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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 10:51:49 GMT -5
For those with kids in high school do you push them into extra-curriculars? I know sports are a no go with my son, but I really think he should try some other things and with no "encouragement" to join he won't.
The school has been very adamant about extra curricular being very important and they are copying me on emails to DS about signing up for things. They also award a scholarship to each graduating senior and it's amount is based on three things (equally weighted), your ACT score, your GPA and your involvement in extra-curriculars. So that is in the back of my head too.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Sept 21, 2016 10:53:59 GMT -5
I would push him. Sometimes that's what is needed. I'm naturally very shy. Speeches or presentations used to terrify me. My stepmom forced me into activities in high school. It helped me get a full ride scholarship.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 10:58:27 GMT -5
Ironically Speech Team is the one really after him. I have had several parents come up to me and say "You should get him on Speech team", and the kids tell him it's great. There are 70 students on the team, the most participated extra-curricular at the school. I just got an email from one of the coaches saying they were sorry he couldn't make it to the kick-off meeting Monday due to Scouts (someone must have told him because DS sure didn't), and she'd like to set up a private appt. to talk to him. I think he should do it.
I get his side. I would sooner have cut off my hand then join speech, but to his day I suffer from very poor oral communication skills too. I would like him to get past that.
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chen35
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Post by chen35 on Sept 21, 2016 11:00:05 GMT -5
I think speech would be beneficial for just about anyone. I think you should try to get him to do it, if you think he would allow himself to get something out of it.
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ken a.k.a OMK
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Post by ken a.k.a OMK on Sept 21, 2016 11:04:45 GMT -5
Clubs for anything he's interested in would be good.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Sept 21, 2016 11:07:32 GMT -5
Pushing the speech club is a good idea. I would have been like him too. But getting over it helped me tremendously in life. I wish I would have done it sooner.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Sept 21, 2016 11:08:42 GMT -5
Kids will participate in "extra-curricular" activities. It is a good idea for them to be activities sponsored and supervised by responsible adults.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Sept 21, 2016 11:09:13 GMT -5
It depends.
Our kids only going to school isn't an option.
However, we limit extra-curriculars, depending on the child.
DS can't be over scheduled. It doesn't work for him. So, a few things are fine. For him, it will be scouts and at least baseball. He's also talking about umping, which is a paying job. (He can start when he turns 13). I don't think he'll take up an instrument. But, he's talking about owning his own business, so I could see him joining an after school club for future business types. DS is also giggity over 3D printers. So, if there's something that is offered after school he might take it. Plus, kids have to volunteer in public high school. I could totally see him joining a group that volunteers or advocates for social causes. He also wants to learn french, so there might be a club for that.
DD1 can handle doing way more stuff. I expect that she will be busier.
I think DD2 will shock us. I think she's going to be into everything.
What I'm trying to say is that scouts and an instrument, right now can be enough for your son, especially if he doesn't thrive on being busy 24/7. I've found that parents at private schools want to make sure their kids have every opportunity. Which means pushing their kids to be over scheduled with extra curriculars and applying for like 12 schools when it comes time to going to college.
My office mate has a daughter that is a freshman in HS. She's doing soccer. At our public HS, my office mate said they tell the kids to pick one (1) thing to get involved with their freshman year.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:10:30 GMT -5
I think it will help him too. He's smart, but bumbles a lot talking in front of people and he has so many presentations to give in all his classes. Two of the 3 boys he went on the scout trip this Summer are on the team and love it and one of them has a speech impediment (he stutters), so it's not like you have to be a great speaker to join.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:14:43 GMT -5
It depends. Our kids only going to school isn't an option. However, we limit extra-curriculars, depending on the child. DS can't be over scheduled. It doesn't work for him. So, a few things are fine. For him, it will be scouts and at least baseball. He's also talking about umping, which is a paying job. (He can start when he turns 13). I don't think he'll take up an instrument. But, he's talking about owning his own business, so I could see him joining an after school club for future business types. DS is also giggity over 3D printers. So, if there's something that is offered after school he might take it. Plus, kids have to volunteer in public high school. I could totally see him joining a group that volunteers or advocates for social causes. He also wants to learn french, so there might be a club for that. DD1 can handle doing way more stuff. I expect that she will be busier. I think DD2 will shock us. I think she's going to be into everything. What I'm trying to say is that scouts and an instrument, right now can be enough for your son, especially if he doesn't thrive on being busy 24/7. I've found that parents at private schools want to make sure their kids have every opportunity. Which means pushing their kids to be over scheduled with extra curriculars and applying for like 12 schools when it comes time to going to college. My office mate has a daughter that is a freshman in HS. She's doing soccer. At our public HS, my office mate said they tell the kids to pick one (1) thing to get involved with their freshman year. DS brings up that he's in Scouts...and that's a huge time suck, but as far as the school is concerned it doesn't exist. He also plays in a Jazz combo on Wednesday nights. I think he has enough on his plate as it is. I'm torn. My boss has 5 kids and they're in like EVERYTHING. I don't know HTH they do it? Every sport, speech, campus ministry, scouts, choir, plays, marching band...it's insane.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Sept 21, 2016 11:18:16 GMT -5
I was also thinking that your son does scouting which should count as an extra curricular. Is he in any other bands outside of class? That would count too.
Not that speech is a bad idea, but it doesn't seem like he's just going to and from school.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Sept 21, 2016 11:21:07 GMT -5
It depends. Our kids only going to school isn't an option. However, we limit extra-curriculars, depending on the child. DS can't be over scheduled. It doesn't work for him. So, a few things are fine. For him, it will be scouts and at least baseball. He's also talking about umping, which is a paying job. (He can start when he turns 13). I don't think he'll take up an instrument. But, he's talking about owning his own business, so I could see him joining an after school club for future business types. DS is also giggity over 3D printers. So, if there's something that is offered after school he might take it. Plus, kids have to volunteer in public high school. I could totally see him joining a group that volunteers or advocates for social causes. He also wants to learn french, so there might be a club for that. DD1 can handle doing way more stuff. I expect that she will be busier. I think DD2 will shock us. I think she's going to be into everything. What I'm trying to say is that scouts and an instrument, right now can be enough for your son, especially if he doesn't thrive on being busy 24/7. I've found that parents at private schools want to make sure their kids have every opportunity. Which means pushing their kids to be over scheduled with extra curriculars and applying for like 12 schools when it comes time to going to college. My office mate has a daughter that is a freshman in HS. She's doing soccer. At our public HS, my office mate said they tell the kids to pick one (1) thing to get involved with their freshman year. DS brings up that he's in Scouts...and that's a huge time suck, but as far as the school is concerned it doesn't exist. He also plays in a Jazz combo on Wednesday nights. I think he has enough on his plate as it is. I'm torn. My boss has 5 kids and they're in like EVERYTHING. I don't know HTH they do it? Every sport, speech, campus ministry, scouts, choir, plays, marching band...it's insane. The school might not care, but will the colleges since that's what they are supposedly worried about. I feel for those kids, sounds like they never stop. I know there are some that thrive on that, but a lot of us would hate every scheduled second. My theory on kid's and their schedules is that they are the ones who have to do the actual work of participating so make sure they actually want to. I'd have made everyone in the speech club miserable if I'd been forced to participate.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:21:14 GMT -5
I was also thinking that your son does scouting which should count as an extra curricular. Is he in any other bands outside of class? That would count too. Not that speech is a bad idea, but it doesn't seem like he's just going to and from school. He is in a jazz band on Wednesday nights with the local conservatory for the arts. It's located right next to the high school campus, but not part of the school. It's actually part of one of the universities in the town. He said he'd do marching band next year which is also a huge commitment.
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Tiny
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Post by Tiny on Sept 21, 2016 11:23:41 GMT -5
I don't have kids. But, I was the kid that needed a little encouragement or push to do stuff. Just make your encouragement/push is taken in a positive way. Personally, I was TERRIFIED to sign up for something - because it would require that I walk into a room full of kids I might not know AND/OR a walk into a situation where I might not know what to do or say right off the bat. That situation is the kind of thing that sets me up for a panic attack - and panic attacks are NOT fun. This was back in the day when "panic attacks" were imaginary made up things used as an excuse because you were 'lazy' or intentionally being uncooperative. I didn't get much positive encouragement from home to do stuff - but I had friends doing interesting stuff so I tended to follow them. The whole panic attack thing makes it interesting at work... I HATE going to meet and greets or company sponsored events - not because I don't like the get together thing but because they are prime Panic Attack triggers and I need to be prepared before going to them to alleviate/derail the panic that may wash over me.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Sept 21, 2016 11:24:16 GMT -5
Why doesn't scouts count? It doesn't sound to me like your son is a couch potato, he's plenty busy. I would fight the school on that but that's just me.
My HS sweetheart was in scouts and it IS a major time suck. He did band in high school for all four years. We met in drama club but he eventually dropped out because it conflicted too much with his other stuff.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Sept 21, 2016 11:26:22 GMT -5
Marching band will be a huge time suck. Back in the dark ages we had Tuesday and Thursday practice, Friday night games, Saturdays could have parades or marching contests to attend..... Add that to Scouts and it sounds like he has plenty to do. I know he won't do band until next year, but he'll need time to do homework now and then.
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jeep108
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Post by jeep108 on Sept 21, 2016 11:31:01 GMT -5
Sounds like he has plenty to do already.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:31:09 GMT -5
I don't have kids. But, I was the kid that needed a little encouragement or push to do stuff. Just make your encouragement/push is taken in a positive way. Personally, I was TERRIFIED to sign up for something - because it would require that I walk into a room full of kids I might not know AND/OR a walk into a situation where I might not know what to do or say right off the bat. That situation is the kind of thing that sets me up for a panic attack - and panic attacks are NOT fun. This was back in the day when "panic attacks" were imaginary made up things used as an excuse because you were 'lazy' or intentionally being uncooperative. I didn't get much positive encouragement from home to do stuff - but I had friends doing interesting stuff so I tended to follow them. The whole panic attack thing makes it interesting at work... I HATE going to meet and greets or company sponsored events - not because I don't like the get together thing but because they are prime Panic Attack triggers and I need to be prepared before going to them to alleviate/derail the panic that may wash over me. I had panic attacks back before they knew what they were. It's why I ended up dropping out of high school my junior year. I just couldn't go in the building anymore. I'd literally pass out. They wanted to put me in a genuine mental institution for this and my Mom said, no way. She would rather me carry the stigma of high school drop out.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:31:52 GMT -5
Why doesn't scouts count? It doesn't sound to me like your son is a couch potato, he's plenty busy. I would fight the school on that but that's just me. My HS sweetheart was in scouts and it IS a major time suck. He did band in high school for all four years. We met in drama club but he eventually dropped out because it conflicted too much with his other stuff. Scouts doesn't count as school extra-curricular for the foundation scholarship.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Sept 21, 2016 11:32:26 GMT -5
I was only in one extra curricular and not even for all 4 years. I also had a job at the mall. I still went to college and then got a different job.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:33:39 GMT -5
Marching band will be a huge time suck. Back in the dark ages we had Tuesday and Thursday practice, Friday night games, Saturdays could have parades or marching contests to attend..... Add that to Scouts and it sounds like he has plenty to do. I know he won't do band until next year, but he'll need time to do homework now and then. Ours is all day for the first two weeks of the summer and then 2 hours a day Monday through Friday the entire month of June. There is a band trip the first week of July and then they get a few weeks off until mid-August when it kicks in again for a few things. Right now, just for REGULAR band at school he is required to play at 11 games and 7 concerts during the year.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Sept 21, 2016 11:34:31 GMT -5
Why doesn't scouts count? It doesn't sound to me like your son is a couch potato, he's plenty busy. I would fight the school on that but that's just me. My HS sweetheart was in scouts and it IS a major time suck. He did band in high school for all four years. We met in drama club but he eventually dropped out because it conflicted too much with his other stuff. Scouts doesn't count as school extra-curricular for the foundation scholarship. Just the one scholarship? How many others are out there?
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Sept 21, 2016 11:36:36 GMT -5
Marching band will be a huge time suck. Back in the dark ages we had Tuesday and Thursday practice, Friday night games, Saturdays could have parades or marching contests to attend..... Add that to Scouts and it sounds like he has plenty to do. I know he won't do band until next year, but he'll need time to do homework now and then. Ours is all day for the first two weeks of the summer and then 2 hours a day Monday through Friday the entire month of June. There is a band trip the first week of July and then they get a few weeks off until mid-August when it kicks in again for a few things. Right now, just for REGULAR band at school he is required to play at 11 games and 7 concerts during the year. oh yeah, the summer stuff. Ours was backwards, twice a week most of the summer to work on the music and have a chance to memorize it and then band camp two weeks before school starts to do the marching stuff. It was really it's own part time job. Lol
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:39:20 GMT -5
Scouts doesn't count as school extra-curricular for the foundation scholarship. Just the one scholarship? How many others are out there? I suppose. Every graduate gets this scholarship though, it just seems like an easy way to bump up the dollar amount....but maybe not.
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Sept 21, 2016 11:39:57 GMT -5
He's now in BOY Scouts, right? Moved up from Cub Scouts? My kids dropped out in Boy Scouts (although YDS told me this summer that he is sorry that he did). BOY Scouts is very time-demanding. Weekly meetings, tons of campouts, prepping for it all, working toward badges and on projects aimed at becoming an Eagle Scout, helping the Cub Scouts, appearing at Town ceremonies and events, volunteering. It sounds like a simple activity, but maybe depending upon the troop, it takes far more time than a simple weekly meeting. We have a small, but well-regarded, Boy Scout troop in town. While many of the boys in the troop also played sports, I know from speaking to the parents that their sons' participation in Boy Scouts opened many college doors. Colleges apparently rank it high as an extracurricular (for the commitment).
I'd also encourage Speech, though. It will help him with not only his speech skills, he'll also gain some poise and confidence in stressful situations. Can you convince him to commit to one semester/quarter to give it a try, at least?
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:46:40 GMT -5
He's now in BOY Scouts, right? Moved up from Cub Scouts? Yes, he's been in Boy Scouts for 3 or 4 years now and is starting his second year as Troop Guide for the younger scouts that just transitioned from Cub. He is the highest rank below Eagle now. Still a lot of work to go to get that, but it's in his sites anyhow. He has never missed a single meeting or campout, not one, and that's a LOT. They camp almost every month year round and there is always things going on with them.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Sept 21, 2016 11:49:06 GMT -5
I was also thinking that your son does scouting which should count as an extra curricular. Is he in any other bands outside of class? That would count too. Not that speech is a bad idea, but it doesn't seem like he's just going to and from school. He is in a jazz band on Wednesday nights with the local conservatory for the arts. It's located right next to the high school campus, but not part of the school. It's actually part of one of the universities in the town. He said he'd do marching band next year which is also a huge commitment. And he's struggled with getting homework done too--right? I'd tell the school that he is working hard in scouts and band, will most likely to marching band next year. That you'll encourage him, but not push him so that he can focus on academics along with the stuff he's already in.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Sept 21, 2016 11:52:02 GMT -5
He's now in BOY Scouts, right? Moved up from Cub Scouts? Yes, he's been in Boy Scouts for 3 or 4 years now and is starting his second year as Troop Guide for the younger scouts that just transitioned from Cub. He is the highest rank below Eagle now. Still a lot of work to go to get that, but it's in his sites anyhow. He has never missed a single meeting or campout, not one, and that's a LOT. They camp almost every month year round and there is always things going on with them. I know you mentioned that your son was somewhat socially awkward. If he loves Scouts, and is getting on well with the other boys, I would be loathe to ask him to cut back on that activity in favor of one at the school. If speech club doesn't take up a great deal of time I'd encourage participation but otherwise I'd let him continue to enjoy Scouts and Jazz Band. Those activities seem to make him happy, which will only help with his self-esteem.
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movingforward
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Post by movingforward on Sept 21, 2016 11:54:07 GMT -5
I was only in one extra curricular and not even for all 4 years. I also had a job at the mall. I still went to college and then got a different job. I am not sure what year you graduated HS but this was pretty standard for myself and just about everyone I grew up with. I am Gen X, or what I refer to as "The Fast Times at Ridgemont High" generation. We were all expected to get part-time jobs when we turned 16 so one extra curricular was definitely enough. Teenagers worked at malls, fast food restaurants, drug stores, etc. I rarely see teenagers in these jobs now. I see college students doing some of them but definitely not high schoolers.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 21, 2016 11:59:06 GMT -5
He is in a jazz band on Wednesday nights with the local conservatory for the arts. It's located right next to the high school campus, but not part of the school. It's actually part of one of the universities in the town. He said he'd do marching band next year which is also a huge commitment. And he's struggled with getting homework done too--right? I'd tell the school that he is working hard in scouts and band, will most likely to marching band next year. That you'll encourage him, but not push him so that he can focus on academics along with the stuff he's already in. Yes, he was God awful at it in middle school, but knock on wood, he's been putting in a lot more effort into getting it done in high school. I think I may have drove home the point about how important it was from here on out. Either that or it's just that he hasn't gotten comfortable enough in the new school yet to test the boundaries. At the halfway point for first quarter he was getting straight A's! Not really any tests or projects on their yet though, just homework and a few quizzes. But still, great improvement over not bothering with the work at all!
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