’t know why I torture myself looking at these low prices and ridiculous low taxes
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 4, 2023 16:46:41 GMT -5
I might want to move in and become the dog walker and house caretaker. It looks great. I was doing good not thinking about wanting a dog until you mentioned that. I also miss walking trails. Look up the Great Swamp in New Jersey. I used to go to at least three different access points depending on where I was living. They've got endless walking trails in that community, which would just be paradise for me and my dogs. Unfortunately, they've also got acres of stores to shop at, and restaurants to eat at. I'd be safer for me to just stay on the walking trails. There is some very good eating by me. Vietnamese, Thai and Chinese and top rated BBQ by Guy Fieri. Now if you just drive a few miles toward another town there are two other places that made Fieri's show plus exceptional Italian, Korean, and a Filipino restaurant. Then there is the chocolate place locally which has some chocolates I really want to buy a couple pieces of - dark chocolate containing liquor infused ganache such as bourbon or cabernet. Even dairy free. (Not all of it is of course) You can always limit for venturing in for shopping and restaurants. I do not recommend however letting AAA disable your car.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Jun 4, 2023 16:47:50 GMT -5
Read the VERY FUNNY electric fence story from countrygirl One year Jerseyguy got tired of the deer eating out azaleas so put in an electric fence around them. EVERY SINGLE MALE HAD TO TEST IT!! Of course not as powerful as in the story Anyway read the story to my engineer Jerseyguy. Well he listened then explained very carefully the errors in the story YEESH !! LOLOLOL! That had me laughing even harder then the original story. But I must admit not unexpected after working with engineers for a couple of decades. It got so bad at one time that any contract change needed some creative "technical changes" from my side to get them to concentrate on the needed contract language changes. I never touched the technical descriptions yet they always proceeded to tell me the finer points of each change. In the end I decided that we should just pretend the change would be something like the satellite would be painted pink instead of baby blue - now let's focus on design changes/cost/time/late penalties (or not)/etc. and you can make the technical changes as needed. I swear there was the occasional smoke coming out of their ears when their brains tried to process what I said but ultimately it worked.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 4, 2023 16:49:28 GMT -5
Nice clean house but FABULOUS location! I don’t know why I torture myself looking at these low prices and ridiculous low taxes They have way more snow & cold than we do, but MN is pretty civilized. My mom's sister lived there when she was alive and one of my former college engineering buddies might be up there still.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Jun 4, 2023 16:52:31 GMT -5
Have Mister make an appointment at the probate office in your county. They will know the rules in your state. A lawyer may be the best thing but they'll be able to get you started on the process. They've been very helpful to me as I deal with my grandma's estate.
My grandpa died without a will and it wasn't too much more of a hassle than if he'd had a will. Everything went to my grandma.
I'm curious why he can't access the money in the account his name is on. My dad and I are on grandma's. We've continued to pay the bills for her house and paid the final medical bills. Deposits come in and the auto payment for the insurance continues.
My uncle hired a lawyer to settle my aunt's estate. I'm not sure if she had a will or not. It's also been incredibly slow. My aunt died in March 2022. In March 2023, my uncle mentioned he didn't know where the lawyer was with the process. I understand not calling them all the time and running up the bill but to have no clue if it's final or not? I dropped a hint to my cousin on that but I'm not sure what happened.
ETA: in my grandma's state, real estate doesn't go through probate. I had to put an appraised value on the estate inventory form but that was for purposes of potential capital gains taxes. They looked up the deed while we were in the probate office. It wasn't written as a transfer on death but it had rights of survivorship so they said they'd cut a new deed to my dad and uncle. My dad got a letter Saturday saying a new deed had been issued but it would take 18-24 months to be recorded at the courthouse. I'm not sure why that takes so dang long. I assume my uncle got an identical letter but he's still in the hospital.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2023 16:52:39 GMT -5
I do not have much experience with this, but her dying without a will means the rules vary by state. In the state that my parents live in it means that there is not technically an estate to settle - the surviving spouse inherits everything and is responsible for closing accounts. In the state I live in it is much more complicated if someone dies without a will. I would have to petition the court to be named executor in order to move and close accounts, one of the main reasons that while DH maintain some separate accounts we are both still listed on those accounts. I would suggest that Mister's Dad pay and meet with an attorney to determine the requirements in that state. And yes, that should come from the life insurance money. Thank you for the info. Mister did talk to an attorney already, just to ask questions once he learned about the probate requirement. He/she confirmed what I’d read, that in our state, without a will, it has to go through probate. But if the deceased had less than $50k and no real estate, it doesn’t have to go through the whole process, whatever that means. And idk if their house, joint on the mortgage and the deed, is considered real estate for that purpose.I'll be interested to hear about this part - I suspect the house is real estate for the purposes of probate but Did anyone file his/her 2022 federal tax return yet? If not, something to talk to the attorney about for sure
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2023 16:57:55 GMT -5
Have Mister make an appointment at the probate office in your county. They will know the rules in your state. A lawyer may be the best thing but they'll be able to get you started on the process. They've been very helpful to me as I deal with my grandma's estate. My grandpa died without a will and it wasn't too much more of a hassle than if he'd had a will. Everything went to my grandma. I'm curious why he can't access the money in the account his name is on. My dad and I are on grandma's. We've continued to pay the bills for her house and paid the final medical bills. Deposits come in and the auto payment for the insurance continues. My uncle hired a lawyer to settle my aunt's estate. I'm not sure if she had a will or not. It's also been incredibly slow. My aunt died in March 2022. In March 2023, my uncle mentioned he didn't know where the lawyer was with the process. I understand not calling them all the time and running up the bill but to have no clue if it's final or not? I dropped a hint to my cousin on that but I'm not sure what happened. In Texas, if two people are on an account and one dies, the funds are frozen pending probate unless the account was set up as joint with right of survivorship. DH and I could have a joint account, but without right of survivorship status, we would both be SOL if the other died.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Jun 4, 2023 17:00:43 GMT -5
I do not have much experience with this, but her dying without a will means the rules vary by state. In the state that my parents live in it means that there is not technically an estate to settle - the surviving spouse inherits everything and is responsible for closing accounts. In the state I live in it is much more complicated if someone dies without a will. I would have to petition the court to be named executor in order to move and close accounts, one of the main reasons that while DH maintain some separate accounts we are both still listed on those accounts. I would suggest that Mister's Dad pay and meet with an attorney to determine the requirements in that state. And yes, that should come from the life insurance money. Thank you for the info. Mister did talk to an attorney already, just to ask questions once he learned about the probate requirement. He/she confirmed what I’d read, that in our state, without a will, it has to go through probate. But if the deceased had less than $50k and no real estate, it doesn’t have to go through the whole process, whatever that means. And idk if their house, joint on the mortgage and the deed, is considered real estate for that purpose. The house would not be included.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 4, 2023 17:06:39 GMT -5
wvugurl26 I had no idea there was a such thing as a probate office, and I’m sure Mister doesn’t either lol. Thank you! I guess our state law concerning the bank account Mister is on, is similar to the law in Texas that soupandstew referred to.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 4, 2023 17:08:13 GMT -5
Thank you for the info. Mister did talk to an attorney already, just to ask questions once he learned about the probate requirement. He/she confirmed what I’d read, that in our state, without a will, it has to go through probate. But if the deceased had less than $50k and no real estate, it doesn’t have to go through the whole process, whatever that means. And idk if their house, joint on the mortgage and the deed, is considered real estate for that purpose.I'll be interested to hear about this part - I suspect the house is real estate for the purposes of probate but Did anyone file his/her 2022 federal tax return yet? If not, something to talk to the attorney about for sure I have no idea about the tax return. I will make a note to mention that to Mister. Thanks!
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2023 17:10:41 GMT -5
I'll be interested to hear about this part - I suspect the house is real estate for the purposes of probate but Did anyone file his/her 2022 federal tax return yet? If not, something to talk to the attorney about for sure I have no idea about the tax return. I will make a note to mention that to Mister. Thanks! They might have been under the minimum income level needing to file, but you've said Dad had too much income from SS and pension to qualify for Medicaid so I'm not sure. ETA to add: And they might have been filing separately rather than jointly given their complex financial and personal relationship.
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Jun 4, 2023 17:16:49 GMT -5
It's not a beautiful house, sorry to say. Plus, all that crappy carpeting instead of hardwood. The view is nice, but it seems like a lot of money for a mediocre house.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 4, 2023 17:19:10 GMT -5
The feeders are ready for the cats but the cats are not ready for the collars! It make take a few days to for them to figure out that is how they get fed. They can both stand to lose some weight so if they don't eat much for a few days, it won't hurt them. Maddow hasn't eaten much since he went to the vet. The sensors are bigger than I thought and I think that is why they don't like the collar. It weighs more than the bell did. The bells are now gone.
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Jun 4, 2023 17:20:12 GMT -5
Tater tot pic for Welts. I think they were invented to use up potato trimmings from making fries. Because of that, they are often cheaper than French fries of a similar bag size. I want to buy a bag of potatoes but decided what was on offer online for the grocery store did not work for me. Decided yesterday I wasn't up to carrying a 5lb bag of potatoes over uneven ground for the quarter mile so just bought a couple loose red potatoes along with other produce at the grocery store I can walk to. I've never seen those in the stores, and sometimes I make a point of looking. I guess the French don't eat Tater Tots.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 4, 2023 17:20:50 GMT -5
It's not a beautiful house, sorry to say. Plus, all that crappy carpeting instead of hardwood. The view is nice, but it seems like a lot of money for a mediocre house. I agree on the carpeting, except I would keep it in the main bedroom. I would add crown molding throughout and change out the brass fireplace surround. And paint the kitchen cabinets b/c that's just too much wood going on in one room for me
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 4, 2023 17:22:31 GMT -5
When dad died, my sister and I were joint owners of the account so we could still pay bills that came in. Any refunds, etc. had to go in the estate account.
Life insurance proceeds came directly to us once they had the death certificate in.
IRA came to us fairly quickly.
The only assets dad had were what was in his apartment and what was in the bank.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 4, 2023 17:34:56 GMT -5
I think Andi's been sending subliminal messages to the missy. Missy got up, and first thing she asked for is the makeup we bought her yesterday. She got some nude elf eyeshadow.
We managed to get her to wait until her breakfast was halfway done. This made me laugh. Someone gave my 5yr old DGD some "real" make up for her birthday. Her almost 3yr old sister and she were playing with it on Friday. She was so protective of that stuff! Only she was allowed to apply it (heavily). I need to get her sister some for her birthday, next week, to avoid the fighting and crying.
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 4, 2023 17:37:28 GMT -5
It's not a beautiful house, sorry to say. Plus, all that crappy carpeting instead of hardwood. The view is nice, but it seems like a lot of money for a mediocre house. I agree on the carpeting, except I would keep it in the main bedroom. I would add crown molding throughout and change out the brass fireplace surround. And paint the kitchen cabinets b/c that's just too much wood going on in one room for me I prefer carpet. It's so much warmer in the winter and my feet and knees are happier with squishy carpet. I'm not fond of the color of that carpet though.
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jerseygirl
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Post by jerseygirl on Jun 4, 2023 17:38:50 GMT -5
Little 7 yr old DGD had a spa day birthday party! There is a van that comes to the party. White terry robes, manicures and facials!! What happened to pin the tail on the donkey and musical chairs??
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 4, 2023 17:39:10 GMT -5
My grandma said this morning that she wanted to try slides so I'm going to get her some today. Should I get her Nike slides like I wear, or those yeezy knock offs? Nike's. Her feet need good shoes at this point in her life, IMO. It's nice of you to get them for her. ❤
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 4, 2023 17:44:54 GMT -5
I would like the record to show that I went to TJ Maxx today and I didn't buy any makeup.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 4, 2023 17:45:56 GMT -5
I don't think she really cares. She was saying that her toe hurt. I guess someone comes and cuts her toenails and they aren't coming until Wednesday. I can't handle feet or I'd just cut them for her. My uncle suggested she wear shoes like the slides I had on. She said she'd try it. I just bought her a $15 pair of Champion slides off the clearance rack. That way if she doesn't like them, I didn't spend a bunch of money. Hell, I'll reposses them and wear them myself if she doesn't like them. How will slides help with her toe nails hurting? Are they hitting the edge of her shoes? Yes. The nails were crammed in her shoes. They are really nice slides with memory foam, so they are super comfortable. She said she liked them.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 4, 2023 17:45:59 GMT -5
oh boy. definitely come back to tell us the stories! I just goofed in the kitchen. I poured what I thought was water, from a frying pan I used last night, into the sink. it was actually vegetable oil, I hadn't poured it into the bottle under the sink yet. I've chased it with a long stream of hot water, and am about to mix up some baking soda and vinegar to follow that. anything else I should do? it wasn't a ton, but it was more than a few swirls around the pan. I had actually fried some chicken. Oh-oh. I hope it goes well.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jun 4, 2023 17:47:16 GMT -5
I would like the record to show that I went to TJ Maxx today and I didn't buy any makeup. Buttttttt did you come home with any clothes? Inquiring minds want to know
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Jun 4, 2023 17:51:09 GMT -5
Apparently at some point I may need an estate account.
The guy who is selling the glass claims the check must be made out that way because the estate is the owner. To me the will says everything except $x in cash goes jointly to my dad and uncle so to my thinking they are the owners of the house contents not the estate.
It's not a hill I'm willing to die on though. And it may be months yet before he gets it sold so I'm not worrying about it. If I have to I plan to deposit and move the money out immediately.
I filled in direct deposit details for her state tax return so we'll see. I had to refile one particular form because Turbo Tax made a replacement form and the original was required.
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