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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2023 19:18:32 GMT -5
wut?? I'm sorry, I don't have experience with this, but can whoever has POA freeze his credit so he can't pull shit like this? I don't even know if places like that pull credit, either. Idk. Mister is trying to figure it out now. I think with some of those type places, as long as you have stable and regular income, and give them permission to debit your bank account for payments, they don’t care about your credit. If that’s the case, I’m not sure that freezing his credit will matter. Those places are financial vultures, preying over the neediest and most vulnerable. Dad's use of them is a solid indicator of his incapacity to manage his own finances
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 1, 2023 19:30:35 GMT -5
For someone who bitches he doesn't want to be involved DH sure allows himself to get involved.
Whatever is between my dad and J is between them. Whatever decision is made in regards to the business is his decision.
But yet DH keeps coming to me with ideas to "fix" things and is pissed at me that I won't "think outside the box".
No I won't because it's called a boundary. I'm not getting involved outside working a few weekends if need be to cover.
But DH hates that possibility so much he's suggesting we take loans to give out. Umm no.
Let her make her own bed. Let him figure out where the business goes from here.
Cause it'll be like helping Bob if we help her and a decision needs to be made eventually anyhow the lease is up next June.
Absolutely none of it affects me. 4 years in spite of a global pandemic is pretty damn good and something to be proud of. He'll be fine financially. Our relationship doesn't suffer at all
She is absolutely 100% not my problem and I refuse to set things up to where now we're potentially enmeshed with her. Honestly at this point I'd prefer she stay gone.
And she could. We could do DHs plan and she still quits. Or now uses this behavior as leverage for other stuff.
There is zero reward or return it'sall risk all just because DH is feeding off it. So fine I'll be the obstinate stubborn bitch.
My moniker may be DQ but I think it's DH who is the DQ in real life.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2023 19:34:45 GMT -5
For someone who bitches he doesn't want to be involved DH sure allows himself to get involved. Whatever is between my dad and J is between them. Whatever decision is made in regards to the business is his decision. But yet DH keeps coming to me with ideas to "fix" things and is pissed at me that I won't "think outside the box". No I won't because it's called a boundary. I'm not getting involved outside working a few weekends if need be to cover. But DH hates that possibility so much he's suggesting we take loans to give out. Umm no.
Let her make her own bed. Let him figure out where the business goes from here. Cause it'll be like helping Bob if we help her and a decision needs to be made eventually anyhow the lease is up next June. Absolutely none of it affects me. 4 years in spite of a global pandemic is pretty damn good and something to be proud of. He'll be fine financially. She is absolutely 100% not my problem and I refuse to set things up to where now we're potentially enmeshed with her. My moniker may be DQ but I think it's DH who is the DQ in real life. uh,uh No how, no way Nada Nope Healthy boundaries make healthy relationships.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 1, 2023 19:39:27 GMT -5
Idk. Mister is trying to figure it out now. I think with some of those type places, as long as you have stable and regular income, and give them permission to debit your bank account for payments, they don’t care about your credit. If that’s the case, I’m not sure that freezing his credit will matter. Those places are financial vultures, preying over the neediest and most vulnerable. Dad's use of them is a solid indicator of his incapacity to manage his own finances The thing is, when he was with Baby Sister these last few months, she and her DH didn’t let him spend his money, they paid for everything for him. So, he should have some spending money, why would he need a loan? His bills are paid out of the account Mister manages. His spending money is a separate account. Did he spend 3 months worth of spending money in a week? Idk.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2023 19:50:41 GMT -5
Those places are financial vultures, preying over the neediest and most vulnerable. Dad's use of them is a solid indicator of his incapacity to manage his own finances The thing is, when he was with Baby Sister these last few months, she and her DH didn’t let him spend his money, they paid for everything for him. So, he should have some spending money, why would he need a loan? His bills are paid out of the account Mister manages. His spending money is a separate account. Did he spend 3 months worth of spending money in a week? Idk. That's a very good question and an even better one is what he's spending it on. Hookers and blow doesn't sound like his thing, and you can only spend so much nickel and diming it on pizza delivery either. So what and where? With no disrespect, online gambling? The online betting thing can suck $$ like crazy.
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saveinla
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Post by saveinla on Jun 1, 2023 19:52:07 GMT -5
The only way to get away from that type if loan is to close the account. Its very easy for them to keep taking 20$ per month.
My friend who became an alcoholic did this and his family lost everything.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 1, 2023 20:19:25 GMT -5
When we bought this house back in '95, DH and I were both still working and sharing the yard stuff. He immediately burned off to go hunting for a week so I was out raking up 9 millions leaves and met all the neighbors. Come spring, I headed out to mow as did my female neighbors. DH said we looked like Stepford Wives 20 years down the road he said we looked The Witches of Eastwick. He was right the second time around. LOL
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 1, 2023 20:23:01 GMT -5
For someone who bitches he doesn't want to be involved DH sure allows himself to get involved. Whatever is between my dad and J is between them. Whatever decision is made in regards to the business is his decision. But yet DH keeps coming to me with ideas to "fix" things and is pissed at me that I won't "think outside the box". No I won't because it's called a boundary. I'm not getting involved outside working a few weekends if need be to cover. But DH hates that possibility so much he's suggesting we take loans to give out. Umm no. Let her make her own bed. Let him figure out where the business goes from here. Cause it'll be like helping Bob if we help her and a decision needs to be made eventually anyhow the lease is up next June. Absolutely none of it affects me. 4 years in spite of a global pandemic is pretty damn good and something to be proud of. He'll be fine financially. Our relationship doesn't suffer at all She is absolutely 100% not my problem and I refuse to set things up to where now we're potentially enmeshed with her. Honestly at this point I'd prefer she stay gone. And she could. We could do DHs plan and she still quits. Or now uses this behavior as leverage for other stuff. There is zero reward or return it'sall risk all just because DH is feeding off it. So fine I'll be the obstinate stubborn bitch. My moniker may be DQ but I think it's DH who is the DQ in real life. I'd do the same thing you are. Change your name to SMART GIRL!
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 1, 2023 20:36:38 GMT -5
Those places are financial vultures, preying over the neediest and most vulnerable. Dad's use of them is a solid indicator of his incapacity to manage his own finances The thing is, when he was with Baby Sister these last few months, she and her DH didn’t let him spend his money, they paid for everything for him. So, he should have some spending money, why would he need a loan? His bills are paid out of the account Mister manages. His spending money is a separate account. Did he spend 3 months worth of spending money in a week? Idk. Scam? Get rich quick or maybe someone catfishing him?
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Jun 1, 2023 21:15:11 GMT -5
The thing is, when he was with Baby Sister these last few months, she and her DH didn’t let him spend his money, they paid for everything for him. So, he should have some spending money, why would he need a loan? His bills are paid out of the account Mister manages. His spending money is a separate account. Did he spend 3 months worth of spending money in a week? Idk. Scam? Get rich quick or maybe someone catfishing him? Or, what about the ladyfriend? Maybe he's helping her out?
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Post by Deleted on Jun 1, 2023 21:23:27 GMT -5
The thing is, when he was with Baby Sister these last few months, she and her DH didn’t let him spend his money, they paid for everything for him. So, he should have some spending money, why would he need a loan? His bills are paid out of the account Mister manages. His spending money is a separate account. Did he spend 3 months worth of spending money in a week? Idk. Scam? Get rich quick or maybe someone catfishing him? As I remember, Dad was very vocal about his desire to remarry quickly. That may have drawn the attention of some more interested in his $$
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Jun 1, 2023 21:45:49 GMT -5
I went to the pool and they tossed us out after 20 minutes. Power failure. We've had sporadic power failures all through this heat wave. Lots of sirens, cop cars screaming by, accidents because the traffic lights are out, etc. I think it may be because of all the air conditioners. They suck up a lot of power. Sorry about the power failures. Heat waves always test grids. Did you at least enjoy the twenty minutes? I did, thanks.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 1, 2023 21:48:13 GMT -5
I was finally able to log in to Old Navy just now, while I was listening to a call that really didn't need my presence. I hate so much how awful their clothes are the past couple years (to echo the complaints I've seen the past few days from others) in that the much-loved basic white twill shorts I wanted to order another pair of, simply aren't a thing anymore. same as my beloved swing dresses that I can dress up or down. I ordered a pair of white denim shorts, another pair of blue denim, and then a pair of twill cargo shorts that I'm probably going to hate and return. I just happen to have ordered 4 pair of shorts from them. Two I was on the borderline with. They were $10 so I figured I'd take a chance. I can always return them.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 1, 2023 21:49:04 GMT -5
The thing is, when he was with Baby Sister these last few months, she and her DH didn’t let him spend his money, they paid for everything for him. So, he should have some spending money, why would he need a loan? His bills are paid out of the account Mister manages. His spending money is a separate account. Did he spend 3 months worth of spending money in a week? Idk. Scam? Get rich quick or maybe someone catfishing him? Scammers are out in full force right now. Given his lack of focus, he's an easy target for those willing to sweet talk him and agree with him how ungrateful his kids are.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 1, 2023 21:51:22 GMT -5
I've always felt that many of us here are exceptional. And now there's proof "Polite society considers swearing to be a vulgar sign of low intelligence and education, for why would one rely on rude language when blessed with a rich vocabulary? That perception, as it turns out, is full of, uh … baloney. In fact, swearing may be a sign of verbal superiority, studies have shown, and may provide other possible rewards as well." www.cnn.com/2021/01/26/health/swearing-benefits-wellness/index.htmlIf that's true, I'm the queen of superiority for the planet. My vocabulary would make a sailor blush.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 1, 2023 21:56:33 GMT -5
Idk. Mister is trying to figure it out now. I think with some of those type places, as long as you have stable and regular income, and give them permission to debit your bank account for payments, they don’t care about your credit. If that’s the case, I’m not sure that freezing his credit will matter. Those places are financial vultures, preying over the neediest and most vulnerable. Dad's use of them is a solid indicator of his incapacity to manage his own finances You want to start the process ASAP to prove he's not financially capable if Mister and by extension you are going to be enmeshed in his financial failures. It takes very little time for a determined scammer to drain any target of all their money. If he is using these type of firms, start a paper trail, get an elder care attorney that Mister can afford and start carving out a plan. Unfortunately since Mister's mom hid how bad Mister's dad was, you are already behind where I think you want to be.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jun 2, 2023 0:57:19 GMT -5
I know MIL had dementia. But she told caregivers how much she disliked me and how she told her son not to marry me. I asked hubs, he said he had never said that. So don't believe people with dementia can't do stuff like that. I guess I got bad mouthed by her.
I'm up to late for no reason. Hubs called me tonight and told me how tired he is. He needs to rest a bit. I wish he would.
But he was also telling me about a lady that had a cat down the street. He said it was a really pretty cat, he said it was brown, had white paws. He figures it is some expensive type of kitty. I can't even imagine him admiring a cat, that was so odd. But I like it.
He is having trouble with his paint sprayer, he said he may have to buy a different brand of paint. Can't figure out what is wrong with it. Poor guy, he works to hard.
Son is getting eye surgery the 13th, I hope hubs is able to help him if he needs it. It's for cataracts but think it is supposed to help the eye with iritus too.
Later all
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Works4me
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Someone responded to your personal ad - a German Shepherd named Tara wants to have you for dinner...
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Post by Works4me on Jun 2, 2023 1:52:55 GMT -5
Opti - is that Moon Shadow on your arm in your new picture here? Yes. I will try to get a better one. That's also my old and only blue striped apron in the pic as well. All I noticed was how cute Moon Shadow is. The way he is looking up at you with so much love and adoration is just precious. I don't know when I have seen that much focused love from a small pet like that. He's definitely a Mama's Boy in all the bestvways! Please give him.some extra loves from me and tell him to take good care of you.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Jun 2, 2023 2:40:34 GMT -5
I'll be off in 5 minutes to check out Liverpool. DH is not feeling well so he's going to stay here and rest maybe by the pool in a deck chair.
Wales was lovely, bucolic. And the castle, the same one where Charles was vested as Prince of Wales, was impressive, built on a Roman castle from centuries before the 13th century when the current iteration was built.
The weather continues to be perfect. Wildly lucky, I am.
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Jun 2, 2023 5:08:36 GMT -5
I was finally able to log in to Old Navy just now, while I was listening to a call that really didn't need my presence. I hate so much how awful their clothes are the past couple years (to echo the complaints I've seen the past few days from others) in that the much-loved basic white twill shorts I wanted to order another pair of, simply aren't a thing anymore. same as my beloved swing dresses that I can dress up or down. I ordered a pair of white denim shorts, another pair of blue denim, and then a pair of twill cargo shorts that I'm probably going to hate and return. I just happen to have ordered 4 pair of shorts from them. Two I was on the borderline with. They were $10 so I figured I'd take a chance. I can always return them. I saw a couple for $10, but they were out of my size. lucky you for jumping on those deals!
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Jun 2, 2023 5:23:46 GMT -5
Been up since around 2am. Every time I got close to getting back to sleep stomach wanted to puke, probably sinus related, but all I am managing to get out is some bile. 🤢
Going to try to lay down again for a bit, before I pull the trigger on a sick day.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jun 2, 2023 6:11:43 GMT -5
I've always felt that many of us here are exceptional. And now there's proof "Polite society considers swearing to be a vulgar sign of low intelligence and education, for why would one rely on rude language when blessed with a rich vocabulary? That perception, as it turns out, is full of, uh … baloney. In fact, swearing may be a sign of verbal superiority, studies have shown, and may provide other possible rewards as well." www.cnn.com/2021/01/26/health/swearing-benefits-wellness/index.htmlIf that's true, I'm the queen of superiority for the planet. My vocabulary would make a sailor blush. I’m called the potty mouth of the south for a reason. I probably cursed the doc who delivered me! But I know when to be drippy sweet too so there’s that too. Maybe we should start a cursing thread or would that be against COC?
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 2, 2023 6:17:06 GMT -5
Been up since around 2am. Every time I got close to getting back to sleep stomach wanted to puke, probably sinus related, but all I am managing to get out is some bile. 🤢 Going to try to lay down again for a bit, before I pull the trigger on a sick day. Hang in there. It sounds like I am only doing slightly better than you are. If I had hydrated enough, I don't think I would have been close to vomiting, but yeah I felt some of that stomach acid creeping up multiple times last night. All this Spring allergy & sinus stuff stresses me out. Wondering if I would get that blood draw yesterday did not help either. Nor did hanging out in the bus stop in high heat. July and August must be misearable. Hope you feel better soon.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 2, 2023 6:18:52 GMT -5
Looks like it will be 91 or so when I wait for the bus this time. Glad we should be past the 90s around dinner time. Tomorrows low 70s wil be very welcome.
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Jun 2, 2023 6:57:59 GMT -5
Been up since around 2am. Every time I got close to getting back to sleep stomach wanted to puke, probably sinus related, but all I am managing to get out is some bile. 🤢 Going to try to lay down again for a bit, before I pull the trigger on a sick day. I've had a rough week or so as well, for the same reason. I hope you can get some rest.
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 2, 2023 7:20:38 GMT -5
Three of my cruise companions just tested positive for covid and a 4th is a spouse of one of them that is now exposed as well. The three went to my cousins graduation where everyone that went got it. We don't disembark until 2 weeks from today, so hopefully that's plenty of time for them to get better. Today is musical cars day for me with a lot of running back and forth from home to town. I stupidly scheduled the Fridge getting it's new mirror installed the same day Carrot has a bunch of stuff going on so that's complicated life more than I'd like.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 2, 2023 7:25:11 GMT -5
Three of my cruise companions just tested positive for covid and a 4th is a spouse of one of them that is now exposed as well. The three went to my cousins graduation where everyone that went got it. We don't disembark until 2 weeks from today, so hopefully that's plenty of time for them to get better. Today is musical cars day for me with a lot of running back and forth from home to town. I stupidly scheduled the Fridge getting it's new mirror installed the same day Carrot has a bunch of stuff going on so that's complicated life more than I'd like.
Geeze. I hope everything goes smoothly with the back and forth and covid recovery is quick!
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Jun 2, 2023 7:42:48 GMT -5
I think I am too tired to sleep. Currently choking down some saltiness and Gatorade.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 2, 2023 7:43:17 GMT -5
Scam? Get rich quick or maybe someone catfishing him? As I remember, Dad was very vocal about his desire to remarry quickly. That may have drawn the attention of some more interested in his $$ There are scammers that troll funeral home web sites and obits looking for widows and widowers. My dad started getting a flood of them before the ink even dried on my mom's death certificate. Our personal favorite was the one we called "The Princess of Africa" She went on a safari and got kidnapped, we had to post her ransom so she could get back to the states. When that didn't work she needed us to give her money to buy her weapons to protect herself so she could escape. Of course once she escaped she would be available for lots of sexy time. Dad's SO got flooded with them as well shortly after her husband died. Fortunately FIL is not really active on social media. It's freaking sick. It's an entire industry. Does dad have social media? A cell phone? I would demand to see them to see who he may have been talking to.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Jun 2, 2023 7:43:48 GMT -5
I'm feeling all the sinus crap today. That was always the tell of a sinus infection when I was a kid, all the drainage would make me puke. Then it was off to the doctor for me because mine never cleared.
As an adult I can see it was bs but I would try so hard not to throw up or hide it because I wanted the perfect attendance award. We aren't robots and we should rest when we are sick. But I guess the Type A perfectionist ran deep even then.
I'm waiting on an Old Navy order to ship. I got 2 dresses, 2 pairs of shorts and a shirt. Vacation shopping. I had credit card points so it was $0.50.
I'm actually home this weekend and deep cleaning and purging.
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