Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 3, 2011 17:30:42 GMT -5
Be careful of food - we've just picked ours & it's definitely the most expensive part of our wedding. It'll probably be around $5k, on top of the venue which is $2900. That doesn't include booze - we want to have open bar for beer & wine only, for cocktail hour. Need to see what that'd run... Our photographer is $1700, our DJ we've just confirmed with and I don't know what the charge will be (he's really cheap though, I have several friends who have used him), invitations we're using Vistaprint which is simple and cheap. Haven't really thought about salon stuff yet but that's next, and we need to settle on favors... ::sigh:: so much to do!! We're 11 weeks out from our wedding How many guests do you have, Cael? Your number sounds about right. I'm just looking at the catering/rental quote again and it's just a hair under $6,000. $2k for the food, $1k for the staff, $1.5k for rentals and gratuity, and $500 for the bar and bartender. Oh man, it doesn't include alcohol! I forgot about that. *dies quietly* You mentioned feeling like a big spender? Egad.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 3, 2011 17:35:50 GMT -5
I don't know what kind of flowers we'll be having. Like you, I want to do them cheap and seasonal.
$1.5k for alcohol, decorations, flowers, tuxes, and whatever else I'm forgetting. I may need to be resuscitated.
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cael
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Post by cael on May 3, 2011 17:42:02 GMT -5
We're having 75-80ish. It's scary how fast everything adds up, despite wanting to stay cheap... I'm just thankful for my parents helping (food and venue) and the fact that we've paid for everything else cash so far. Gulp - did I mention our $500 cake? cake was important to us, and there's a nationally-known cake place that family of mine owns that we really wanted to go with. The cake is going to be amazing and gorgeous. My mother offered to help with that one too but I feel bad letting her help with other stuff..
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 3, 2011 17:48:43 GMT -5
We're having 75-80ish. It's scary how fast everything adds up, despite wanting to stay cheap... I'm just thankful for my parents helping (food and venue) and the fact that we've paid for everything else cash so far.Sooooooo muuuuuuuuuch thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 3, 2011 17:54:46 GMT -5
I was wrong about them costing pretty much the same. If I do the reception at my second choice, the tab will come in under $10,000.
I don't know what to do. $5k is a huge difference at this point in our lives. And yes, it's just one day. On the other hand, we'll probably never do anything this big again. Shouldn't we go with what we really want?
I'm really torn here.
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cael
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Post by cael on May 3, 2011 18:07:02 GMT -5
I don't know what to tell you, you need to do what you guys want & what works for you it'll work out! If you can do it comfortably and you really want it, go for the first choice!
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 3, 2011 18:10:59 GMT -5
That's what I'm thinking too.
How do people MAKE these decisions?!
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on May 3, 2011 20:29:41 GMT -5
Well, I am not going to tell you how "I" make those decisions, but I can tell you what I think YOU should do I think you should go for it. By reading your posts over the last few years, you have ALWAYS came off as sensible, responsible, logical and someone with a great head on her shoulders. I was VERY surprised to find out that you are only 25. So, for that reason I don't think that you would be considering more expensive option if there was any question in your mind whether you can afford it. Is it a splurge? Sure. So what? Get away from YM for 5 minutes and you'll feel better about it instantly. Lena
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Post by Deleted on May 4, 2011 7:22:47 GMT -5
FWIW,
We splurged for our wedding. It was expensive, but paid for in cash. We are still happy with the day.
Also, may I ask, why is the ceremony so expensive?
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 4, 2011 8:56:09 GMT -5
Well, I am not going to tell you how "I" make those decisions, but I can tell you what I think YOU should do I think you should go for it. By reading your posts over the last few years, you have ALWAYS came off as sensible, responsible, logical and someone with a great head on her shoulders. I was VERY surprised to find out that you are only 25. So, for that reason I don't think that you would be considering more expensive option if there was any question in your mind whether you can afford it. Is it a splurge? Sure. So what? Get away from YM for 5 minutes and you'll feel better about it instantly. Lena Well, that's one way to look at it *blush* Lena, honestly, thank you. I'm very flattered, and this actually helped make my decision. (Also, I DID feel better when I got away from YM for a few minutes! HOW DID YOU KNOW?!) I talked to DF last night, and he agrees that we only get to do this once and ought to make the most of it. Case closed. Archie, I'll pull up the quote in a bit. I have an early meeting to go to first.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 4, 2011 9:02:32 GMT -5
Actually, nah, it's not complicated and I had it handy. Here you go:
$950 for the first 20 guests $225 for the next 60 guests ($75 for each additional 20 guests - this unfortunately got pricey) $550 for photography (we have to use their photographer, the one I picked is doing the reception which I'm okay with because they're both very good) $100 (photo disc of the ceremony, which we may or may not do) $175 (minister fee, whether we use theirs or our own) $75 (marriage license)
Total: $2,000
The package includes the chapel for an hour, the ceremony music, the bridal changing room beforehand, and a $100 credit toward their swanky condo which we'll probably end up renting (it's a 4 bedroom, would be perfect for my post-bachelorette party girl night).
Pricey, but honestly, as soon as I saw this chapel I knew it was exactly what I wanted. It's worth it to me.
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Post by Deleted on May 4, 2011 9:05:44 GMT -5
That stinks about the photographer.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 4, 2011 9:09:05 GMT -5
That's not that bad, especially if they include set up and take down of the ceremony and reception. If it is really important to you then DO IT and just cut back in places where you don't give a fig. Cut out favors. .. blam more money. Use in season local flowers instead of out of season flowers that need to be shipping in. .. blam more money. Check out Bridal Bargains (or if you are interested PM me, I THINK I might still have my copy somewhere in the house and can mail it to you). It can give you a lot of ideas on how to get what you want and how to cheap out on the rest without looking cheap. We cut out flowers for everything except what people wore/carried. We got really creative with our center pieces using paper laterns and water vases with river rocks and floating candles. It looked AMAZING. I am biased but I felt when all put together our reception could have competed with some of those photos in wedding magazines. Our wedding came to a little over $3k but I had people guessing we spent WAAAY more than that. The big argument I'd have with my husband is there is CHEAP and then there is inexpensive. I am sure you are savvy enough Firebird to be able to tell the difference.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 4, 2011 11:47:20 GMT -5
That's not that bad, especially if they include set up and take down of the ceremony and reception. If it is really important to you then DO IT and just cut back in places where you don't give a fig. Cut out favors. .. blam more money. Use in season local flowers instead of out of season flowers that need to be shipping in. .. blam more money.
Remember, that's just the ceremony. The reception is where the big money is being spent.
$2k on the ceremony, $3k on the photographer, $2.5k on the reception venue rental (including incidentals and transportation), and about $6k on basic reception costs (including alcohol).
That's $13,500. Leaves $1,500 for things like invitations, tuxes, flowers, decorations, and rings. That will bring us up to $15k, the amount DF and I agreed was acceptable for our wedding.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 4, 2011 11:59:41 GMT -5
Look for a tuxedo store that offers the deal that if you rent X amount of tuxes there you get one free. We were able to snag DH's free by using that store for all the other guys. It was only $90, but that's still $90 to put to something else.
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cael
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Post by cael on May 4, 2011 21:04:00 GMT -5
How much is your DJ, or do you have one yet? Ask for references/recommendations from recently married people you know. Gotta just say, we found out tonight how much out DJ is gonna cost. $350. ?!@?&?*#@ he came very highly recommended by several friends.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 5, 2011 10:41:43 GMT -5
IIRC, the DJ that was recommended to me was about double that (It's actually two people, a husband and wife team - so I'm sure I could find someone cheaper, or perhaps hire just one of them.)
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Post by Deleted on May 5, 2011 10:43:11 GMT -5
Depending on how structured you want the receoption to be, a lot of people are going with an Ipod loaded with your favorite music.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 5, 2011 11:50:33 GMT -5
I think we need a DJ in this space - if nothing else, we're going to need someone to count us down and make sure everyone is out in time. We're on a fairly tight schedule with this rental and I don't want to risk going over, nor do I want to have to worry about that myself.
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Post by Deleted on May 5, 2011 12:20:38 GMT -5
How much is your DJ, or do you have one yet? Ask for references/recommendations from recently married people you know. Gotta just say, we found out tonight how much out DJ is gonna cost. $350. ?!@?&?*#@ he came very highly recommended by several friends. are you considering that expensive? or cheap? In 1990 I paid $600 for a DJ (5 hours of playing).
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kgb18
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Post by kgb18 on May 5, 2011 13:41:22 GMT -5
Firebird, I think I probably said this early in this thread, but it's your wedding and if you can afford it, you should have what you want.
I'm a fairly sensible person when it comes to most things, including money. We spent about $18k on our wedding, and I don't regret it one bit. We loved our wedding. Our family and friends loved our wedding. It was just what we wanted, and I have wonderful memories of the day.
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cael
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Post by cael on May 5, 2011 13:43:15 GMT -5
How much is your DJ, or do you have one yet? Ask for references/recommendations from recently married people you know. Gotta just say, we found out tonight how much out DJ is gonna cost. $350. ?!@?&?*#@ he came very highly recommended by several friends. are you considering that expensive? or cheap? In 1990 I paid $600 for a DJ (5 hours of playing). Cheap as hell! ;D
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CarolinaKat
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Post by CarolinaKat on May 5, 2011 13:44:46 GMT -5
are you considering that expensive? or cheap? In 1990 I paid $600 for a DJ (5 hours of playing). Cheap as hell! ;D Good for you cael!!! What's your budget again? (don't answer if you don't want to)
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cael
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Post by cael on May 5, 2011 13:54:58 GMT -5
Well.... basically we just sat down & discussed what we didn't want to spend more than. My parents are covering the food & venue for us, which will total be about $10k. We're paying for everything else & didn't want to go over $5k for that 'everything else'. we're doing pretty good on that - our DJ amount had been $600 or below so this was a huge win! So far: dress: $400 tux: $100 rings: $1100 (splurged a bit there) photographer: $1700 dj: $350 cake: $600 - although my mother is forcing me to let her pay for the rest of it - we've put down $200 invitations: budgeted for $300 or less (we're using vistaprint, so it should probably almost 100% be less than this) favors: budgeted for $200ish (again hoping less) centerpieces: will depend on flowers and last but not least: flowers: budgeted about $600 This brings us to right around $5k for all this stuff. We will be going a bit over because I haven't factored in hair/makeup and a few small things (and some things I'm sure I've forgotten about). Overall I think we're doing OK - again, we've paid cash for everything thus far. It really adds up quickly ::hides from YM flames coming her way::
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kgb18
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Post by kgb18 on May 5, 2011 14:07:49 GMT -5
cael, I don't know the COL in your area, but our flowers were $1,700. That included my bouquet, the bouquets for the attendants, flowers for our mothers and grandmothers and centerpieces at the reception. We opted not to put flowers on the altar at the church.
We had calalla lillies. Our centerpieces were big hurricane vases with colored stones in the bottom, a single, large lilly filled with water with a floating candle on top. They looked very elegant but were quite cost effective.
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cael
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Post by cael on May 5, 2011 14:12:03 GMT -5
I'm basing that off what a few friends paid & what they got, I haven't gotten estimates yet from anywhere so I really don't know. All I know is that my friend who had calla lilies for us (bridesmaids) and white roses for her spent a little over a grand (that included boutaineers and some other things I think), and my friend who got married last fall spent about the same, I can't remember what she had but she didn't go too overboard either. All I'm going to be getting is a wildflower bouquet for me, smaller or varied wildflower bouquets for the 3 bridesmaids, a rose or two for the flower girl's basket, bouaineers for the 4 guys, and I'm going to wholesale wildflowers to use for the centerpieces. I've been told Stop & Shop floral is dirt cheap & does a good job. I won't know what I'm really looking at until I quit being lazy & get some estimates!
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CarolinaKat
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Post by CarolinaKat on May 5, 2011 15:27:49 GMT -5
Don't feel too bad cael. I'm fully expecting to spend an obsene (for YM) amount of flowers for my hypothetical wedding. Flowers are important to me. Although I'll probably be arranging them myself, it's a favorite hobby I have.
FWIW, I HATE CALLA LILLIES
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 5, 2011 15:31:07 GMT -5
All I'm going to be getting is a wildflower bouquet for me, smaller or varied wildflower bouquets for the 3 bridesmaids, a rose or two for the flower girl's basket, bouaineers for the 4 guys, and I'm going to wholesale wildflowers to use for the centerpiecesYou'd be amazed at the price of flowers and how they can vary. DH was bored and kept flipping thru a flower book and he'd go "I like that one" THe florist would go "That costs $X per flower" His eyes would get big and he'd go back to flipping. He could not believe one little flower cost that much. I told him he was looking at tropical flowers and we live in Iowa, what did he THINK we were going to get charged? In general going with local flowers and in season flowers is cheaper than wanting out of season flowers/flowers that need to be shipped. Flowers that are easily available in bulk also can be a lot cheaper. Also depends on how elaborate you want to go. Our boutinerres (sp?) were dirt cheap because we went with single red roses and a bit of baby's breath.
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on May 5, 2011 15:54:26 GMT -5
We got married in a garden, so the only flowers I needed were the ones being carried/worn. Ordering those flowers, though, was the only time I was bummed we lived in Seattle. In Reno, you could get these amazing gigantic South American roses in this amazing lavendar. In Seattle, no South American roses- they can't survive the journey. I still liked my flowers- I went through the wife of a co-worker, so got a discount, but I had really wanted those South American roses for my boquet.
However, my favorite boquet, as a bridesmaid, I still have. Its a lovely little metal cone with burgundy cloth flowers. It was hand made by a friend of the bride's family. The divorce was almost 10 years ago now, but I still have that lovely little boquet.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 5, 2011 15:57:28 GMT -5
I wanted snap dragons and gardenias but gardenias are insanely expensive because they are so delicate. I went with roses and snap dragons instead.
Snap dragons remind me of my grandfather in case anyone is wondering about the odd flower choice. Gardenias were my grandmother's favorite.
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